Chapter 1: Meet the Misfits
In every family, there’s always the runt; in every flock of white sheep, there’s always a black one; and in every civilization, there’s always a misfit. Even in a place of perfect harmony such as Equestria, there will be a pony or two who stands out from the rest, who doesn’t fit in; a misfit, so to speak. Such as Cyber System, an ocean blue colored unicorn with a dark turquoise mane, who after an accident involving lightning strikes, suffered brain damage and was left unable to use magic, even the most simple spells were impossible for him. His horn useless, Cyber thought his life was ruined until a new path in the road became unlocked to him, technology.
Even though he was now a handicapped unicorn, Cyber System was able to create countless inventions and discoveries with his incredible scientific mind, one of which was a gadget in his back which had four flexible mechanical arms that were attached to his nervous system, allowing him to control them as if they were regular limbs.
Although never regretting the decisions he made and earning his motherboard cutie mark, he was still shunned and teased due to his inability to use magic and weird arms that jutted out of his back. But Cyber stood strong and set off to find a place where technology and outcasts like himself were appreciated. That is when he met his team, The Misfits, which are special ponies that were alienated and became outcasts in their own town. Eventually The Misfits weren’t just a team, they were best friends. However, The Misfits were still feared and shunned, making it impossible for the group to make much progress. So as they wander around Equestria they keep an eye out for some way they can reach Canterlot to meet Princess Celestia, who may just be their only hope in being accepted to ponykind, all while searching for new members they come across in their aimless journey across Equestria.
“Okay, I think this is a good place to stop for the night,” said Cyber, pulling a cart which contained food, tents, sleeping bags, anything they needed on their quest for Canterlot.
“Alright, I’ll be right back,” replied the beige coat and brown mane pegasus, Dusty, who shortly after dove into the ground and drilled a hole so easily it was like diving and swimming through water as he disappeared into the ground.
“About time!” complained Fang, yawning and exposing his sharp, jagged teeth, perfect for tearing apart meat, which was his preferred diet, which was normal for a predator like himself, though, with a stone grey coat and dark grey mane. Aside from his larger, more muscular structure and cutie mark resembling a readied bear trap, his teeth and diet were the most terrifying (and nauseating) feature about the carnivorous misfit.
“So, Cyber,” said a gentle, feminine voice. “Are we close to Canterlot yet?” Cyber looked and smiled at his near black friend with jade green mane, Mixy, who hovered a short distance from the ground as an emerald green aura glowed around her oddly crooked horn, while the same colored aura was around some rocks, wood, and dry grass as they levitated into the position of a campfire. Cyber liked Mixy in not just a way of friendship, but as a way to show all of Equestria that everypony should be accepted as normal citizens, even Mixy, the only pony-changeling hybrid in existence.
“Let me see,” replied Cyber as two of his robotic hands reached into his saddlebag, pulled out a telescope, then placed it around his eye, just barely in the distance he could see a small town ahead. “I think I see a town,” he said before noticing a large castle off in the distance. “Wait a minute... Is that? It might be... Canterlot!” he said excitedly as his arms retracted the telescope and put it away in his saddlebag, then looked behind with a smile to see Fang and Mixy jumping around in happiness.
Shortly after Fang and Mixy’s celebration, Dusty popped up from his hole carrying a chunk of flint in his mouth, which Cyber took with a thanks, then struck it against his metal arm to create a spark and ignite the campfire.
Dusty covered up his hole. “What’s with all the dancing?” he asked.
“There’s a town over there, and I think it might have a way to reach Canterlot!”
Dusty smiled. “Canterlot!?” he exclaimed.
“I know, right?” said Fang. “Finally, a chance to meet Princess Celestia so she can save my tribe from starving.”
“Not to mention she could help show all of Equestria that we’re not, and never should be outcasts,” added Cyber.
Dusty felt excited. “Well, what are we waiting for?”
