Wheeeeeeeeeeeeew man, what a chapter! Out of the massive amount of the ones I've read so far, this one has to be my favorite, I'm liking this Batpony character, he seems really cool and I ship it! Haha!

Nice going man, nice going!

I hope you get better soon, man. I really liked these little geology buts and pieces! The K-T boundary is one of the most fascinating things about geology, I think.

She made the smallest chirp, and jabbed her hoof in my direction.

Ok, I get that Luna could have talked in Chirpese but bat ponies had to have been able to communicate with other ponies. The chirping and squeaking doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

When he’d finished, he hung his head as he held the slate up between his hooves. ‘UR pretty mare.’

Somepony thinks with their penis too much. Maybe Blackjack is in heat? I know the horse my family have got a little funny during that time of the year.

Glory is strictly mares only, but I don’t mind males like that.

I thought Glory wasn't sure what she liked.

How is it that we go from ordinary, dirty, unmagical crystals before the event to countless gemstones afterwards?

Hmmmm, so the screaming star that crashed into the ground brought magic to the world. Then later it was slammed into by another star which wiped out the zebra city. If the dream is more than just a dream. If it isn't, then why add it?

“SO! IT TAKETH HER THREE DAYS FOR TO SEEK ME.

Either this is missing a "her" or has an added "for".

She smiled slightly. “You can understand?”

Does she just not think zebra's would weaponize things? This little talk seems to hurt the idea that Fluttershy gave zebras megaspells.

activated my EFS

minor nitpick: E.F.S.

The zebra’s EFS bar

minor nitpick: E.F.S.

and though how wrong it was

thought ?

“If I can think of some way for you to help, I’ll let you know.”

A-huh, sure. Empty words? Happened in my experience.

Hmm so this is who the Stygius fellow is. Inter..est..ing. Ohhh man dunno how Glory will feel about this. That symbolism in the house though.. I have conflicted dispositions to Goldenblood but mostly hate still.

Aw hell, Steel Rangers are back and not the friendly blue-bar kind..

Steel Rain is a Harbinger... I never would've thought it.
Goldenblood's house... I never would've thought she'd find it.
Got railed by Stygius... Oh Glory won't be happy.

Damn it, I was not called upon to see this updated! Aw well might as well read this for now... I needed a break from my revisions with my Fo:E sidefic...

Step by step it… he… emerged. He was a pony like none I’d ever seen before. His hide was a dark gray and his tail a deep purple; I couldn’t see his mane under his helmet. To my shock, he had wings… but not wings like a pegasus. These wings were leathery skin--similar to a manticore’s--rather than feathered, and his large ears had prominent tufts at the ends. I’d never seen a monsterpony like this before... and I’d thought that Brass had been the last one anyway. He wore dark purple metal armor that appeared almost archaic but also quite intricate and clearly well-crafted and tended. At least that suggested he wasn’t a feral monster...

So this is the moment where the thestral/batpony Stygius comes forth eh?

Then he took off his armor and I amended one little fact: he wasn’t just a stallion… look past the freaky wings and the eyes, and there was absolutely no denying he was a damned good-looking stallion. Little apprehensive alarms began to sound along with an admiration I just been practicing earlier. I had to admit that from a purely biological standpoint, he was damned fine! Toned flanks sporting a strange heart-shaped gothic shield, strong shoulders, he was big but not too big… I shook my head hard. Okay… not the time for this!

Oh please Blackjack, there's always time for some kinky moments!

I froze as I saw him right there behind me. Neither of us blinked as he just looked at me and I stared over my shoulder at him. If he put one hoof on my flank I’d kill him. But I also really wanted him to… and I also felt horribly guilty for wanting him to… and so I just stood there as he sniffed the crazy mare. Ooookay... apparently I smelled good. I didn’t dare move, and if he touched me... oh, I really didn’t want to kill him. Except that I also really did. My brain was zigzagging all over the place; in 99 I was the one who was supposed to fill my queue, make all the moves. This was... new. He lifted his head and smiled at me with a soft nicker. He was game. Oh was he game.

Was I?

I'd say yes, you are game mate... but I can tell how things will go right now

Apparently, it was stop thinking. His lips met mine, and while I was in no condition to be kissed, another part of me came roaring to the front of my mind and with primal rage stomped every last bit of guilt from my crazy. Don’t kill him… please don’t kill him… No doubt I’d be angsting like crazy for this later, but for right now I just let it go. I kissed this strange, utterly anonymous stallion back. No doubt he’d turn out to have some sort of terrible secret or dark past or traumatized soul or… something! But right now, I had to admit he was a damned good kisser. There was just one thing…

I slugged him so hard he landed in the middle of the pool with a splash. Fortunately, he wasn’t half metal and floated there in a daze as I huffed, inventing all new colors of red. With him further away and my ardor momentarily doused, I was able to sort a few things out.

