Just One Chance
Just One Chance
Sweetie Belle laid across the floor of her occasional room in her sister’s home, playing oh so cheerfully with Opal and her mouse shaped toy. It was well past her bed-time but she wasn’t tired at all, with the day lacking any crusading adventures (which made the rest of the town thankful for some odd reason), having no chores or homework to do (the school was still under repair after their attempt at earning a Chemistry cutie mark after all) and Rarity off on another of her dates meant she didn’t had anything to do, except wait for her sister’s return with Opal.
A few minutes passed and soon Opal tired herself of playing and went to her bed, leaving Sweetie Belle alone but not for long, the sudden noise of the front door opening caught her attention. Getting up from the floor the little white unicorn trotted down the stairs to greet her sister.
“Welcome back Rarity, how did your date go?” Sweetie asked stopping at the last stair when she saw her sister’s exhausted expression “That bad?”
Rarity sighed and looked up to her sister while using her magic to close the door behind her “Not really, to be honest,” she smiled tiredly at Sweetie Belle before accepting a gentle nuzzle from her “just, how to put it?, uhhmmm, painfully boring, that’s all.”
“How so?” Sweetie Belle questioned as she followed her sister to the kitchen “Isn’t Trenderhoof recognized as one of the most interesting stallions in Equestria? You even had a shrine of him, remember?”
“Yes, I do remember Sweetie Belle. Thank you for reminding me of that embarrassing experience.”
“No problem!” The filly replied cheerfully.
Rarity groaned while preparing herself some tea “Looks can be deceiving, I should know better than anypony, but I was fooled once again by my heart,” Rarity sat on a chair as her sister did the same at the other side of the table, both of them waiting for the tea to be ready “I thought…. I felt that Trenderhoof was the one for me this time, but he proved to be…….not.”
“Is he still chasing after Applejack even after everything that happened back then?”
Rarity shook her head a couple of times “No, he isn’t, he just wanted to see if something between us could click together and, from his perspective, if a relationship between us could work, but I’m afraid I had to turn down his offer for another date.” Sweetie Belle only hummed in return.
“Everything started so well, he proved to be the gentlecolt the magazines brag about, at least, for a while.” Rarity sighed again placing her forehead against the table “Then he showed his true colors and how uncouth he can be, the moment we arrived to our restaurant he began to act cocky but not to the point of being intolerable, mind you, and showed he had few to no manners on the table.” she shuddered at the memory making Sweetie Belle giggle a bit “Can you believe he talks while chewing his food? Ewwwww!” She shuddered again in disgust.
“Still, that sounds a lot better than most of your dates, Sis.” Sweetie Belle said with a small smile on her face.
Rarity giggled and sat up straight again “I suppose you’re right, but still, that was most unfitting for one that claims to be the pinnacle of what a gentlecolt should be. Anyways, after that we had a nice little chat about upcoming projects and a little bit of our personal lives,” Rarity sighed at this “and it was then when everything turned utterly and completely boring and dull, all he did after that was talk about his awards, his accomplishments, his properties, his sweaters, and so forth and so forth.” Rarity’s expression visibly sadden “He never asked me about me or my own achievements, and when I did try to talk he showed no interest whatsoever, he even went as far as to interrupt me a couple of times.” Rarity let out a sad sigh, almost a whimper “He never even mentioned how I looked. I didn’t even wear a dress just because he likes casual looks.”
“Rarity…”
“But, to his credit, he wasn’t like those other stallions that only cared for the fame, or reputation, they would get for ‘hitting on’ with one of the Element Bearers, and a personal friend of princess Twilight Sparkle. He only turned out to be, ehem, a tiny bit self centered, that’s all.” Rarity used her magic to carry the hot tea once the pot whistled, serving on the two cups her sister had pulled forward with her own magic.
“Is it too much to ask to find my true prince charming? My knight in shining armor? My galant and refined stallion? That one special somepony that I can rely on no matter what, the one that is always there to offer his help, care and support, the one that will never betray me and put at risk his own safety to rescue me from dire situations.” Rarity said as she stared down her cup slowly being filled up by hot tea “The one I can return such same feelings, the one I can trust above all else and that, at the end of the day, will be there for me to love and him to love me back?”
Sweetie Belle said nothing, she only blew over her tea as her sister began to ramble on about her dreamy stallion, Sweetie Belle smiled behind her cup, knowing who could fit that spot perfectly, even if said who was not a pony himself. After all, it was no secret for anyone who had the blessing of sight, to see the tremendously obvious infatuation the town’s dragon had for the beautiful seamstress, all but Rarity herself it seemed, she was aware of his crush, that much was certainly true, but she ignored just how deep that ‘crush’ actually went. True, some could argue that he was too young or that it wouldn’t work between them for being of different species or some other rumors she really didn’t like or cared about, but even she knew that if a relationship ever flourished between the two of them it would be hard, but at the same time, they would be happy together, of that she was certain.
She was about to take a sip out of her tea, when the sound of somepony knocking at the door echoed inside the house/establishment, effectively pulling Rarity out of her trance and her with a raised eyebrow.
“Whoever could that be?, And at this hour no less.” Rarity said as she step down from her seat and walked towards the front door, another couple of knocks served to confirmed that somepony was behind the door.
“Coming~.” Rarity said as she opened the door “Pardon me, but don’t you think it’s a little late to…” she began but stopped when she saw the figure standing just in front of her “...Spike?”
She said making Sweetie Belle turned her head away from her tea, again, and saw that the purple and green dragon was in fact standing outside the door, though she couldn’t quite see his face from her angle, she could notice a strange seriousness about it.
“Spike, darling, it’s well past midnight. Whatever are you doing outside so late? ” Rarity asked worriedly “Did something happened?”
“C..can I come in?” Spike said in a tone that send Rarity off balance, she had never heard her dragon friend sound so serious before.
“Of course, make yourself at home.”
“Thanks.” Spike said passing through the door, letting an uncomfortable silence fall between them. Sweetie Belle, for her part, was sitting quietly on her seat, watching curiously at the scene before her while sipping some of her tea.
Rarity closed the door with her magic “Now, can you tell me what’s the matter Spikey-Wikey?” she asked to the slightly taller purple dragon. A change that it was most happily welcomed, it occurred a few weeks after the defeat of Tyrek, at first, everypony thought he was hoarding again. Oh, poor Spike, he was the most scared of them all!, but after a quick letter to princess Celestia, and her almost immediate answer, everything settled down, there was nothing to worry about.
Spike now stood at the very same eye level as a normal pony, he also was a bit stronger, his arms and legs were now longer and could run much faster, though his voice and appearance (the last she was secretly thankful for, her memories of the garnish brute he had become because of his greed were burned into her brain) remained the same for some reason.
“Spike?” Rarity repeated a few seconds later of Spike not answering her question, he just stood there, looking at the ground “Spike…..what’s the matter de--”
“I love you.”
Sweetie Belle spewed the tea she was drinking, coughed a few times and looked with supreme disbelief at the dragon, her jaw almost hitting the table and eyes as big as dining plates.
Rarity was just speechless, her brain seemed to be paralyzed by surprised, taken aback by his statement “P…..Pard-”
“I love you.” Spike repeated, this time raising his head to see her directly at the eye.