Mixy stopped Dusty from overreacting. “Dinner,” she answered as Cyber pulled out a pot from the cart, which he suspended over the fire with a spit and began to work on a stew with two hands while the other two pulled out a piece of raw meat from an ice box. The very sight of the bloody animal flesh made Fang’s mouth water, but resisted the urge to eat it as Cyber placed it in a little ‘cooking oven’ that was suspended next to the pot to cook.
“By my calculations, the two meals should reach maximum cooking time simultaneously in approximately 30 minutes,” Cyber said as his robotic arms finished the stew, and got blank stares from his comrades after they failed to understand his scientific vocabulary.
“Cyber, please lay low on the science talk,” reminded Dusty as Fang drooled a stream waiting for the steak to cook.
Cyber rolled his eyes. “It’ll be ready in thirty minutes,” sitting down as he waited, using his robotic hands to tinker with whatever gadget was in his saddlebag.
Fifteen minutes later, Dusty was the first to speak. “So, what do you guys want to see in this new town? I personally want to see somepony who shares my pain, or a unicorn with electrokinesis, or a psychic earth pony that can read minds or turn invisible or something.”
“Yeah, but wouldn’t they know our secrets?” pointed Cyber.
“Which is why they would be a misfit.”
Cyber scratched his chin in thought, then shrugged. “Hm... Fair point, as for me, I don’t care what kind of misfit we get if there is one. Remember, the purpose of our group was to make outcasts feel welcome, not to start a super-powered team to overthrow Celestia.”
Mixy grinned at the idea. “Doesn’t seem like a bad idea, actually,” she joked.
Cyber chuckled. “Anyway, what I’d rather expect is a place that won’t look at us like we’re something that crawled out of the Everfree Forest.”
“I hear you on that,” replied Mixy. “Remember that time we visited Hoofington?”
Dusty nodded. “Yeah, who knew ponies could evacuate that fast.”
“I think I saw one wearing a hazmat suit,” said Cyber.
“A hazmat suit? What?” Dusty was confused. “Where’d they even get one of those?”
“Not sure, what about you, Fang?”
“Uh, uhuuhuh,” Fang moaned, staring at the meat, sizzling in the oven.
Dusty rolled his eyes. “I know that your tribe is starving and all, but do you really need to act like that every time you see a piece of meat?”
“Ugh, uhs, sorry,” Fang moaned again before Cyber’s arms pulled out bowls and a ladle from the cart.
“Whatever, dinner’s done anyway,” he announced as three of his robotic hands worked to pour the soup into bowls while the fourth grabbed the meat and tossed it to Fang, who caught it in his mouth and began to tear it up like a wild animal attacking its prey.
“Cyber, I don’t know how you do it, but these are delicious!” said Mixy, levitating the bowl with her magic.
Cyber waved his arms about for show. “It’s all in the hands.”
Dusty slurped from his soup. “Maybe you could give me some of those hands,” he suggested.
“Trust me, I would, but I found out that magic seems to... Reject neural transmitters.”
“So, that’s a no?”
“Not unless you somehow lose all your magic in a freak lightning accident like I did.”
Dusty shifted uncomfortably at the thought. “I think I’ll stick with digging for now, it is my destiny,” Dusty points to his cutie mark, which was a shovel and a pickaxe.
“Speaking of which,” said Fang through his half-eaten steak. “How is it that only you can dig through solid rock?”
“I dunno, guess I’m just lucky or something. Maybe it’s in my genes.”
Fang wolfed down the rest of his steak. “Yeah, a pegasus has the right genetic makeup to be able to survive underground.”
“Says the carnivorous earth pony.”
“Hey, in my defense, I’m the result of evolution, you are a mutant.”
“Watch that razor sharp mouth of yours, Fang, if it takes me thirty seconds to drill through a boulder, I can break your skull in less than two.”
“Actually, it would take you 1.429 seconds to be exact,” Cyber commented.
“You see? Only one point... Whatever he said seconds, and you’d be dead.”
“I’m pretty sure I can rip out your heart in less than that with just my teeth.” Fang bore his teeth as the two bystanders grimaced at the image.
Mixy intervened. “As much as I would love to hear about how long it would take for you to kill each other,” she said, sarcastic. “Some of us are trying to enjoy our meal without losing our appetite.”
