Orchestra
Luna was in her room, contemplating about the weeks that had passed after Discord’s return. She had just raised the moon and was now lying on her bed, thinking of the troublemaker she loved. He could be rude, but she looked past his exterior and felt the kind being that resided inside of him. Luna started thinking about her past with him, when he was still a Draconequus. Back then, it was much simpler than what it was now. She didn’t have the same responsibility like the one she had now. She sighed and closed her eyes, thinking about simpler times. She fell asleep soon after, re-living the memories in her dreams.
-----
Ugh... This court is so boring! Why does Celestia insist on holding them, when the ponies who come to court are just elders looking for something to do!? We’re not even royalty! We’re just alicorns, after all... Mother and father dissappeared when I was ten years old, and when Celestia was seventeen. My mother’s cutiemark appeared on me and my father’s cutiemark appeared on Celestia. She doesn’t like to talk about our parents. I think she’s hiding something from me...
I wonder what Discord is doing right now... He’s probably doing something fun, and not being held back to listen to ponies complain. I will have to go and visit him later, as I haven’t met him in... how long has it been? Two weeks? Yes, that seems fair... I will have to sneak out, though. I’ll go tonight, I can’t wait to see him again.
***
Celestia is sleeping right now, I checked her room and she was snoring. Loudly. I snuck past the gate to our house, or ’castle’ as Celestia likes to call it when it’s just a glorified hut. I spread my wings and took off into my night. I don’t know why, but the serenity of flying during the night is just so relaxing. It’s amazing, really. It’s such a shame the ponies below sleep during the night, missing it. Oh well...
I’m flying over a big forest that Celestia had named the Everfree forest, I don’t know why she decided to call it that. It’s a silly name.
I circle around the grove where I met him the first time, where I... shot him down... Lucky thing that he forgave me for it, as that lion paw of his seems to be awfully strong, but it’s also awfully soft. His eyes are just... Amazing. They always have some kind of ethereal glow, even in the dark. I presume it helps him see when it’s dark outside. I can see so well in the dark because my magic of controlling the night gives me that special ability. But his body? It’s so special. Discord explained what he was; a Draconequus. A creature built up by all sorts of animals, forged into one. Nature’s plaything. They also had some strange magic Discord explained to be his ‘bad side’, and he didn’t want me to see it. Discord just said that I helped him control it.
I look down at the middle of the field to see him lying in the middle of the field, with his hands resting beneath his head. He has a serene expression, just staring at the night sky. I smile and land a couple of feet away from him.
’‘Beautiful, isn’t it?’’ Discord asked, still staring straight ahead at the sky. I laid down besides him and looked up, and then down at him.
’’It always is.’’ I smiled. He smiled back at me and sat up.
’’Oh, aren’t we being a little narcissistic, hm?’’ He grinned. I pouted and punched his shoulder playfully. He winced in mock-pain.
’‘Quiet, you.’’ I rested my head to the shoulder where I had just punched him. He chuckled and started brushing his eagle talon through my mane. I sighed and closed my eyes. I don’t know why it felt so relaxing to be with him, but I never complained about his company. Sure, he could be a little rude from time to time, but he makes it up by listening to everything I have to say, unlike Celestia, who is almost always too busy to listen to me.
’‘Luna..?’’ Discord whispered.
’‘Hmm?’’ I answered lazily, nuzzling into his shoulder.
’‘What would happen if... If your sister would find out about... Us?’’ Discord sounded like he was genuinely afraid of Celestia.
I choked on my breath, I hadn’t thought about what she would do. I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be happy about it, but I am also pretty sure that she wouldn’t do anything bad to him, I hope.
’‘We’ll find out if it ever happens.’’ I closed my eyes again and moved my head to his chest. His irregular heart-beats calmed my nerves.
’‘Alright.’’ Discord sighed and wrapped his arms around me.
-----
Luna was awoken with a start because of some heavy pounding on the door. She groaned and rolled off the bed and rubbed her eyes with her hooves. Luna stood up and walked to the door, while opening it with her magic. Her eyes widened at the sight of the pony standing outside.