Rarity took a step back, his face showed a determination she had never seen before in her life, if anything, it scared her a bit to see him like that “Wh--” one of his fingers stopped her from speaking any further, she looked down at the finger pressed against her lips, then in front of her to meet his eyes, repeating the process for a few times, her surprise now mixed with confusion.
“Don’t say anything, just listen, alright?” Rarity nodded slowly, a few seconds later he removed his finger, he took a big deep breath and continued “I love you, and I know it’s no secret to….well, anypony really, that I do, and I know it’s silly that I’ve come this late and at this time to say it, but I finally worked up the courage to do it, and I just knew this would be my only chance to do it before cowering again.” Spike sighed turning to his left to see his reflection in one of the many mirrors of her working place.
“I know I’m different, a dragon. I know I’m not the most handsome guy out there, I’m neither the most mature, influential, powerful, rich or anything really, I know I’m far from perfect and even further of being what you wish on a….romantic partner, I know that it’s almost silly, no, it IS silly that I got a crush on you the very first moment I saw you and that it never faded away, even when, at times, I myself wondered when it would end.” He said it to his own reflection while the Rarity looked at him, angrily wondering if she should say something for putting himself down the way he was, not to mention how he described his crush for her, somehow she felt a bit of pain in her heart just by hearing him say that, or keep her promise to listen until he was done. She chose the later, but just barely.
“But it never went away and, eventually, it turned into love, or at least that’s how I feel. It hurts when I see you sad or when you cry, it hurts when you return home after another awful date, it pains me to….be away from you.” Spike sighed “I asked Cadence what love feels like, she told me that it feels different for everyone, some feel sad, some feel pain, some feel angry, some feel lonely, but at the end of the day only you can know if it is real or not.” he turned to face her again “And I know what I feel for you is real, Rarity.”
“Spike…”
“Let me finish.” He said raising one of his claws “But…...but I know you don’t feel the same, hay, you probably will never feel the same, believe me, I know, I understand now. I know I can never be the stallion you want, I know I can’t give you what you desire or what you deserve, I know a relationship between us would be,” he coughed once “problematic, to say the least. I mean, how could it even work, right? A dragon and a pony, together? That’s ridiculous, laughable even! It has never happened before, I even triple checked the Canterlot records last month.” Spike turned to the mirror again, ignoring the hurt expression Rarity was giving him “I know…..I know I don’t stand a chance to win your heart.” He said placing a claw over where his heart was.
“Spike….” She said, her voice cracked, barely louder than a whisper.
“That’s why, what I’m about to say is the most greedy and selfish thing I will ever say, or do, in my life.” He turned around again to face her “Grant me one chance, just one chance to make my dream a reality, one date, that’s all I ask, you and me, on a real date, just the two of us, together.” Rarity was about to say something but he raised a claw again, signaling her to say nothing yet “It sounds hypocritical, I know, after what I said, and I’m not going to say something like ‘Just give me a chance to show you I’m the perfect guy for you!’, because that would be a complete lie for the both of us, this is only to fulfill my own selfish desire. I only ask for you to comply and grant me this wish, to let me fulfill my deepest fantasy; to take you out on a date. Simple as that, no rules, no compromises, no nothing, just the date I always wished to give you.” Spike said while looking directly into her eyes, showing her just how much he could rival Applejack as the Element of Honesty right then and there.
“After that, we can forget it ever happened, we can go back to being just friends and I will forget my feelings for you, everything will be back to how it is, even if you say no right now, just forget this ever happened, just please,” He said pleadingly as he kneeled in front of her, taking her left forhoove in between his claws “Rarity Belle, will you grant me, Spike the Dragon, the immense honour of taking you out on a date tomorrow night?”
Rarity was beyond stunned, if not for the feeling of Spike’s scales against her hoof and the strange pain inside her, she would believe this was just a really bad dream, maybe even a nightmare, but this was really real. She looked down at the dragon and saw a storm of emotions in his eyes, and the way he was looking, sweet Celestia, it almost broke her heart to see just how ready he was to be let down, as if he knew it would be the obvious answer. Finally, after several seconds of torturing silence, she spoke.
“Yes….” She said barely smiling at the dragon that looked back at her, his face clearly showing he didn’t expected that answer “Yes, I would be delighted to go on a date with you, Spike the Dragon.”
The dragon let go of her hoof and slowly got back up, his expression slowly morphing from shocked to disbelief to happy, his entire face turning redder than Big Mac’s coat, even his entire body trembled with happiness.
“Oh…..Oh!......Uhmmm, well…...alright then…...I, I think I should go now, uhmmm yeah, so I…...I’ll pick you up at six O’clock tomorrow….I mean, today, because you know, it’s uhmmm past midnight and…. errmm, alright? You ahhh, you don’t need to wear anything fancy, not that you don’t look stunning or anything since you are beautiful already he he, so…..uhmmm, yeah, BYE!” Spike said as he retreated back to the door, opening it and walking past it slowly, shutting it a bit louder than intended at his departure.
Rarity stood there, seemingly rooted to her spot in silence, dealing with a storm inside her head. Her mind was such a strange mess of thoughts and questions, that she did the first thing her brain told her to do, walk to to her room and lock herself inside for a few hours.
Meanwhile Sweetie Belle glanced back and forth between where the most unbelievable thing ever took place and her tea cup, and after a minute of doing so she put the tea down and laughed nervously.
“Alright, nice one princess Luna, you can stop now, I know this has to be a dream….a really strange and bizarre dream ha ha ha………..princess Luna…...Hello? Luna?” She said looking around the room.
Only silence answered her.
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*Elsewhere*
Two eyes opened in the darkness of the night.
“My senses are…...tingling.” The figure said.
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Rarity woke up after an almost restless nights sleep. Her mane was a mess and what little make up she had on, now served only to leave stains on her coat. She got up until she was sitting on the edge of her bed, looking at her carpet without any interest whatsoever, her mind still trying to figure out just exactly had happened last night, but all she could come up it was with a single word, woah.
Woah indeed.
She had never, not even in her wildest dreams, even begin to take a guess at how would Spike dragon up and tell her about his crush. Well, he had already tried to do it during his birthday two years ago, but she knew it wouldn’t be the same. She had hoped it would be something simple and heartfelt, or maybe a simple blurt followed by the childlike reasons to the why’s and the how’s. For Celestia’s sake, she even had a little speech prepared to let him down gently and, hopefully, make him understand it was just not made to be. In her worst case scenario, however, she dreaded he would act like some sort of possessive and obsessed fool, react angrily and later on resent her, ultimately destroying their friendship, or worse yet, let whatever dragon instinct play out for such a response.
But what he did last night, instead, had thrown her out by the window at hurricane strong speeds, she had not foreseen that kind of answer, or such strong feelings or anything he had said and done, really.
Spike had, instead, acted like a true refined and collected gentlecolt, something that not even her best case scenario could match. That alone spoke volumes about just how serious he had been, but even that pales in comparison against the two things that truly left her so conflicted.
The first was his feelings for her.
