26 Moonie and the very tired human
You've finally reached your room and your bed is within sight. You kick your shoes off, sending them flying in different directions before falling onto the soft, inviting mattress. A relieved groan escapes your lips as you bury your face into the pillow. Before you sleep, you glance at the clock. 4:48am. Well, today is a day off so you'll probably spend it sleeping but you wouldn't be this tired if Pinkie didn't accept that last minute catering job at closing time. Combine helping a friend with a party and it's impossible for her to say no. You push any more thoughts out of your mind and fall into a much needed sleep.
-----
"Anon," Moonie coos as she pushes a hoof to your face.
She starts drawing circles with her hoof on your cheek as you do your best to ignore her but she's not the type to give up and go away. You open one eye slightly to see Moonie's face looking at yours intently. Then she sees your open eye.
"Wakey wakey," she cheers as her magic opens the curtains letting in a blinding light.
"This is cruel, even for you."
"See, if we had things my way, it'd always be night and you could sleep undisturbed whenever you pleased."
"Let me sleep now then."
"Nope. If you're not up to make me breakfast in five minutes then I'll start drawing on the walls."
She leaves the room shortly after, leaving you with a surprisingly difficult choice. More than anything, you don't want to leave the safety and warmth of your bed but Moonie will just stir chaos until you do. So with a worn out sigh, you climb out of bed and you swear you can hear bones creaking and cracking under your own weight. It feels like you weigh three times as much as usual as you slide your feet to the kitchen.
Moonie is already sitting in her spot, using her magic to make Sir Bearington dance as she hums a joyful tune. You don't really feel up to making anything like pancakes so you pour some Applejacks into a bowl and place it in front of Moonie along with the milk and a spoon.
"This is my meal? I want pancakes," she stammers.
"And I want sleep. Guess which side won," you reply flatly.
"You know Sir Bearington is on the table? Not going to say something about that?"
"Nah, he's cool," you say while you shuffle back to bed.
Once you're back under the covers, you curl up into a ball and wait for sleep to reclaim you. Unfortunately, Moonie is faster than sleep as she back in your room as soon as breakfast is over.
"Anon," she whines, "I'm bored and don't you dare make that stupid joke!"
"Go crusading or something."
"Don't wanna."
"Play with your toys."
"That's boring."
"Do something that isn't annoying me. I don't care what."
There's a long, tense pause of silence before you can feel Moonie jumping off the bed. While you're not stupid enough to think this is over, you're content with knowing you've got some peace and quiet for now. As suspected, it's short-lived. Barely five minutes later, Moonie is back in your room but she's quiet this time. There's no sounds of snickering, things breaking or her making threats or demands.
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing. Why? Can't I wait patiently for you to get up?"
"You can but you don't."
Curiosity gets the better of you, so you roll over to see the work of art Moonie is working on quietly. She looks over her withers to you and gives you a broad, mischievous grin.
"What do you think?" Moonie cackles.
The drawing is of Moonie sitting on a throne shouting, "the night will last forever," while various ponies lay defeated beneath her. You and Sir Bearington also lie amongst the defeated beneath Moonie's throne.
"You two honorably gave your lives to reinstate my rule," she fills in before you ask.
"It's very pretty," you reply before rolling back over.
"You're not even going to tell me off?"
"Don't forget to colour it in."
Moonie throws her markers across the room in a fit and stomps out of the room. You wait in silence. And wait. And wait but Moonie doesn't return. The house is silent even so hesitantly tuck yourself into bed more and try to sleep again.
You assume, somehow, Moonie is using her magic to wait for when you try to sleep because every time you doze off, she's scurries back into the room and jumps on the bed. She squeals louder the higher she gets which only makes her that much more frustrating. Slowly, you reach out to grab her but she leaps off the bed and away. No surprise she got away so quickly, she's full of energy while you're the opposite.
"God I hate you right now."
The pitter patter of hooves sprinting to your room echo throughout the halls and once again, Moonie is back to bouncing on your bed.
"What did you say to me peasant?"
