When Twilight left, following after Applejack, I didn’t blame her one bit. And as the minutes ticked by, and I found myself still waiting, alone, I couldn’t help but view it as a positive sign, one bright light in this night that had otherwise gone so horribly awry. Surely, that meant they were talking, and had stumbled upon a subject worth conversing about in depth. Surely they were managing to salvage things.
...Or Twilight was still standing frozen in a corridor as she diligently tried to work up the nerve to track down an Applejack who had already left for the farm.
My hooves shifted, tapping against the floor. That was… unlikely, of course. Probably. Surely! Possibly?
I couldn’t do much but wait, regardless. I’d have to put my faith in Twilight. She had not been made a Princess for nothing. She was clever, and brave, and always had the most ineffable knack for coming through when it counted.
But that meant sitting alone in the bedroom-slash-party-area, where my thoughts couldn’t help but drift to worries and guilt. I tried to distract myself, first critiquing the room’s decor, making plans to send for some satin curtains in a nice aqua, to brighten up the whole flow and better match the old bookcases that Twilight had insisted on adding. It seemed like she had ensured the addition of shelves to nearly every room in the castle, which gave it all a definite… Twilight-ness, most certainly, even if it made my attempts to establish contrasting themes on a room-by-room basis quite awkward.
But solving this room’s fashion problems was a trivial task, and could only hold my attention so long. And without any of my notebooks or access to my fabric, I couldn’t do much in the way of brainstorming for my fall line of apparel— Who was I kidding? I was already months ahead on that too.
So I sat and thought, which inevitably led to analyzing the events of the night. What I had said. How, precisely, I had said it. What I could have done differently.
As preposterous as it may seem, I had the best of intentions, I swear.
I did feel bad in partially deceiving poor Applejack and Twilight, but from the very beginning I had their own interests in heart. Perhaps that makes me arrogant, or meddling. I’ve certainly been called that and worse. But they’re my friends! I couldn’t help but love them and want them to be happy. Together, if that’s what it took.
Of course I knew how Applejack felt about me. Unlike certain others, I am astute enough to see the quiet signals, to note the touches that linger too long, the gazes that drift into a wistful longing. And not just from my admiring farmmare – I had picked up on Twilight’s own rather apparent infatuation with Applejack some time ago.
It was painful, watching, waiting. Seeing Twilight dance around her feelings. I had begun to assume she would never act, up until she knocked on my door asking for advice. Of course, she had just about run herself ragged in thinking and overthinking the situation. She needed help. She asked for help. I could not leave a friend in need.
I had come into the night expecting a certain amount of difficulty in navigating such personal topics, yes, but I didn’t think it would go… quite like it had. Of all the times for Twilight to work up the nerve to push Applejack! I had hoped to gently guide Applejack through her feelings. To allow her to admit her preferences in a safe environment. To help her see the more practical opportunities right there waiting for her. I had never expected her to confess to me so immediately and singlemindedly, but… that was certainly our Applejack.
I had simply done what I thought necessary. And… that wasn’t a justification. Affairs of the heart are never simple, and I was a fool to think otherwise. I could only hope—
No, I told myself, earnestly trying to convince a still guilty mind. Applejack would be fine. She was strong. She would bounce right back, and Twilight had gone to her side after all. Everypony knows that it’s preferable to rip the bandage off immediately. If I had tried to be gentler, if I had strung her along or tried to preserve her feelings, things might have wound up differently. Ponies would have been hurt. Or… Or, I might have...
No, this was the way it had to be.
I sighed, the sound loud in the quiet room.
I just wish I didn’t feel so horrible all of a sudden. I couldn’t imagine why, but my thoughts more and more turned to red on a field of orange. The more that I assured myself that I had done the right thing, had the right reasons, the more a tiny voice somewhere deep inside cried out the contrary. What if I was wrong? What if I had been wrong from the very beginning? I knew the path I had chosen, but what had I left behind?
It’s not odd, I told myself. It was perfectly reasonable and normal to briefly reflect on the could-have-been. Thoughts drifting to lovely fall days split between farm and boutique. Of the difficulties that we would have faced, but could have worked through with a mutual trust and love. The time spent in quiet companionship, as sensibilities rustic and urbane melded together to make something entirely new. Even the fights. Celestia help me, but I couldn’t help but enjoy even the infuriating spats with her.
I loved all my friends, don’t get me wrong, but Applejack… Applejack was certainly special to me. For as much as I could be overly dramatic, it seemed like she never failed to know right when to play along, right when to cut through the theatrics with a sharp word, and, most amazing of all, right when I was truly hurt and needed a shoulder to cry on.