Love, he had said he loved her, simple as that, he had never once said anything about how deeply he loved her, or what she made him feel, or that he would love her forever, or anything remotely similar to oh so many ‘confessions’ she had heard (both directed to her and others, thank you very much!) in the past. He had admitted his crush for her and that even he had expected it to end, not to evolve into something stronger.
Then he began to point out why their relationship, if ever happen to be one, couldn’t work, and his points had been painfully true. That was another great difference between him and so many others, where others would promise the moon, the sun and the stars, Spike had instead point out the problems. If she didn’t know any better, she would say he wasn’t giving himself a chance at all, but that was just silly……..wasn't it? After all, why would he hurt himself like that.
Rarity gave out a pained gasp.
His little speech about him hurting for her, for seeing her sad, lonely, miserable and unhappy. Of him hurting for being away from her and what he felt for her was real, had left her very confused. The fact that he had even asked for advice, from the princess of love no less!, only proved he didn’t just jump at his impulses, he had done his research and took his time to sort his feelings. And that lead to the second thing that left her conflicted, the most important of all.
Sincerity.
He had been sincere. Every single word that came out his mouth was packed to the brim with sincerity…….and it hurt her. Each word he spoke was like a dagger aimed to her heart, and every single one hit their mark perfectly, she had no idea he felt such strong feelings for her, it had made her curse herself to sleep last night for being so unattentive and blind. She didn’t dared to imagine just how many sleepless nights she had caused to the young dragon, or how damaging her occasional little flirts were on him. To his eyes, and maybe the eyes of others, it all seemed like she was playing with his heart. The idea alone sicken her.
But what is it was true? Had she played with his heart without her knowing? Had she taken advantage of his feelings for her own personal needs or wants? Had she…...had she deliberately used him, even without her noticing?
Her body seemed to know the answer, as her head moved to her left until her gaze was set upon the gorgeous and magnificent Fire Ruby, the same she had snatched away from the dragon two years prior.
Rarity shaked her head rapidly. Of course she hadn’t snatched the precious gem out of his claws!, Spike had given it to her free willingly………..after…..after literally pleading for it and THEN using his crush to secure it.
“Am I really that shallow?” Rarity asked to herself, her gaze set upon the Fire Ruby once again, it suddenly losing some of its charm in the process “I can’t believe I really did that, oh my poor Spikey-Wikey.”
And yet, in the end, it turned out to be the reason that stopped him from becoming a monster, still, the fact of what she did wasn’t an excuse for actually doing it. She had manipulated him into giving her the gem she craved to have, twisting the feeling she knew he felt for her, that was something no Lady should, ever, ever do to her friends.
Her inner turmoil was pushed to the side as the last part of his confession came back to her head. A date, Spike wanted to take her on a date. A date that showed how little he seemed to think of himself, a ‘Dream Date’ as he had put it, and all he asked for was for her to accept his offer, and she had obliged to his wishes, very fast, almost without thinking it.
Was it the right decision? Or was this bound to break his heart even further than it already seemed to be?
Rarity wondered and pondered in silence for long minutes until she heard the voice of her sister calling for her, looking up she saw the small clock on her wall, it was almost noon, she got up in a jump and nodded once to herself. Her Spikey-Wikey not only deserved this date, he had earned it after everything he had done for her, most of the time without incentive. She had a date in a few hours and she needed to be ready.
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Twilight couldn’t help but smile as she looked at her number one assistant clean and polish his scales and spines with great care and precision, the reason behind it not being a mystery for her, after all, she had been waiting for his return to comfort him, from what she was sure was going to be a very heartbreaking experience, instead, he had a smile so wide it would give Pinkie a run for her money. He then explained what had happened to her hastily, she couldn’t make out much as she limited herself to just nod and humm from time to time, but she catched the bottom line. Rarity had said yes to his request.
It had been hard to believe him at first, but the utter glee in his voice, combined with his current actions convinced her, she smiled, happy that Rarity had accepted to grant Spike’s most deep desire. In her mind, he deserved this gift after so many years of following her like a love sick puppy. And maybe it would finally let the poor dragon put his mind at ease.
She giggled as Spike began to pose in front of his mirror. She had, right after he was done telling his tale, offered her help but Spike had refused, stating he had it all ready. Sometimes she forgot just how cautious and prepared her number one assistant could really be, he left the castle expecting to receive a negative answer, but had everything ready if, in his own words, ‘the beauty says yes to the beast’. She tried, really, really tried to get him to tell her what he had planned but he refused saying anything further than ‘Canterlot’, stating he wasn’t to spoil it. In the end, she had agreed to stop her interrogation in exchange of being the first to know how things went. Spike agreed contently.
“Still,” she thought “a little aid won’t harm.” She thought while looking at her best friend trimming down his claws. Deciding he needed some private time to get ready for his date, and to enact her own actions, she got up and teleported away.
After all, Spike needed to be ready.
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“Even without a dress I look positively stunning, don’t you think so, Sweetie Belle?” Rarity asked to her sister as she posed in front of a mirror, fluttering her eyelashes every now and again.
“You always look stunning, Rarity.” Sweetie Belle said “But why would Spike take you on a date so early?” she suddenly giggled to herself “Wow, that still sounds so weird.”
“Whatever do you mean by that, Sweetie Belle?” Rarity asked without looking at her sister.
“Well, I mean, you and Spike on a date, as in a real date? I can hardly believe it, and I was there!”
“I guess you can say that……” Rarity whispered “But now that you mention it, I do wonder why would our date be so early.” she said as her horn ignited to life.
“Maybe he’s going to do something really romantic!” Sweetie Belle said with a wide grin.
“O-ho-o-ho-ho Sweetie Belle, we both know Spike may be a sweetheart and a spendid gentlecolt---errrr, gentledragon, but he isn’t exactly a romantic.” *click* “There, now I’m ready.” Rarity said turning around with an almost nostalgic smile across her face.
Since Spike had told her she didn’t need a dress to where they were going she was without one, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t going to look her best, her hooves were polished to the point she could see her own reflection on them, her mane and tail brushed to perfection and her coat almost shimmering after her long bubble bath. One could argue she looked the same as always, but that was untrue, she looked positively stunning, even without extra make up.
Still, that didn’t stop her from wearing her precious Fire Ruby as a necklace. If anything, it only served to make her look all the more beautiful.
“Spike is going to have a heart attack the moment he sees you, sis.”
“Hush you,” Rarity said before turning towards her door and walk past it “now, remember that your dinner is in the fridge, be sure to heat it up for exactly twenty minutes, don’t get ‘creative’ with it and just eat that, alright? If you get hungry again or bored before I come back I left some bits on the table, don’t stay up late and close the doors before you go to sleep If I’m not back by then, understood?”
“Yes ma’am, I understand ma’am!” Sweetie Belle said saluting.
Rarity groaned a little at her sister’s antics before a knock at the door caught their attention. Suddenly feeling rather nervous, for some reason she couldn’t quite understand. “M-my, he’s a bit early.”
“Yeah, Spike doesn’t like to be ‘fashionably late’ as you put it, Rarity.” another knock was heard, this one a bit more nervous and weaker than the last “Yup, that must be him alright.” Sweetie Belle thought as her sister moved forward to the door and used her magic to open it.
