• Member Since 26th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen April 5th

re- Yamsmos


T

Apple Bloom is left in a desolate bomb shelter, with nothing but her own imagination and thoughts as to the timing of her brother and sister's promised return.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 42 )

So they stayed outside to protect her....ah. Well, I suppose as long as there's supplies inside that bunker she'll be okay…right?

So, are they being attacked by zombies, Changelings, or Zombie Changelings? Cause I thought it was Changelings at the end, But when they mentioned ponies going through mud, I thought zombies.

4540973 Remember, Apple Bloom had her eyes closed, and she didn't see what was around them the entire time, but attributed the motion of their arrival to loose mud.

YES THATS PERFECT

4542020 Is it? :rainbowlaugh: Thank you.

4541157 So blood then? That still leaves a lot of possibilties to what did it.

4542237 Hell yes it does. :rainbowkiss:

4540973 Could be gargoyles? :rainbowderp: A good read, however, I'm of the opinion this story needs more plot. :pinkiehappy:

I'd want a sequel, or an explanation, but... That isn't the point of this fic, right? :applejackunsure:
Still, it'd be awesome to see what is truly going on.

4/5
:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

4542872 Not even close to the point. :rainbowlaugh: Glad you enjoyed it though.

I enjoyed this story a lot. I like it how we don't exactly find out what happened after all. It fits, since it's mostly told from Apple Bloom's perspective, and she was a bit clueless. I do have a few minor issues with the story, though (i.e. grammar, punctuation)... I don't like it how you exaggerated the accent in some places. For example:

"Tuh, tuh not too..."

For a moment I didn't even know what 'tuh' was supposed to mean. Then I realized it's actually 'to'. There was no need to write it that way! It's really annoying and confusing (and the last word should also be 'to' instead of 'too').

4554981 Hey, glad you enjoyed the story! Yeah... I was kind of waiting for someone to catch that. I wrote that with her Southern accent in mind, but now that I think about it, it doesn't really sound right. Oops. :twilightblush:

4555909
'Tis okay. Also, one other thing with the accent... The 'Ah' instead of 'I' is also kind of annoying. There are some really good authors on this site who write the more... exaggerated version, but I recommend not doing that, since sometimes it can get a bit messy (people forget to capitalize, etc.). Oh, well, it's preference.

One other thing that I forgot to mention in my previous comment, that bugs me to no end.

The stick in his hands

I think you know what I mean.

4556097 Oh balls. Thank you! I can't believe I didn't even catch that. :rainbowlaugh:

Sorry for just bursting in here but I was just wondering if you were going to make a sequel to this...just a question.

4557324 Oh, of course! I have a lot on my plate right now, what with all of my other fics... but, I'm not saying it isn't possible. :rainbowwild:

Cool! This "short" story had me wondering what might happen next. You did leave it on a cliff hanger if you know what I mean. :raritywink:

This is a nice vignette. We are only told the story from AB's perspective, giving it a feeling of dissonance.

Well done, have a thumbs up.

Oh, and a minor critique, you may want to dial the accent back a bit, it interferes with the storytelling in places, but not enough to take me out of the tale.

I read the fic, then started listening to the song. When the lyrics started, so did the tears. :fluttercry:

Good job.

Zompony Apocalypse?

4989421 Try, "bug invasion". :raritywink:

4989538 Ah. Darned Changlings. Poor Apple Bloom.

4989538 Another Changeling invasion eh? Only this time they seem a LOT less merciful than before and chances are Applejack and Big Mac wouldn't be walking away from that fight.

4989538 I'm confused could you like sorta private message me the answers? Is Big Mac dead already, is this like a zombie apocalypse or changeling invasion, what is the Tag Stick, like is it a knife or gun and lastly can you do one from Applejack's perspective so like you don't even have to to do the message and just basically answer it all in a short story. Thank you for the great story and I think my tear duct's have no more water in them now lol.

5135538 I'll be glad to PM you if you simply don't understand. :raritywink:

5135546 can u pm me too... I dont get it.

I don't get it.

I was a bit confused until towards the end. A very good story but could use a slightly better explanation of what might be going on. At first I thought it was timber wolves, then zombies, and finally figured it must be changelings. XD
I like the tag stick idea, Apple Bloom is so innocent she wouldn't know what to make out of it so that was a good idea. I also like the way you portray the characters, keeping their personalities how they should be despite the situations. A very good story all in all. :3

5276017 Thank you very much. I honestly didn't expect much out of this story, but I'm glad it got so popular and I'm glad I wrote it in the end. Thanks for the comment. :twilightsmile:

5276025
You're welcome. ^^

Wow. That was heavy. It was a good read though. Great work man.

6665204 Haha, this is always the story I forget I made. Glad you enjoyed it. :heart:

My god this was amazing

8811436
How do you people keep finding this?

I keep forgetting I WROTE it.

9016061
You're doing a little tour now, I see.

9016062
Actually, I'm respecting the dead.

9016064
You can't possibly read my self-esteem.

9016065
R E S P E C T

Login or register to comment