I had to admit, I’d really needed that kiss. I might have radroaches in my brain, suffer from self-destructive episodes, and be half metal… but as he pulled away, a little pony in the back of my head gave a little ‘Woot! I’m cute and good enough to get kissed by a cute guy!’ cheer and dance. I quickly backed away, feeling confused and thankful and wary all at once. He blinked at me from the middle of the pool, and I was oddly glad and at the same time alarmed to see him smiling ruefully.

Bloody called it!

He stood and trotted to his armor, then pulled out a chalkboard and a piece of chalk. He popped the latter into his mouth and wrote ‘Yes’. Just like Ditzy Doo, as I recalled. Okay, so we had communication… sort of. He erased the board with the tip of his wing and then wrote ‘Stygius’ and grinned as he tapped his chest with a hoof. “Your name?” I asked, and he nodded once.

Stygius… okay. I apparently attracted all sorts. “Okay, Stygius. My name’s Blackjack. What are you doing out here?”

So we got someone else who is all silent like Ditzy... interesting...

He looked surprised. He pointed at the radhog, then crouched and pounced the rock a few feet ahead of him, all four hooves hitting the ground at once. He swept his forehooves wide, making a popping noise with his tongue. Then he pranced along the side of the pool, fanning his wings. He stopped, covering his eyes with a hoof as he looked at me. Then he gave a broad and somewhat cocky little smile as he dipped his hoof into the pool and made a little splash. Then he kissed the air and abruptly stood upright on his hind legs, and slowly fell back till he collapsed with all four legs thrust up into the air.

“So you were out hunting, made your kill, were flying back, spotted me and… decided to flirt?” The batpony sat up, rubbing his chin, and then grinned and nodded. “You didn’t think I was a raider or… bait? Something?”

He grabbed his slate, cleaned it, then wrote, ‘Too sexy.’

I wasn’t like Glory. What had happened on the Seahorse aside, I liked sex with stallions. A lot. I’d always looked forward to my turn on the queue. Even Vanity’s memory orb had been fun; had it been viewed in private, I probably would have had a new toy.

Stygius interrupted my thoughts by pointing at me and then bumping his forehooves together and giving a pointed look. I flushed, but aside from that nagging panic in the back of my mind... it wasn’t an entirely unpleasant proposition.

“Maybe,” I said, making him grin. “But not right now.” From the look on Stygius’s face, though, he’d follow me through a fire for a chance at my hind end.

Stallions...

On one hoof, he was handsome and fit. He hadn’t tried to force himself on me, but he was keenly interested. On another, I had no idea who he really was or what he really wanted. I couldn’t treat him as a Stable 99 stallion and just rut him because I wanted to. Besides, even if he had been relatively gallant since we’d met, he might still have an ulterior motive. On another, it would be nice to get a little play. It’d been so long since Tenpony, and since my last decent stallion -- U-18, five months ago -- that a pony ride sounded nice. But still, on the other other rear hoof, I really wasn’t sure if I should wait till I was with Glory or not. Though as fun and wonderful and dear as she was, she wasn’t a stallion. There just wasn’t any getting around that.

'Kay good thing I decided to read up this, going to need to edit the chapter where my OC meets Blackjack during the dinner party with Littlepip... They did not go through it, but I'd rather stick to canon and not ruin it elsewhere...

I smiled and patted his shoulder. Then I trotted for the stairs; we hadn’t checked the second floor rooms yet. I got up them and into a bathroom and was closing the door as it hit me. My legs couldn’t shake, my heart couldn’t race, and my breathing wouldn’t gasp, but I could at least sink to the floor next to the toilet and cry as something snapped inside me. It wasn’t painful. Quite the opposite. I pressed my face into a fuzzy pink floor mat as that hideous, suspicious beast inside me roared in pain from the wound inflicted by a simple kiss. My tears were of relief. I’d kissed him and not killed him. He’d liked it… liked me.

For the first time in a very long time, I felt like Blackjack the mare. Maybe a little wiser, but still Blackjack. Not Blackjack the cyberpony nor Security the madmare of Hoofington. Just Blackjack. Who knew a little normalcy could feel so good?

Well, looks like Blackjack's mind is slowly recovering... let's see how well this goes from here on out

And when he entered me, it was all I could to keep myself together. My legs could remember the feeling of the nails, my nethers and throat the burning pain and humiliation. This wasn’t that. He wasn’t them. I was safe. I was in control of myself. And while every second a part of me screamed to get him out before he started hurting me, to rip and tear and kill… I suppressed it. I refused to allow it to set me off as he pressed above me and moved inside me. He huffed as he increased speed and I tensed. He slowed, and I relaxed.

Before too long he made a series of squeaks and I felt hot wetness inside me. Of course, I was nowhere near climaxing myself, but that wasn’t the point. This was about me being able to do this and put what’d been done to me behind me. And as he squirted, I had one more fierce impulse to rip the invading member off. Then his lips met my ears and neck and like that, the impulse was gone. I’d been ploughed badly, but none of them had shown the slightest affection.