Once the door was completely open a rather sheepish looking Spike greet them, he gave them both a small toothy grin as one of his arms stretched forward, holding a bouquet of splendid flowers.
“W-wow, you look b-beautiful, Rarity.” Spike said through rosy cheeks.
“You look very h-handsome yourself, Spike.” Rarity said, and she meant it. Even though Spike wasn’t wearing anything either his almost shimmering scales and spines told just how much he had prepared for this, just as much as her if she had to guess.
“Uhmm.” Spike coughed lightly, before raising his stretched out arm in front of Rarity “These are for you, milady, I hope they are to your liking.”
“Ohhh,” Rarity exclaimed as she took them with her magic, bringing them close to her she gave them a soft sniff “they smell so divine,” and took a petal or two to her mouth, savoring them with gusto “and are delicious, too. Thank you Spike, they’re absolutely lovely.” she said putting them on the nearby table, a small taint of blush painting her cheeks.
“Sorry if I’m a little early, are you ready? Because I can wait if you aren’t, not that ponies would notice since you are so beautiful already, and--”
Rarity giggled placing a hoof over his lips “Of course I’m ready, Spike.”
Spike smiled contently before shaking his head bit, he then gave a deep slow bow “Milady, our carriage awaits.” he said pointing to his right with both arms.
Stepping out in a hurry, Sweetie Belle looked at her left, and to her surprise, a royal carriage was just a few meters away with two royal guard pegasus waiting for them. She moved a little to let her sister see the carriage herself.
“Spike, you didn’t had to.”
“I didn’t, this is Twilight’s doing, I told her it wasn’t necessary but when I was going to leave this little surprise was waiting for me outside, which comes in handy actually, since our destination lies in Canterlot, milady.” Spike said as elegantly as he could “I hope you don’t mind, we can always catch a last minute train if you wish so, milady.”
“Well, I would hate to waste such an opportunity to travel via carriage, not to mention Twilight’s little gift.” Rarity said smiling at the dragon.
“That settles it then, milady, if you will?” Spike said offering once again carriage.
Sweetie Belle sat on her haunches as she watched her sister climb the carriage followed closely by Spike, who then told the guards something, each of them nodded and then took off calmly, just as they were about to fly off to Canterlot she used one of her forehooves to wave at her sister with a smile on her face.
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The royal carriage landed softly near the castle grounds gaining the attention of a few passerbies, a couple of seconds later Spike descended, offering his help to Rarity, who in turn gladly accepted. Spike gave his thanks to the guards and then both took off once again.
The couple walked calmly out of the castle grounds, a small smile and blush ever present on Spike’s face. It had been a pretty fast and uneventful flight, it took them just half an hour to arrive.
“Spike, darling, can you please tell me where are we going?” Rarity asked without turning her attention to said drake.
“I had planned to go for a little walk through the northern park, it’s beautiful this time of the year, and then head to our restaurant, but we arrived a little early, actually.” Spike said thoughtfully, it had been an unexpected problem but nothing he couldn’t handle.
“Did you made reservations?” Rarity asked with a little surprise, it was no secret that one had to have a reservation to attend to almost every restaurant in Canterlot in advance, at least a few days in the lower class ones. Rarity frowned a little at this, maybe his confession wasn’t so ‘sincere’ as she first thought.
“Yeah, just this morning actually.” He said casually while Rarity gasped “What’s wrong?”
“B-but how?” And like that her doubts were crushed “Not even Trenderhoof could make a reservation so fast for that very same day! Not to mention you were in Ponyville all day, h-how did you do it?”
Spike smiled sheepishly, one of his claws scratching under his chin “W-well, I just asked for a favor in return, uhhmm, more like a couple of them actually. And I did it through letters, which reminds me, I owe Rainbow big time.” Spike looked to his companion, who was looking at him with clear surprise “B-but enough of that, we have bit of free time to spare, so what do you say if we go to the northern park and take it from there, I really want you to see something there.” Spike smiled.
Rarity said nothing and just nodded, a somewhat pleasant silence fell between the two as the sounds of ponies passing by, background music and the soft breeze touching made up a really nice picture. Still, that didn’t stop Rarity from wondering why would any head chef or manager of any restaurant owe a favor to the dragon.
Upon arriving to the northern park Rarity immediately understood what he meant by beautiful.
Lush green and orange tree tops, the perfectly kept grass and flower gardens, the elegant patterns in fences, benches, statues and even in the floor, all of them forming complex forms of star constellations, the sun, the moon, hearts and many other figures scattered all over the place. And the view it gave of the horizon, simply breathtaking!
She turned to face Spike, who in turn was looking at her contently “I guess you really like it.” he asked softly.
“Yes, I do. Thank you Spike, for showing me, this is simply beautiful.” She said turning to see the horizon, the descending sun and the spectacle of color it gave for all to see.
“Hey now, we still have some free time before we head to our restaurant, let’s take a walk and enjoy the view.” Spike said looking at Rarity with a warm, sincere smile.
Rarity hummed in approval as the two began to walk through the lit ways of the park. As they walked they began to share a small conversation about her upcoming projects and his usual work around the castle, all the while enjoying the scenery and the singing the birds made. She noticed something very simple almost at the end of their walk, it was surprisingly simple and almost natural talking to him about nothing and everything.
“But of course, we are friends after all, nothing extraordinary there.” She thought as she gave one last glance at the almost completely hidden sun and the now rising moon. Rarity sighed contently and turned her attention back to her front, she saw a unicorn couple that seemed familiar to her, very familiar indeed. Her suspicions were confirmed when the couple turned their heads to her direction and approached steadily towards them.
“Rarity! What a pleasant surprise.” A very classy voice of a stallion said.
She was about to respond when her dragon partner walked forward to meet the stallion, and suddenly hug him as best as he could.
“Fancy! It’s been so long.” Spike declared cheerfully as he let the white stallion go from his hug.
“Spike?” Fancy asked, adjusting his monocle he stared at the grinning dragon before him “Spike my boy, it is you!” the stallion smiled at the dragon before pulling him into a hug of his own “Honey, this is Spike, my dear friend whom I’ve told you so much about.”
“Charmed.” Fleur de Lis said with a small bow.
“Likewise.” Spike waved a little at her as best as he could.
“Boy, look at you, you’ve grown up so much since we last saw each other.” Fancy said freeing the dragon from his embrace while patting him over his left shoulder “But what in Celestia’s name are you doing here, Spike? Are you finally coming back to Canterlot?”
“I’m afraid not, Fancy. I’m sure you know Twilight got her own castle, so moving it might be a bit of a problem, he he.” Spike joked “As to what I’m doing here, I’m just taking the lovely miss Rarity on a date.” He said stepping to the side, allowing Fancy to see the unicorn he first greeted, said unicorn had her mouth agape trying her best to say something but nothing came out.
Fancy smiled knowingly to the dragon “I see, well my boy, we would hate to interrupt your date any further, have fun for us on your date, ta ta.”
“Cya Fancy!” The dragon called as the couple of unicorns walked away, once they were out of hearing range Spike sighed happily, he turned around only to find Rarity’s face almost pressed against him “Gahh!” he said in surprise.
“You know Fancy Pants!?” She asked genuinely surprised “Why? When? How!?”
