Scootaloo's Noble Sacrifice

by Mattricole

Scootaloo's Noble Sacrifice

“Wow, ah can’t believe we didn’t see Diamond Tiara all weekend,” Apple Bloom said, walking with her fellow Crusaders to school.

“I know! Isn’t it awesome?” Scootaloo sighed happily. “Too bad we’re gonna see her at school though.”

“Cheer up, Scoots, maybe she’s sick?” Sweetie Belle said with a smile. “If she’s sick, then we won’t have to see her again!”

“Ah hope she isn’t sick,” Apple Bloom muttered. “Last time she was sick she made me come over to her place and take care of her. Made me wear a nurses outfit too!” Apple Bloom muttered as she thought back to that outfit. It was surprisingly comfy though.

“Wait, why did you go to Diamond’s house?” Scootaloo asked with a grimace.

“Well, our families are pretty good friends, and Diamond really likes taking advantage of that.”

Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo looked towards each other, confusion adorning their faces.

“Uh, Apple Bloom?” Sweetie Belle asked, poking Apple Bloom’s shoulder.

“Yeah?”

“How often does Diamond Tiara have you come to her house and dress up?”

“Hmm, let me think fer a sec,” Apple Bloom said. She rubbed her chin in thought, and then made a few tally marks in the ground, muttering to herself. “Ah’d say about once a week.”

“Uh huh,” Scootaloo mumbled with a nod. “And what does she dress you up as?”

“Nurses, a ballerina, cat mare, oh, and one time she had me dress as a succubus, whatever that is!” Apple Bloom said, giggling at the ridiculous outfit for a succubus. “Even had me do little poses for her. Why do ya’ll ask?”

Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo continued to stare at her, pity in their eyes as they shook their heads in disgust.

“I hate you, Apple Bloom,” Scootaloo growled, glaring at a now confused Apple Bloom.

“Hey! What’d ah do?!”

“You’re dense, that’s what you did,” Sweetie Belle said. “Poor Diamond Tiara, no wonder she’s so mean to us.”

“Wait, what?”

“I think it’s a stupid excuse,” Scootaloo huffed. “But still, if Apple Bloom would just take one for the team, at least she’d leave us alone. Heck! She might even be nice to us and buy us stuff!”

“Take one for the team? Buy us stuff? What in tarnation are ya’ll talkin’ about?”

“Oh come on, Scoots! Can you really see Apple Bloom as a gold digger?”

“Gold digger? Ah’m a farmer, not a-”

“You know, we can fix this!” Scootaloo said as she shoved her hoof into Apple Bloom’s mouth. “Diamond Tiara likes dressing Apple Bloom up. All we have to do is put Apple Bloom in some costume, have her confess her undying love for Diamond Tiara-”

“Mah undying what?!”

“-And bam! Everypony’s happy!”

“That’s brilliant!”

“That’s stupid!” Apple Bloom yelled as she backed away from her friends. “Fer one thing, Diamond Tiara doesn’t even like me that way, and two…” Apple Bloom paused, confused at the looks her friends were giving her. “...What?”

“Are you serious?” Sweetie Belle asked. “She forces you to come over to her place at least once a week, dresses you up in cute outfits, and you think she doesn’t like you?”

“Well...yeah?” Apple Bloom replied, causing her friends to groan.

“Apple Bloom, I have a question. Does Diamond Tiara ever give you things?” Scootaloo asked.

“Well, yeah. But she doesn’t do it for me!”

“...Huh?” Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle mumbled, giving Apple Bloom an odd look.

“Well, whenever she does do somethin’ for me, she always tells me ‘it’s not like ah did this for you or anything’! Her dad probably made her do it,” Apple Bloom explained with a shrug. Her friends continued staring at her and groaned, as if in pain.

“Alright, it’s settled,” Sweetie Belle said as she began heading towards Carousel Boutique. “We’re ditching school, getting Apple Bloom a cute outfit, and she’s going to confess to Diamond Tiara.”

