You usually find comfort in your routine. Your house is nice and orderly, your wardrobe is tastefully practical, even your job at Quills and Sofas is calm and stable. Your life in Ponyville is one on the sidelines, watching as everypony else lives out their lives in (usual) peace. The odd exception comes from some form of disaster or villain, but it's always dealt with by Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends.
Now, ponies start going missing, and everypony is tense. Despite her best efforts, Twilight is unable to help her subjects as the criminal eludes her. Who will be next? Is anypony safe?
This fanfic is written for "The Most Dangerous Game" contest, organized by Obselescence. The topics that I decided to use were:
-An Alicorn OC
-Second Person Perspective
-An OC and a major canon character (such as one of the Mane Six) fall in love with each other.
Enjoy
Is it my imagination, or did "my" name change between the first two chapters?
4636891
Whatever are you talking about? I see no glaring mistake in the introduction of the main character.
Thanks for pointing that out; I would have really been embarrassed if that had gone unnoticed!
Short but cute. There were a few things that could have gone better, but all in all, I liked it.
You did the characters fairly well, you were nice and descriptive, but the dialogue seemed a little forced. I think a bit more time spent on the abduction bit, maybe spread it out over a day or so in the story. And there didn't seem to be much buildup at all with the romance side of it aside the single scene in the first chapter. It just seemed too quick and easy. In the end though, it's a nice little adventure with a dash of romance.
7/10
Not bad though, I am pretty picky.
I'll be looking for more from you!
DWNL