When a portable teleportation device is created. Twilight soon discovers that she's doomed her friends to death in three days! Now it's up to each of the Mane 6 to make their peace, and for Rarity to help Rainbow Dash seduce one very pretty dentist.
Yeah, this follows the TF2 thing pretty closely for the Rarity/Dash parts. It's such a good structure that I couldn't help but maintain it. This is the cheesiest thing I have ever written, and I am so very sorry.
Inspired by this image: http://gray--day.deviantart.com/art/Expiration-Derp-463498671
Oh look, I read it aloud too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYQRg8Goohk
(Based on Expiration Date)
Chapters (1)
Oh my Celestia, this is AWESOME
this was funny
....... Best story ever!!!!
I love it!
Words can't describe how awesome this is...
There's not much difference between this and Expiration date (TF2). A few changes here and there to make it appropriate for their genre and there is little enough creativity to make it more different then ED TF2. All I manage to get from reading this is a readable version of ED, with Ponies. It still simple funny ha ha, just not funny OMG MY GUT induced by the original ED. Good enough for a one time read and few amusement.
Inclusion of Derby is weird since it sound like you just put her there for Soldier tie in, and I find that is somewhat insulting that you put her into such a simple mindset, although that just me liking Derby in general. Colgate romance with RD? Meh
4607378 I appreciate the critique, and thank you for the honesty.
As for this being really close to ED, that was sort of what I was aiming for. I don't often write comedy, and the image used for the cover was something I really wanted to put to paper. Plus, placing Rarity and Dash in Scout and Spy's shoes was just too good of a chance to pass up. Twilight and Fluttershy's scenes are my favourites, and I wish I'd done more with them.
I apologize if derpy's mindset was offensive, and I love that wall-eyed mare as much as the next guy, but taking her to the next level of silly seemed like a good idea for comedic purposes, though it probably wasn't.
As for Colgate? I needed a Unicorn, and a dentist was the only thing I could think of that would be super far out of her league. Plus I think it's kinda cute.
Thanks again,
-Mint Copy
This is 100% Pyro approved
i.imgur.com/SaPtGf6.gif
Am I the only one who got that Wreck It Ralph reference?
Oh, and by the way:
Colgate:
RD
You made RD lesbian.
I can't tell you how many people make that mistake. 
Either make one of them male or make Rainbow's description say that she's lesbian.
That was AWESOME...... Fungeon
Pretty much the same thing, but still awesome! I still kinda liked the original version better though. This version seemed slightly rushed.
I LOVE IT!!!
A.) Nice joke
B.) Nice Metal Gear Reference.
This is awesome! I loved the original video so this is super cool!
Didn't have the "Minus we're not bread" part 0/10
When you get the reference.