• Published 14th Jul 2014
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My Life as a Changling - rainbowPOOTIS



Die, wake up as a some kind of changeling variant, and have to deal with ponys.

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Welcome to hel- er, parenthood

“HUAAAAAARG!” Yes, that was me vomiting. it appears changelings do not like alcohol. “Oh god why… HUAAAAARG!” It still rattled me that my vomit was composed of that bioadhesive I could spit up. In other words, I had blue vomit.

“Trixie wonders why you are vomiting.” Oh god, shes at the door. at least she sounds a tad bit livelier than earlier.

“Changelings and al-HUAAAAAARG! ...alcohol do not mix!”

the sound of the door being opened caught my attention in between my episodes of vomiting. “Hey Trix, is that Shinkiro in there?”

“Yes.”

“What’s with you?”

“Today I learned to never approach a famished emovore.”

Not sure if serious or bad attempt at humor. “Wait… are you saying…”

“I feel empty.”

“WHAT THE PLUCK SHINKIRO!”

“I don't… HUAAAAARG! ...Feel so good…” Everything was starting to spin, when to toilet bowl jumped up to hug me....


I was woken by something splashing over my face, and bolted upright. I was only able to get one of my eyes to open, and saw why. I had apparently passed out and falling into the toilet bowl, getting the left side of my face covered in my own bioadhesive.

“Good, you’re awake. you have any idea how to get that blue junk off your face? I’ve tried everything.” Gilda was holding a bucket in her talons, having splashed water all over my face. Trying to lick away the adhesive sticking my lips together, I noticed Gilda staring at me.

Once the last of the bioadhesive that had my jaw stuck shut was gone, I gave the griffon a look. “What?”

“Are you sure you're a changeling, and not some kind of shape shifting chimra? I mean, you look like a cross between a pony, a beetle, a manticore, way to many kinds of teeth, and you have a forked tongue! Whats next? Acidic urine!?” wait… I stuck my tongue out and actually took a good look at it. Well, damn.

“I don’t know about the last one, I don’t go to the bathroom. I just throw up this blue junk. On the plus side. its like having a built in liquid duct tape dispenser.”

“Ew.”

“Yeah… It’s pretty gross when you look at it like that.” I took the opportunity to lick my hoof and rub it against the adhesive still clinging to my face, feeling it begin to slowly dissolve. Once it was out of my eye, I cracked it open and winced a little at the light, squinting my left eye in an attempt to alleviate the pain. “I mean, I guess you could say that drinking got me pretty ‘shitfaced.’”

“That’s really disgusting… You’re disgusting.”

“Hey, it doesn't smell, its actually sanitary, and it make a great glue substitute. Its not any worse than an owl, unlike your smelly bacteria filled fertilizer.”

“Cute. Anyway. I want answers. Exactly what the pluck did you do to Trixie?”

“Ummm… I may have drained her of emotion after nearly depleting myself of energy.”

“You what?”

“It was instinct! I had no control, and I feel horrible for doing it!”

“Why did you even use up so much energy in the first place? you were fine yesterday.”

“I was ummm… experimenting with my shapeshifting. turns out the bigger something is, the more energy it takes to turn into. exponentially more energy. Unless I had some sort of source of infinite love energy, there is not a chance of me being able to transform into a dragon.” That was more than likely actually true, and it served its purpose of keeping Gilda from finding out what I was doing under the radar. “Is… Trixie getting any better?”

“Slowly, she went back to bed, said she was bored.”

“Thats good, shes feeling something now. I was afraid it might have been permanent. I don’t even really remember what happen up until I realized I had just drained her dry.”

“Its probably for the best. from what Trixie descirbed, you looked freaky as heck. your eyes were glowing yellow and you were salivating uncontrollably.”

Wait. “If I remember, after you saved my flank from the rockodile, you told me my blood glowed. I know its yellow allready, so that whole glowing eyes thing isn't that farfetched. in other words, if I have bloodshot eyes and am salivating nonstop, please keep me from doing something stupid again. I never want to actively feed off someone again.”

“Actively?”

