• Published 15th Apr 2012
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Patchwork Pony - Drax99



A monster pony wakes up with no memory, and is befriended by the CMC.

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ѽAppledoomѽ

First thang Ah... Ahem, sorry. Sometimes I forget to write proper equestrian, and my accent comes out on the page. As I was saying, the first thing I saw was my angry sister’s face, glaring at me as I woke up. First I tried to ignore it and go back to sleep, but she was having none of that.

“Applebloom, Ah know yer awake. Git yer tail outta bed an explain ta me why the third bow this week is laying ruined in yer trash!” She drove her point home by yanking the protective blanket off my flank.

“Aww sis, Ah’m sorry. We got ta warshin, and the water got everywhere. At least Ah got my bath, right?” I tried my best cute lil sister look. It sometimes actually works, although today she was not falling for it.

“No way young lady. Them bows cost bits we ain't got. Even bein friends wit Rarity don't get me bows fer free, and this tie yer gonna have to work ta pay fer the new one. Now git yer lil flank outta bed and down to breakfast. You got some chores to do.”

With a groan, I rolled outta bed and shambled into the bathroom. The previous day had drained most of my normal energy, and I was feeling old and tired, like my sister. I felt like, fifteen years old! How do old people even get out of bed feeling like this? Looking in the mirror I saw my coat still stained lightly with reddish-brown, and groaned at the thought of my sister seeing the mess my mane had become. I decided a proper shower was in order, and decided I was grown up enough for one today. Baths were for fillies! After cleaning most of the stains out of my coat, and only using about half of Applejack’s special mane shampoo, I felt ready to face the day. I had alot of work to do before I met up with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, and we decided what to do about our new friend, Patches.

Trotting down to the kitchen, my sister raised an eyebrow at my sparkling clean mane, but decided not to comment, instead placing a plate of pancakes in front of me. “Eat up, little sis, it’s gonna be a busy day.”

“Thanks AJ, kin Ah have some coffee?” Again, I beamed my best smile, and again it failed to hit it’s target.

Snorting, my sister just poured a glass in front of me. “Ya git juice. Yer still too young fer coffee. Hay, some days Ah think Ah’m too young fer coffee, but it gits me goin. Gotta remember to thank Pinkie fer intraducin me to it.” She breathed deep from her own steamy mug, while I just glared jealously.

“Didn’t Pinkie have to give up coffee?” I asked innocently, trying to make her feel at least a bit guilty.

“Ahh hah...” She laughed nervously, looking at her own cup. “Ah thought we all agreed ta not talk ‘bout The Incident. Besides, that's why she gave me her special blend.”

“I hear they finally finished repairs on the town hall, but there are still three ponies in therapy.” My brother chimed in as he entered the kitchen, and poured himself a glass of cider. He never needed coffee to get going in the morning, and was always talking about clean living and natural foods. Well, as much as he ever talked. Ok, so he just says ‘nope’ when ya ask him, but we all understand. Having exhausted his vocabulary for the day, he sat down to the table and started into his morning plate of pancakes.

Granny Smith came in finally, and took her place at the head of the table. A single pancake and a bowl of prunes was her usual meal of choice. She sniffed derisively at the smell of coffee and glared at Applejack. “Nasty stuff that coffee. I hear it kin kill a pony iffin ya drink too much. Gimme my tea wit a shot ‘o apple brandy any day. That’ll put some spring in yer step, and a cutie mark on yer arse!”

“Granny! Watch yer language around Applebloom, you know how impressionable she is.” AJ snapped, but obeyed all the same.

“Arse! I wanna cuppa that for mah arse!” I giggled, knowing my sister would be fuming.

“Don't you start little lady. Ah kin still bust your ‘arse’ iffin ya keep up that language!” I decided to choose my battles and remained silent for the rest of the meal, but my muzzle was feeling sore from the grin on my face.


Soon enough the meal was done, Granny was napping, and I was helping AJ with the dishes. Now was the perfect time to ask the favor I needed. “So Applejack, me an the Crusaders are gonna have a party at the clubhouse, and Ah was wonderin’ if we kin git some food outta the stores?”

“Uh-huh. An what exactly happened to all the food from yesterday?” She raised an eyebrow and glared at me. I did my best not to meet her gaze as I shuffled my hooves and thought fast.

“Oh, ah, you know bout that huh? Well we had a picnic, an all. It was a blast, but we kinda got all messy, which is why my bow was all ruined, an stuff.” I looked up and tried to give my best innocent filly look. I swear I even heard the ding of a halo appearing over my head.