I finally collapsed on the bed as he withdrew, an oddly depressing sensation. I crawled the rest of the way onto it, and he moved beside me, his brows furrowing and his eyes concerned. He reached for the chalkboard and wrote ‘Good?’, holding it between his hooves as he looked at me.

Poor stallion deserved better than me hugging him fiercely and sobbing as that murderous impulse broke apart and flowed out my eyes. “Really good, Styggie. Really… really really good…” I blubbered as I curled up against him and let him hold me and curl his wings about me. He might have looked completely confused and worried, but right now he knew exactly what I needed.

Well looks like her mind resisted the temptation and is truly slowly recovering... by intercourse... why do I find that hilarious?

When I finally pulled myself together and wiped my nose and eyes, he kissed my horn and then started to pull away. I reached out with my magic for a very specific part of him and froze him in his tracks. “Where do you think you’re going?” I asked with a tiny smile. His eyes grew wide again as I gave a careful tug and leaned forward to kiss him again. “We’ve only just started…”

I knew she was going for that...

“Then help me. Please. If the zebras get their hooves on megaspells, the war will have to stop. If the zebras and ponies both know that battles are pointless, they’ll have to negotiate. Right?” she said with a wide, hopeful, and horribly naïve smile. “I can’t just… just sit on this. I need to do something too.” She smiled slightly. “You can understand?”

As much as I love you Flutters, you are being dense here! This will not help them in the long run or help to negotiations, it will only escalate the war to new levels like what Goldenblood said!

Lying here, right now, I wasn’t laughing. I was thinking. Did I want to have a child? Here, in the Wasteland? In Hoofington? Now? Okay, maybe not here nor now. Maybe if I could scrape together a few thousand caps and set myself up in Tenpony. Have a filly or colt in nice safe medical conditions. Give them a few years and teach them how to shoot and take care of themselves.

Have a family. A real family, something more than life in 99. I did want that. Given everything that had happened to me, despite it all, I wanted a kid. Kids. Plural. When I was done with EC-1101, I could go back to Spike and do everything to get Gardens to work. Clean up Equestria. Have a kid. Or two. Or three. Hee…

Okay, I think this is a coincidence with my protagonist... I've never even read PH until now and he's goes through this as well albeit later chapters when he ponders upon intimacy... just wow with the coincidences...

I rolled onto my side and snuggled against Stygius. He was warm, firm, and didn’t mind metal legs. I knew I’d be guilting about feeling this way sooner or later but for now, nuzzling his neck, I really couldn’t help but smile. Glory would like him. Not like-like, of course. But he had a gallant idiot streak I bet she could really relate to. Kissing along his chin and cheek, I moved my hoof downward. A few seconds later, his eyes popped wide as his cheeks went red. I gave his nose a little lick as he gave a meek chirp.

Round four…

Oh my...

Okay. Okay. Enough. There was getting over a bad ploughing, then there was having fun, and then there was just wallowing in it. I wasn’t over Seahorse, but Stygius had helped me get past it. I could do things and be around a stallion without my brain screaming that they were going to rape me. When I saw Glory next, I was going to make her hooves curl! As I finally slipped off the bed, I was sore and tingly in all the right places. Stygius… he’d need a little more time to recover, but from the grin on his face I was pretty sure he’d be fine.

Stallions… are… awesome!

She has gone off the sugar rush on the sex category isn't she?

I stared at him sitting there. Then he muttered to himself in a voice so low that I nearly missed it. His words, however, made my blood turn to ice. “Damn it... Don’t make me kill you, Celestia.”

...........................What?

I stood with a groan and gave myself a good shake, trying to wrap my head around what I’d seen. Kill Celestia? Could anypony do that? I mean, the zebras had, but they’d had their entire war effort to use, and even then they were only able to do it as part of the apocalypse. Goldenblood might have been a sneaky bastard, but he couldn’t do that!

Could he?

The discovery of the camera in the library spurred me to search for others, and we spent nearly an hour looking. There turned out to be at least one in every room, and Stygius was kind enough to, flapping as hard as he could, lift me up to the point where I could see more recordings. None of them were as grave as the one I’d seen in the library, though. Threatening Princess Celestia… that was just… how could he – could anypony – think that?

I have to agree with Blackjack here and again... What?

In the nursery, though, I found a recording I’d never imagined. Goldenblood was slumped against the empty crib, weeping as if it were the first time he would and the last time he could. He clenched his teeth along with his eyes, hissing as if he were being tortured as he sobbed and choked.

“Here you are,” a strange stallion said in a reverent tone. It was a blue unicorn wearing a pince-nez. His mane was a luxurious silver-white, and on his flank was a model of an atom like the drawings I’d seen in textbooks. “It’s been three days.”

