Or Maybe Not
On a normal day, Twilight Sparkle would be able to wake up at her usual time of 6:00 AM. She would then wake up her assistant, Spike, and take a shower while he made breakfast. Twilight would then read until 8:00 or until one of her friends came to her with a problem. It was a very elaborate system that had taken her a lot of time to think of. However, today was not a normal day and this schedule was not going to be followed. It was five in the morning, but Twilight was already wide awake. The cause for the alicorn's insomnia? It would probably be the egotistic blue unicorn pounding on her front door. Even when Twilight covered her head with a pillow, she could still hear the aggressive mare knocking on her door.
"Twilight Sparkle!" she cried. "The Great and Powerful Trixie demands you let her into your home." Finally, Twilight had had enough and decided to rid herself of the problem. Slowly, the mare lifted herself out of bed and trotted to the window. Twilight used her magic to open it and stuck her head outside. Trixie continued to knock on the door with her hoof until a voice made her look up.
"Trixie!" she yelled. "For Celestia's sake, it's five in the morning! What could you possibly want?"
"If it isn't Twilight Sparkle, Trixie did not know you would be here. So we meet again."
"What do you mean you didn't know I was here? This is my house and you were calling out my name!"
"Don't try and lie to the Great and Powerful Trixie! She is too smart to have anything pass over her head."
"Too smart!" Twilight chuckled. "There is now way I would consider you smart."
"Trixie is offended greatly! She is indeed intelligent! She bets she could even be as smart as you, Sparkle."
"You, as smart as me! Don't make me laugh. There is now way you are my intellectual equal."
"Oh yeah! What makes you sure you are indeed smarter than Trixie?"
"I have an IQ of 200. That's almost impossible to get. I only missed one question on my IQ test." she remarked.
"Oh really. Well, Trixie bets she could take that same test and get a perfect score. That will prove she is smart than you!"
"In that case, I'll let you in and you can take it right now!"
"Can you two please just shut up!" yelled an angry purple dragon that had just been woken up. "Some of us are trying to sleep!"
After Twilight had gone downstairs to let Trixie in, she immediately began searching for the test. Being the organized pony that she was, Twilight found the test, along with a copy of the correct answers, in a matter of seconds. She handed the blank test and a pencil to Trixie.
"Ok, Trixie. You will have one hour to complete this test. If you somehow manage to get a perfect score, you will have proven yourself smarter than I." Trixie raised a hoof in the air as if she expected Twilight to call on her to speak. "Yes, Trixie?"
"And if Trixie does not get a perfect score?" Twilight looked at the mare blankly before speaking.
"You will have proven that you are not smarter than me."
"Oh, ok. Ready when you are."
"Great! Your time starts now!" Twilight said as she hit the timer. Over the next hour, Trixie used every ounce of her brainpower to complete the test to the best of her ability. One by one, she answered the questions carefully. Trixie blew through the multiple choice, aced the true or false, and finished the short response. By the time the hour was up, Trixie was confident that she had gotten a perfect score. "Allright, Trixie. It is time to grade your test."
"Wait! Trixie thinks it is unfair for you to grade Trixie's test. How does she know that you will not cheat?"
"Ok, then we will just have Spike do it." At the sound of his name, the dragon scurried into the living room. "Spike, take Trixie's test and grade it. Here are the answers."
"Gotcha, Twi. I'll be right back." Spike said as he began to check the test's results. Trixie could see the dragon make a pencil mark after every question, but she wasn't sure if it was a check mark or an x. "Ok!" he announced when he was done. "I've got the results right here."
"So, how many did she get wrong?" Twilight asked smugly.
"None."
"What!" exclaimed both mares.
"It seems that Trixie got every question right. Sorry, Twi."
"This can't be. How can I be less smart than Trixie?" she cried as she fell to the ground. Trixie laughed and danced around the library while Twilight began to weep. "This can't be happening!"
"Sorry Twilight, but Trixie has proven to herself to be more smarter than you!"
"Just smarter."
"What?"
"More smarter doesn't make sense. You just have to say smarter."
"What would you know, dummy. I'm the intelligent one." Trixie said as she continued dancing around the room. "The Great and Powerful...and Intelligent...Trixie is the smartest pony in all of Equestria!" Finally, Spike couldn't hold it in any longer. He suddenly fell to the ground and rolled around laughing. Trixie stopped her celebrating when she saw the dragon's actions. "Why are you laughing, lizard? Trixie has just proven herself to be smarter than your master?" Spike sat up and composed himself before answering the unicorn.
"I was kidding when I said you got every question right!"
For the second time, both Trixie and Twilight said, "What!"
"Trixie didn't get a perfect score. In fact, she didn't even get one question correct!"
"But that means Trixie isn't smarter than Twilight. She's a whole lot more dumber."
"Again, just dumber." Twilight explained.
"Shut up, Sparkle. No need to rub it in!" yelled Trixie as she began to walk out the door.
"Wait, Trixie!" exclaimed Twilight as Trixie stopped and turned around. "If you didn't get one question right, that technically means you have an IQ of 0. That's incredible!"
"Yes! The Great and Powerful Trixie has amazed you once again!" the unicorn yelled as she galloped out the door.
"Well, Spike." Twilight began. "I guess we found the stupidest mare in Equestria."
"I guess so." A long silence passed in between them. "Want me to tell Celestia about this?"
"Definitely."