“Wait, no ah’m no-”

“You owe us!” Scootaloo yelled as she grabbed Apple Bloom by the shoulders and glared into her eyes. “Everyday Diamond Tiara’s bullying gets worse and worse! And if the only way to stop it is for you to date her, then it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to force you to make!”

“...Okay,” Apple Bloom muttered sadly as she began following Sweetie Belle. Scootaloo smirked victoriously as she followed her two friends.

And by you dating Diamond, that means we’ll be her friends by association! she thought giddily to herself. Aw, I hope Diamond buys us a yacht! That would be so cool!

---

“Ah feel stupid,” Apple Bloom muttered.

“You look adorable!” Sweetie Belle replied, stroking the costumed Apple Bloom. “And I think it’s fitting that you’re dressed up as a lamb!”

“Yeah, Diamond Tiara’s going to love it!” Scootaloo said as she led the way to Diamond Tiara’s mansion. When they finally got there they saw Diamond Tiara opening the gate. “Hi, Diamond Tiara!”

“Huh?” Diamond Tiara turned around and frowned. “Oh great. What do you three wa-AAAAT?!” she shouted, staring at Apple Bloom. “W-why is...how...WHAT?!” She quickly ran up to Apple Bloom, gaping at her.

“...Baa?” Apple Bloom muttered, causing Diamond Tiara to squeal.

“She’s so adorable!” Diamond Tiara screamed as she glomped Apple Bloom, nuzzling her cheek against Apple Bloom’s. “I always knew you felt the same! But to think you’d take the initiative?!”

“...Baa?”

“Oh ho ho! I see you want to take this seriously,” Diamond Tiara whispered against Apple Bloom’s ear. “We’re going to have so much fun tonight.”

“And that’s our cue to leave,” Sweetie Belle muttered as she and Scootaloo walked away from the cuddling couple.

After a moment, Scootaloo stopped and turned back to the touching scene. As she watched Apple Bloom getting glomped by Diamond Tiara, a lone tear fell from her eye. All the bullying, insults, and evil laughter would never again ring in her ears. The emptiness in her heart grew, but it mattered not. The large smile that was adorning Diamond Tiara’s face was worth the emotional turmoil she was experiencing. Lifting a trembling hoof towards Diamond Tiara, her lips quivered as she whispered words that were meant for her alone.

“Goodbye, my love. Goodbye, my precious diamond.”

Author's Note:

Scootaloo...you will always be remembered :'(

Comments

[Bootsy Slickmane]

Now that's taking one for the team.
*Salutes*
Scoot on, little filly. Scoot on.

[Seether00]

Such a sacrifice!

[Azure Sandora]

Wow... that ending was unexpected. Great job though.

[FanOfMostEverything]

I was concerned at first, but then I checked the tags. Given that you wrote this, the conclusion was obvious.

Still, that last line...

In any case, thank you for this.

[Tatsurou]

You need to remove the tragedy tag. This isn't a tragedy.

It is hilarious, though.

[Mattricole]

4730708 Scootaloo begs to differ. She is completely and utterly heartbroken.

[nemryn]

4730708 4730716
I mean, Scootaloo has a True Love but It Can Never Be, which is Tragedy 101.

[Tatsurou]

4730716
Pretty sure it would only qualify as Sad by site standards. Pretty sure Tragedy is reserved for things like dramatic character death.

[Lag Incarnate]

Mmm, watcha say... ooh that you only meant well...

[HumanFlea]

Oh that feel sucker punch right at the end!

I gotta say, I like your version of diamond tiara the best. I've read versions that made me want to kick actual foals but yours is always more of a comedic villain. Not evil just the right mixture of stubbornness and narcissism that make her think shes always right... also her crush on AB is adorable!

Don't worry Scoots i'm sure Sweetie will give you a pity hug.