Goldenblood turned and looked at him over his shoulder with a blood shot eye. “Am I not permitted to grieve the loss of my daughter, Trottenheimer?” he hissed.

“That requires you to acknowledge that you ever had one,” the blue stallion replied. “Four Leaf put two and two together. Don’t worry, it won’t spread. The M.o.P. is rallying around Fluttershy to protect her. She wants you to come to dinner. No arguments.” He watched as Goldenblood pressed his brow to the crib again. “Sometimes I think you’re trying to commit suicide by overdosing on secrets. It wasn’t your fault.”

He made another horrible choking sound. At first I thought it was more tears, but then he threw back his head and I saw his sick grin. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he laughed. Trottenheimer’s eyes widened in shock as the scarred stallion rasped, “That’s just it. It is all my fault...”

“What?”

“Fluttershy and I were together intimately,” he said as he sat, gazing into the empty crib. “In the heat of the moment... I... called out the name of another mare.”

The blue unicorn screwed back his lips in distaste as he scowled, and then he sighed in disappointment. “Goldenblood, really?”

“I know. I know!” he hissed in a rush. “There isn’t one part of that stupid thing I haven’t analyzed in detail! I don’t know why I said it. But I did, and... it was at the worst possible time. She’s so terribly sensitive... She’d already had complications... the stress... the pressure... all of it was too much to bear. She left me... then six hours later I got the call...” He started to laugh, but three laughs into it they transformed into ragged sobs. “Ministry Mare Fluttershy admitted to Fluttershy Medical Center for a miscarriage...” And he buried his face in the crib. “I didn’t just lose the mare I loved, Trottenheimer. I killed my daughter with a name!”

Had he known that his and Flutters' daughter was still alive, I can see him acting differently but still, poor Goldie

You never forgot guns like those.

Steel Rain was here.

Well we are fucked!

Okay with this one out of the way, I can get to the other chapter... goodness though this is something else...

He erased it and then wrote, ‘She mad.’

Never leave Stygius never leave us.

“Maybe,” I said, making him grin. “But not right now.” From the look on Stygius’s face, though, he’d follow me through a fire for a chance at my hind end.
Stallions...

Damn right!

I supposed I should have been grateful he wasn’t a cyber-ghoul-batpony with a mysterious agenda.

*Deep gravely voice* He is batpony!

Dammit, Somber, you told me this was a turning point for most readers and got me all scared for nothing. D: Granted, I would have been perfectly happy reading a million-plus words without any goddamn batponies, but this was, if not as amazing as 43 or even 42, definitely in the same league as them. That said...

GODDAMMIT, BLACKJACK, DON'T FUCK THE BATPONY DX

She fucked the batpony. >:B And this really bothered me because the whole time, I was thinking, "What would Glory think?" It wasn't until after her final inner monologue about life at her Stable that I realized, BJ really doesn't know better. This is not the first time she's cheated on Glory, but quite frankly, it's because thanks to her upbringing, she has no inclination to think that anyone's feelings would be hurt, let alone know that she needs to talk to Glory about stuff like this first. I sincerely hope this comes back to bite her in the ass later, but also that it doesn't cause her too much grief. I would point to this sequence as a good example of how not to do polyamory (a topic I have precisely zero understanding of), but at least it's in character for her.

Meanwhile, the combination of "I need to not let the rape control me", "I want to feel like not a robot" and "am I actually bisexual?" is a good way to justify having even non-explicit sex in a story like this, so well done.

Other thoughts. "Goldenblood the pony" was interesting. Not entirely sympathetic, but at least the look into his past was enlightening. (Also I note he used to be an artist, just like Hitler. :V) The high school AU was the best thing, especially the filly Rampage. :D Your version of Littlehorn is considerably better than the one story I read on the topic not too long ago. I'm having a hard time understanding the importance of the Cake twins. We know Psychoshy's "real" name! (I hope Blackjack teases her about finding her diapers.) And for all that I really wanted to argue with Goldenblood in that final scene of his (because I'm a die-hard sunlover), he's absolutely right about Celestia, and we know where that blame lies. :V

So, I'm excited for chapter 45. It is, I believe, where this story had published to when I started reading it. But more importantly, I voice the villain! :D And I just cannot wait to see what VisualPony did with what I sent him.

girl brains are hard...

Amen to that! I actually quite liked this chapter and Stygius. Poor dude's way out of his depth. But yeah, this is going to have some ramifications later on...

Hmm, haven't commented in a few chapters...

