Chapter 34: Where Were You When Silver Lining Tore You a New One?
MLP: FiM
Piercing the Heavens
By: Calm Wind
Chapter 34:
“Move your sorry asses, dammit! MOVE!” Silver yelled as the cadets followed him back to the flight track he had them fly before breakfast. A few moans and groans came from among the recruits as they arrived. All of which were instantly regretted as Silver began fuming. “GOD DAMMIT, IF I HEAR ONE MORE RECRUIT FART OUT A WHIMPERING MOAN, I WILL PUT ON CLOWN MAKEUP, AND STARE AT YOU AS YOU SLEEP WHILE PLAYING A CIRCUS FANFARE IN G MAJOR THE WHOLE DAMN NIGHT!”
All the recruits stared.
“YOU THINK I’M KIDDING!? I WILL DO IT!” He yelled again. The recruits all stiffened up and no more sounds were heard. “Now stand at attention and listen up!”
‘Stand attention’ was all the recruits needed to hear. They all instantly stood still and faced forward. Silver Lining started walking back and forth in front of them before saying anything.
“This morning was just a little thing I like to call ‘surprise conditioning!’ Get used to it because you never know when I might spring it on you! A good Wonderbolt is skilled, and can fight… but if they can’t keep it up for very long, they are USELESS! If you can’t fly from here to Appleloosa and back in one go by the time I’m done with you, I don’t know how the hell you made it this far in the first place!”
Silver stopped and turned away from them all for a moment as if he was contemplating. He turned back and faced them with an expression that was less anger filled and more professional.
“Now then, before we formally begin your training as recruits… I want to let you all know what lies on the horizon. If you survive… if you make it through my training… you will either be selected to stay… or sent home to be called upon when we need you… but it doesn’t stop there!” he began pacing. “The Wonderbolts are always looking for ponies to fill staff positions! If you are good at helping ponies and don’t get selected… we might consider you for our medical staff! If you prove to be good at coordination, but aren’t selected… we’ll consider you for staff management! Just know that there is a future for all for all of you as a Wonderbolt! You’ve already earned that much!”
A collective wave of surprise washed over the recruits… they weren’t expecting any words of praise. It quickly ended though.
“ALRIGHT! NOW YOU KNOW! TIME TO HARDEN THE HELL UP!” Silver suddenly yelled at the top of his lungs. “WE’VE HAD OUR FEEL GOOD MOMENT! IT’S OVER NOW!” Silver barked as he stepped away from them all. “Get comfy, cause our first few days are going to be lots of the same stuff! If you want to be a Wonderbolt, you NEED to know how to fly in perfect formation! If you are selected to be one of the five to stay here… you will be expected to know standard five pony squad formations! Yes, I know, the elite squads use four. DON’T ASK! I DON’T MAKE THE RULES! I JUST MAKE YOU FOLLOW THEM!” Silver turned and walked toward the group. He got into the face of a recruit up front, and then moved along from recruit to recruit. They had no idea what he was doing, but they didn’t question it.
“You!” Silver yelled in Twister’s face. “Step up!” He yelled. Twister was up front before he even finished. “You!” he yelled at Squall. “Get the hell up!” he yelled again. Squall moved up.
Dash watched as Silver called forth both Thunderlane and Little Star as well. Silver went from recruit to recruit once again before sharply turning to Dash. He walked right up to her and stuck his nose into her face.
“What do you think, Skittles!? Think you can lead a formation!?” he snarled into her ear. Dash flinched, but held her ground. Her? Lead a squad? She was already afraid to answer him. Should she say yes? She felt like she’d be damned if she did and she’d be damned if she didn’t. So whatever, she went with it.
“Sir, I think I can, sir!” she replied confidently. Silver lifted an eyebrow.
“You think so, huh?!” He pressed his nose to her cheek. “You better bite like you bark! If I’m not tasting the rainbow after this, you’ve got wing-ups till tomorrow morning! Still think you can?” he pressed harder to her cheek.
Once again Dash felt inclined to say yes. Silver had quickly made it clear that shying away from something was worse than recklessly agreeing.