“Shhh, keep it down Rarity,” He said looking kind of nervous as a few curious glances were thrown their way “I’ll tell you about it at the restaurant, ok?”
She let out a soft groan before responding “Fine.” Spike gave her toothy grin, which in turn, made her blush a little.
They continued to walk in silence as they made their way out of the park slowly.
----------------------------------------------------*************************************************
*Elsewhere*
A pair of piercing eyes watched the unicorn and the dragon at a safe distance, careful not to lose sight of them both, the couple continued to walk, unaware of this watchful being, they soon approached their destination making the figure turn on a serious expression. Up until now everything seemed fine, maybe intervention was unnecessary. Maybe.
---------------------------------------------------------*******************************************************
“Le Plume Brillante.” Rarity whispered as Spike talked with the griffon at the entrance of the restaurant “He got reservations for Le Plume Brillante.”
“Monsieur Spike, correct?” The griffon said elegantly “Your table is this voie.”
“Thank you.” Spike said with Rarity walking slowly behind him, taking her sweet time to admire the exquisite decorations, statues and paintings scattered strategically, and quite beautifully, around the restaurant, looking around she noticed that it was full and that most of the other clients were, in fact, wearing little to no clothing, even those that looked like couples.
It was one of the main reasons she loved this particular restaurant, it was well known that while other restaurants were very clear to be suited accordingly, Le Plume Brillante did not, quite the contrary, it’s only policy was to be civil during the stay. She loved to dress up, everypony knew that, but she hated to be forced to dress just for the sake of it. Not only that, but the food was magnificent, the service unparalleled, the decoration simply breathtaking and had one of the most stunning views of the landscape surrounding Canterlot in the entire city. She knew the establishment entirely, she had read all about it in the past years and it baffled her mind as to why it was only ranked at four stars, when it was clear it deserved all five of them, all least on her humble opinion.
Yet there were two things about this place she loved the most, one, it was one of the most popular places to have a ‘perfect evening’, so to speak, and two, it was the place she always dreamt to go on a date with her special somepony. It was a secret fantasy only shared with her diary, so then, how did Spike could have possibly know that. Her train of thoughts, however, was interrupted by the voice of said dragon calling to her.
“Pardon?” She said looking at the dragon pulling her seat back for her to take it “Oh Spike, how thoughtful! Such a gentlesta--dragon, gentledragon.” she praised as she took her seat.
Walking around the table Spike took his own seat, then, a pegasus waitress approached to them.
“Welcome to Le Plume Brillante, house of the best desserts in all of Equestria. My name is Drizzle Sky and I will be serving you this fine evening, is there anything monsieur needs before I bring the menu’s?”
“Not for me, thank you. Milady, do you require anything?”
“Why yes, I would love a cup of sparkling water, if you please?”
“Of course,” The waitress nodded at her request “I will be back in a minute.” then she left.
Silence fell between the two of them for almost half a minute, their waitress returned with the menu’s and Rarity’s drink and went on to attend another table, leaving them in silence once again. Rarity took a sip out of her water and gave out a soft delighted sigh before speaking.
“Spike, darling, care to explain me how did you manage to get reservations for Le Plume Brillante, when it is well known that you must make reservations by weeks ahead?” Rarity asked calmly “And also, please tell me how did you ever figure out that I thrived to come on a date to this very refined establishment?”
Spike dropped his menu looking a bit hurt “A-are you suggesting I planned this out weeks, maybe even months, before last night?”
“Of course not darling, it just looks very uhmmm, suspicious that you were able to get reservations out the same day for this particular restaurant, that’s all.”
The dragon frowned a little, thankfully ignored by the white unicorn “Tell me Rarity, do you remember the griffon chef during the M.M.M incident?” Spike said picking up his menu again, trying his best to avoid seeing Rarity in the eye.
“Now that you mention it, I think I’ve seen two or three articles about, what was his name again?, these past few months, but what does that griffon have to do with anything, darling?”
“His name is Gustav Le Grand, I met him a little after the contest, we talked and I befriended him. He’s a great chef, but he’s really obsessed about his desserts, pastries and such, especially the eclairs.” Spike put down the menu to look at Rarity again, who was taking another sip out of her drink “Oh, and he’s also the owner of Le Plume Brillante.” Spike said with small triumphant smile.
Rarity almost choked on her drink, she drank what she had in her mouth, coughed a few times and then speaked “W-what!?”
“Yeah, anyways, after that we kept in touch and I did a few favors for him, remember when I told you it costed me a few repaid favors?” Rarity nodded dumbly “That’s how I got the reservations. And about the restaurant itself, well, that was more like a gamble than anything, I wasn’t even sure you still wanted to come here, last year you mentioned you wanted to visit this place during one of our gem hunts, so I, *ehem* started to save up enough to take you on a date here, gotta say, wasn’t easy having all those odd jobs at the same time, but it paid off in the end!” Spike said happily.
Rarity closed her mouth and looked down at the table “I’m sorry Spike, I….I just feared that--” she stopped when she felt one of his claws over her right hoof.
“I’m not mad, Rarity, just a little upset you thought I would do something so...so low.” Spike placed squeezed her hoof a little making her look up to him, his eyes looking at her tenderly “I told you, I’m not trying to win you over, I just want to make you enjoy this date, the way you deserve to enjoy it, though, I think I’m doing quite the opposite, huh?”
“No, you aren’t! You’ve been a perfect gentledragon all evening, if anything, it should be me who must apologize for thinking so poorly of your actions, Spike, and for that, I’m sorry, but I promise you I will enjoy the rest of our night to it’s fullest.” She said smiling at the dragon, both of them shared a few moments in peace, simply gazing at each others eyes. Suddenly both of them took the menu up again to cover the blush that threaten to imprint themselves on their faces “Sooooo, I said that during one of our gem hunts, how….odd.”
“Not really, you tend to ramble on and on when searching for gems.”
“You don’t say.”
“I do say.”
“........”
“........”
“And what about Fancy Pants, how do you know him?”
“It’s a funny story really, you see when I was living here in Canterlot….”
Slowly, but surely, the couple began to dwell into a full blown, pleasant and enjoyable conversation.
-------------------------------------------------------*****************************************
“...But then *snort* it t-turns out Owlowiscious had it on him the whole time!” Spike said barely containing his laughter.
“Oh dear, I can only imagine the l-look on Twilight’s face!” Rarity answered not faring any better than Spike, albeit doing so in a ladylike fashion.
Spike leaned in and smirked “Don’t worry, I took a picture, it’s one of my personal favorites!”
“Oh, Spike!, You little rascal!”
Both of them began to laugh a little louder than intended, though their neighbors didn’t seem to mind. The remains of their dinner left on the plates ready to be taken away, all that was left to end their stay was the dessert and the check. As their laughter died out, Rarity did her best not to snicker as Spike wiped a tear or two from his eyes, until it finally ceased to exist and only their locking gazes remained, they stood there just staring at each others eyes for the uptenth time that evening. A massive blush appeared on both their faces as they turned their heads to opposite directions, trying their best to hide them.
