• Member Since 19th May, 2012
  • offline last seen June 29th



The Doc says I should start a journal. It'll help me quit smoking, he says. Well, it's a new year, I might as well start a new habit, right? What's the worst that could happen?

WARNING! Contains psychiatric abuse, a mention of a suicide attempt, a mention of an attempted rape, self-injury, foul language, and *gasp* MILD SHIPPING!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 24 )

I can think of little more terrifying than not being able to trust my own mind. This wonderful piece you did reminded me of the film: "A Beautiful Mind". And it caused some of the same horror.
Thank you for sharing.

God this was stunning. Headcanon fully accepted.

EDIT: OH GOD I JUST GOT THE PUN IN THE TITLE LAWL! Honestly, if it weren't for the site's messed-up tagging rules, I'd swap 'dark' for 'comedy.' Half of this story had me grinning like a loon.

Honestly, this is one of the rare fictions I get to see where Screw isn't really insane but actually a sane pony with a problematic disorder. The execution was neatly set. I didn't realise that Buttercup was actually Cup Cake until you revealed more about her. I couldn't say much about the grammar though, since it might be her way of writing.

But if you do write like this, I highly suggest you should use italics or bold letters instead of capital letters. Also, it's greatly recommended that you should use only one punctuation per statement (excluding '...'). That way, your story would seem a bit more 'professional' in a sense. I'm not a proofreader though, but a newbie pre-reader. I'm certainly interested in seeing your next planned sequel. :ajsmug:


Wow, thank you! Although I must admit I had.... issues with that film. :rainbowderp:


Hee hee, I'm a sucker for bad puns. I'm so glad you enjoyed it! And, yeah, I wanted to tag it as comedy too (especially while I was imagining Scootaloo carving a giant dong) but I thought that would mislead and upset some readers.

Half of this story had me grinning like a loon.


Thanks for the advice! I hate capslock too, but it seemed appropriate for how the character would write... I'll think it over, and might edit later. But I'm not entirely sure what you meant by "you should use only one punctuation per statement"---were you referring to the dialogue or the prose?


Is that bad???

Why, this year I've written three journal entries and already I feel ever so healthy!!!

You don't need three exclamation marks or question marks. Technically, it's already wrong in a writing sense (unless it's '...' , which means that the character haven't had the chance to finish speaking).

That's...not sad. It's an incredibly happy ending, more than I ever thought possible for this character. I may be confusing tragedy with sad, but still it's an incredibly happy ending. Great story, really, really great.

I don't think I've ever read anything that's punched me in the heart this hard. The fact it's based on real events in your life made me deflate a little. Here's a Pinkie to cheer you on! :pinkiesmile:

Makes me wanna write a fic about somepony living with an older brother who suffers from religious mania and paranoid schizophrenia. Dunno how the fuck I'm going to write that... or even if I want to. It'd probably just make me too sad to finish the story.


You do realize this is all meant to look like a journal entry? I know lots of folks who write like that.

Had a bit of a meaty post typed up, but it got too personal concerning your past and KBoard and shit, and I didn't feel right in showing the whole world, so I'll PM ya.

Tldr was a good read more plz

That was a god damn masterpiece.

Fucking loved every second of it. It's hard to get me this captured in a fic anymore, but you did it.

I was tearing up in places, laughing like an idiot in others, and all in all enjoying it.

You did a fantastic job.

I was smoking while I read this.

This is awesome stuff. This is fantastic stuff. This is motherfucking beautifully written stuff. This is stuff that deserves to be a smoking read. I love your characterization for Screw Loose, I love the relationships you've created for her, I love how absolutely real and fantastic she feels, how she reminds me of people I know.

Let me know when that motherfucking sequel/prequel/interquel comes out. Please. This is too good of a characterization to waste. Please please please.

Wow. Just wow. My brain is still kind of going through shock. I haven't read anything like that, ever. This was probably one of the most touching, bittersweet stories I've ever read. Screw Loose felt like a real person to me, and you've brought a character alive like I've never seen before. Congratulations. You just won all of my respect and admiration.

You should advertise this shit.


Wow... sorry it took me so long to reply, but your comments just blew me away! Thank you so, so much!


Ha! How? And where?

5052606 I put it on my page in my little hall of fame/favorite stories

it's fucking great

This story is the epitome of why I still lurk around here.:pinkiesad2:

I'm almost crying here. As someone with PTSD who's lost a baby and tried to push that memory out of my head (to the point of developing amnesia) until the past year, this story has moved me in ways I can't believe. I can relate so well with her, and I don't even have the words to accurately portray how this story makes me feel.

Heh heh! (chuckle of self gratification) Finally found a chapter of something you wrote I hadn't read yet. Too bad I have to finish it later ...:twilightoops:

Very well written; touches nicely on the subject. The characters are also true to themselves, the writing is good, and the dialogue feels natural.

Wow, that hit hard. How has this story not got more upvotes?!

Thank you so much!

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