She wasn't buying it. Never try to fool the element of Honesty. She just narrowed her eyes at me as her face clouded over. “That was enough food ta feed three grown ponies, an yer tellin me you three fillies are it all by yerself?”

With a sigh I began to explain, “Well ya see, Scootaloo...”

“Wait, Scoots? She’s stayin in the treehouse ain't she? You brought the food fer her?”

“W-well, yea, kinda. She stayed over last night.” I latched onto the story, and went with it.

“Aww Celestia, you didn't tell her didja? We all promised ta keep our noses outta it.”

“No, no! Ah didn't say nuttin bout her folks. That would crush her! I could never do that ta her.” I shook my head violently. Poor Scootaloo, everypony in Ponyville knew she was alone, but we all agreed to abide by her father’s wishes and let her find her own way, even though most of us thought it was wrong. She didn't even know he was gone, and I only knew because I had caught my sister crying after she found his note. They were good friends once.

“Ah swear, it’s just awful. That poor filly all alone, thinkin her parents are comin back fer her. It just ain't right!” AJ started to rant, “As Celestia is mah witness, iffin she was mah kin, I’d never have treated her wrong like that. Ah still hate her father fer makin me promise not to interfere.”

“Ah know, you and Dad would never leave me alone like that...” Too late I realised my mistake as the look of anger on my sister’s face turned to shock.

“Applebloom! How many time Ah gotta tell you? Big macintosh is not yer Pa, and Ah’m not yer Ma!” She shook her head, “Ah swear child, Ah dunno what is wrrrong wit that head o’ yours.”

“A-ah know sis, it’s just... sometimes Ah wish Ah had a Ma and Pa like other ponies. An then DIamond Tiara an Silver Spoon said...” I tried my best not to break down crying, but the tears were building up behind the dam.

In a flash her hooves were around me holding me close. “Ah don’t care what them two mules say bout it! They dun know nuttin an only wanna hurt you. You have a Ma and a Pa, same as me and Big Mac, an they loved you very much. But their time came as it does fer us all, and they had to move on.” The tears were flowing freely now as she took my head in her hooves and looked me straight in the eyes, our foreheads touching under the brim of her hat. “Applebloom, Ah can only hope that iffin one day Ah have a filly of mah own, that she is half as wonderful as you. But you are NOT my filly. You are my SISTER, an Ah love ya all the same. We may not be yer Ma an Pa, but we are yer kin, and we will always be there fer ya.”

I sniffed, and wiped my tears. “B-but Miss Cherilee said, when two ponies sleep togeather...”

“For the love of apples, girl! That was one time, because Big Mac dun broke his bed! And I seem to recall a certain yeller filly that come running in to share the bed with us cuz she was a’scared o’ the storm.” She sighed, rolling her eyes at me. I could feel a blush come over my face as she reminded me. We didn’ get no sleep that night, an we sure as hay didn’ do any foolin around!”

I began to giggle at the memory, now long past and alot funnier than when it happened. “I remember Big Mac fell off the bed and pulled somethin awful, an you had ta do applebuckin all by yerself.” I gave her a big hug. “Ah’m sorry sis.”

“T’wernt nuttin. Jes git that crazy idea outta yer head. We may be country, but we ain't THAT country. I sure as hay ain't like that with mah brother.” She hugged me back. “Some day yer gonna be all big an growed up, an you will understand.”

“But Ah AM all growed up!” I cried, putting on the patented Applepout™.

“Sure ya are sugercube. Now git yer supplies and go have fun wit yer friends. Just be back by sundown.”

Realizing I had just gotten out of whatever chores were planned for me, I quickly bolted out of the room.

In no time at all I had all my supplies in the crusader wagon, and was trotting off to meet my friends.


It sure was a stroke of luck that Miss Rarity made me this harness to pull the wagon. After the time Scootaloo hurt her wing and I had to haul her and Sweetie around, I found out that I shared something with my brother, I was strong! Well really, all earth ponies are strong, but for my age I’m told I am alot stronger than average. I may not be able to pull off any fancy acrobatics like Scoots, but I can run just as fast! And like my sister, I liked running.

In no time at all I had crossed the orchard and made it to the clearing where the clubhouse rose above the other trees. Unfastening myself from the wagon, I made my way up to the door to peek in. As I stuck my head inside, Patches turned to look at me, holding a hoof to his lips to keep me quiet, before returning to his silent vigil staring out the window. Beside him was the cutest site I had ever seen, as Scootaloo slept peacefully curled up like a baby kitten. It was a heart melting sight to see the normally energetic and twitchy pegasus resting so calm and relaxed. Her bravado was gone, and in it’s place was a quiet innocence that made me smile and feel so happy for my troubled friend.