[Mattricole]

4730787
Don't know what to tell ya. The story was approved with these specific tags. There's no way for Scootaloo to gain Diamond Tiara's love which causes her emotional distress. Her best friend is with the mare she loves, and even though Scoots is the one that made it so, it still gives her great suffering, both of which fit in with the definition of tragedy-"an event causing great suffering, destruction, and distress, such as a serious accident, crime, or natural catastrophe" according to google. Yes, death is one of the greatest forms of tragedy, but it certainly isn't the only one. So since Scoots ending is, imo, beyond just "sad" and the fact the mod approved the story I do believe the tag is staying.

[RainbowBob]

4730716
Tragedy is when the hero causes their own downfall, AKA their heroic flaw such as a hubris leads to a bad ending by their own hand. Unlike a villain causing the hero's fall, the hero themselves are what leads to their downfall, which is what a tragedy is. As for this story, no, it is definitely not a tragedy.

[Mattricole]

4730981
The hero doesn't have to cause their own downfall. Yes, they often do, but stories can be tragic in other ways as well. For instance the hero suffering and unable to do anything to change his fate and turning into a happy ending.

Seriously looking into this story, no, it's not a tragedy. I wrote a comedic story where Scoots just gets a bad ending out of nowhere. Could I have used sad? Yes, but I felt tragedy would better emphasize her pain at knowing that she'll never have DT.

[Matt11]

I'm confused did scootaloo die or something....

[Mattricole]

4731050 Nah, I just felt like adding that in the authors note as a joke.

[Matt11]

4731055 ok thats good

[Bootsy Slickmane]

4730708
4730981
I think this qualifies as a lighter version of tragedy, at least by Fimfic standards.

A Tragedy has, by definition, a sad ending, but it doesn't mean the story is sad until that point; unlike a Sad story, it always, always will have a sad or bittersweet ending.

Scoots has harbored these feelings for who-knows how long, only to give it all up for the sake of her friends by shipping her beloved with somepony else. Even in a comedy, that's bittersweet.

[elmago02]

I think the Tragedy tag is just a bit too much. Maybe sad?

[Mattricole]

4731119 Can't have a sad tag, there's a comedy tag. In the FAQ it says:

Sometimes people get confused and think that morbid humor is equal to a sad comedy. It isn't. You cannot have sadness in equal measure to comedy in a story. One will take the spotlight, because in the end your story will achieve primarily one outcome: either it makes someone sad... or it makes them smile.

I agree with the FAQ, the two tags contradict each other to much. With tragedy, according to the FAQ,

A Tragedy has, by definition, a sad ending, but it doesn't mean the story is sad until that point; unlike a Sad story, it always, always will have a sad or bittersweet ending.

so going by this, tragedy works better in this case.

[Telaros]

i57.tinypic.com/34jbr55.jpg
And none were more nobler than she...

Poor Scootaloo. It took a lot of courage to give that up for her friends.

[Lily Gingertail]

Hmm, yea well written and a noble case 5/10 not something i will read again but i'll up vote it.
~Tobben

[Titanium Dragon]

Well, that was... something.

I don't think this really deserved the tragedy tag. Honestly the ending fell flat for me, because it wasn't silly enough; it kind of came out of nowhere (yes, there was one line setting it up) but it didn't really fit with the rest of the story.

[Titanium Dragon]

4731168
You can definitely make a sad comedy; things can be both funny and sad. Tragicomedy is obviously a thing, but sadness can definitely be comedic.

[Telaros]

4731119 Tragedy is one of the most misunderstood tags, and even people who think they know it, tend not to fully understand it. Though, the tragedy tag is correct in this story's case despite popular opinion.

Though one would probably have to read more of his Scoot stories, outside of Motherverse, to fully grasp how truly tragic this story is. But if you read the ending carefully, it certainly has a tragic and bitter end for one of our lead characters.

Truly a noble sacrifice.

[PiercingSight]

I'll admit, I laughed. The tags are perfect.

[Mad Maudlin]

4731376

Tragedy is just comedy when the butt of the joke someone you like.