“Ummm… if you didn’t know, I passively feed of anyone nearby, skimming off the excess emotion. Its like breathing, I just do it.”

“You’ve been feeding off us!? How long?”

“Like I said, its something I just do! I can’t turn it off! Why do you think I join Trixie on the stage after each performance? I’m not doing it for the recognition, I’m doing it so that I stay fed!”

Gilda relaxed and slumped her shoulders. “Sorry. Just… keep to the crowds.”

“I will.” I might need a ‘emergency stash’ in case I need to actively feed again, but where could I keep it that would be readily accessible, yet somewhere Gilda and Trixie wouldn't notice it?

… Am I really considering kidnapping somepony to use as an emergency source of emotional energy? But… when the eggs hatch, how will I keep them all fed? I don’t think I’m willing to go that far. What else could I do?

“Uhhh, Shinkiro? you there?” Gilda was snapping her talons in front of my face.

“Thinking about how I can keep my children fed. Emotions aren't exactly something you can buy at a store.” I can’t believe I’m even thinking of something like that. But I might have to do some ‘rather unsavory’ work. It feels so wrong to even think, especially since i used to be the guy. “Theres gotta be an option other then doing… that...”

“You’re not thinking about kidnapping are you?”

“No actually, I wouldn’t want to do that either, but its the only other option I have. its kidnapping or...” just the mere thought of it made me whimper and try to cover myself.

“...Or?”

“Or… that unsavory business.”

Gilda seemed a little sympathetic towards me. “If it really comes to that, I supposes you can… uh, feed off me. Only if it’s necessary!”

“That might keep me and a few hatchlings fed, but I probably still have more on the way.”

“Then you can put on a bigger show.”

“Gilda, stop and think. do you know what an insect hive is like? thats a lot of mouths to feed.”

“Well that isn’t an option either, I’m not letting my friend whore herself out for food. There has to be something else!”

If I can just hold out until the Empire reappears… “I don’t want to leave behind a family of orphans… Without me, they'd starve… just the thought makes me sick to my stomach. Please don’t let my babies suffer such a fate.

“I… no, of course not. But, are you really going to whore yourself out? I doubt that’ll be enough later on.”

“It seems like I… like I might not have any other choice… unless the rumors are true.”

“What rumors? I haven’t heard anything important.”

“Well its to do with the ponies. Lets just say legend has it that about a millennium ago, their was a great empire in the north, and at the very center of it, an artifact that protected the empire with the power of love. Unfortunately, that empire vanished into the earth, and legend foretold it would return a thousand years later. Within the year, if the rumors are true, it will have returned, and I might just have an endless supply of emotion energy waiting there for me and my children. Its a long shot, but its the only hope I’ve got to keep an entire hive fed.”

“I don’t know. That sounds to good to be true. And if it is true, if it’s protected by love. What make you think you’d be able to get in?”

“I doubt back then they ever considered an underground approach… or balefire.”

“I don’t know what that is. But, If the thing goes underground, then what?”

“Simple. Balefire burns through magic, as well as just about anything else.”

“Well, I’m not going to say I know anything about magic, But… That sounds incredibly stupid.”

“It’s my only option, sooner or later the swarm will grow too large to support by myself.” I paused, I could feel something. Whatever it was felt… like me, but its own separate entity at the same time .It was calling to me… wait. “Its happening.”

“What happ- Woah!” I rushed past her, straight to my little nest, where I saw the largest of the eggs wiggling, something moving inside. I could feel her prodding at my mind. there was no need for words, she knew I was there for her. “What going… woah, already?”

“Shhh! just watch.” I huddled down so that my face was inches from the egg, a smile growing on my face. I could hear a faint squeaking coming from inside, as the rocking motions of the egg intensified. It rocked backwards one last time before with a brief ‘thunk’ a horn penetrated the shell from the inside, causing cracks to spiderweb out. From there, the hole was widened with a hoof, before the eggs inhabitant peeked her head out, a piece of the shell balanced on her snout. I gently helped her by put my hoof where she could reach, and pull herself out of the egg. She looked so similar to me, the most noticeable difference other than size being the shade of her mane and eyes, and icey sapphire instead of the neon blue I had. what had me slightly concerned was how she felt slightly cold, so I held her close to me, and felt a small tug on my energy reserves. She wanted her first meal, and I happily obliged, letting her feel herself, feeling her warm up as she did so, before she returned my hug.