I quietly lay down beside her, sharing some of the warmth that radiated off the massive pony besides us, and I just relaxed and enjoyed the feeling of calm. It felt right, like the larger pony was already one of us, even though we had only just met him. He was an outsider like us, banded together against the world, looking for our place.

The moment of introspective peace... What? I kin read! Ah go ta school like everypony else, an Ah ain't stupid. Ah may not talk all fancy all the time but mah mind is as sharp as any unicorn! Oh horseapples, Ah’m doing it again ain't Ah?

Ahem. So, soon enough we were interrupted by the rather ungraceful entrance of a certain unicorn filly. She busted in, and I got to see the pegasus flight response up close and personal, as Scootaloo simultaneously woke up, lept several feet in the air, and tried to fly out the nearest window. Unfortunately for her, the nearest window was actually a painting of the night sky tacked to the wall, and she ended with a series of rather loud thuds on the floor, hooves in the air and eyes rotating in opposite directions.

“Ohmygosh! I am so sorry! Did I wake everypony up?” The white filly looked stricken as she tried to get a grasp on what she had just caused. Patches just gently nuzzled our flier friend as I rolled my own eyes and got to my hooves. I swear sometimes, between the three of us, we would never live to get our cutie marks.

“Really, Sweetie, do ya gotta be so darn loud when ya come bustin inta a room? Ya dun scart us half ta death!” I trotted out without waiting for a reply, and made for the goodies in the wagon. Thus was life as a Cutie Mark Crusader.

Soon enough the others has regrouped and joined me in unloading the wagon. Provisions enough to last a few days were quickly pillaged and about half of it was stashed away for later. Scootaloo and patches seemed to be trying to outdo each other in cramming food away, while me and Sweetie took a more refined approach to the meal I had brought. Yea, me, refined. The idea that I was one of the dainty ones of the group almost made me spit my hay.

Afterwards the Council of Crusaders was convened and we planned our next crusade. I was all for asking our sisters for help, but was shot down by both Sweetie and Scootaloo. Sweetie was afraid of what her sister would say, and Scootaloo just wanted to keep the entire thing a secret until we could discover Patches’ story and earn our monster helper cutie marks. Patches just shrugged, seeming to go along with whatever we decided.

“It don't seem right keepin this a secret? We gotta tell somepony!” I did my best to protest. “What if the pony that hurt him is still out there, an he hurts somepony else?” The others looked worried at this. Scoots put in her brave face, while Sweetie was scared as usual, but I could read both of them well enough. They knew I was onto something.

“I don't think we need to rush into anything yet.” For a change, Scootaloo tried a reasonable approach. “As badly hurt as he was, the other pony may have been hurt just as bad or worse, and will need time to recover. That was alotta blood!” Her wings shot up like they usually did when she was worried, and she didn't bother to rein them in. I wonder how bad she would feel if she knew I could read her pegasus tells like an old gambler. My sister had taught me well after years of being friends with Rainbow Dash.

“Well either way we will most likely have to wait. We go back to school tomorrow, and I am still trying to find a way to get some of my dad’s old clothes out of my sister’s room.” Sweetie Bell chimed in, sounding like the voice of reason. It was strange how the formerly airheaded unicorn had started to become the schemer and planner of our group after a few lessons from Twilight. Maybe her egghead powers were rubbing off on our resident magic user? “If we tell anypony, i think it should be Twilight. She was the only pony that wasn't afraid of Miss Zecora, and Princess Luna. Maybe she wont be afraid of Patches here, and can help him find his memory.”

“Yea! I was thinking the same thing last night. Like when I bumped my head and my brain got all fuzzy. She can do her magic and help him remember, and stuff.” Oh great, now both of them were sounding reasonable. I was clearly doomed. Again, Patches just looked back and forth between us with his blank expression, he was truly putting himself in our hooves.

Sighing defeat, I hung my head. “Okay, fine. Tomarra after school we talk to Miss Twilight. Till then we all gotta Pinkie promise not to tell a single soul ‘bout Patches!’ I stared them down, getting a nod from all three. “So until then, we got some crusadin’ to plan, and we can use the help of our honorary crusader, Patches!” This received cheers all around, and smiles from our new friend. The teeth weren't so bad once you got used to them.


The next morning came all too soon, and I woke sore and tired. Who knew that Diamond Dogs could run so fast? It was kinda funny though when Patches bucked him through a tree, but even he had a hard time dealing with that and a manticore. Manticore tails do grow back, I hope. Despite all our adventures, not a single cutie mark was to be had, not for manticore taming, and not for diamond dog wrestling. I was pretty sure one of us would at least get a first aid cutie mark by now.