It was Celestia, but her eyes were bloodshot and there were great bags beneath her eyes. Her flowing mane was hanging down her neck, barely twitching in the end of it.
’‘Celestia!’’ Luna exclaimed, making Celestia cringe and groan.
’‘Not so loud, please...’’ Celestia gritted her teeth.
’‘What’s wrong? Has something happened? Did Disco-’’ Celestia raised a trembling hoof to silence her rambling sister. To her relief, Luna stopped talking immediately.
’‘It’s nothing too bad, something may have happened but I’m not sure as I can’t remember that much from yesterday...’’ Celestia croaked. ’’I am completely sure that Discord has nothing to do with this, though.’’
Luna breathed a sigh of relief, Discord hadn’t done anything to her. ...yet. ’‘Then what’s wrong? You look terrible...’’ Luna remarked, making Celestia frown.
’’I am merely hung over from yesterday, as I... got some wine to drink...’’ Celestia shuffled her hooves awkwardly.
’‘How much did you drink?’’ Luna demanded.
’’I... I think it was seven bottles...’’ Celestia rubbed a hoof to her chin. ’‘Yes, that seems like it’s correct.’’ She shrugged. ’‘That’s beside the point of why I came here. I was supposed to go to Ponyville today to check up on my student’s planning for the Gala. But with me being in my current state, I am unable to go, so you will have to go to Ponyville today and check on the preparations.’’ Celestia turned around and walked back to her room. ’‘I’ll be in my room, napping. So when you leave, please don’t tell me as I need to sleep right now.’’ She walked into her room and closed the gilded doors.
Discord’s head poked around the doorway. ’’So, I heard something about Celestia being hung over?’’ Discord grinned and rubbed his hooves together.
’’Oh no you don’t...’’ Luna growled. ’‘Please leave her alone today?’’ Luna pleaded. Discord thought of it. Pissing off Celestia, but also pissing off Luna at the same time? Maybe it wasn’t worth it, after all...
Discord frowned and rolled his eyes. ’‘Fine...’’ Luna beamed and laid her left foreleg over his back, while pulling him closer towards her.
’’I presume you heard about me going to Ponyville for the day too?’’
’‘That I did.’’ Discord groaned. ’‘This day is going to be so boring...’’
’’I would love for you to come, but I doubt that the Elements of Harmony would be very happy about it. Besides, this is royal business...’’ Luna pouted as she thought of the young mares who hadn’t quite forgiven Discord for what he had done to them. She wasn’t mad at them for it, though.
’’Eh, I’m sick of that backwater-dump anyways.’’ Discord stretched his neck. Luna scowled.
’’Be nice, Discord.’’ She warned. Discord gulped and grinned sheepishly.
’‘Well, when you put it that way...’’
’‘Good.’’ Luna beamed and gave Discord a peck on the cheek. ’’I have to go now, but I’ll be back in a few hours, okay?’’ Luna released Discord and started walking towards the balcony, where she looked back at Discord, winked and flew off. Discord sighed heavily and trotted out from the room while glancing at the door to Celestia’s room.
’‘Well, she did say that she wouldn’t come back for a couple of hours...’’ Discord reasoned and trotted towards the solar princess’ quarters.
-----
In Ponyville, Big Macintosh was selling apples at the market, as Applejack had to talk with Twilight Sparkle about the upcoming Gala in Canterlot. So here he was, sitting by the small cart filled with all kinds of apple products. Applebloom was sitting next to him, eyeing everypony who passed the stand.
Mac sighed, lifted one of his massive forelegs to the counter and rested his head on it. Sales were slow today, and it wasn’t very exciting work just sitting around and selling apples. The only customers he had so far were only mares. He recognized some of them to be Rose, Daisy and Lily. All of the three mares winked and rolled their shoulders as they left him. He had no idea why. Maybe they were tired and their shoulders were sore? Mares...