“What’s wrong with you, Rarity, you’re acting like a lovesick filly!” she reprimed herself as she began to turn her head to the front again, yet when their gazes met again half the way the blush returned and her gaze was now cast down to the table. After the initial incident everything just kept getting better and better, and for the first time in a long while, she actually enjoyed their conversation during dinner, they joked, talked about their friend’s antics, told some fun little stories about their past, their works, etc. But best of all, at least on her opinion, is that Spike was actually attentive, and most importantly, cared about everything she said “Of course he does.” she thought with a small smile and a giggle.
“Monsieur?” The waitress said startling them “Chef Gustave sends this as a token of appreciation and hopes you enjoy them and much as he enjoyed making them.” she then placed two eclairs that looked almost like a heart.
Rarity looked down at her dessert, then at the waitress and then to the direction the kitchen was, she could barely see the grinning face of Gustave through one of the circle-like glasses added to the doors, looking at their direction before winking at her. Her attention turned again down to the eclair, unsure of what to do.
“Delicious!” Spike exclaimed making Rarity look at him, half of his eclair already gone, she brought up the sweet dessert to her mouth with her magic and took a small bite out of it.
“Mmmmmmm,” She moaned “It is delicious, though I can’t quite identify the flavor,” Rarity thought before taking another bite “but this is just too good to care.” she thought again while munching away her treat.
“Is there anything else you require monsieur?” The waitress asked politely.
“I would like the check please, if you don’t mind.” He said before eating the other half of his dinner in one bite, making Rarity giggle a little at his antics.
“Somethings just never change, I suppose.”
The waitress took their forgotten dishes before stating “I’ll be back with your check in a moment, monsieur.”
“I’ll be right back.” Spike said sitting up and walked towards the restrooms.
Rarity only had to wait for no more than twenty seconds before the waitress returned with a small black tray on her mouth, she placed it over the table before bowing “Madam, your check.” the waitress moved back as another table called for her services. Curious, she took the note laying over the tray with her magic and brought it up to her face, her eyes nearly shot out of their sockets when she saw the debt…….she knew Le Plume Brillante was expensive, but not THAT expensive.
She put the paper back on the tray, wondering how was Spike going to pay, sure, he mentioned he did odd jobs around town and that he saved enough for this. He may be the personal assistant of a princess but he didn’t like to ask for anything if he could work to earn it, something she was proud for him.
Spike got back from his break and took the paper with one of his claws, he didn’t said anything for a few seconds before looking at Rarity, his expression almost as serious as the night before “How good are you at washing dishes?”
Rarity opened her mouth in surprise, she looked back at him, she was trying to find something to say, almost to the point of starting to panic, until she noticed a small smile forming over his lips, she instantly frowned “Spike!” she called at him angrily “That wasn’t funny!”
“Says you! Oh Luna,” The dragon snickered “you should have seen the look on your face, ha ha ha!”
“You’re the worst!” she spat back angrily.
“Hey, blame Discord, his antics are rubbing on me a bit more than I thought.” Rarity only huffed.
Spike pulled out a small sack out of one of his *pockets*, opening it he began to place some small, yet beautiful looking gems over the paper and the tray “And one for the tip.” he said after placing another besides the tray “Ready to go?”
“I’m not sure I want to go with you after that awful joke.”
“It was all in good fun, Rarity.” He said with a smile as he walked towards her seat, gently holding it as she stepped down.
“Still, you shouldn’t make such jokes to a lady, it is very rude and speaks low of the gentlecolt who made it.” She said, refusing to look back at the dragon, who lost his smile.
“Alright, alright, I’m sorry, ok? I...I didn't meant to make you angry.” Spike said sulking a little before he saw the small smile on her lips “Oh, you got me!”
“Two can play the same game, darling. Just remember, I’m a better player.”
Both of them laughed as they walked past the entrance, all the while Gustave looked at the scene as he played with his mustache.
“Bien joué, mon ami.” He said before returning to his kitchen.
-------------------------------------------------********************************************************
*Elsewhere*
It seemed that everything turn out well in the end. The figure in the darkness nodded as it saw the couple leave the restaurant, two hours after their arrival. The figure smiled seeing the little gift it had left for them just outside said restaurant. Everything turned out to alright for Spike.
Intervention was unnecessary this time. The figure turned around from its hiding spot, ready to leave them be for the remainder of their date.
“……..Then again, there’s no harm on keeping an eye a little longer.” The figure thought turning around again and continue to watch the couple in secrecy.
----------------------------------------------------------------**************************************************
As the couple made their way out of the establishment their laughter also died down, Rarity stopped for a moment and tilted her head in thought “Spike, darling, how are we going to go back to Ponyville at this hour? The train station is surely close by now.”
Spike hit his forehead with one of his claws in realization “Arrggg, you’re right, I didn’t thought we would be in there so long, what to do, hmmmmm.” Spike hummed thoughtfully, trying to come up with a solution “I could always ask…...no, no, no, it’s late, she must be getting ready to sleep, besides, I don’t want to bother her with my problems, plus I don’t want to look like--”
“Excuse me, master Spike?” A pony clad in the royal guard armor called to him, making both dragon and unicorn look at him “We were ordered by the princess to provide transport for you and your lovely companion. If you would be so kind?” the guard said before turning around and walked towards the royal chariot at the other said of the street.
Rarity clapped her hooves together eagerly “How nice of Twilight to send us a chariot at this hour!, don’t you think so, Spikey?” she said happily.
“Yeah,” Spike answered, his gaze focused on the castle in the distance and a smile on his face “how nice.”
The couple followed the stallion silently, once they reached the chariot Spike offered Rarity his help to climb aboard it, she accepted his offer with a warm smile adorning her face. They sat peacefully as the guard that had greeted them took his position alongside his fellow pegasus partner, once he was ready they took off the ground softly and soon shoot out towards Ponyville.
Once on the air Spike turned to Rarity and asked her “Was it, you know, enjoyable? The date, I mean.”
Rarity could notice the insecurity in his voice and that put her to remember their time together that day. Spike had kept his word, he never did try to impress her in any form, like so many others had done in the past, he acted like he usually did with her around, he may had gone a little out of his way to get their reservations but she had done the same in the past, just for different reasons. He had been truthful, that was the bottom line and she was thankful for it.
Also, he never once tried to take advantage or force himself against her in any way, he had acted like a true gentlecolt. And aside for getting their reservations he didn’t use his contacts for anything else, not even with the princesses, Twilight’s favors were out of the question, since he said she had insisted for that and nothing more.
The entire date was something she had to take into account, all he had done he did it for her and aside from the revelation of having friends on the Canterlot Elite, friends such as Fancy Pants, Hoity Toity and even Sapphire Shores, nothing went out of the extraordinary, in fact, their entire date had been normal. It wasn’t romantic, at least not to her standards, it had been just a simple, nervous (for his part), funny, enjoyable, memorable and not at all magical date. And it had been wonderful for her. Yet there was something she needed to know first.
“Was it like you dreamt it would be?” She asked in return, looking directly at his eyes, she forced herself not to giggle, it was funny how, even after his little growth spurt, he was still a little smaller than her when sitting.