Bright and way too early I crawled down to the breakfast table, and the looks my family gave me showed no mercy. They had been up before dawn, and only the fact that I had school let me off the hook from doing chores with them. The thought of school darked my already gloomy morning, but after a good breakfast, my mood had already brightened again. Yet no matter how good I felt, the thought of school hung over me. Not that I didn't like school, mind you. Miss Cheerilee was an awesome teacher, so smart and kind, always trying to help. Learning was also fun in it’s way, as we learned new ways to expand our world, and new ideas for crusading with my friends. No, it was two fillies in particular that were the bane of my existence. Diamond Tiara, and her crony Silver Spoon, were a pair of stuck up mules that existed only to make other ponies miserable. Other ponies like me and my friends.

Arriving as agreed at the clubhouse, Sweetie Belle greeted me outside, and we entered to meet with Scootaloo, who had spent the night with Patches again. They were just finishing a meal of oats and apples, Patches looking up at our entrance looking completely silly with food all over his muzzle. You’d think he never learned to eat like a pony before. Maybe he really was a unicorn, and was used to eating with his horn all fancy-like. Celestia knows Sweetie Belle turned into a total priss about eating once she was able to use her horn. She showed off for a week straight, using her horn to move everything, until she burnt it out trying to lift three things at once. We laughed, she cried, then we all got over it, and things went back to normal. Cutie Mark Crusaders for life!

“Hey girls! I’m almost ready to go. I was just explaining to Patches that he had best stay here until we got back.” Scootaloo wiped her own messy muzzle with a hoof and grinned at us. “Last thing we need is Lily screaming about the horrors and sending everypony into a panic.”

We all giggled at the thought of Ponyville’s over-reactive mare and her screams at the slightest sign of trouble. She was as much of a drama queen as Rarity, although not nearly as fashionable. Patches merely smiled and nodded, so we all hoped he understood. I saw how spooked Scoots was at first, and she isn't afraid of anything. Or so she keeps telling us.

Soon we were off to school, waving goodbye to our new friend who waved back from the window, before stepping away into the shadows of the club house. The walk was rather uneventful as Sweetie blathered on about some new project her sister was working on, alternated with gushing and posturing from Scootaloo about whatever new stunt Rainbow Dash was working on. The promised flight lessons were of course overlooked, since they never seemed to happen. I just rolled my eyes and tried to think of the best way to introduce our friend to Ponyville. The idea of asking Twilight Sparkle seemed the best option. She was nice, smart, and didn't rush to judge everypony she met. She was the only pony that believed me about Zecora, after all.

My own thoughts were interrupted by the thing I had been dreaded the most, and all three of us came to a halt together.

“Oh look, the blank flanks made it back from spring break. It’s a shame their families couldn't stand them at home anymore.” The grating sound of Diamond Tiara’s voice erased any thoughts from my mind as I could already feel my blood beginning to boil. She always knew what to say to set me off.

“Yeah, why don't you three foals just go back home. It’s not like you’re smart enough to learn anything.” As always, a moment later Silver Spoon was there to back up her only friend.

“Or strong enough.” Diamond quipped with saccharine sweetness. “I mean what’s with those stubby little wings, anyway?”

We all looked at each other, each ready to restrain the other from going after these two parasprites, while wanting to pummel them ourselves. Exchanging glances, we all nodded in agreement, and as one, stuck our noses in the air and trotted past, pointedly ignoring the trolls as they flung more insults after us. Inside the school was hallowed ground, and we dare not start a fight, lest we be kicked out. Or even worse, they tell our families!

Once safe behind the walls of the school, the noise of our tormentors was replaces by the sweet tones of our beloved teacher, Miss Cheerilee. However, as much as we enjoyed her lessons, the boredom of academia, as well as our eagerness to return to our new friend led to a very long day. We even managed to avoid the local bullies during recess, while we discussed our plan of action. Finally, as the clock on the wall felt some small bit of mercy, the bell rang and we all bolted out of our seats. We were all halfway to the clubhouse before we were intercepted once again by the two mules that were determined to make our lives hell.

“So were you three foals hiding during recess? We missed your crying.” As usual, the torture session was led by the pink filly.

“I bet they were all crying in a corner somewhere over how pathetic they were.” The grey mare chimed in as usual.

At this point we weren’t in any mood to let the local trash ruin our mood, and started to shoulder past them, but then they mad a rather large mistake.

“What’s wrong, you three chicken? I mean, I know Scooty-poo is a chicken, but you all just run away scared.” Diamond grinned viciously.

