a wizard in equestria

by The A I

cake theif part 1

Unknown amount of time later.
A group of guards are waiting outside my cave with a campfire discussing something, I am not really listening, and they seem to have set up camp. The smell of burning wood and crackle of leaves echoed through the cave, annoying me greatly. An all too familiar smell hits me like a brick wall. The smell of burning marshmallows that have been left in a fire and have turned black from the heat. "Surely they know when a marshmallow's burnt." I think to myself.
The sound of a pegasus landing outside the cave and an unknown number more fill the air, except it sounds like they are just taking off from the ground. I head straight towards where the smell is coming from, to find a put out bombfire and a sight saying 'hope you like marshmallows'. I look into what’s left of the fire and see a small pile of slightly burnt marshmallows. I go to take one but they suddenly disintegrate as a slight wind blows the ash that’s left of the real marshmallows in the illusion disappears revealing nothing but ash.
"YOU YELLOW BASTARDS! COME BACK AND GET WHATS COMMING TO YA! I'LL RIP YA LEGS OFF!" I yell after the group of pegasi guards flying off towards Canterlot. Not noticing the giant purple bubble around it shatter and tiny black dots flinging through it. Meanwhile in Canterlot. "Changelings! Why in the name of Celestia are there changelings!? You'll never take me alive!" A random noble shouts and jumps off the edge of Canterlot. The changelings taking no notice of him in the slightest.
Luna’s POV. "Sittin’ on the toilet. Sittin’ on the toilet. Sittin’ on the toilet. And flush." Luna says while sitting on the toilet. "We have Canterlot surrounded and the door ready to be blown in. Come out now or prepare for the consequences." A changeling says from outside the toilet.
"I will stay inside the toilet until my bladder is free from its waste! Even if it takes a thousand years!" Luna yells in reply. Then continues saying 'sittin’ on a toilet. Sittin’ on a toilet.' for the rest of the battle for Canterlot.
Merasmus point of view.Gliding in the ground below a panicking city is more entertaining than I thought. Every time I pass bellow a group of ponies or changelings I say random things. For example "RUN! RUN FROM THE DOUGHNUT MONSTERS!" Or "Welcome. TO YOUR DOOM!" And every time they jump high in the air. Oh how it’s fun to scare innocent ponies. Anyway. Back to the matter at hand. I stop underneath the wall of the palace and ascend up until I reach the throne room. I take a quick look around and see chrysalis at the balcony, shining armor standing on a platform with green eyes, Celestia stuck in a green cocoon on the ceiling and everypony else stuck to the ground with green goo. "Miss chrysalis, do you know where the bakery is? I need to get revenge on Celestia and her guards for tricking me by placing an illusion on overly burnt marshmallows." I ask as politely as I can. "Uh, what? Um..." she replies obviously confused. Sighing I hover up to Celestia and open a hole in the cocoon she’s in. "Princess, could you direct me to your bakery please? If so I might spare your cakes." I almost laugh at her expression of pure horror. "You wouldn’t dare! They are for special occasions! I will never tell you where they are! Never!" Celestia yells at me. "In that case." I reseal the cocoon. "Can anyone here guide me to the royal bakery here?" "Beast. As it makes Celestia squirm I will have a drone guide you to her, vault of cake, though it looks like nothing could enter it..." Chrysalis says. "Ah! Thank you your majesty. Would you like some cake afterwards?" Without waiting for an answer I rush off through many walls and straight to the bakery. I knew where it was the whole time, just below the throne room.

Author's Note:

And so the theiving of cake begins!

Comments

[cosmosain]

4775206
God........
Fuck it all help us

[Sgt GobSmacker]

There's 2 cake theif part 1's!?

[The A I]

4779146
not any more. 1st one deleted itself when I published it but clearly that turned out not to be the case.
sorry about that