Years after Scootaloo goes missing, Rainbow Dash comes to the place where they first became sisters and remembers what caused her little sister's disappearance.
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- Member Since 23rd Apr, 2013
- offline last seen Monday
Deep
"A world without friendship is a lonely world indeed."
Deep
Joined 23rd Apr, 2013 ·
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So sad
Not bad. Didn't make me cry, but it did leave me feeling a little empty inside.
That's a win, by the way. Good work.
Nice work conveying the emotion and characterization.
Great story, left me feeling sad.
Great sad story.
Apple Bloom's name is two words, and belle should be Belle.
Cute
4752092
Very nice job.
4751966
Maybe? It's really whatever you want to believe. Same with why she even disappeared in the first place.
For me I think Scootaloo never comes back, but I've always liked sad endings
Why must I constantly read these stories that provoke deep feels that I do not understand? they do not compute!!
Good story,m8. I like the whole cliffhanger ending ya got there though I never liked em. not because I hate em but because I hate not knowing. I sincerely hope she comes back. or maybe created a life somewhere else.
Damn, that's a heart-wrencher. So sad!
I can see Two Steps From Hell's "Friendship to Last" playing in this story.
9 out of 10.
4752823 I can't figure out which one I would want to read. Sequel please? Or maybe an alternate ending also?
4754111
I would make a sequel but I like the open ended ending since it makes it more.... depressing. We'll see though... you never know
My heart.... ache can't take the feels.... ACHHHHHHHH MY FEELSSSSSSS
4754684 I hope you do.
SEQUEL! SEQUEL! SEQUEL! SEQUEL!
Beautifully written. It made me tear up a bit, definitely one for the favourites. The only thing I'd say is that wouldn't have thought Rainbow would've been so self-centred while remembering what happened between her and Scootaloo. That's my only criticism, try not to flanderise characters too much in future stories. Anyway, have a watch, I'm interested in seeing more content from you in the future.
/ 10
4756290
Thanks! Yeah I still got a way to go when it comes to writing the characters ( who doesn't?). I am curious to how I made her too self centered though? Was it by not taking into account how the others felt from Scootaloo's disappearance?
And thanks for the watch.... Though technically you're not following me yet?
I hope I don't die from feels
4755876
I want a prequel more. Or a "What really happened."
AAAAGH, THE FEEEEELZ, oh shit... I cried
The ending reminds me of The Man That Never Moved by The Script. Also, good story. I kinda want to know a bit more about why she glared ever more when an adventure was done. Was it because every time she heard or saw her she remembers what Rainbow said? Any evidence from her home to see how she was kidnapped or ran away? Was there none?. The grammar: no mistakes that I can think of. Overall, I would give you an 8/10. Of course, you can choose to ignore this since I am new to this. :) You get a watch and favourite!
4756446 Thanks for the reply and the reminder to follow you, I quit off the window after posting my comment! Sorry about that! xD Anyway, in response to your question, I just felt there were a few lines that would be a touch out of character for her. The real reason that Rainbow Dash is a bit arrogant is to show off to others around her, so having her say such lines as, "The first day stunk, but whose didn't? Except mine." or, "Guess the better Pegasus really did win." just felt a tad out of place, seeing as she's talking to herself. This was an incredibly deep and moving piece of fiction, and having these bits took me out of the moment. Of course, it is incredibly difficult to write Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie or Rarity and making sure not to play certain aspects of their personality to the extreme. Again, thanks! It was a brilliant work.
4759894
Oh I get what you mean. Actually never thought of her that way. In my mind she's arrogant ALL the time, even when she's thinking to herself. I'll remember that for next time.
Just doing my job
Sorta perfect. Ruined and perfected my day. I didn't cry, you didn't write it so I would cry, but I am
. Really good though!
So is scootoloo dead? I didn't understand that
4760988
Maybe. Like I said to another poster, what happened to Scoots is whatever you want to believe happened. She could have ran away out of sadness cuz of Dash, she could've ran away from her abusive family or she could've been killed by the fillynapper.
4761692 yeah so hey I all for leaving the reader thinking, but because you added the fillynapper I was just confused
. It would have been improved if you had added some dialog either confirming that or just didn't have it.
Interesting read.
...Sequel?
4761692 In the beginning I assumed that she killed herself, but then at the end I thought that Dash was going to kill herself. I felt that there should have been closure, either to Dash or Scootaloo. But it was good none the less. I read these stories to feel, and it worked.
Scootaloo is not Rainbow Dash's little sister.
This needs a sequel; I wanna know what happened to Scootaloo. Good job on this.
4764647 Well, you're right and wrong.
Yes, Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo were not born from the same parents, but metaphorical "sisters." Kind of like Susano and Amaterasu from Okami (bad example, but you know what I mean).
4764647
You would be right if we were talking about biological family, but from the episode "Sleepless in Ponyville," Rainbow Dash did kind of adopt Scootaloo as a "surrogate sister." So canonically, they are indeed sisters, at least in a loose definition of the word.
before I start reading this, is this a sequel to anything?
4779142
Nope! It's a stand alone fic.
Nice story, but not enough sad :P (Ok. Seriously I almost cry when I read this, but ciii...). Like and favourite :D
Very good!
Definitely enjoyed it! 
Gotta say though, it was pretty sad. 
Sequel? 
4851680
Sorry, but I feel that this is one of those stories that is better left as it is. Having an answer would just make it less sad.
memecrunch.com/meme/1W6IT/hey-who-left-this-bowl-of-onions-here/image.png
It's creative, but I didn't really *cry*
Did I miss a detail?
5925317
Truthfully, I didn't write this to make anyone cry. My real intention was to get people to wonder why Scootaloo had run off. If it was because she couldn't fly... or something else.
4851723 i don't care if it would make it less sad I got to know what happened
4764647 How would you know that? Some fan wiki?
5291624
5987808
The fact that everyone knows that and it's been stated again and again, duh.
5988209 But did someone like Lauren Faust say that? Did they mention that in the show? MLP fandomkind will never know.
5988244
Faust confirmed it four years ago. I guess you missed it.
And if people can't figure it out from the show alone, then I'd be surprised if they can name the main characters. Or color inside the lines.
5988262 How would you know that person in the chat is the oh-great and powerful Faust? There can't possibly be proof for that one, sorry. Also, this remark:
Is unacceptable. And for your information, if you're talking about me...I am proud of not colouring inside the lines, okay. And yes I can name the main characters:
Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Applejack, Rarity, Twilight Sparkle.
I have watched every single freaking episode and I know my stuff, okay! Geez.
You are officially block-worthy.