“Ah, let them do it,” said Cyber. “They’ve been competing about everything ever since they met, even if it’s about who can kill who in what time.”
“I don't have a problem with what they’re competing about, I just don’t want to get nauseous because of it.”
“That’s kind of weird, I thought you could feel other ponies’ sympathy,” said Dusty.
“What makes you think that?”
“Well, your cutie mark is a mirror, so I thought it means you reflect feelings from others or something cheesy like that.”
Mixy facehoofed. “First of all: that was bad. Second: it doesn’t mean that I have sympathy, it means I can change my look like a changeling.”
“Only not completely.”
Mixy rolled her eyes. “Okay, yes, but I can change some parts and my voice, I just chose a mirror as my cutie mark because mirrors show others who they really are, no matter what they look like.”
“Would that be your cutie mark story or how your parents met?” said Dusty.
“At least my cutie mark story doesn’t involve becoming traumatized, thus depriving me of the one thing my kind is known for,” countered Mixy.
Dusty smiled and shrugged, knowing he’s been beaten. “Touché.”
“Anyway,” Cyber said, “I wonder how we can get to Canterlot from this new town.”
“Not sure,” said Fang. “What’s the name of that place, anyway?”
“I don’t know, it would be easier once I finish my EPS.”
The others gave confused looks. “EPS?” they asked.
“EPS, Equestrian Positioning System, it will allow us to not only see where we are, but also it will provide useful traveling directions,” Cyber reached in his saddlebag and pulled out the small black rectangle device he was working on. “There’s just one step left.”
“What’s that?” asked Mixy, then Cyber rubbed the back of his neck out of nervousness.
“I, uh... I need Celestia and Luna’s permission to launch a satellite into orbit to provide accurate location, and I’m worried about their reaction of a ponymade item orbiting Equestria.”
“Why don’t you use those wings you were working on to do it?” asked Fang as Cyber put the EPS back in his saddlebag.
“I told you the wings require a thrust to fly, and it hasn’t been properly modified to maintain stationary or vertical flight, besides it’s still just a prototype. Furthermore, none of the individuals here have the capability or the adaption to remain conscious within the vacuum of space outside of our atmosphere.”
“Cyber, you’re talking science again,” reminded Dusty as Cyber rolled his eyes.
“It’s not ready yet and we can’t breathe in space but I’m working on it,” Cyber put simply.
“Well, Dusty can breathe in dust, is it the same? Maybe he can put your thingamabob up there,” suggests Fang making Dusty’s face wince with notice and fear.
“And go up there? Up where it’s high? No, no way, I don’t care if the fate of Equestria is at stake I am not going up there!”
“Oh yeah, I forgot you’re scared of heights, but what about Mixy?”
“If a pony can’t live up there, I doubt a changeling could.”
“Mixy’s right,” said Cyber. “We need Luna to do it, being the only one to have survived on the moon for a thousand years”
That got Fang’s attention. “A thousand years?” he exclaimed. “Jeez she’s old, are all the princesses that old on the mainland?”
“Celestia is,” said Cyber. “Princess Twilight is around our age, Princess Cadence is several years older than Twilight.”
Dusty slurped the last of his dinner and placed his empty bowl on a nearby rock. “Anyway, so when are we leaving?”
“First thing tomorrow,” confirmed Cyber as Mixy placed her bowl on top of Dusty’s, and Cyber on top of the stack.
The four misfits watched as the sun set over the horizon and the moon rose to take its place, sprinkling the sky with twinkling stars. The four couldn’t help but look in awe at the beautiful array that the night brought; although, sleep eventually caught up to them as Dusty rapidly beat his hooves on the dirt, gathered up the dust cloud, then hopped on it for a good night’s sleep; Mixy crawled into her sleeping bag; and Fang simply fell over on his side and fell asleep, in an awkward albeit relatively comfortable position.
With his friends asleep, Cyber found this a good opportunity to wash the dishes in the nearby stream. Deftly he gathered up the bowls his friends left and balancing them on top of each other. While doing so he also grabbed a small cloth from the cart and went on his way to the running water. Once there he quickly washed the residue off each of them, making sure to avoid scraping any of them with his metal hands and possibly waking his friends.
