canisloopis
Joined 8th Jun, 2014 ·
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Eh, it's not exactly my cup of tea, but it looks interesting.
Nice, you made me laugh and I scared my self
I'm curious as to why this has so many dislikes.... seems fine to me o.O
4804173 Grammatical errors and some awkward phrasing mixed with a generally disliked subject. Also, it's only a slight modification on the other story the author wrote—the protagonist even has the same name. To a lot of people, these issues add up to "sloppy self-insert only written for the author's pleasure." I'm just put off by the errors and execution, as content bothers me very little.
Come to think of it, there might be rules against resubmitting the same story under a different name, even if some of the chapters have been revised. I'm not sure if both stories are different enough to be safe. Why wouldn't you just edit the chapters of the first story? It's not like what gets published can't be changed.
Oh, almost forgot. A blood transfusion would get the genetic material transferred as well, and it would probably work better than sex. It might be tough to find the appropriate blood type, depending on how pony blood works. "Genetic material" is a pretty broad term.
I wrote the first story and was unhappy with it. The story did get quite a few favorites so I didn't want to remove it so those people couldn't read it anymore. I decided I would edit the parts I didn't like out of the first story and take it a different route. The original will be continned and lead in a completely different direction eventually, but this storyline is my priority.
Either I don't understand what a self insert is, or this isn't one. Of course if I were transported to Equestria I would never consider coming back. I would also have no qualms doing what the protagonist is concerned about either. Consider this a parallel narrative similar to the movie Clue's ending.
clever make spike question Twilight's decision
4804538 this is a good story I eagerly await the next chapter for this and the other story you wrote and that I liked and favorited is this the remake or is the other story? either way these are great stories I eagerly await the next chapters for these stories
This is a remake of my previous story. I received a lot of negative feedback saying I was rushing the clop so I rewrote it so one version would be more clop oriented and this one would be more centered around character development. I appreciate you nudging me for more content. It makes writing so much more fun when I know someone is looking forward to reading it.
That was a very good chapter of Derek coming to terms with his/her problem and the need to aquire pony genentics. Or she/he is just going through her first heat cycle. I eagerly await your next chapter
wow.... shes being an evil bitch right now.
this is both disgusting but ingenuis disgusting because twilight is feeding 'Dawn' male pony sex genetics and forcing her to crave it but ingenius because in a round about way if slighly sadistic way helping 'Dawn' to get home faster i think
I await your next chapter
I was LITERALLY just wondering about this fic when it updated.
5640644 I'm glad I could be of service.
stop
stahp
BULGING BEAUTY
PEC SMASHER
CRUNCH TIME
LEG DAY
FULL THROTTLE
and the reason you are upset right now is entirely her fault.
5647952
I'll take your recommendations under advisement... LOL
5647969
You have an excellent point. I wonder if either of them will realize...
LOL, I didn't put things together till the last parapraph.
img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130405221911/mlp/images/e/e1/FANMADE_Luna_I_see_what_you_did_there.jpg
5680592
I laughed out loud for about a minute.
Well that could be problematic.
"Wait you mean I just had to gobble love juice until I was a pony and you could change me back and send me home that afternoon?"
"Yup, and now that I've force fed you horse yay until you completed your transformation I can... uh oh."
"Uh oh?"
"You do know that getting a cutie mark wipes out any underlying magic, such as a botched transformation spell?"
"..."
"Don't panic! I'm sure I could transform you into something resembling a human on a temporary basis!"
what? .. what the buck?
.... I'm bored, i'm depressed. I'm going to read this.
Shouldn't the title be spelled "Inspiration" instead? And strange, that Twilight doesn't visit Fluttershy or that Fluttershy doesn't mention her houseguest to others.
6069744
Yes, thank you. And you have a good point. Thank you for your analytical thinking I really appreciate the critique.
The part with the coach makes the kid seem like an arrogant douche.
6071444 I have no clue what i've been reading... but I can't stop laughing through most of this fic!
Good job keep it up
Nope. Nu-uh. Sorry. Force-race changing, and Twilight happy about it and unrepentive, even after near raping another species? Nononononono. Just. No. Somehow, she needs to catch heat from Celestia, change him back, and send him home. If she keeps up this kidnapping/force-change on him, I will be sorely disappointed in her, to the point I'll lose all respect of her.
6071444
Continue?
4804173
rape is not everyone's cup of tea. many people cannot enjoy observing such action even if it was in fictional setting.
What the fuck is this? When does the dream sequence start? Which one is imagination? Why does twilight have a penis?
4945673
Sure, if you think hentai's plots are good.
So... twilight go on fucking spree to collect semen. Them cook it into pancake and feed it to derek with help of want it need it spell?
Well...
The fuck is this? Isn't she suppose to be animal expert.
Oh....