She was always a joy to be around, bringing light and laughter to any day. I recall the Gala, long ago, when I was enraptured with foolish swooning over that horrible Blueblood and yet it was a brief word with Applejack that brought me the one genuine smile of the night. She was there, diligently running her food stand, always thinking of others above herself.
Of all the stallions I had chased, had any of them ever really been her equal? Even all put together, could they match her strength, determination, or work ethic? And her honesty, never a thing used to hurt or tear down, but always building up. Kind thoughts to refresh and reinforce, an encouragement to lead you to believe you could be a better pony, all the while as you knew her words to be absolute truth.
I realized that my eyes were dripping for some reason. I dabbed at them gently, not wanting to smear the tasteful amount of makeup I had applied for the night.
I was being a silly pony, of course. Applejack was everything that I wasn’t. Where she was open and honest, I built my life on facades and veneers, carefully calibrating everything about myself for the sake of others. I do not mean that as a criticism of myself, nor pure braggadocio.
I had worked very hard to be the pony I was today. I had diligently crafted my identity piece by piece over the years, always endeavoring to be the right pony in the right place at the right time. The refined socialite, always with the authority and demeanor to dispense careful advice when needed. The local business owner, well-off and friendly enough such that nopony would turn down my charity out of concern or pride. The normal, well-adjusted mare, well-versed in the details of romance – a virtuous maiden in the classical sense: elegant, beautiful, and of course, straight.
My thoughts choked out with a bitter taste in my mouth.
...At times I envied Applejack’s innate ability to just be herself. She had such a lovely self, after all.
I sniffed. She would be happy, though. In all honesty, she and Twilight made for quite a pair themselves, Applejack’s steadiness grounding Twilight’s occasional eccentricities, and Twilight’s innate practicality and reasonableness preventing Applejack’s lapses of stubborn self-reliance. As long as those two could break through their infuriatingly guarded exteriors and connect, I was willing to bet that they would be a positively delightful couple.
If only I could shake the rather silly image of myself in the picture, instead of—
The door banged open, and Twilight stumbled in. The poor dear looked dazed, and I instantly rushed over to be at her side.
“Twilight! Darling! What’s wrong? Did it not go well?” I took a deep breath, my heart beating fast as I started running through the best ways to comfort her, to help build up her no doubt shattered confidence. “Dear, there are many ponies in the sea, you know, and—”
“I got a date,” she said, sounding amazed at the words coming out of her own lips. Her eyes focused on me, and a smile spread across her face. “Rarity! I got a date!”
She grasped both of my forehooves in her own and spun me around, face lighting up with giddy excitement. “Yes yes yes!” she happily chirped. Suddenly she stopped. “A-are you okay?”
“Of course, darling,” I murmured. “I’m so happy for you!”
That’s what the tears were for. Happy tears.
I had my business, my career, my friends. I had been blessed enough as it is. If helping others required me to make certain sacrifices, give up certain desires, push aside idle notions of futures that could have been. Well...
There’s truly nothing that I wouldn’t do on behalf of my dear friends.
Generosity, indeed...
Well if it ends here that is alright, but it does feel like there can be more. Overall the switching of perspectives was done well and it was quite feels-y without being overly so for a "sad" story.
What a wonderful chapter! You me me feels!
It is a unique glimpse at the cost of generosity. Can't help but respect and pity rarity...
Well done...
Cuz'n.
Indeed we shall go bowling...
Soon...
NEvermind
Poor Rarity... I vote they go with polygamy in the sequel.
Knew this was where it was going. Didn't stop it from being painful. Poor Rarity, you'll find a lovely mare some day.
Bittersweet sadness. Rarity and Applejack truly do belong together...
Good job on a really moving short story.
Wait...that's...it?
Well, "it's nice"...but I am left wanting more. In the way that when you go to a super-fancy restaurant and order something that looks amazing...and the quality ends up meeting your expectations 100%, but the entree is about 1/3 the size you were expecting.
Still, a nice story. Nice.
Great story! Wonderful introspection from each character in their chapters, and great character interaction.
Others who demand neatness and closure will complain, maybe, but I liked that it ends where and how it does. Real life is never really simple and clean, and in stories that examine characters and their dynamics the way this does I prefer that certain amount of realistic ambiguity that leaves us with room to continue exploring onward in our own thoughts about these things.
Wonderfully done!