With the dishes washed, Cyber wiped his short turquoise blue mane from his eyes and came to realize that he felt a little light headed, a condition he comes down with from time to time. With a sigh, Cyber reached into a deep compartment within his saddlebag and pulled out a syringe, and another box with a small screen similar to his EPS but smaller and white. Cyber poked his foreleg with the syringe, wincing at the pain but brushing it aside as he watched it fill up with blood and a thick, black, oily residue.
Cyber grimaced at the sight he never got familiar with. “If the others knew about this, they would freak once they find out my inventions could kill,” he muttered as he stuck the needle in a small hole box and injected the contaminated blood while a third arm cleaned the puncture wound with a piece of cotton.
Shortly the device came to life and displayed results of the blood he inserted in it, with a depressed sigh, Cyber looked at what it showed to him.
BLOOD POISONING: 47%
“Just a minor drawback for these machines,” Cyber said to himself. “Computer, initiate blood filter, transport residue to back output,” the response he got was a few beeps, whirring, then a brief period of feeling numb, dizzy and lightheaded that made him lie down as his device redirected his blood flow to filter and dialyze his blood. Then shortly as feeling and blood flow returned, Cyber felt fit as a fiddle.
Getting back on his hooves, Cyber looked at his back to see a small, cylindrical glass container rise from his back that was full of the black, viscous liquid that was previously mixed with his blood.
“I’ve done this for fifteen years and I still don’t know what this stuff is,” he muttered as he removed the container from the machine, placed it in his saddlebag for future use, then deeply inhaled to relax as he was about to sleep.
“In the name of the princess, you are under arrest,” said a gruff, male voice behind Cyber, who jumped up out of surprise.
Cyber began to turn around. “I didn’t do anything! I’m completely-” he stopped and relaxed at the sight of Mixy behind him, giggling at how easy it was to frighten him with a simple change in her voice. “Very funny, Mixy,” he frowned.
“Oh, come on, don’t be so uptight, Cyber,” Mixy said. “At least it wasn’t like the time at nightmare night,” she put on a shocked expression as her voice dramatically changed to sound exactly like Cyber’s “’No! Don’t kill me! I’m too young to die, Nightmare Moon!’ You really acted like a foal then, I think you even leaked a little,” her voice returned to normal after doing her impression of Cyber.
Cyber blushed. “I told you, that was the machine, not me!” his eyes flickered a little.
Mixy laughed again. “Oh, calm down, Cyber, it was just a joke,” she assured, making Cyber sulk in embarrassment, but once her yellow green, slightly serpentine eyes met his yellow ones, Cyber couldn’t help but smile as well.
Cyber chuckled. “I guess I was acting a bit foalish back then.”
“You still act foalish, brainiac,” Mixy nudged Cyber.
“So do you, pretender,” the two shared a laugh. “So what kept you up? Is Fang snoring again?”
“Nah, I just couldn’t sleep,” Mixy smiled.
“So, are you excited to meet the princesses?”
“Well, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, but personally I would rather seek misfits like us.”
Mixy was confused. “So why are we determined to see the princess so bad?”
“Fang’s tribe is in a famine, they’re beginning to run out of food, with only a very small supply from a neighboring tribe, and Fang believes that Celestia can help with that.”
“Will they be alright?”
“Fang told me that there should be enough meat for a few more years, but even then there’s still the threat of pestilence and plague, though Fang’s kind are natural born survivors, so we can take our time, but we should see the princess as soon as possible.”
“Why does Dusty want to go so badly then?”
“Dusty is Fang’s best friend, he’ll do anything to support him, also Dusty has the same reason as you: to simply ask her to show Equestria we’re not something to be feared or mocked.”
“What about you, do you have any plans for the princess?”
Cyber nodded. “Of course, I plan on showing Celestia my inventions to help Equestria.”
“Just as long as you don’t send Equestria into nuclear warfare.”
“Don’t worry, I stopped experimenting with nuclear radioactivity ever since the accident.”
