Big Mac's Biceps, Now in Bulk

by gingersassy

Chapter 6: Hungry

Author's Note:

In the dreamscape, Luna speaks in Old Canterlot, outside the dreamscape, Luna speaks modern Pony.

Big Mac’s Biceps, Now in Bulk
Chapter 6

That tornado really was something, Big Mac thinks to himself, as he starts walking back home. He was glad Zecora agreed to keep those three fillies overnight. He was tired, and he just wanted to go to bed. Once he gets back home, he does just that, and lets sleep take him once again. Once again he found himself in a nightmare, and awoke in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, but he still didn’t mind getting to hear Pa’s voice again. He went back to sleep, this time, no dream in sight.

He was woken in the morning by what felt like a blast of magical energy wash over his hooves. All ponies could sense magic that was strong enough including earth ponies. Unicorns felt it in their horns, pegasi felt it in their wings, and earth ponies felt it in their hooves. While the blast felt strange as always, everypony in Ponyville had gotten used to the feeling once Twilight moved in. Nonetheless, he was awake now, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, which was just as well, seeing as it was only a half an hour before he had planned on getting up anyway.

Big Mac trotted downstairs surprisingly refreshed for having missed a half hour of sleep. Once in the kitchen he notices Granny Smith had already finished breakfast. He didn’t even know how hungry he was until he saw the food. “Now don’t you even start chowing down until your sister gets to the table, ya hear?” Granny says. “You can tell me exactly what you have planned today. A little birdie told me you have a date today. It was one of Fluttershy’s star chorus members to boot. So tell me a little about her.”

‘By Celestia’s soft slappable flank,’ Big Mac says inwardly, ‘I was not prepared to have this conversation today.’ He smiles nervously, trying to back away, when Granny pulled him back by the ear, using that powerful innate magic of hers (he wishes his innate magic was like hers, he was just unnaturally strong) that she uses to uproot weed trees with her hooves, like she could grasp it like Spike grasps things. “Alright, alright, I’ll tell you about my date!” She raises an eyebrow, urging him on. “I have a lunch date today, at the café, with a pegasus.” She still has a raised eyebrow. “But, my date… my date ain’t a mare, it’s a stallion.” He squeezes his eyes shut, expecting her to hit him just like Pa did when he came out, or at least start yelling. He feels a hoof on his side, and flinches, ready to take the hit, when he feels her other forehoof on his other side, like she was hugging him. He cautiously opens his eyes to see that she was, in fact, hugging him. “You don’t hate me, or think I’m disgusting?” He ponders aloud.

“Of course I don’t! Why would I?” Granny asks with a look of mild confusion on her face.

“Well, Ma and Pa did. Pa and I had a fight almost right before he… and Ma wouldn’t even let me in her hospital room for fear of bringing in any more ‘sickness’.” Big Mac confesses.

“That’s why you never visited her? And is that why you two were fighting? I’m so sorry Big Mac, if I’d have known, if you’d have just told me, I’d have slapped my boy to high heavens, and had a serious ‘talk’ with his wife that would have included a searing fire-poker.” She sighs, “I bet they told you that I’d be just as disgusted, or more so, didn’t they?”

“Eeyup” he admits quietly.

“Well at least that’s all behind us now, right boy?”

“Nope”

“It isn’t? Why not?”

“Pa commissioned an apparently powerful unicorn mage to enchant an entire vein of fool’s gold under Ponyville to give me nightmares about hell, and how I’m supposedly going there. Twilight just found that out, and she told me she’d work on a way to fix it.”

Granny’s eyes soften at that, “I had no idea sweetie. Now you two go ahead with breakfast. I’m gonna go over to Twilight’s and ask her a couple questions about this vein. And make sure you are nice and presentable for that date, I don’t want you looking like a slob on your first date with Bulk Biceps.” She then turns and walks off. He’d not seen her this spry in years, especially to take a trip to town on her own, but he didn’t question it.

“Eeyup.” He agrees. Once she was out the door a ways it dawned on him that he’d never told her Bulk’s name, and that causes him to grin. She already knew, it seems.

“Uh, Big Mac?” Applejack asks

“Eeyup?”

“Is what you said about Pa, and that pyrite true?”

“Probably, and eeyup.”

“So there is a big vein of pyrite under the town that’s enchanted to give you nightmares about going to that Hell place Pa was talking about, shaming you for being a colt-cuddler, and you’re mighty sure that Pa had it commissioned, but there’s no way to know for sure?”

“Eeyup” he says sadly

“Well then I’m glad Applebloom never really knew either of them. Now what’s this about a date?” she asks with a half-cocked smile.

“Well I’ll tell you over breakfast.” This morning was going great, he hoped the rest of the day fared the same.

“You got it.”

---

“Bulkie, wake up sweetie, you want to have plenty of time to get ready for your big date today, don’t you?” Mommy called down the stairs.