I feel oddly vindicated that Goldenblood's Gary Stu-ness continues unabated, confirming my initial, scathing opinion... slowly but surely the entire cast comes to love, fear, or respect him in some combination. Fear not, Blackjack... I'll always deride him for being what he is; it's okay if you pity him. I know you can't help it; you're too close to the problem to see it properly. Seriously.... planning to kill Celestia... that got a good eye roll out of me. What was worse was the utter scorn he showed her in that exchange. Sorry, but how many centuries of peace did she give your world? That counts for something, but I guess those Blueblood genes are really showing through.
Hey, I'm fine with the afterlife being a happy, harmonious place of singing stars. There's nothing you can do in a finite lifespan to justify infinite torment, really. But for even thinking about killing Celestia... yep, I'm fine and dandy with his daughter being a psychotic bitch that he never got to meet, Fluttershy's scorn, and anything else bad that happens to him. I don't think he's going to live long enough to suffer properly, but ya can't have everything.

On to better topics (i.e. pretty much anything else). I actually really like Horse as a character. My kinda villain... unapologetically crass, fearlessly corrupt, and most importantly entertaining. That Sweetie Bot is a bit disturbing... but it's exactly the kind of thing that characterizes his sort of sleaziness. He doesn't seem to have that 'oh, shit, start the car!' cowardice that Flim and Flam display. Maybe I just like him because he doesn't seem as wowed by the Golden Boy. ...Nah, it's the lingerie Sweetie Bot... I got issues.
Stygius is... well how do you not like the goof, really? I can see this being drama fuel later but it won't be any real fault of his. I could do with his grammar being a bit better. Sometimes it's cute, but it also puts me in the mind of reading kids writing on the internet... poorly. Ah well.
Let's see... lot of ground in these last few chapters.... thanks ever so much for dragging us through the rape scene again, though I suppose it was inevitable. That whole chapter was an interesting trip, but I wonder how long it'll hold before she breaks down again. It's such a pattern with her that even she recognizes it. Hopefully getting back to the others will continue to help her come to terms with things... before she has more things to come to terms with. It'd certainly help me... I miss those crazy kids!

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Where Stygius is concerned, hoo boy. The reaction there was basically Flash Sentry, only Flash didn't exist yet. Felt like the same thing, based on the same or similar perceived issues (if I remember right, I'd judge the reaction as being higher Stu but lower lack-of-characterization than Flash), but in just this one little corner of Pony rather than front and center, and during a hiatus at that. Never had that much of an issue with him myself, despite not liking Flash or his introduction.

I sense more emotional fallout for Blackjack in the coming chapters

Well i am proud of her to overcome that many problems in such a short time and not kill the poor stallion.. but i sense more immanent doom in the near future :(

This was a super fun chapter. Awkward batpony shenanigans and self-doubt and tons of other crazy stuff... then the banging. Nice to see that BJ could get passed that experience to continue experiencing good things. Stygius is a seriously lucky and devoted bat. Following a mare for who knows how long into who knows what, all for the chance of getting some of that ass. Devotion. Hell, I think I'd do it too.

~SolidFire

congrats to Stygius for getting banged and to Blackjack for being able to control herself the whole time.

I feel like, with the exception of Book 1 and a bit of Book 2, this story makes all its important characters immediately likeable, even before there is anything to know about them. I liked Stygius a lot right from the getgo, as did I like Fluttershy, Crunchy Carrots, Boo, etc.

7186362 Someone stole the words out of my mouth, 35-ish weeks before I had them. :'(

Oh well... :\ VisualPony? Would that be something on YouTube? If not, where would I find it? >.<

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Yeah, just search for VisualPony on Youtube, you'll find his channel. :)

Ha, finally a batpony! A good bat at that. Please don't kill him too horribly, don't kill him at all in fact, let him be happy plz plz plzplzplzplz...

I have a feeling goldenblood's magic power is never really fully expanded on....makes me wonder just how strong he is when The thing in the darkness place happens and The golden pony is released by the executioner thing and becomes a good pony again (sorta)

Maybe he really could kill ol' sunbutt

Its stunning just how much power and influence Goldenblood actually had.
Terrifying, even.
The power to make virtually anything happen, to achieve any outcome...
...and the will to use it.

That's what really makes him dangerous, is hai will to use his power separate from his feelings.

Now what I what to know: how could he see Blackjack when he's in the past?

And did Twilight ever make 32 hour days?
Dear Faust. 24 hours is already too much!

Ok so I'm only a little bit into the chapter but I just wanted to say something, I do not like cheating, the fact that she's even considering cheating on Glory is pretty upsetting to me

8231705
Wait till you see how Glory feels about it.

I like Stygius. I DON'T like his one track mind, but he is endearing all the same.
-
Goldenblood... what am I supposed to think of you? Honest, caring, intelligent. After the attack, mysterious, mercyless, driven. Does everything he can to give Fluttershy the world, but is not above contemplating the murder of his once beloved ruler. Do I despise you, or respect you? Pity or disdain? Hmmm...

Blackjack's going to be pregnant...ain't she?
That'll bring a whole new level of complication, and mindbuckery.