“No, it wasn’t,” Spike smiled broadly “it was even better, for me that is, I don’t know if it can qualify as ‘a date you deserve’, I mean, I couldn’t even share a dance with you, I’m still to small to, ermm, hold a mare properly and I’m not a great dancer either.” Spike shifted a little “But as long as you had a good time, then I can say it was a dream come true.”
“Spike,” she started while placing a hoof under his chin “believe me when I say that, without a doubt, this was the best date I’ve had in years. You….you will make a mare very happy one day.” she said smiling sweetly at the dragon while a slight pang of pain erupted from her heart.
“Thank you, Rarity, for saying yes.” Spike said, holding her hoof with both claws.
The couple blushed a little and looked up to the starry sky, Rarity leaned to Spike and placed her head against his, Spike was startled at first but soon scooted a little closer to accommodate Rarity better. They spent half their trip in silence, admiring the stars above them, the cool air of the night embracing them tenderly.
“Spike?”
“Humm?”
“H-have I ever…...taken advantage of you?”
“No!, Never! What makes you think that!?” Spike said surprised, moving away from his comfortable position to look at Rarity, who in turn was touching her necklace and her face showed a sad smile “Is it because of the Fire Ruby?” Rarity said nothing “You want the truth?” Rarity nodded.
“Sometimes, yes,” his answer made Rarity cringe a little “but only when you were under pressure, and trust me, those were few and between. Most of the time you always asked me if I wanted to help you, and of course I was going to say yes, not only because of my crush but because I like helping others.” his gaze shifted to the Fire Ruby “And as for the Fire Ruby, I gave it to you because you really wanted it, it’s something I don’t regret ‘plus I got a kiss out of it’.” He whispered at the end.
“What was that last part, dear?”
“That I’m glad I did!” Spike said hastily “It looks way better on you than in my stomach anyways, he he.”
“Do you really mean it?” Rarity said with a small pout.
“Of course I do.”
“Promise?”
“Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” Spike said mimicking the motions for the unbreakable promise.
“I’m glad.” Rarity smiled at him “Now, sit next to me again, I do wish to enjoy the sky a bit more.”
“Your wish is my command, milady.”
The couple soon resumed their sky watching, both of them more content than before.
------------------------------------------------------------****************************************************
The chariot landed softly just outside of Carousel Boutique, as with the carriage the dragon descended first to help the white unicorn with her own descent, she accepted his offer and was about to step down, when the chariot suddenly throw her into the air, she yelped in surprise as she felt herself soaring through the air for a second or two before something caught her.
Opening her eyes, having no idea when she closed them, she was greeted by a concerned Spike looking down at her as he held her close to his body. A fierce blush appeared on their cheeks but neither moved.
They stood frozen in time just staring at each other, completely ignorant of their surroundings and the chariot flying away from them. Slowly, Rarity moved her forehooves from her chest to around Spike’s neck, she smiled lovingly at him with a gaze to match as he did the same for her. After what felt like days he finally started to help her stand up on the ground.
Once she was in all four’s again they remained in silence as they walked to the entrance of her house, they stood in front of it for a full minute before Spike spoke.
“So…..I guess this is it then,” He sighed before smiling brightly at her “thank you, Rarity, for giving me this chance.”
“No, Spike, thank you for making me feel like a true lady in such a long time.” She smiled at him and he smiled in return.
“Well……..goodnight, I guess.”
“Yes, goodnight. And again, thank you for the wonderful date.”
Spike smiled at her one last time before turning around and walk away, one of her hooves stretching out to him. Seeing him go like that was something she didn’t like, something that simply felt….bad. And it hurt her for the same strange unknown reason since yesterday.
“Spike!” She called to him before she could stop herself causing the dragon to stop and look back at her confused, before her brain could register what was going on her body moved towards the dragon, Spike, for his part, turned around completely to face her, he was about to speak when one of her hooves rested on his shoulder “Where do you think you’re going, mister?”
“Uhhhm, to the castle?”
“And you plan to leave without ending this marvelous date properly?” She asked with a raised eyebrow.
“I--uhmm, Huh?”
“You silly dragon,” She said leaning in towards him slowly “a true gentlecolt deserves a proper reward,” she said tilting her head a little to the side, her eyes closing in the process “ and you almost forgot your reward.”
Spike blushed “But I'm a dra--”
And he was cut by Rarity’s lips pressed against his sweetly, his eyes snapped open in disbelief for a moment but soon closed to enjoy the warm feeling of her lips. The kiss lasted just a couple of seconds and soon Rarity broke it off.
“That was actually rather nice.” She thought, her eyes still close, before feeling Spike’s claws at either side of her face, then she felt a little tug and finally the feeling of his lips returned. For a second she panicked but the sensation of his lips parting slightly to move against hers made her comply instead.
This time she felt like their kiss would last forever, her lips mashing and moving against his own slowly and lovingly as his did the same, it was simple and not very masterful, but it felt wonderful and sincere, and that was all that mattered to her.
Having no idea how long their kiss actually lasted she parted, finally letting fresh air fill her lungs with a soft gasp, she opened her eyes only to find she was a top of Spike while he rested against the ground, his light gasps for air the only thing she could hear, aside from her drumming heart that is.
Rarity got up fast as lightning “Ohmylookatthehourchao--!” she blurted out before running towards her house, she opened the door, ran past it and then close it behind her, not before giving one last look at the now sitting blushing dragon.
Spike, for his part, sat there for almost a full minute before getting up, his heart felt like it was going to burst out of his chest and his face like it would split in two because of his smile, but he didn’t care, he was happy, truly happy. He felt like shouting, crying, screaming, laughing and dancing, all at the same time, he needed to tell somepony about it!. Of course, Twilight! he had promised her after all. He turned around and ran back to the castle to tell his best friend about his date.
As he ran, he ignored a shadowy figure coming out from behind one of the nearby houses and fly off to the distance.
“A little help always does the trick.” The figure said as the moon shone over the land and revealed a multi-colored curled tail flying towards Canterlot.
-----------------------------------------------------------***********************************************
Rarity woke up from her slumber, she gave out a small cute yawn before curling up against her favorite pillow, opening her eyes a bit her vision was invaded by green scales and her senses by the warmth of her lover. Spike was now bigger than her or the average pony, he was, in fact, a bit bigger than princess Luna, which turned into a perfect huggable pillow. She heard him snore softly causing her to giggle, the way he did always seemed funny to her for some reason, she wrapped her forehooves as far as she could while he embraced her tightly against him, he whispered her name in his sleep and in return she kissed his chest softly. Closing her eyes again she decided to enjoy a few more minutes of peace with her dragon.
“I’m so glad I gave a chance, to myself, to be happy.” She smiled as she snuggled even closer to her lover. “One chance was all I needed to find my special somepony, my knight in shining armor, in the body of a dragon.” her smile turned wider as she heard her name coming out of his lips again.
“Silly details.” She murmured kissing his chest again.
End.
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D'aw. I'm not big on Sparity, but this was adorable. I'm also adding it to the Trenderhoof group, because he does sort of make an appearance--sort of!
Very sweet. I do believe I'll consider adding this to my favorites list. I do gotta ask though, was that pony watching them Celestia. She doesn't seem like the type to spy on others.
