Remember to space out your paragraphs and whenever somepony is talking. Ex:

"Doesn't it remind you of her?" Fluttershy asked while holding a rainbow colored butterfly.

"Sugar cube, she's-" however Applejack stopped herself once she saw a tear trickling down her friend's cheek.

Hope this helps.

Seem's legit. But how many Fallout Equestria's are there?

War in the Equestrian Wasteland never changes... Or does it?
This is the tale of Stand Bold, a respected member of the Enclave. Head of Research and Development at Type 40 Industries, and Captain of his Infantry Company, 4/118th, Charliehorse.
Type 40, the company Stand Bold works for, is the primer targeting talisman producer for the Enclave. One day, a talisman malfunctions and starts targeting things it necessarily shouldn't have been. So who better to fix it than the inventor himself? Stand Bold reports to the vessel experiencing the glitch and begins work to fix the the blasted thing. But he discovers a plot that threatens the Enclave, the Wasteland, and countless lives across the globe. To further compound the problem, he can't remember a damn thing about any of it, and has been branded a Dashite! Can he find his lost memories in time to save the surviving world? Or will this evil plot plunge the wasteland into a millennium of darkness?

Just reading the description I have a lot to go over for this. I'll check the story out sometime.

I'll see if I can get down to reading this tonight.

5909342

Sounds good man, whenever you can. I'd certainly appreciate it.

I'll see if I can get down to reading this tonight.

Probably the biggest lie I ever told on the internet. I may be a critic, but I'm lazy.

I'll go ahead and read some right now since I'm probably not going to do it during the day.

5922766

It'salllllll good mate. I've been working my ass off in school. So I haven't even had a chance to really rewrite the second chapter anyway. I hope you enjoy it! And feel free to rip it apart. Bring the truth, no matter how bad it hurts.

5923065 I got that reference.

5923811

So did you have a chance to see the squalor that is my story?