Other story… Nightmare Moon and Luna made us into Batponies with magic. Turn pegasus pony into batpony. Not know what she did with unicorns and earth ponies. Maybe only need batponies? Dunno. Now we live in caves and fly out at night. Hard to meet pretty mare who isnt family in castle. Very hard. Soooooooooooo hard. Sister think I am dumb for following you cause your pretty but you are with your shiny legs and tight flank and striped mane and your eyes glow and your…

i've read several fan-stories about where Batponies came from...i think the silliest one was one where they were created by accident because of a defective magic potion that was simply supposed to help ponies see in the dark!
i think that was called "Bat and Bug". that story involves a batpony and a Changeling becoming friends.

He grabbed his slate, cleaned it, then wrote, ‘Too sexy.’

Oh. My. God. I almost fell off my bed laughing at this that's a first for a stallion to flirt with blackjack and think shes sexy, even with cyber legs lol

As someone who has been cheated on, I find Blackjack's actions in this chapter a bit difficult to forgive.

9610952
Stable 99 life is simply different. They didn't comprehend monogamy. Everything was shared - even males.
The sex slavery is a little harder to forgive really.

9873419
Going further, the cases Blackjack knew that were closer to/looking for monogamy (the Overmare and Duct Tape with P-21, in different ways of course) were fairly messed up in ways distinct from the general reality of 99.

Wow. Good on Blackjack for being able to overcome her trauma and not let her rapists win in her mind.

I'll admit, I teared up when she started sobbing after they had finished. I can't even begin to imagine the relief and catharsis she feels at being able to enjoy herself and not let those fuckers control her anymore. I felt proud of her. Wonderfully written, that scene was.

Besides that, I love Stygius, he's very goofy and exactly what Blackjack needed at that moment in time. I don't feel like she necessarily cheated on Glory here because Blackjack has no concept of monogamy, as others have pointed out. And even though I despise Cheaters, I'm not gonna fault her for that, because that's just how Stable 99 was. But I shall see Glory's reaction soon enough I suppose.

The bits with Goldenblood were quite interesting, he's a very intriguing character. And giving him a bit more equinity in this chapter was definitely welcome. Can't wait to see what else I'll learn about him.

And holy fuck, it's Steel Rain. Why here? Why now?

*sighs*
*looks at the chapter*
*takes a deep breath*

I apologize in advance, because this is going to be another very harsh critic. Probably just should’ve skipped writing a comment and move on to the next chapter. But I had to get his off my chest.

How do I put this? Well, in my very personal opinion this chapter is far worse than the last one. It’s probably the worst one of the entire story so far. I liked Lucidity for the most part until the Boing stuff. This chapter was off to a bad start and got constantly worse.

Small positive note: Blackjack actually being able to mercy kill the injured Seeker was a nice surprise. Her learning that sometimes a quick death is the best she can do is good character development. Also, I’ve a strong feeling that this random Zebras is going to show up again and be a very important character.

And that was the last positive think I’m going to say for a while. If you don’t want to see me ranting and rambling this is the last chance to stop reading. You've been warned.

So, Blackjack is suddenly very thirsty for stallion dicks, which is a problem because she’s in the middle of nowhere. But lo and behold, a wild stallion appears. Said stallion is immediately smitten by Blackjack and wants to fuck her right here and there. He’s also a bat pony, a new species of ponies we haven’t seen before. But that doesn’t really matter because he’s here to fuck Blackjack, giving us more lore about bat ponies is only secondary.

And the reason it had to be a bat pony and not just any other random Wastelander is because… shut up!

So, the bat pony acts totally not creepy by sniffing Blackjack and trying to kiss her. Which is supposed to be cute. I, however, don’t see much difference between him and Candlewick two chapters earlier. Except that Candlewick was an actual character, of course.

Blackjack, understandably, throws him into a pool but now he really wants to come along. You see, he’s really horny he thinks she’s cute and that's all the reason he needs. Top notch character motivation. Then his sister shows up, trying to convince him not follow his strange mare he just met and knows nothing about. Of course, our horny bat has no common sense and still insists on following Blackjack. Because there’s no way that a stranger in the Wasteland could be dangerous or anything. At which point his sister just gives up. I mean she tried really hard to change his mind for about a half-a-minute or so. What more can you expect? *

(*I really hope the next chapter reveals that she secretly followed them and not just letting her brother wander off with a stranger.)

Luckily for our Horny Bat Pony Blackjack isn’t a slaver who is going to sell him to a brothel as exotic attraction and eventually they discover strange building in pristine pre-war condition that was once owned by Goldenblood. But oh no, they get attacked by evil muderbots and have to hide inside the building. Now they're stuck and can't get out. I don’t blame your for thinking “Wow this sounds awfully lot like the plot of your average Clopfic.” because that was my thought exactly. To the story’s credit: They didn’t start fucking immediately. To the story’s discredit: They did fuck eventually and did so on Goldenblood’s bed.