So it was princess celestia? Good enough for me
Beautiful story, good story to read before I turn in for the night. I was actually surprised that she was the one watching the date from afar. Oh well to tired to think of anything else I think I saw some grammar errors but I don't remember where... not to sure now.
4558517
No, it was Cadance.
4558789 YOU NAILED IT!
It may have seen like it was Celestia at some points (since my cannon is that Celestia is Spike's mother, thus making Cadence his cousin) but who else could it be other than the princess of love herself.
Very good work. Got my fave.
Despite errors, I enjoyed your Sparity story.
Good job!
up-ship.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/George-Takei-oh-my.jpg
That is all.
Well that was a well written fanfic. I think this is probably in one of the best shipping stories I have ever read.
It was good
This is very cute, but it is littered with grammar errors. I'd recommend giving it another once over, or possibly enlisting the help of an editor. Aside from the grammar and spelling mistakes though, this is solidly written, and pretty darn adorable.
Very nice. Told how it would be.
Just one piece of advice: Try not to put the entire plot of the story in the description.
Anyway, it was nice. Nothing else to say really, just nice. Must confess this didn't really have any effect on me, in fact I'm already kind of forgetting what happened as I'm typing...
...
...
...
...
IGN - 10/10
4560886 XD
4560961 Well nice to see you have a sense of humour
Honestly, I did think this was forgettebale, but from what I recall, I did enjoy this.
This is really amazing. It really would be a great canon episode if it were made possible.
Ek, buddy, first things first... ya gotta fix the description. Just copy/paste this:
After a bad date with Trenderhoof, Rarity returns home to her sister. Before long they are joined by an unexpected visitor. Said visitor turns out to be none other than Spike, the dragon that has been infatuated with Rarity for years now. He has come to give her a little speech, and ask her for the only thing he wishes more than anything else—
—just one chance, one opportunity, to take her on a date.
Owwwwwwwwwww. Súper awesoneee
the-toast.net/okay/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/spacey-bitch-please.gif
Spike literally did not let her get a single word out while he was making his little proposal, and it was filled a slightly less overt 'oh, I know I'm not good enough for you so I bet you'll just reject me' kind of backhandedness. It wasn't a charming approach that won her over. It was emotional blackmail, pure 'Oh, how I will suffer if you do not consider my penis' schlock.
See, I'm thinking of a few refined and collected gentlemen. Even a few rough-around-the-edges ones. Daniel Craig in pretty much anything. Cary Grant. George Clooney. Michael Caine. Jeffery Donovan. Will Smith. Simon Baker. Tim Kang. Kal Penn. Hugh Laurie.
Try to imagine Spike's little spiel coming out of any of their mouths.
Would it sound right from any of them?
There's no charm. There's no niceness, no mutual understanding that Rarity doesn't have to say 'yes' or risk their friendship. It's not even clutzy-fumbling endearing like nineties Hugh Grant. No references to mutual interests, no chemistry (because it's a one-sided rant from Spike!), not even the idea that they will have a mutually fun time on this date, which is pretty much the basics of requesting any date.
Christ, what an asshole.
the-toast.net/okay/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/gag.gif
That's kinda gross. If you have an unrequited crush on someone, it's not that someone's fault. They are not obligated to perfectly monitor their every move around you so that nothing they do can be interpreted as flirting, yet without hurting your feelings.
I don't know what's more off-putting—writing Spike as a Nice Guy, or portraying that as a good thing.
Was that Rainbow Dash or Celestia?
4561626 commonsenseatheism.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/constructive_criticism.png
4561732 Cadence
4561113 Nah, this isn't even worth to be look at that way, it may be worth a read but nothing else, this is not, in any way, a professional work XD.
Don't let anyone tell you this isn't lovely. I loved that slowly over the entire date Rarity found herself falling for Spike. Well done.
4561892 Thank you
4561897 You're welcome!
OMG when i read the the ending i was like
As Rarity put it "A lady never kiss or tell".
Some might argue that Spike is too young?! Hold on, hold the hell on!
Twilight and her friends are probably in their twenties right? Spike was hatched when Twilight was 5 (Saying that because that's the age you go to kindergarten) So Spike is only 5 years younger than Twilight. Spike must be at least 18 years old by now! He's technically an adult by human and pony standards! And this is also implied by the fact that he's really mature for his size and age! He's a baby DRAGON, but if he were a pony, he'd be a grown colt. I know for a fact hat rarity is at least a year older than Twilight, so I'd say that Spike is about 6 years younger than Rarity, maybe 7. So really, the age difference shouldn't be a problem. I know many people who are 5-8 years apart and are in a relationship. I'm getting tired of people just treating Spike like a baby! He's a young adult. Thank you very much!
But aside from that, cool story! Better than I could ever do!
This was awesome.
4561626
The last part is what I had an issue with, Spike IS a nice guy, to say otherwise is to be ignorant of his character, in my honest opinion
And that being a nice guy is a bad thing? Nope, sorry I have had many a date because I am a nice guy
*stands and applauds* Well played author, well played.
4561863 Says you, I'm a writer and a huge Sparity fan and I can tell this is great work. Plus I'm also a fan of Pia-Sama's work as well.
4561152 One chance
one opportunity
to seize everything he ever wanted
one moment
will he capture it?
Or just let it slip...
I really liked this and I normally don't go in for sparity
*Reading about halfway through the story*
I'm not entirely liking Spike's usage of 'milady' so far. It's nice to use occasionally but I find it weird to be used in the same way Rarity uses 'darling'. It works for Rarity but I feel that Spike is a bit more casual and laidback, even to her. To me, it does seem like he's putting a bit of a front and maybe it was to play to her own idealised 'Prince dream'. Used a sort of mock archaic manner is fine though.
*Finished reading*
I liked it. A lot actually.
I'm not going to lie, while I found this fic cute, it was kind of painful to read. Are you a native english speaker?
Anyway, what exactly are you looking for in an editor? Just to fix grammar or did you want the whole nine yards? I need a small amount of downtime from editing my own fic and I wouldn't mind giving this a thrice over if you were interested.
Cheers, Null
4562912
There's a difference between being a guy who is nice, and being a Nice Guy ('Women ignore me because I'm a Nice Guy, they only want assholes!). Spike is the latter in this fic, and that is not a good thing.
4564154 nope, english is my second language, and I just want an editor who is willing to help me with the grammar errors, that's all. If you wish to help me, I would reallt appreciate it.
This story was very good aside from the couple grammar errors. However, I have seen stories with much worse grammar. (It once took me three hours to fix a 1200 word chapter) If you would like me to edit for you, and help you improve the story I would gladly do so. In the meantime, I'm adding this to my favorites!
Sparity is best Ship! Well done. Loved this
4564724 I think I'll pass, I don't think I'm the guy you're looking for.
Good luck with that though.
Incredibly sweet and honest.
I loved how Spike slowly wins over Rarity without even trying to impress her.
Very IC, great chemistry and wonderful ideas.
I'm french, and this doesn't really mean anything. I'm guessing you wanted him to say "well done, my friend", in that case it would be "bien joué, mon ami".
It's been a while since I've read a good Sparity fic, I've always had a sweet spot for it in my ship list.
Congratulations for this story my friend, you deserve it.
4566111 Thanks
4558812 Epic and wonderful love story dude.