She continues to squeal as you roll onto your stomach and do your best to feign being content. It takes a moment but Moonie gets the idea that she isn't bothering you and stops with a huff.
"Your queen demands that you get up this instant and entertain me. Dance if you have to," she shouts she tried to shake you.
Given your size in comparison to her's, the most she can do is jiggle your legs a bit but it was enough to make you realise that returning to dreamland will be impossible. Even if Moonie leaves you alone, you're up now. But you're not about let the little terror off the hook and being as sleep deprived as you are, you're in a cruel mood.
"What time is it?" You grumble.
"Nine o'clock."
You make a pained whimper and curl further into a ball before stretching out as far as you can. A few joints and limbs give a satisfying crack and pop.
"Give me thirty minutes and then we'll go to the park or something."
"I'll be watching the clock," she says after a pause.
As you lie back into bed, Moonie takes a spot up at the foot of your bed as she rests her head on your leg so she can watch the clock. Now, you wait. All the running up and down she's down has worn her down, enough for her to be able to take a short nap.
When you hear the faint sound of snoring, you delicately move out of the bed and go to the bathroom and turn on the cold water. You also grab a few ice cubes from the freezer, just for the added chill. Then you scoop the unsuspecting filly into your arms.
"Hmm, wha-" she mumbles.
She still seems to be sleeping but the fear still causes you to stop and hold your breathe. Your heartbeat rings through your ears. Even when Moonie appears to have drifted back to sleep, the drumming still continues and it's starting to give you a headache. With every step, you take a short, sharp breath until you reach the bath. Now you can feel the grin stretching your cheeks beyond their limits.
"Moonie," you sweetly whisper, "time to wake up."
"Huh? Must have dozed--"
Before she can finish her sentence, you dump her into the freezing cold water. She lets out some unintelligible shriek as the cold sinks in and immediately scurries to gain some kind of grip so she can escape. When she finally obtains freedom, she lies there on the floor and stares at the ceiling. Her chest rapidly rises and falls from her panting, from her face you can see she's still processing everything until she notices you towering above her.
"You," Moonie snarls as she gives you a glare.
"Now we're even." you gloat, "come on, let's go the park so I can take it easy and you can terrorise the other kids."
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Hi, Bored, I'm Anon!
lulz
How do you know the great 'whatmustido'?!
5170794
He is my senpai. I write these fics in hopes that he will one day notice me and we can spend the entire day beating each other off while we tell each other how great the other's story is.
5170837
5170845
NOTICE ME ALREADY!
5170853
I'm sorry, is someone talking? Sounds just like empty wind.
5170862
Wow, cold hearted as fuck. I can be your big boy down under if you let me!
I-I'll write a collab with you or let you proof my stories or play vidya with you~!
5170872
Oh yeah, you'll be going down under, if you know what I mean.
Also, you already do all of those. You invited me to the same fucking MvM team hundreds of fucking times, you double hollow. And I think we worked on Kung Pow and a few others together. Although you don't really make me proof much anymore.
5170880
Yeah, well I-I don't want to bother my senpai with my shitty fanfictions but I may end up asking you to proof a story soon-ish if I can ever get it done.
The invites were supposed to make you feel included and wanted.
5170902
>doesn't want to bother me with shitty fanfics
>says he'll ask me to proof one of his fanfics
Come on, now.
5170936
I have to be a nuisance every so often otherwise what's the point in being Australian?
5170950
Pocketing lighters and breaking windshields with your head, ya fookin' bogan
5170957
That's only a fraction of being Australian. The majority of it is all about being a shitlord.
5170972
Well, at least you got that down pat. I bet you're not even a cunt.
5171026
>you're not even a cunt.
I bring shame to my people.
Hehehehe....
Moonie did the ice bucket challenge!
5170935 is it evil if i am black though. and fyi, i have a lot of jokes that were way more horrible.
and just because
5171044
What is even going on? XD
5176543
Shitposting.
5177729 I'm reading this on my phone, amd I can't read the earlier comments because it gets stretched too thin.
This is me as a dad
hahaha
Nice job.
(Hands her a box of crayons) knock yourself out kid.