At this point the whole chapter felt more like a Clopfic based on PH than an actual chapter of the story: Blackjack meets new character, they immediately have the hots for each other and then they fuck. It doesn’t help that the sex scene between Blackjack and Stygius was describe in far greater details that almost every other sex scene except the rape on the Seahorse. The bondage sex between Blackjack and Glory? Mostly glossed over and done after a few sentences. The hawt lesbian foursome in Tenpony? Happened off-screen. But this the story goes to great lengths to describe how they're doing it and how great it feels.

And Stygius is not even a character, he’s just a plot device. Blackjack wants to fuck a stallion and here’s a stallion for her the fuck with the barest amount of personality. Blackjack tells him she killed a foal by accident? He just shrugs, like it's no big deal. Blackjack says that she’s a deeply traumatized mare who may snap during the sex and kill him? That’s okay, because she’s cute. Guess at least he won't die as a virgin.

But hey there’s more than just sex in this chapter, right? Well, yes. The good news is that we also get a few more flashbacks about Goldenblood. The bad news is that we also get a few more flashbacks about Goldenblood.

In one flashback Goldenblood laments about whether he should try to save Equestria or just let it die before his friend/assistant convinces him that he should save Equestria. Because he’s the most important character in the world and without him Luna would be utterly lost. All the other nobles? Utterly corrupt and incompetent! Luna actually finding competent non-noble advisors? Impossible! Only Goldenblood has the wisdom to save the country.

In the next flashback we learn that Goldenblood was completely aware of Fluttershy trying to give the knowledge of the mega spells to the Zebras and sabotaged several of her attempts to do so. Because he’s the most competent character in the world and the only one smart enough to know that the Zebras would turn them into weapons. He’s Goldenblood and he’s always right and always predicts accurately what will happen. And to really show what a great character he is, he comes up with a far better plan than Fluttershy to make sure the right Zebras will get the mega spells and not turn them into weapons. Because, fuck you Fluttershy! How dare you to be competent when Goldenblood is around?

This is followed by another flashback where an angry Celestia shows up in Goldenblood’s house, only for Goldenblood to tell her how much she sucks and screwed up. Because he’s the bestest character in the whole universe and don’t you just love it when the OC is always right and calls out all the beloved show characters on their flaws? The Mary Sue vibes I got from Goldenblood in this chapter were extremely strong. Spike acting like his personal groupie earlier was bad enough, but this is even worse.

Then, finally we see a vulnerable Goldenbold who doesn’t know that his daughter is still alive. A Goldenblood who's manipulated instead of being the manipulator. But at this point it’s too little too late. Don’t you just feel sad for poor Goldenblood. Because he’s the saddest character in the world and really misses his baby daughter?

The chapter then ends with a surprise appearance from Steel Rain, who will hopefully kill Stygius and save me from another chapter full of pointless Cyberpony on Bat Pony action.

I wish this chapter had an actual plot and wasn’t just about Blackjack fucking a random Bat Pony. I wish Stygius was a character with actual depth and a better motivation for joining her and not just a plot device that popped-up because Blackjack needed a stallion to fuck. I wish the story had come up with a better way for Blackjack to overcome her trauma. I wish this chapter had actually done what PH does best and give us a huge ton of bat pony lore instead of being “lol random bat ponies”. I wish the story would stop shilling Goldenblood as this super awesome, smart guy who makes the characters from the show look like idiots.

But sometimes you don’t get what you wish for. So you just continue onwards to the next chapter and hope that it’s more to your liking.

Ok I’m almost done with Chapter 45 and it hasn’t really improved my opinion of Stygius. On the contrary, I not want him to die or just leave and never appear again. He’s such a shallow character with no good motivation.

But since my last comment was harsh, I would like to make a few suggestions how to improve Stygius und Chapter 44 in general. Feel free to disagree.

• The part where Blackjack was daydreaming about stallions should’ve happened before she arrived at the pool. If some time had passed between this and Stygius appearance it would’ve felt more natural and less like Blackjack can summon stallions when being horny.
• At the first meeting don’t have him act like he’s starring in a clopfic. No casual jumping in the pool, no creepy attempt at kissing her, no sniffing. In fact, his sister should be there right from the start. She could be distrustful of the unknown Cyberpony they just came across while Stygius is more welcoming, even offering pieces of the radhog. He could still start at Blackjack and blush, thinking she’s really pretty, but don’t make their first interaction all about them being horny. Establish him as a character first, especially if he’s supposed to stick around for longer.
• Maybe have the argument between Stygius and his sister get more intense. Stygius could ask where Blackjack is heading and then offer to accompany her. His sister thinks that’s not a good idea and things escalate until the sister leaves in frustration. Blackjack probably would feel bad about this, but Stygius could reassure her that they argue a lot. Maybe even have him strike his heroic pose then, to show that he’s well-meaning but a bit of a dork.
• The trip to Goldenblood’s house would be used for them to get to know each other. Maybe have Blackjack ask Stygius about his home and family. The flirting increase and Stygius admits that he think’s Blackjack is really, really pretty. Maybe have Blackjack bring up what happened at the Seahorse at his point. But have her keep the death kid to herself.
• Once the are inside the house, slowly ramp up the flirting and then have it result in the sex. But keep it short. This isn’t a Clopfic and we don’t need to hear in great lengths how much Blackjack needed this, how good Stygius’ performance was or how many times they did it.
• Also cut the scene where Goldenblood is calling out Celestia. Goldenblood has some very valid points but it just makes him look even more like he’s the perfect character who’s better than everypony else. There’s not really anything in the flashback that is really needed and there are no new information for the reader. Except Goldenblood being the one who’s isolating Twilight form Celestia. Which again, only makes him look more like a Mary Sue.