[SapphireSparks]

4731168 You must read the Fault In Our Stars then.

[TheOtherSideOfFluttershy]

This tragedy..... THE FEELS!!!!!!! this has made my day. RIP Scootalo

[Blue Blaze {COMET}]

wat

[GrayfoxReloaded]

Dem feels.
PoorvScoots.

Dat song in the notes.
It was awesome.

[goaway]

Aw, poor Scootaloo.

[Random Dude]

um WAT *hand slips and favorites and likes* whoops my hand slipped and im to lazy to undo that

[_Mintz_]

Good story but i was looking to cry today. Oh well this was a good short story

[Aramadon]

Want to upvote, want to downvote...
Want to comment, not sure what to say...

Man, I have no idea what to do with this story.

[devas]

4734786

give it an imaginary vote :-P

[Onyx Heart]

So Scootaloo has a crush on Diamond Tiara?

[CookieDo]

WOW. I Like It

[Telaros]

4735516 If you like Scootaloo, and want to see more of how it began, http://www.fimfiction.net/story/160912/to-earn-ones-love that is a good start. Diamond Tiara Likes Dating Sims is pretty hysterical though. Many people enjoyed the Shipping Goggles one, might be a good one to start off with as well. Depends how much you enjoy reading fanfics and those with the CMC.

4735954 Love the name. And welcome to fimfiction!

[Griseus]

Honestly.

[G-AB Acid]

4730716 There's no buildup for any emotional catharsis whatsoever. This is not a tragedy. An attempt at one, maybe, but definitely not a tragedy.

[themouthofmush]

what i just read...was alright. not good, not bad, just alright. no other way to say it than that.

[CookieDo]

Thank you so much. happy fluttercry.

[akajulester]

Um... what?

[Rhythmic Gravity Chance]

Truly a noble sacrifice.

[Rambling Tree]

This is truly the most tragic of tragedies. Broken heart, thy name is Scootaloo.

[Stormy Skies]

This was a wonderful read. Love and tragedy on the playground. It has the feeling of how seriously children take things like this, and the absurdity of it all when viewed from the outside.

[PinkiePieFox]

This is wonderful!

[NachoTheBrony]

lol

[Derpator]

Huh.

Well I see what the fuss about warranting the Tragedy tag is about. No, this story doesn't need it. Yes it's a bit of a sad ending for Scootaloo, but it certainly isn't tragic. I was liking this premise, it was fluffy and cute, especially seeing Diamond Tiara into what it was. Apple Bloom was put into an uncomfortable situation which is something the CMCs are good at.

But that ending. Honestly, I don't see the point. You were not setting up that ending at all until the paragraph at the end, in which it suddenly did a WHOALP, SUDDEN TRAGEDY SHIFT!

This story isn't really focused around Scootaloo either, except for the final paragraph and line, which at a total, probably comes out to less than 100 words. That's under 1/10 of the entire story, and so my question is this:

Why is this titled 'Scootaloo's Noble Sacrifice'? I know what she's sacrificing here, but it really comes out of left field to the point where I don't really care about it. You didn't build it up for me to find it tragic, or even sad. It's not really an 'ultimate sacrifice' either. The fic is not based around your title, except for a sudden ending change, which appears out of thin air and slaps it in my face telling me exactly what's happening. I get what's happening here, but because of the short length you actually gave me going on about this supposed sacrifice, I didn't really feel anything for Scootaloo. Like Titanium Dragon said, it didn't fit with the rest of the story, and because of that, it kind of failed in that regard.

I was liking this setup. Regular CMC shtick that goes down, and Apple Bloom is pretty oblivious to Diamond Tiara's hobby here. Pretty funny stuff if pulled off correctly, and you did to a degree. But the ending kind of ruined it for me. I'm not seeing a point to it. This fic isn't bad, but I just don't get why you put that ending in. So I'll upvote for the enjoyable read, but that's about it.

[Mattricole]

4740903 I like to put surprise endings that make no sense just to get ppl to say "what the ?!". I enjoy doing it, most of my readers tend to enjoy it, so it's a habit that is most likely going to stay.