“Accident? What happened?” Mixy asked, concerned.
Cyber frowned uncomfortably at the memory. “I’d rather not talk about it.”
“That bad?”
“Let’s just say that nuclear energy is now banned in over half of Equestria.”
“Yikes, when did this happen?”
“Some time before I met Dusty,” Cyber desperately looked for a way to change the subject. “So, I heard that changelings feed off of love, do you do that? Not to offend you or anything.”
Mixy giggled. “Nothing you say could offend me, and yes, I can feed off of love, but I just do what my dad does and just use my own love or the love my parents have for me.”
“I just thought that you would be a bit nervous, given the changelings’ reputation.”
“I understand, and to be honest, I am a little nervous, I can’t really copy as good as my dad, but I’m glad that my friends will be there to help me if I need it,” Mixy nuzzled Cyber.
Cyber smiled at her. “Anytime, though I’ll have to talk with your father to know how the whole ‘using your own love’ thing works.”
“So, Cyber?”
“Yes?”
“Well, I’m... I’m going to bed, good night.”
“Alright, good night,” Cyber waved to Mixy as she left to the camp. Cyber simply looked at the moon in wonder, letting out a slight gasp as he saw a shooting star streak across the sky.
‘My only wish is for ponies to treat us like civilians instead of monsters.’ Cyber thought as he lay his head down and slowly drifted to sleep.
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A decent start so far. You get a good general feel for the main characters quite quickly. Just a couple of questions.
Firstly, why do these ponies not know where Canterlot is?
It's the capital of what we believe to be the largest nation, and it's on the largest mountain in the nation. Hard to miss, you should add some sort of explanation there.
And secondly, Cadence, canon has all but confirmed she is several years older than Twilight, and I doubt anypony would say her age is 'unknown'.
Other than that and a couple spelling/grammatical error, I approve. Have a like.
4776378
Well, as best as I can explain, they are only wandering around equestria aimlessly, so if they were to find canterlot it would be by chance.
Also I was looking for candence's specific age, though I can see that being confusing, I will fix that.
My first criticism,
This is possibility the best written and longest run-on sentence I have ever read. A good proof reader could help you divide and conquer this.
My second criticism is just basic conversation structure. You have to indicate who is talking with each change of speaker. You could get away with not stating who is speaking if the conversation is only between two people/ponies/creatures. Adding more people into a conversation without stating who is talking at that specific moment will just confuse your readers.
Other then that it's a good start to a story, but you should really get a proof reader to clean up spelling and capitalization.
One last, last thing when describing a new character it's usually a good idea to state their name then write their description. It usually helps to make the story flow better if you're a new writer.
4776474
On it, fixing now, thanks, I tend to make run-ons from time to time.
4776452 Okay, cool. Just remember, we've seen Cadence as a filly with Twilight, so she isn't much older than her. In my personal headcanon she's an 'artificial alicorn' an alicorn that ascended like Twilight, whereas Celestia and Luna are 'natural alicorns' being born as them. I look forward to the next chapter.
Rather, you spell it rathar quite a few times.
My only problem: descriptions. You never say any mane styles, though with Fang's backstory one would picture him with long, shaggy hair(who would bring a hairbrush to a desert island?), nor do you provide an eye color for Dusty or Fang.
You wrot breath instead of breathe a coulpe times, and once Luna's name lacked capitalization
Dude, you have a problem with exposition.
For a story mainly comprised of OCs, this is... surprisingly good. I admit, I'm not a big fan of OC-centric stories, but this is pretty darn good for an amateur.
Great start to the story! I actually laughed a few times, so great job!
Love this story so far!!
The intro was a bit too much "tell" and not enough "show", which made it awkward.
Digging through stone isn't really that impressive now that the show canon has at least one unicorn and multiple earth ponies who can do it
Cyber System and Windy Days need to meet.
800-year-old technology-biased scientist plus this guy? Yes, please.
8695404
800 years old and technology-based? I'm intrigued. Tell me more.
I've got no clue if these two will meet. Right now, I just wanna know more about the character.