Those who want more (or poly) are missing the point. It ends where it should, where it has to. With a final twist of the knife.
Ah, Rarity. Ah, ponies.
4601853 I agree with this pony.
I don't know...
This is gonna be one bad love triangle; wants -> Who also want's -> But wants to be straight.
Also want's the other two to get together: <-->
This will only end in tears for one of the three, or a cliche but happy three way polygamous relationship
Oh ow... that was brutal... I had a feeling that was where you were going with it, but you did it so WELL... ow man! My heart aches for Rarity!
Aw... I was actually hoping that it would be the full circle "doomed love triangle," and that Rarity had been hiding her feelings for Twilight.
Wouldn't really have changed anything, but I just would've liked the symmetry, I guess.
4602830
Rarity was the most difficult part of this entire story, and the subject of a great deal of thought and revision, in both her chapter and the previous two. I'm still not certain we got it precisely right, but I also feel like the third chapter is really pretty key to the story as a whole.
My goal in writing this was specifically to play with those fundamentally unrealistic underlying tropes that shipping stories rely on (even though I enjoy and make use of them plenty, myself!). I wanted to do something that was a little more difficult and real-feeling, where things aren't guaranteed to work out right and people get hurt and that matters. I'm glad to hear that I achieved some measure of success there.
...Unfortunately I just can't really see continuing. Short-form is my forte, and in writing this story, I perhaps deliberately took advantage of the fact that I could create problems and leave ambiguities hanging without ever having to deal with them. I don't know that I could do it justice in a longer story... though I think that would be a story I would like to read as well.
I can't help but feel that Rarity repressing feelings in the first place seems... tacked on. A little thing about her knowing how both of them felt, and helping them along, would've been stronger, I think. Right now, the situation feels entirely too predictable. (that is, Rarity's part).
Sequel? please?
4603407
I don't know that Rarity could be truly and unreservedly supportive without negating the point of having a third chapter - I'm not sure how it'd actually say anything that hadn't already been said. That being said, I definitely think you have a legitimate point of view. The very first draft of this idea did not have the third chapter at all, and was only concerned with Applejack and Twilight, and that arrangement might have come across as more true-feeling.
The difficulty (and... in a way, I think, strength?) of Rarity's chapter is that it's more ambiguous compared to Twilight/Applejack's very clear motivations. Is Rarity suppressing strong feelings that she has held all along? Is she suddenly realizing a muted longing only because Applejack is now something she knows she can't have? The answer is somewhere in-between, but in the moment of being alone with her thoughts she's feeling something - or at least that's how I tried to thread the needle in writing it. Whether or not I succeeded is up to the reader to decide.
4603479
Chapter 3 is the prize.
Saw chapter 3 coming, though I was half expecting it to be Rarity giving up Twilight rather than Applejack. Still was solid.
or
I really find that hard to believe.
If Rarity really was intending to bring Twilight and Applejack together, considering she was aware of Applejack's affection for herself, why would she hint Applejack to reveal her true feelings for a 'mare', as she had emphasized? In hindsight, that just seems plain dumb.
Rarity was nagging Applejack on and on to be honest with herself, all the while Twilight was rapidly shifting her eyes towards Rarity, instead of smiling straight towards Applejack or lowering her eyes to the ground.
Of course the situation could only end in Applejack revealing her feelings for Rarity instead of Twilight, since everyone in the room seemed to stir her this way.
I mean how stupid can Rarity be? There is a mare who has a strong affection for her, but is too shy to admit it openly. So instead of directing AJ's interest to another mare, or giving Twilight a shove to reveal her interest in Applejack, Rarity blindly asks AJ specifically of a mare that she has feelings for, despite appearently knowing very well that Applejack had a strong affection towards herself.
While this all was only to confirm AJ's interest in mares, Rarity handled the situation in order to extract this piece of information from her, in an absolute horrible 'fashion'.
Pardon me Rarity, but 'well-versed in the details of romance' up my azz, honestly.
4606509 Or she was just in denial and was subconcoustly picking her words in such a way, it was probably pretty close to a fraudian slip but a lot more subtle.
4606673
Still... considering the initial goal of this conversation, she just messed up big time.
Therefore 'well versed in romance' up my butt.
4606820 and you expect someone in denial to NOT mess up big time?
4606862
To put it in words Rarity would understand:
If one person strictly deems themselves highly educated in proper behavior and 'well-versed in the matters of romance', they may also show sufficient restraint to avoid such slip ups period, as they would only complicate their generous intent to aid a good friend.
Judging by the end, she did envy them.