“Yeah!” He calls back up. He decides to wait for his shower until closer to the time for the date, so he’ll be freshly clean, but early enough before it that he’ll be dry for the date. Walking upstairs, he smells something yummy. He could get used to breakfast if he could always wake up to a warm breakfast, instead of just cereal. After the tornado last night, he was hungry too. “Thanks Mommy.” He says between mouthfuls.

“Now I do not want you eating like that on this date today, okay? And I also don’t want you ordering a big meal. Order something small, and don’t eat it all in one go. You want it lasting the whole lunch. That way you won’t look like a pig. Okay?”

“Okay Mommy.” He says over the three pancakes he had already stuffed in his mouth.

---

Big Mac looks down at the measly salad he had ordered. He was glad he ordered second though, if he had gotten the meal he wanted, and Bulk would have still gotten a small salad, he would have felt like a pig. That unfortunately didn’t change the fact that he was hungry though. He had forgone his normal between meal snack, because he knew he was going to a restaurant, which was something he didn’t do very often. “So how’s Mommy doing?” He says, trying to break the ice, and then starts freaking out internally, what if Bulk was angry he only used her first name?

“Oh she’s great, she’s hanging out with her friends at the hospital today, and she told me she might be sleeping over for two nights. I’m kinda jealous actually, she gets to hang out with her friends more than I do.” He chuckles.

That revelation hits Big Mac like a brick. He really didn’t have any clue as to the nature of these ‘sleepovers’ did he? He had to quell the urge to tell him though, Mommy was right, it would be best she tell him herself. Would he even believe someone else telling him that? He finishes his salad quietly, listening to Bulk go on about Mommy. He was so hungry, that he started eyeing Bulk’s salad jealously.

FLASH

After a blinding light dissipates, he looks to see Princess Celestia standing there, with her mane looking almost like it was on fire. “Are you Big Macintosh?”

He gulps. “Eeyup… ma’am”

“I’m sorry that I had to interrupt your date, but I need to let you know something, and ask you to do something, okay?”

“Eeyup.”

“First of all, your sister and her two friends are just fine, and they received their cutie marks this morning, almost simultaneously, as well. However, due to the nature of their cutie marks, and their special talents, I have decided that it is not only safer for them, but also everyone around them if I take them for a while, and teach them to control their abilities. They could wreak more havoc than they ever have with these abilities if they don’t learn to control them, or possibly even kill somepony. I hope this is acceptable.”

Finally regaining his senses, “Eeyup, if you think they’re a danger, but if you so much as harm a hair on their heads…”

“It is bold of you to say such words to your Princess, but understandable. Now what I am actually commanding you to do is this: Go to the orphanage, and wait for Sweetie Belle’s parents there. Once together take all the children there to Sweet Apple Acres, feed them, bathe them and keep them from harm. I caged the caregivers there, but didn’t have time to lock the cages magically, only physically, so they may be able to escape. If they so much as take a single step onto Sweet Apple Acres, kill them. I have warned them that that would be their punishment if they were to do so, so do not feel bad.”

“Eeyup, I wouldn’t feel bad anyway, those sick excuses for ponies deserve it, but if I may ask, why is nopony looking at us funny, and what are their cutie marks?” Making note of the fact that it seems the only ponies who even knew the Princess was there were himself and Bulk.

“Nopony is looking at you because I cast a Keller ward. Keller wards make ponies both deaf and blind to what’s going on inside the ward. As for their cutie marks, do you know who Shining Armor is?”

“Eeyup”

“Okay, that’s perfect. Sweetie Belle’s cutie mark is identical to his, save there is an image of a spring on top of the shield. Scootaloo’s cutie mark is identical to my own, with a phoenix burning in magic fire on top. Applebloom’s cutie mark is identical to Twilight Sparkle’s with a zebra-striped mortar and pestle on top of it. It is rare that cutie marks are so complex, and even more rare that part of the complexity looks identical to another pony’s cutie mark, and to tell you the truth, that’s not the only thing that scares me, but right now I can’t afford to let anypony know. I have to go inform Sweetie Belle’s parents now, so if you’ll excuse me.”

“Eeyup,” In a blinding flash, the princess disappears. He calls over the waitress, and orders the meal he actually wanted. “What?” He asks as he sees Bulk looking at him funny.

“If you were hungry, why didn’t just get that?” Bulk asks.

“Cause you got something small and I didn’t wanna look like a pig.”

“I only got something small because Mommy didn’t want me to look like a pig myself.” At that they both chuckle. “You know, the orphanage isn’t exactly empty, would you like a fourth set of hooves?”

“Eeyup.” With that, the waitress brings out his meal, in a goodie bag, he pays, and they walk off briskly towards the orphanage.

---

Big Mac and Bulk Biceps arrive at the orphanage, seeing Hondo Flanks and Cookie Crumbles standing outside. Big Mac knew them, but, they couldn’t be Rarity’s parents, could they? “Um, hi Hondo and Cookie, you don’t happen to be Sweetie Belle’s parents, do you?”

