• Published 10th Apr 2012
  • 9,889 Views, 239 Comments

AAAAAAAAAAAAArientation - BillyColt



All the stallions are gay for Braeburn.

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Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Over in Carousel Boutique, Caramel and Lucky Clover held out a length of fabric while Rarity measured the length.

"I cannot thank you two enough for helping me with this," she said.

"Oh, don't mention it," said Caramel.

"We're always perfectly happy to help," said Lucky. "Anytime."

"And I'll have you know how much I appreciate it," said Rarity, taking a pair of scissors and beginning to cut the fabric. The two stallions exchanged pleased glances. The door to the shop rang.

"Oh, Clover, could you be a darling and go see who that is?" asked Rarity.

"Certainly, ma'am," said Lucky as he turned to answer her request.

"Anything more I can do to help?" asked Caramel.

"Mmm..." she hummed. "Thank you kindly, but I think I'm quite alright."

"Well, howdy!"

Rarity stopped cutting. She recognized that voice.

"I just saw how fancy this place was, so I decided I'd pop in and say hi. Nice home you got here."

"Well, it actually isn't mine..."

Rarity had to step out into the main room. Sure enough, there was Braeburn, eyeing the place.

"Though I can't say it's really the kinda placed I'da live," said Braeburn. "I'm a much more rugged stallion than that."

"Yeah..." said Lucky. "Rugged..."

"Well, hello!" Rarity said. "You're Applejack's cousin Braeburn, right?"

"Indeed Ah am, ma'am!" Braeburn said, putting his nose up with a self-satisfied smile.

"Never can forget a vest like that," Rarity added.

"Yeah, that is a sweet vest," said Caramel.

"The hat's nice, too," said Lucky. "Where'd you get them?"

"Aw, didn't get 'em nowhere. Just good old-fashioned hoof-made pure goodness! Straight from my father."

"He must've had good hooves," said Caramel.

"I'll bet you got good hooves, too," added Lucky.

Rarity watched the banter back and forth, unsure of what to make of it. Three stallions in the room and Rarity wasn't the center of attention. She had the sneaking suspicion that something wasn't completely on the up-and-up.

***

"Uhh, Applejack..." said Twilight.

"'Uhh,' nothing, Twi," said Applejack. "We need to find him, and we need to get him out of here now!"

"Sis, yer overreacting," said Big Macintosh, stepping up next to her.

"Big Mac, you know what happens!"

"Uhh, what happens?" asked Twilight.

"He turns ponies gay!" Applejack shouted.

Twilight stared at her for a good twenty seconds. Then...

"BAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA! Ohhh, Applejack, that..." Twilight saw her terrified expression. "That's for real?"

"Well," said Big Macintosh, "it's mighty odd, but ever since Braeburn was just a little colt, whenever he was over the other colts were just mighty friendly 'round him. Then when he got older, well..."

"So..." said Twilight, "other stallions find him attractive? What's so strange about that? I mean, he's a good-looking guy..."

"Straight stallions, Twi," stressed Applejack. "Like, he makes them forget they like girls."

"But that doesn't make any sense..." said Twilight.

"Nope," said Big Macintosh.

"But it just... is... kinda like Pinkie Pie's Pinkie Sense..." Applejack mulled it over.

"Actually..." Twilight pondered, "you might be onto something there!"

"I might?" Applejack asked.

"Passive earth pony magic," said Twilight. She ran back into the library for a quill and paper. "Think of this kind of discovery! Let's find Pinkie Pie!" And with that, she bolted out the door.

"But what about Braeburn?" Applejack called after her.

***

Braeburn left the boutique with Caramel and Lucky Clover on either side of him.

"Mighty courteous of ye two to offer to show me 'round Ponyville," said Braeburn.

"Oh, not a problem!" said Lucky.

"Pleasure's all ours!" said Caramel.

Rarity watched from the doorway, completely stupefied. It was as though those two ponies, who she'd normally had wrapped around her hoof... had just blown her off.

"Well, I never thought I'd see the day!" she exclaimed to herself. Still, she supposed that there was nothing amiss.

She returned to her boutique, looking at the work she had done on her new line of clothes. Somehow she wasn't completely satisfied with it, but revisions, revisions, and more revisions were the hard work of any true artist. She went to her calendar to check up on her schedule, and found that she had an appointment for later that day. Watercolor, a local artist, had requested that she pose for a portrait.

Well, she thought, that's quite a bit of flattery. Not that she was any stranger to flattery.

She chose a nice hat to take with her to the artist's studio. Didn't hurt to come looking one's best, after all. She decided that the care and dedicated attention of a portrait artist would be just the remedy to the callous disregard of her other male friends.

As she walked through the town, however, she noticed that the mares seemed to be congregating around town.

"Can you believe it?" one asked. "I'm talking, and all of a sudden he just stops listening..."

"Like his mind wandered..."

"And he says 'look, you're just not my type.' Huh? We've been together for three years!"

Puzzling... Rarity thought. I may look into this further. But for now there was her appointment with the artist. She opened the door of his studio, stepped inside, and let out a gasp of pure shock.

***

Twilight, Big Macintosh, and a very nervous Applejack made their way to Sugarcube Corner, where they found Mrs. Cake looking at a highly unstable Pinkie Pie.

The pink party pony was rolling around on the floor, laughing uncontrollably.

"Uhh... did we come at a bad time?" asked Twilight.

"Worst time possible..." said Applejack.

"I don't know what just happened," said Mrs. Cake. "Everything was normal until just a few minutes ago. Then she just started laughing."

"AAHAHHAHAHHAHAH!" Pinkie Pie laughed. "Funny bone being tickled means... heeheee... snnnkt! That... AHAHAHHAH, that ponies are gayhayahyhayhay!"

Twilight, however, saw something was amiss. "But wait... Big Macintosh?"

"Eeyup?"

"How come you aren't affected?" she asked.

"Ah am affected," said Big Macintosh. "That don't mean I start actin' fruitier than an orchard of apple trees. Look, you folks'r overreactin'. Cousin Brae is here, it'll cause a lot of confusion, and then he'll leave and it'll be lahk nothin' happened."

"Wait, what?" asked Mrs. Cake. "What's going on?"

"Well, Mrs. Cake," explained Twilight, "it would appear that Applejack's cousin Braeburn has a passive magical property that causes an unusual effect when he is in the presence of a heterosexual male pony. That is, it appears that it turns that pony's heterosexual attraction into homosexual attraction, presumably aimed at Braeburn himself."

Mrs. Cake blinked. "Uhh, excuse me?"

"He's turning the stallions gay," said Applejack.

"Ooh! Ooh!" said Pinkie Pie, jumping up. "That means we'll have a lot of ponies coming out, and you know what thaaat means?"

The other four stared at her. Pinkie Pie took a deep breath.

"A COMING OUT PARTY!"

Mrs. Cake, however, was not amused. "I need to find my husband!"