• Member Since 3rd Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Dec 1st, 2023

Diceman


Comments ( 56 )

what the hell?

475313

?is something wrong?

Thats nice, 3 votedowns already and no reasons >>. adorable

475334 i know how you feel, it makes no sense , i once had another fic (sunset and people voted it down without reason[took it down]) i know the feeling :twilightangry2:

People will oft downvote stories that appear to be sex for the sake of sex. I'll take a read though, see if there's anything else wrong that might be doing it.

Edit: Alright, from a quick skim it seems your spelling is fine, as is your grammar-- for the most part. You should probably go back and look over your punctuation, as there are a lot of places where there should be commas or periods. That particular error is especially prevalent near where you have dialogue or thoughts, but there's also some places where you need to add a comma or period to break up the sentence. When you're writing, your best bet is to speak aloud what you've just written. Listen for the natural pauses, and make sure you have commas in those places.

That's all there is superficially, really, and while it might not be stellar you've done a much better job than many of the posted fics here. I'll edit again when I've had time to properly read the whole thing so I can give feedback on the story in and of itself.

No.

I hate ship-fics. Nobody likes them as much as one would think.

Unless they are extremely well done, otherwise... It's futile to make one.

475352

thank you for your input. It may seem like a excuse but when I try pre-reading my own stuff it kinda gets all mixed together in a swarm of words. Dyslexia can be a absolute bitch to deal with sometimes. Not really a excuse but I really wish I had a editor :p

Haha, hilarious at parts, overall a good fic, it deserves likes instead os dislkes

475418

Even if only 1 person likes it then all the effort was worth it. That's how I roll :p

475422 Yes I too roll this way. Also, I enjoyed this, have a like! :pinkiecrazy:

475354 if you hate ship fics, then why are you even commenting? There are plenty of better things to do with your life than insulting someone's choice of story. Also, in case you haven't noticed, plenty of people enjoy shipping stories, even in other fandoms. Just because you dislike something does not mean everyone hates it the way you do.

If you think the story isn't written well, then try providing some constructive criticism instead of being rude. Even if you don't have suggestions to fix the problems in a story, pointing out where the author fell short can still help him/her improve.

Every piece of writing is practice for an author. One must write in order to improve. Not every story has to be a masterpiece to be worth writing.

475503

Took the words right out of my mouth. you just got another follower for being my hero :p

Man, I don't care if it's a ship-fic, I think it was actually pretty well done.

Besides, how often do you see stories that have a Twifire pairing?

hummm Ill give it a try even tho all this clop is starting to get redundant but yours actually has a story I will give it a chance

475410 Just ask for one. There are plenty of people who are good with that sort of thing and have nothing better to do with their time. I'd offer, but I'm already slow on pre-reading for someone due to schoolwork.

Saw cover pic
LOL'd

475354
You sir are wrong.

Just because you don't like Shipping doesn't mean others don't as well.
Shipping is a very large part of this community.

Don't let these trolls get to you, Diceman. This story is okay.

475524 :rainbowlaugh:

475521 The attention is much appreciated. Hopefully I can keep you entertained.

I liked it. Haters gonna Hate. Don't take it to heart! Have a smile thingie. :pinkiehappy: (◠‿◠✿)

Ummmm..... That was actually a little Funny. I really liked the end.

475642 then why'd you comment?:ajbemused:

EXCELLENT STORY! I GIVE THIS A B:twilightsmile:

That pic.....................................:heart:

I am not quite sure why, but clop and ship fics entertain me greatly, now if only I had some kind of awesome picture to demonstrate how awesome I think you are.

478795

Your happiness is all I require

The ending made me lawl.

Have to say that I really liked it. Spitfire is probably my favorite pony outside of the mane 6 so maybe I am a bit biased. But I digress it was a great story and I literally lol'd at the end. If you need an editor you just found one!:rainbowdetermined2:

My face when the ending:rainbowlaugh:
Thumbs up for comedy.

Hm it appears mr.error404 had a 404 error and shut down suddenly, not able to elaborate on his "what the hell". LOL
Yeah Diceman, you have a very colorful imagination. Very sexy story. I dont normally read these sort of fics, but I sure did enjoy the mental picture this one painted for me. Obviously princess Luna enjoyed it too

526628

Stay tuned then, I have Zecora x Fluttershy coming out from Candle Eyes request

Hopefully I'm not the only one who was disappointed that full power twilight was over taken so easilly but over all it was pretty good

Ooooh loved the funny ending and even little twilight going a bit loco.

But maybe the story could have offered a good reason for Spitfire being in ponyvile. I know you went for the your suddenedly in the middle of the story beginning. I just can't help the idea that if Spitfire would be in ponyvile Rainbow would have been all over her :rainbowwild:(figuratively speaking, ofcourse).

Keep it up and remember, Tolerate & love the shit outta them!

610499

There was a story before this titled "Bonfire" which explains why shes in Ponyville. you can find said story http://www.fimfiction.net/story/17845/Bonfire <---here

ooooh good more reading!!

ponychan.net/chan/files/src/132434205267.jpg


But seriously, pretty good. Some minor mistakes here and there, but it's well written enough and really hot. Though I kinda wanted Twilight to break both of them. :3 :twilightsheepish:

This is how I felt about luna :facehoof:

im sayinf this now, the ending line made me fall off my bed laughing so hard:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

While it was slightly nonsensical, it was quite sexy. I enjoyed it, but in a bad way. :trollestia:

THAT FUCKING ENDING

Cool story, bro. Tell it again. :twilightsmile: It always amuses me to no end when someone assumes that just because they don't like something, it must be true for everyone else as well. Ignore comments to that effect and write on, brother (or sister as the case may be).

The writing itself was pretty good, only a few grammatical mistakes really bothering me.

I can see some of your juices dripping on the floor and your face is beat red.

Should be beet red.

"Well Twilight, the candy you ate has two negative effects, one of them drives you sex crazy at forty five minutes and the other can kill you by ripping yourself apart from the inside out.

Did you mean to say for forty five minutes? Also, comma after the highlighted portion.

Should of seen her trying to walk afterwards, I don't think she will ever be able to walk right again, not after having Big Macintosh's tree trunk sized thing in her.

Change that to "Should have". Also, change that first comma to a period while we're at it.

There were some others, but it was these three that stuck out at me the most. All in all, however, it was an enjoyable story, and wouldn't mind seeing Twilight and Spitfire continuing their relationship. Always nice to see someone else's take on it. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Spitfire_lazy.png

Writing a letter to your teacher about how you lost your virginity makes about as much sense as declaring that your bisexual on facebook.............Wait a second.
:facehoof:
I'm an idiot.

Well... That was weird.

I kinda like how Twilight ended up surprisingly Spitfire.

That was quite enjoyable. I like this mini series that you have going on here. I hope that you plan on adding a kinky fourth to its existence. I look forward to reading more by you in the future. Keep up the great writing!

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