Swift Wind got lost in the Zebrican savannah. There he encounters a bipedal creature. Then he runs.
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The first chapter was written as a one-shot and I still consider it as such. If you want some more fluff after finishing it, feel free to continue reading.
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This story was heavily inspired by this BBC video about persistence hunting. Whether you like or dislike the story, please leave a comment and criticize away or I can't improve my writing.
Special thanks to joeSFX for helping me edit this story!
Chapters (4)
Well, now I want more
Very interesting, short and sweet. Are you planning to add anything to this? A little more would be nice but the story stands well by itself.
Kill it.
4709403
That means it worked!
4709622
Thanks! I have a general idea how it could continue, but I don't know, if I'll do it. Right now this was the part that popped into my head and punched me till I let it out
4710391 Then do it man!
We are RELENTLESS!!!
seriously though persistence hunting is a very old and extremely simple form of hunting and it makes use of a human beings superior endurance.
There is a lot of chance here for a nice continuation.
Take it.
Please.
For the love of god, take it.
...Is this your first fanfic? Seriously?
Naw, can't be. First fanfics are never this good.
4714513
I beg to differ.
Or maybe it was blind luck.
Great fic, by the way. Hope to see more.
Looks good for a first fic. Can't spot any major flaws with spelling or grammar... you may be overusing "the creature" a bit at the end, but that's about it.
Keep writing
4711601
4713844
The pressure, the pressure
4714513
4714581
4714560
Thank you and yes, it's my first
4711766
Humans, the Jason Voorhees of hunters
4714589
Thanks and I know. I just didn't want to outright say "the human" since the narration leans towards Swift Wind's perspective
4711766
It's also damn effective.
Why in the holy hell is this Complete?
4714958
Yeah, yeah, whatever...
Now, isn't it a little hot in here?
Don't you want to get out of those tight
icecaps that leave so little to imagination?
Come on, let us see your living parts.
More.
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/610/825/eec.jpg
And that, people, is how we became the apex predators of this planet. The most simple and effective mechanism to walk our quarry to death. No the most quick, or the easiest, but definitely the correct path. And then, our brains grew, we figured out copper, then tin, iron, and many others. Being smart is great. Thanks endurance!
As with the first one, feel free to comment. If you see any errors or have any criticisms, please let me know
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! More chapters!
4746426
The error is the word count, it seems to be under 100,000. Can you see to that?
http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_loas5iT3Ty1qzynlco1_500.gif
Good job. You got my attention. Please write more.
4746467
Oh, yes, sorry, I forgot to add in Pinkiiiiiiiie 97511 times
4746482
That is surprisingly fitting
4746515
Thanks! Well, one more chapter to go for this story
4746553 Please tell me I missinterpreted this and this is NOT a three chapter story. PLEASE!
4746603
Eeyup, three chapters, sorry
4746611 I hope that will be a good chapter...
4746648
Well, so do I
I like this. An accurate portrayal of humans as hunter-gatherers.
fedgeno.com/meme-generator/memes/500.png
4718821
4747819
Cookie? Potato? Cookie-flavored vodka!
4749642 fm.cnbc.com/applications/cnbc.com/resources/img/editorial/2012/04/16/47060962-Unusual-Vodka-Flavors-cookie-dough.jpg
Korohe is very well spoken. "Weird" is a word I would not expect him to use. "Strange" would be better.
4759871
Yes, that fits the contrast between Korohe's and Swift Wind's speech much better. Thanks
this story has earned 100% of my yes. i hope there will be more but am still happy if this is all you write
4761442
Thanks
There's one more chapter inbound, either tomorrow or the day after.
4764229 and there was great rejoice
As with the other chapters, feel free to comment. If you see any errors or have any criticisms, please let me know
4769814
Last time, you wrote to me this Story had only three chapters. But when THIS is everything, well... be ready to get a buck in the ass.
This Story is totally AWESOME! Don't stop there. This is one of the few Stories how can be totally EPIC!
4769814 Im sorry but i agree with the other guy. Please do more of this awesome stuff. This site has nothing like it and I find myself falling in love with the setting
I like how this story is presented. All we need now are some white colonists...*sees pony*...no, we're good!
Dumb humor aside, this is very enjoyable!
Ok, I said the third chapter would be the last, but I couldn't resist at least giving an outlook on the future. Thanks for all your comments and keep the criticism and feedback coming
4769831
Here, have an epilogue *straps pillows on his behind* Huh, I shouldn't have used superglue
4770047
Thanks, this comment means a lot to me because it means I achieved everything I wanted to do with this
Kinda sad that you pulled a short-stop on this story, but what we got was good.
Thank you for writing it.
4770684 When this is a outlook to the future, does that mean there is a chance for a Sequel?
And think good what the answer will be...
*gets ready to buck*
4770741
(seriously, everyone feel free to write that or other stories in the setting).
No, thank you for reading it
Sorry for "pulling a short-stop", as you said. Chapters 2-4 were pulled from ideas that I got writing the original story. I wouldn't have a clear direction now and that would show in the writing and the frequency of releases. I don't want to be the guy you have to wait 3 months on to get a mediocre thousand word chapter. Heck, the setting has so many possibilities, you could probably make an entire story just about the first caravan exploring, but that's a story I would want to read, not write
4770769
Well, the pillows are stuck there with superglue, so I should be safe either way
In all seriousness, though: I have no plans for a sequel. What started this story was the thought of "What would persistence hunt be like in Equestria?" I'll probably continue doing short stuff along that "How would X be like?" line...
So...
What about the minotaurs? How did they react to something that looks sort of similar to them? I'm just asking because you added the ponies, zebras and griffons, you even mentioned the dragons and changelings. Did you just forget about them?
4770887 And don't forget the Diamond Dogs.