Suddenly she had an orange muzzle in her face, as Scootaloo spun around, wings erect. “What did you just call me?”

“Chiiiikiiiin!” The pink mare drawled, while behind her crony made chicken noises behind her.

I saw where this was going and it wasn't worth it, and I caught Scootaloo’s hoof as she cocked it back for a swing. “No Scoots, she ain't worth it. Her daddy will just make you may somethin awful.”

“That’s right, you better control your little friend, before we have to go tell your parents.” She snarked.
“Oh wait, none of you have parents anymore!” Pure malice tripped from the fangs of the grey mare as they both laughed.

That was the straw, and my vision turned as red as my hair. I charged at the mule, turning expertly like my sister showed me and bucked her square in the face. I heard her glasses snap as she flew back and skidded to a stop along the road. However, I had lost the element of surprise, and the pink filly actually rose to the defense of her friend as I felt my side blossom in pain from her own bucking. Blindsided, I never saw it coming, and being a year older than me she had a bit of extra weight behind it. She may be a stuck up, prissy little mule but she was still an earth pony.

As I staggered to my hooves, my friends still stunned from the sudden confrontation, the nearby bushes exploded. With a roar, a multicolored blur rushed onto the road and charged right at the two fillies that had been tormenting us. Eyes literally glowing red, as his horn erupted in an equally sinister red glow, he stopped and lifted the two mares into the air effortlessly. Patches once again looked the part of the raging monster, teeth bared and horn aflame as he bellowed inarticulately at the two, forcing them up against a nearby tree. His sharp horn was brandished like an instrument of death as he threatened them with impalement. Needless to say, the screaming was glorious.

I shook my head of my own bloodthirsty thoughts, and actually found myself running to the rescue of my tormentors. leaping onto his back, barely missing the flaring wings, I wrapped my hooves around his broad neck. “Patches, no! We cain’t hurt em!”

Turning to glare at me with one baleful glowing eye, I shrank back in fear, my own bravery overcome by the vicious gaze. i saw my own terrified expression reflected in that massive orb, and it seemed to fill my vision with blood and death. Then just as quickly, the light went out, and the eye was orange, like my own. The horn winked out, and the two traumatized fillies were dropped to the ground in a quivering heap. I squeezed my eyes shut in fear as Patches nuzzled me gently, but opened them as I realized I was safe.

“Oh Patches, ya scart me somethin awful!” I wrapped my hooves around his head and gave him a hug.

“P-please d-don’t hurt us!” the cowed pink filly sputtered from the ground where she shared a death grip with her companion. I looked down at the pitiful mess, her perfect dress ripped by the force of the magic, and her namesake tiara now a crumpled ruin.

“We didn't know you had a monster f-for a friend. DON’T LET HIM EAT US!” Silver Spoon cried, getting an elbow from her friend. “I mean, he’s not a monster.. no he’s a nice pony, right?”

Thinking fast, I put on my most evil grin, putting a little bit of crazy into my eyes as I leaned over the neck of my new friend, looking all the world like a mad genious riding his creation into battle.

“That’s right! Patches is our new friend, and he is a very nice pony, but only if you are nice to us.” i slowly stroked the place where his mane was starting to grow out. “But if you are mean, he will have to teach you both a lesson on how to be nice to ponies.”

Nodding vigorously they both replied, “We will be nice! I promise, we won’t ever say anything mean again!”

Hugging my faithful steed again I nodded back at them. “Good. But there’s one more thing.”

Eager to escape their fate, they both nodded again. “Anything!”

“You must not tell a single living pony about what happened here. I don't care what you say about your bruises, but if you mention our friend, we will be paying you a visit. Now get lost.”

They quickly scrambled to their feet and galloped off, not even bothering to retrieve the fallen tiara and glasses. Turning around to face my friends, I laughed at the shocked look on their faces. Both mouths were hanging open, and they just stared at me and Patches.

“Y’all look like a couple of hungry birds wit yer mouths open like that. I giggled, snapping them out of their daze.

Sweetie was the first to recover, only saying “What the buck just happened?”

Scootaloo was a bit more enthusiastic yelling, “THAT. WAS. AWESOME!”

“Yea, it kinda was. Guess we got us a guardian now, don't we?” I grinned hugely.

“Hells yea! Patches and Appledoom, mule slayers extraordinaire!” Hovering off the ground, Scootaloo hopped on our friend’s back to join me, as Sweetie used her magic to climb aboard. We all laughed and Patches himself strutted as we made our way home to the club house.

This was going to be the best crusade ever!