“How did you know she was trying to break out of her egg?”

“I could hear her… You wouldn't understand, but every changeling Queen has a hivemind, that all her offspring are connected to.” How I know these things continues to baffle me, just like how I so easily adapted to having an exoskeleton. The muscles are arranged completely differently, yet I’ve been moving fluidly since the first time I woke up!

Gilda seemed confused, but, either ignored it or didn’t care. All she asked was. “...What’s her name?”

“...Peeko.” upon hearing her new name, Peeko’s eyes seemed to sparkle in infantile curiosity, as she begun looking around the room, awed by the world outside the egg.

“Sounds about as strange as yours. I’ll go wake up Trixie, she might want to see this.”

“You do that. I just want to be with my daughter.” I took the opportunity to brush the piece of eggshell of her snout, causing her to giggle. The sound of her voice filled me with warmth, and I watched with amusement as her tail swung about like an excited puppy, while she batted at a strand of my mane.

The sound of hooves and claws said Trixie was up. “Trixie was told an egg hatched?” Her voice no longer sounded completely monotone, but it still lacked much emotion.

I took the time to carefully turn myself around, still holding Peeko in a one legged hug. “She’s… shes my little bundle of sunshine.” I felt my eyes watering, not in sorrow, but in joy. “Trixie, meet Peeko.” She stared at Trixie intently, completely fascinated by her.

“Trixie is impressed she hatched so quickly. How old was the egg?”

“I lost count, a few months?”

“Trixie is being stared at. Does Trixie have something on her face?”

“No, you don’t. Peekos never seen a pony before, considering she just hatched a few minutes ago.”

“Then why isn’t she ogling me too?”

I noticed Peeko had tilted her head and stuck her tongue out slightly, scrunching her face up in mock concentration.

The display made Trixie's eyes widen a bit, and I could sense something coming from her again. She found it adorable. That’s good, she’s getting better. “I see you're recovering nicely. Just please remember, If she starts acting like I did when I was starving, get me immediately., and don’t get too close to her.”

“Yes, Trixie does not wish to experience that again.” I picked up a bit of nervousness from her, meaning she really is starting to get better, as well as the fact she understood the severity of this issue.

"Good. Its okay right now, I just fed her. I think she wants to hug you, and I agree, you do look fluffy." Peeko gave a delighted squeal and giggled, before giving Trixie the dreaded puppy eyes.

She huffed in annoyance, but her emotions said otherwise. Regardless, she still scooped up Peeko and hugged her, letting Peeko bury her face in her fur. Peeko giggled, and took the opportunity to lick Trixie's face, leaving a trail of bioadhesive, before making a disgusted noise and begun trying to get the bits of fur off her tongue.

“Trixie feels like there’s something on her neck, what is it?”

"You just got slimed." Trixie passed Peeko back to me, and held a hoof to the affected area. "I wouldn't do that if I were you." Too late. Trixie touched the blob of goo, and she tried to pull her hoof away, she couldn’t.

“Trixie is stuck!”

I snickered. "I warned you. You do realize that apparently changeling saliva is the only way to get that off?" I stuck my tongue out slightly, giving her a grin.

“Trixie will get it off on her own!”

"Fine, just ask Gilda. She tried to get it off my face and was met with no success whatsoever.”

Trixie looked to Gilda for support. “Yeah, that stuff doesn’t come off. Ever. Just let her do it, I just found out she pukes that stuff out, instead of going to the bathroom like normal.”

"By the way, thanks for saving me from potentially drowning in my own adhesive vomit."

"Trixie is disgusted! Get it off me immediately.” Not wanting fur on my tongue, I instead licked my hoof, and proceeded to rub the saliva into the slime that held Trixie's hoof to her neck, watching as I begun to dissolve. Once it was gone, I gave her a little smile.

"All done!"

“Trixie will be in the shower. With industrial disinfectant.”

Author's Note:

so it begins...