But if her intent was to help out a friend in something she deemed herself 'well- versed' in, this 'slip up' of hers questioned her credibility on this matter, discrediting herself for being incompetent.
Therefore, 'well-versed in romance' up my azz.
Besides she was either mischievously or sternly looking at Applejack while trying to extract the information if she is interested in mares.
So If she knew that honesty would surface AJ's affection for Rarity, an affection Rarity knew of before head as it turns out, and if her intend was to help Twilight and possibly NOT hurt Applejack in the process, judging by how sad and afraid Rarity was when AJ began to propose and how she stammered 'No' already, then why did she try to bring up the matter the way she did in the first place?
Coming up with the wrong idea suddenly at the moment is one thing, but this sleepover was planned in foresight to confirm which way Applejack's barn door swings, despite Rarity already knowing that AJ had an affection for herself.
If Rarity wanted confirmation, about AJ loving her, then why unnecessarily hurt AJ by turning her down?
If she wanted to agree on the proposal, then why bring Twilight and possibly break her heart and trust?
'Do you like mares?' or 'Could you love/date a mare?' would've been sufficient questions to gain confirmation, especially considering if they asked any further, and since Rarity already knew she was subtly targeted by the farm-mare, they would risk AJ confessing to Rarity directly, which happened in the end.
But it mainly happened because Rarity asked 'Who do you love' instead of just 'What do you love', a question that was in foresight, regarding her initial goal, which was helping Twilight plus not hurting Applejack, a stupid move.
The whole point of this slumber party, was to gain knowledge of Applejack's preferences in gender, yet Rarity pressed on asking who she really likes, despite knowing it was her.
Lots of hurt could have been prevented if Rarity had done what you would expect of a 'well-versed in romance' person, especially if said person praises herself as such.
Yet she messed up big time, despite the fact that she had enough time during the planning of their slumber party, to work out the correct questions in foresight.
Therefore, again, 'well-versed in romance' up my chocolate starfish.
4607158
Saying upfront 'Do you like mares?' is rather direct and crass, and on matters such as these, Rarity is nothing if not discreet. Rarity wanted Applejack to admit she liked mares, and got to that point perfectly fine. Things were going well in fact, but Twilight went off-script. Instead of saying 'that's not that weird, me too', and allowing Rarity to help guide Applejack into seeing the possibility there, she thought that AJ liked her instead, and pushed her to confess. Cue disaster.
(Also, I think even in canon, Rarity is... considerably less well-versed in romance than she believes herself to be)
4607158 at no point did I disagree with the "well versed in romance", if she was well versed she wouldn't even be in denial, yes she was being stupid, I simply disagreed on why she was being so stupid.
4607326
Ahem.
and
is exactly what I meant, rarity did confront her directly.
She may have tried to be more formally, but she got across what I was pointing out, namely to ask her 'Do you like mares, instead of stallions?'
And as I also pointed out, it was sufficient enough to bring results:
Until this point everything was according to plan and done more or less correctly... Ok I read over the rest again, Rarity didn't press any further but twilight did, with stupidly saying that she should just confess to her mare.
Why did she do it?
If Rarity really didn't inform Twilight before head, about the crush Applejack had on the alabaster mare, then it's still a big mistake on Rarity's side.
"Twilight, I fear Applejack may have a crush on me already, so we can't push her too far if we wan't confirmation from her that she indeed likes mares more so than stallions. Else we may risk her confessing those feelings to me, and in that case I would have to deny her proposal, in order for you to have a chance with her. I can imagine this would hurt her a lot, just as much as it would hurt me, so let us not go that far."
Something as that.
But apparently Rarity, as the 'well-versed in romance mare' she claims to be, did not think to inform Twilight of this possibility that could harshly hurt Applejack, so my catchphrase stands.
'well-versed in romance' up my posterior.
4608301
On a different matter, she was very generous to Twilight, on a sacrificial level even, since she gave her a chance with Applejack, although she clearly was in denial of her own feelings for Jackie until the end.
Then again...
Should Twilight fail to court Applejack, or fail to invoke deeper feelings in her, or break up with her in general, then Rarity can still have a chance with her.
So no harm done... weell except for the stupid denial thing and a sad Applejack.