Now all this is just my personal preferences, but maybe it helps to understand why I feel this chapter was lackluster.

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So here's the nuts and bolts behind this chapter. Blackjack has a problem. Lucidity pointed out she has a problem. It's a growing problem that ends with her either becoming a maniac that's put down by her friends or a sucidee. Part of the problem is that several stallions hurt her badly. Sex is important to Blackjack. It's one of her four corners of her identity. Sex is good when its consensual for all parties involved. She is an "ethical slut" if you like TVTropes. Sex is how she resets after trauma hits her hard. It's not the best coping mechanism, but it is a mechanism. Only it was damaged by Black. So she's got to take it back. Now Stygius might have been abrupt, but there's reasons. It has to do with that completely ordinary mountain next to them that has no special significance what so ever. Now I could have fleshed him out over the chapter and then have them bang, but at that point in the story it would have zoomed everything off in that direction. 'What, there's Bat Ponies where doing what?!" And her dealing with controlling her reflexes and reaction from her trauma would have fallen by the wayside. Now I could have had him not tell her. But then THAT becomes the focus. What is he hiding. Why? Again, not dealing with the problem. So literally his penis and blackjack not killing him for wanting to use it is the point. Because Blackjack needs some agency in her life and taking back control over her reflexes to splatter a stallion is a big part of that.

Could I have used a not-batpony? Sure. I guess. but that would have been even more of a throwaway character. At least Stygius has a reason to be there. I was also limited with their hypersonic speech. I wanted the information he could put on the slate so he can say things but not give dissertations.

Now, for the other half with Goldenblood. Can you please tell me how Fluttershy could get megaspell secrets to the zebras without getting caught and executed for wartime treason? Because I can't think of one. This would be the equivalent of Oppenheimer giving the nuke to the Germans. That data is protected. It is a big deal. There are receipts. I accept Fluttershy might get them to the zebras, but I do not accept she could do it without getting caught and punished. Goldenblood knows people that can do the thing that Fluttershy wants to do. And pay close attention: It was the WRONG THING. He enabled her to do a thing that kills millions because he still cared for her. What he should have done was put her under house arrest till the end of the war. But he screwed up. He screws up CONSTANTLY. For all his supposed perfection, he loses it all because he loves the wrong thing and kept the wrong secrets.

As for the Celestia scene, it's why the peace attempt was made at Broken Hoof. Because no where in FoE was there an explanation for WHY Luna would permit her sister to have a peace conference in the middle of a war. Something like that would completely undermine her executive authority. Celestia was given a you-suck speech by Goldenblood, and Celestia decides to go and do the peace accord. Something she should have done BEFORE abdicating. Even if it was unconditional surrender, she should have done it before handing the absolute mess she allowed to start to somepony else. It's also an explanation for why Celestia never interacted with Twilight in FoE. She was deliberately cut out. Luna needed her out, and so she was out. That's just how the game is played. Even seeking a peace accord would be an admittance of failure for Luna. Celestia endangered not only her government but five years of her rule. It was big sis Celestia taking over again because she could. Luna's worst nightmare.

“Sorry?” The blue pegasus looked over his shoulder back at me with a wry smile. “Girl, you don’t got nothing to be sorry for. Young unicorn mare like yourself helpin’ refugees like that… jumpin’ in to stop the firing? Getting the whole damn school to help, regardless of what that damned nag said? Girl, I think when Princess Celestia hears about this, and word gets back to the zebras, the war will be over. Y’all might have just saved Equestria.” The feeling of dread lifted as we soared higher and higher into the clouds.

Little horn. Glad we got some type of written story about it. Now I'm sitting here wondering how much of it was true. We know that they were refugees but one of them fought back in self defense but that didn't seem like it happened. Could it be that this was right before the assassin decided to get his revenge on his fallen brethren and family or is it an altered version to satiate Blackjack's need for heroism?

Man I love Stygius, he's just a horny dude thatll literally go through hell and back to get some ass. Glad she actually got over her trauma on Seahorse I would hate to see Blackjack lose her composer at an important time just because of her past trauma. I'm also loving more backstory on Goldenblood.