A sudden commotion down the street bought his attention, he witnessed as a midnight blue pony with a dark mane landed not far from the library. He realized that it was no other than Princess Luna herself. He gasped and knew that this was the opportunity he needed to get hold of Disord. He was about to stand up and walk to her but he remembered that Applejack was still inside the library. He huffed and laid his head down on the counter. Applebloom was sitting next to him, humming a tune and rocking back and forth.
That’s when an idea formed. Macintosh cleared his throat, gaining the attention of his sister. ’‘Applebloom?’’
’‘What is it, big bro?’’ Applebloom stood up and beamed.
’‘Are ya a big pony?’’
’’‘Course Ah’m a big pony!’’ She exclaimed.
’‘Big ponies can handle th’ stand without anypony helpin’, so are ya a big pony?’’ Mac challenged her. He smirked as a determined expression washed over her face.
’’Ah can do it!’’ She started bouncing on the spot.
’‘Good, ‘cause that’s what yer gonna do for a couple of minutes, ‘kay?’’ Mac stood up and stretched his back.
’‘Really?’’ Applebloom squeaked.
’‘Really.’’ Mac chuckled and started walking towards the library, ready to wait for the lunar princess to leave. He felt bad about leaving the stand just like that, but desperate times calls for desperate measures. Besides, Applebloom couldn’t destroy that much.
...Right?
-----
Back in Canterlot, Discord had found the storage room of where the royal orchestra has their instruments. He looked past all the different kinds of instruments packed into the room. There were cellos, violins and a couple of instruments that he didn’t know the name of. In the corner of the room, he found the instruments he was interested in. He lifted the brass plates and inspected them for cracks or any damages, they were perfect.
He had arranged a little concert for Celestia, but the best part of it all was that Celestia didn’t know about it. He hit the cymbals once and grinned as the sound who came from them was more than enough for his plan. He packed them into a saddlebag he had found when he was inspecting the castle. He whistled a tune as he trotted out from the storage room and kicked the door to close it.
The cymbals clanked together as he trotted through the castle corridors. It had taken a few hours to find the right room that contained the objects of his interests, this was going to be hilarious. Well, at least he thought so. It was a big chance that Celestia would send him sailing through a couple of walls, but that’s a hit he was willing to take for a good laugh.
His smile grew even wider as he trotted into the familiar corridor where the rooms of the Princesses were. He dropped his pace until it was just a slow walk, making no sound at all. He had to hold a hoof to his mouth to stop his laughing as he opened the door to the Solar princess’ room.
Celestia was lying on her side, her mane was hanging limply down her swan-like neck. A puddle of what he suspected to be drool was just next to her head. Discord snickered and gingerly lifted the cymbals with his mouth and attached them on their respective hooves. As he had adjusted both of the straps to perfection, he stood up on his hindlegs and balanced with his wings as he took small steps closer towards the snoozing princess.
He bit his lip, not making a single sound at all as he raised his forelegs over her head. Celestia shifted in her sleep, making Discord stand completely still. As Celestia had settled again, Discord resumed his forelegs to their older position just above her head. Discord spread them, took a deep breath and sla-
’‘What are you doing?’’ A servant standing by the doorway stared at him. Discord’s eyes widened and he started stuttering, almost falling over from the surprise.
’‘Surprising her..?’’ Discord grinned sheepishly. The servant’s stare hardened, until it softened and the servant rolled her eyes and walked away.
’‘Whatever...’’ He heard her mumble as she walked down the hall. Discord sighed in relief and raised his forelegs over Celestia again, taking deep breaths and spread them again.
Discord slammed the cymbals together six times with all the strenght he could muster. Celestia’s eyes shot open and she sat up in a hurry. Discord noticed her sitting up and reached out with his left foreleg.
Celestia’s muzzle made contact with the cymbal, making her groan and curse. Discord burst into laughter, making Celestia stare at him with bloodlust in her eyes. Celestia started growling and stood up slowly, making Discord stop laughing gradually. She snorted two small balls of fire from her nostrils.
’’Oh shit...’’ Discord backed away from the now extremely agitated princess, until he turned around and bolted through the door.
A giant ball of fire chased him through the room. Celestia was not far away from him. Her entire body was covered in flames. She had only one thought at the moment.