“Yea, we are, you didn’t know that?” Hondo questions.

“Nope, y’all sound and act nothing like Rarity, and since Sweetie Belle is Rarity’s sister, I had no clue.”

“That’s understandable dear, but, before we gather the orphans, Celestia was in a hurry and told us that you could tell us what Sweetie Belle’s cutie mark looks like.”

“Do you know the captain of the guard Shining Armor?”

“That guy on all the recruitment posters?”

“Eeyup, Celestia told me it looks just like that but with a spring on top of it.”

“Yeah,” Bulk exclaimed, “but those kids in there need us, lets help them.”

After a brief dumbfounded look on the two unicorns' faces, they of course never heard Bulk Biceps say anything other than yeah ever, they nod, and they round the kids up and bring them to Sweet Apple Acres. Granny Smith was delighted to help whip something up for all the children.

By the time all the children were cleaned up and fed, Princess Luna had already risen her moon. They decide to set up makeshift beds in the barn for the children, and Hondo and Cookie offer to stay up to watch the children. Big Mac accepts this offer, and leaves them to it, walking out of the barn with Bulk. “It’s kinda late, and the walk back to your house is kinda far, would you like to stay here tonight?”

“Yeah! I’d like that. Don’t think that means anything is gonna happen between us tonight though.” Bulk jokes.

“Nope.”

They walk into the house, and Big Mac takes Bulk Biceps up to his room, both of them joining under the covers laying side by side, touching, but nonsexually. Big Mac doesn’t get to hear his father’s voice tonight.

---

Luna frowns in frustration. Next time she goes to the dreamscape, she needed to bring a recording crystal, Tia would love this. She knew she did.

“No need Lulu. I will most definitely remember this. It’s gonna last me for weeks. Tell me though sister, when you saw what this shared dream was about, why did you stay?”

“Why didst thou?” Celestia glares at her sister, clearly not in the mood, or well, not in the mood to deal with her snarky comments. “This is the stallion I told thee about whose dreams are plagued with nightmares that I cannot influence.”

“Interesting.”

“Why is that?”

“He is also the eldest sibling and legal guardian of Equestria’s newest—” At this point Celestia is cut off, being pulled out of the dreamscape. Curious and wary, Luna exits herself.

---

Big Mac and Bulk Biceps wake gently at the same time, cleaning themselves up, separately, before checking in on the foals. Big Mac notices how tired and disheveled Hondo and Cookie look. “Thanks for watching the foals, we got it from here, you two are tired, why don’t you two head over to our guest room, I’ll show you two where it is, if Bulk can keep an eye on the foals for just a minute?”

“Yeah!”

“Oh come on Big Mac. I’ve had enough after-poker drunken all-nighters I should remember the bed I’ve slept in dozens of times.” Hondo says, Cookie rolling her eyes.

“Except the only bed you’ve ever slept in in that house was mine.” Big Mac smiles wide, Hondo’s cheeks go red, and Cookie looks between them furiously. “I’m kidding.” Big Mac lies, and lets the pair walk off, Cookie thinking that he was kidding. His favorite night was the one where Donut Joe had stayed over too. Unfortunately, he didn’t have time to reminisce. It seems like one of the unicorn colts may be staying around here more often. He had been one of the older foals that was helping put away the hay they’d been laying on last night, and lo and behold, the flank that had been blank not ten seconds ago now adorned an image of baled hay. “What’s your name?”

“Bundle Grains, sir.” The boy says.

Big Mac nods and trots back to where he was standing. Before he gets back to where he was, he sees a royal guard pegasus, so he walks outside, unsurprised to see a Princess at his farm, given the circumstances. What did surprise him, however, was which Princess it was. “Hello Big Mac,” Luna calls, “are the foals okay?”

“Eeyup.”

“I brought a few volunteer guards to watch the children at the orphanage until we can get things straightened out. Celestia told me that the creatures previously running the orphanage said you’d wanted to adopt Scootaloo?”

“Eeyup, but now one other too.”

“As you wish, tell me their name and I will have this guardsman draw up the paperwork for you, you’ve done more than enough for these foals already. You can go ahead and let him stay here as well if you wish.”

“Bundle Grains”

Luna nods, as does the pegasus handling the paperwork. Turning away, he goes to Bundle and tells him the news. Teary-eyed, Bundle tackle-hugs Big Mac, and the rest filed alongside Luna and the day-guard accompanying her. “Do I have to call you Daddy now?” Bundle asks.

“Nope, you can just call me Big Mac, like everypony else.”

“Do I have to work on the farm?”

“Nope, but it’d be nice. Baling hay normally takes us a whole day, but you did it in ten minutes, not to mention that cutie mark that just showed up on your flank. Come to think of it, I think we need to find Pinky Pie so we can plan your cute-ceañera. Bulk, you think you could find her and send her back this way, and if you wanted, come back yourself.”

"Yeah!" Bulk Biceps exclaims, and at that, Big Mac smirks, turning to Bundle and bringing him inside.