4608301
Simply put, when a friend comes to you and says they have a crush on X, the last thing they want to hear is 'Oh, but X has a crush on me'. And while I see Rarity as being fine with her somewhat circumspect plans, I doubt Twilight would be. If she knew that Applejack liked Rarity, she would probably just back off entirely - she's hesitant to act even without knowing that Applejack likes somepony else. So Rarity simply told Twilight to leave things to her, and she would delicately raise the question. (Probably along with lots of 'Oh, and be confident Twilight, you're a very lovely mare and I think you two would be an ideal match' and whatnot that gets Twilight's hopes up, to the point that Twilight then goes too far when Rarity doesn't want her to)
You have a valid perspective, and a lot of whether it fully makes sense or not is based on personal interpretations of the characters and how and why they would do the things they do in the story (and several things far offscreen). But this is one particular issue that I did put a lot of thought into in terms maintaining believable motivations and actions. Perhaps that's not coming across as clearly as I would have liked.
Well, that hurt. A lot. I feel so bad for Rarity. She admits to herself that she has been living a life of lies, a life meant to make her look the best. She can't be herself because no one would accept her as herself. At least not in the upper crust. And she once again pushes herself aside for the betterment of her friends.
But what you do in this situation? You don't win. You can't win. Rarity is between a rock and a hard place. If she pursued AJ, she destroys her friend. If she doesn't, then she forgoes her own happiness and causes great grief and sadness upon AJ. But at least two people get to be happy.
Her decision is the best one in the end, right?
Right . . . ?
holy crap that was pretty good
Well, that ship sunk…
I need ice cream….
4609202
Here's what I would have done:
Explain myself. Let my crush know I like them.
Let it be after that. If nothing else, two people are happy, and you can walk away knowing there is no shrouded information and that you did the noble thing. Maybe not the most pleasing, but the noble thing.
probably wrong but is rarity starting to have feelings for applejack
4619205
Gee maybe -__-
Ok I'm sorry couldn't resist saying that. Seriously though yeah I'm pretty sure. In diamonds it's pretty clearly outlined that rarity began to develop feelings for applejack while helping applejack to the point of even beginning to regret rejecting applejack to give Twilight a chance. Hopefully I made things a bit clearer.
I see the accursed completed tag. I demand more mwa ha ha
I never care too much for Rarity, but damn, that ending got me thinking.
wait this is completed? but there is too much left to answer!!!!
Well, I saw that coming. Rarity's feelings, that is. Hrmph.
This is definitely a rather realistic scenario you paint here—of how complicated life and romance can be. Or rather, that things can be complicated and not necessarily work out the way that's best for everyone. There may not even be a "best for everyone."
And I definitely enjoy the commentary on Rarity's character, or what it could entail. I could definitely see her being so uncompromisingly selfless.
Good story.
Great story! It's not necessary but i kind of hope you write a sequel. Probably cause I am a sucker for the Feels
Hm... definitely worth all the good reveiws
One of the very few stories on FimFiction that goes beyond the words. I may be mistaken, but the theme of self-sacrifice is prevalent here. As with most of the stories I love, my only complaint is that it could have been better if it were longer and more in depth. I applaud you, Author, this story is going into my top 5%.
The element of generosity at her finest.
Gonna throw another one in the pile of "Sequel?"
Would really like to see how this plays out.
Ouch my feels bro
I really loved how each chapter was from the different perspective of each mare. It really sucked my right in to the story and gave an awesome sense of emotion to each ponies plight throughout this night. (lol accidental rhyme ). I was hoping for the ending to go the way it did but at first I wasn't sure what exactly was going to happen so nice job keeping me on edge
A fantastic job
P.S. I hate to be "that guy" but a sequel... wouldnt be... ummm a t-terrible idea
this... wow... I'm not ashamed to say I am getting a bit misty eyed over this. Not outright crying (quite frankly, this isn't really the kind of story to get one outright crying, and I don't believe it's meant to be, either), but misty.
This is very much not the standard tale of romance, but it is just as much not a common real world scenario. With that said, it never felt forced or wrong. Everything felt earnest and organic. All the pain and affection coming together in each of them, twisting and coming out through their own personalities. Just... sublime. It was brilliant to make each chapter from each of their perspectives, allowing not only the emotions and actions to show through, but their own thoughts and internal struggles in relation to them as well.
And don't get me started on the theming. Absolutely poetic on the front of the "Nothing I wouldn't do" repetition.
I'll stop myself before I start absolutely gushing, and just say that this may be one of my new favorite fics. Jolly good read, and absolutely fantastic to get a fic to make me "feel the feels" like this.
Read the story expecting RariJack, but ended up adding a new fic to my favourites. Was not at all disappointed.
But the question remains: Do I put this in my TwiJack folder or my RariJack folder...