’‘I wonder what fried Draconequus tastes like?’’
A/N: Pre-read and edited by frieD195! I feel bad for Discord right now. Oh well...
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Tata Its not a Draconequus anymore, its a Alicorn
also i don't feel sorry for him, he is getting what he deserves.
Great chapter as usual
----------------------------------
Lunar Justice
LOLZz.
that was a funny chapter man.
can't wait for the next one.
Big Mac is gonna kick himself in the morning
Celestia turned into gigantic fireball,check!
Sunglasses
s3.amazonaws.com/sgu-assets/assets/Content/1251906144/1473/PortalThumb.jpg
Check!
We need a picture of pissed fireball Celestia and troll faced Discord now...
His pranks are getting better and better. They're maybe becoming more simplistic in nature, but the effects are hillarious
"Oh shit..." fits it very well 
who does big mac want again?
I have two words for discord
YOU'RE
FUCKED
768060
Twilight.
768060 Twilight Sparkle. Something about her eyes, and some other stuff
768236 overiously your not romantic
768264 Of course. I spend my time reading books all day, and eating, sleeping, talking, breathing, bathing, and a lot of other stuff.
"I wonder what fried Draconequus tastes like?"
"Tastes like chicken your majesty."
Can anybody tell me how the he'll you crack your back. It is really starting to irritate the hell out of me!
I sware to the heartless son of a who created this reality and its obscene tendencies to be ironic/cruel ....
Small rage over. I'm really enjoying this, and you should feel good about writing this.
Oh man I was lauhing when you wrote about celestia drinking 7 wine bottles
verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/129042947290255574.jpg
Best. Discord fic. Ever.
The Gala needs to be a disaster as always, and bonus points if it isn't Discord who crashes it.
PS:Celestia is going to break everything isn't she and Luna is going to make Discord wish she killed him.
Ending: Priceless.
768537 CDR
Proper sentence structure is key. Well, that and my awesomeness.
"I wonder what fried Alicorn tastes like?"
"Tastes like Scootaloo, your majesty."
Yay for Discord being a troll I was snickering when he found the symbols and how the servant was basically like fuck it i quit caring great story
771678
"Cause of death?"
"Heart attack during a fit of laughter."
774269 I woke up in Rarity's bed, strapped down, with my mouth gagged, pantless. AHAHAHHA
769626
Holy crap, this is funny
Great chapter as well.
’‘I wonder what fried Draconequus tastes like?’’
You know so do I.
Chicken maybe?
Everything tastes like chicken!
You sir have truely written an epic story!
EPIC WIN!
784883
I think fried draconequus would taste like a little bit of everything, as they're made of so many different animals.
784989
HAHA!
YES! Well said!
All though the bat would be a bit weird along with the eagle and lion.
It would a very weird mix to eat. Hope Celestia enjoys it!
Exciting and no less than a fantastic story! I can't wait for some TwilightxBigmac!
Even through Big Mac is making a huge mistake going to Discord for help! *insert missing Discord emoticon, that really needs to be added*
767871 Oh man I so miss the ol Jack O'Neill jokes and sarcasm.
767718
Think of Discord as a ball of clay. You can change it's shape and form, but it is still clay.
"Luna was awoken..."
Change it to "Luna had been awakened..."
The liver is EVIL! It must be punished with BOOOOOOOOZE!!
RUN DISCORD! RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Shadow F.
i feel bad for discord now y should i he's evil!
oh well get him celestia 
Fly you fool!
"’‘Really.’’ Mac chuckled and started walking towards the library, ready to wait for the lunar princess to leave. He felt bad about leaving the stand just like that, but desperate times calls for desperate measures. Besides, Applebloom couldn’t destroy that much.
...Right?"
........ Ghauh maaan have you even watched the tv show??
lol
XD I def enjoyed this chapter more than the others so far. Just couldn't stop laughing.
768611
you crack your back by stretching backwards when it feels stiff
owwwwwwww cracked ribs plus pissing yourself laughing == baaaaaaaad