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Ego testical rambling commence!
Nice idea. Could be drawn out more, and it needs more of a spark of life to get the characters' personalities across
dick move twi
4820225 To 4chan!!!
Short and sweet. I think it could've been drawn out a bit more, but it got a laugh out of me, and I suppose there's not much more you could've done. Nice story you've got here. 8/10.
I like it you need to make a sequel of it where trixie and celestia meet and stuff it made laughter and giggle at the ghosties
Or Twilight discovers that Spike was lying the second time and Trixie really IS smarter, but he was just trying to spare Twily's feelings!
Or, you know, not. 'Cause comedy.
Does that mean that even Derpy Hooves is smarter than Trixie?
Oh fuck you Twilight thats not nice at all! I mean the telling Celestia part.
Still laughed a bit... Short fic tho.
Trixie just doodles,
thank you short attention-
You! Tell Trixie She's pretty!
-Spirit
Can you write another story about Spike saying only one word over and over again?
Saw it coming, but it was funnier in my head.
OOC Twilight, but still an amusing little story.
smarter derpy FTW
Okay just no.
Trixie isn't stupid. She's just eccentric, short-sighted, and self-centered.
4821048
Dude, chill out. It's only a story. It's not real.
4820225 It's egotistical.
4821714
static.fjcdn.com/comments/5222913+_13acb23c760a88a5fd38ae02ba10bdf9.jpg
Everyone is horribly out of character, and that's not how IQ is measured. IQ is standardized to a normal distribution with mean 100 and standard deviation 15.
And then they kissed.
4820950 I thought it would be something like "I pulled out the wrong paper. That's a 1st grade standardized test."
Trixie goes to Twilight's house and demands to be let in. Twilight has no intention of doing so yet, after only a minute of talking with Trixie, opens her door and lets Trixie in. The results of the test are irrelevant since Trixie just outsmarted Twilight.
4821868
That and in a way, your IQ is a measurement of how well you take IQ tests. I have an IQ of 164 yet there are many things in life I'm completely moronic at.
4821695 you have to remember that it's 5 in the morning and trixie won't let twilight sleep
You guys do know that IQ Tests aren't even widely used anymore, right? Because everyone realized it's NOT an effective way of measuring one's intelligence.
This story doesn't make sense. None of the characters are acting like themselves. They aren't talking like people talk. And why was Trixie even there in the first place?
im worried that their is NOTHING Twilight WOULDN"T tell Celestia
Actually, when you think about it, getting a zero on a multiple choice test is pretty incredible. Even if you just guess randomly, it's almost impossible to miss all of them.
4822873
I'm right there with you.
On a test of intelligence: Aced every question
On a test of social skills: Flunked horribly
On a test of useful trivia: Aced every question
On a test of useless trivia: Barely passed
On a test of how much voltage can be sucked out of a battery: Apparently watches can be turned into tasers.
On a test of how to not look like a dumbass asking a girl out: My foot tastes like failure.
4825034 Well, I dont like that Twilight told everyone, but I dont really blame her for the IQ test. I'm sure that not even Twilight could have guess the score.
Well, this was mean-spirited, they were all out-of-character and just...
Yeah...you kind of ruin the twist/punchline when you make it the title....
LEAVE TRIXIE ALONE!
This was... awful.
Let's be honest, in Spike's position, don't tell me you WOULDN'T pull that stunt too.
Well, that was a waste of my time
4827235
Well, that was a waist of thyme.
4827258
Well, that was a melting pot of friendship
2/10 would only fuck if desperate.
4826535 NO!!!
4825034
For one. Twilight only told Celestia. Her mother-figure and likely the pony she trusts most in the world. Trixie, who gets work by reputation, will not be bothered if three entities know she is incredibly stupid. Your allusions to Twilight having somehow wronged Trixie or destroyed her social and professional ability are literally all in your head and not supported by the story in any way.
Having a laugh with her confidant over her frenemy being stupid isn't even questionable. They're ponies, they're people. They're not friggin' saints. You don't have to be a jackass to laugh about someone annoying you being absolutely silly. Nor does it make you a jackass for doing so. Trixie waking up the ever-scheduled and ever-busy Twilight is getting off with only a letter to Celestia.
I may not be Twilight Sparkle, but I hit people who wake me up for no good goddamn reason. Anyone coming to wake me up on a whim knows this, and doesn't particularly mind the bruise. Here we have Twilight, whose /schedule/ has been interrupted, by an annoying mare who is yelling about how much better she is than Twilight at the one thing Twilight holds to be nearly inalienable and likely the very core of her self-image. If you can't understand how seriously frustrating this is, you are a lucky person and not qualified to give such a vehement opinion on the subject.
Another "Trixie comes to challenge Twilight without the slightest scrap of a plan, gets beaten and humiliated without the slightest effort" fanfic.
Just... meh.
4828342 HOW COULD YOU?
I think you mean "no way".
4830532
Apparently you maintain the maturity of a ten year-old with a comment like that. How's /b/ these days? That aside, you're talking to the wrong person if you want to gloat about your... heh, misbegotten fury. All the same, you completely failed to disprove anything I said. All you were capable of in the end, was acting like a chump brat. My point stands, and has been proven. Show some shame.
4829340 Easy
4831164
These people and their hate of Trixie...
4831241 I don't hate Trixie I just love the fimfics about her, whether they are bad to Trix or not