“Sir, yes sir!” She replied.
“Then get your ass up there!” he made a sharp head motion towards the other four he had called forward.
Dash gulped as she proceeded. She stood with Thunderlane, Twister, Squall, and Little Star. She stole a quick glance at Twister. It was just so weird to see him so locked up. He wasn’t trying anything and he looked afraid to move without being told to do so first. Silver’s nonchalant pacifying of Twister’s reality bending skills had really left their mark. Dash was sure once they were free of Silver, he would go right back to being crazy, but for the time being? Silver had effectively broken Twister.
“There are four basic formations for the recruit squads!” Silver yelled out, breaking Dash from her examination of Twister. “Arrow! X! Plus! And Delta!” He walked up beside Dash and grabbed her by the shoulder. “The recruit five pony formations are always formed around a ‘head’ or ‘lead’ pony. They are the anchor that keeps the formation together. You follow every move they make and you do not break formation unless ordered or forced to!” Silver turned Dash and pressed his nose against hers. “NO PRESSURE!” he yelled in her face before tossing her out into the open. “Stand there and don’t move!” he ordered.
Dash stiffened as soon as she found her hooves and awaited orders. Silver never gave the ‘at ease’ so she wasn’t going to tempt fate.
“Everypony else, five feet, hover and watch!” Silver ordered. The rest of the ponies aside from the five he had called forward quickly obeyed and hovered five feet above the ground, looking down towards Dash. One by one, Silver grabbed the other four ponies and fit them into position near Dash. Squall and Star were put on her right, angling backwards. Thunderlane and Twister were put on her left, angling backwards. They were in what looked like a miniature flying V. Silver had placed them all evenly spaced apart before flying up to face the recruits observing.
“This is the arrow formation!” Silver yelled out. "We will get to the purpose of each formation later! For now, take it in and remember it!” he flew back down and stood between Dash and Thunderlane. “Spread your wings!” He yelled to them. They all obeyed. Every single formation has ONE SIMPLE RULE!” he emphasized each word. “TWELVE INCHES! One foot! Thirty centimeters! Three decimeters! I don’t care what you call it! TWELVE INCHES between your wings and the wings of the pony beside you at ALL TIMES! This is crucial! When we get to formation functions this is essential! I will drill this into your heads!” he flew back up to the recruits viewing. “You fall out of formation… you will fly a mile. If you get a formation wrong… you will fly a mile… if you don’t keep your distance from your wingmates at EXACTLY twelve inches… I will break off and eat BOTH of your wings… and THEN you will fly a mile! Perfection! There is no room for ANYTHING less!”
He dropped back down and moved up to Dash. He grabbed Twister, and forced him up, angling him in front of Dash. He moved over to Squall and did the same, putting them in an X pattern.
“X formation!” Silver yelled out. He stepped back and faced the Dash and the four in the formation. “All of you move two hours counter clockwise!” he ordered. They all looked to him in confusion. He narrowed his eyes. “Really? Counter clockwise. Two hours… please tell me you get me…” he said quietly.
Dash picked up on what he wanted. Luckily, she was not supposed to move as she was in the lead position. She wanted to tell the others to all move in a circle around her into a plus shape… but she didn’t want to speak out of turn.
“Sweet Celestia!” Silver grabbed Twister and moved him in front of Dash. “This isn’t that damn difficult!” he moved to Squall and pushed him back to be even with Dash. “It’s not like I asked you to shave a bobcat’s ass in a bathroom stall!” he looked sharply looked towards Thunderlane and Little Star. He pointed towards the two he had already moved. Little Star quickly shifted behind Dash. Thunderlane flinched and looked at Little Star. He blinked and glanced at Silver, who was glaring daggers at him. Thunderlane gasped quietly and quickly tried to move back to make himself even with Dash, but in the process, stumbled slightly and lost his bearings on exactly how far he was from Dash. He steadied himself and stood up straight… clearly way closer to Dash than twelve inches. Silver lifted an eyebrow and moved over to check the distance. He growled at Thunderlane when he saw how close he was standing.
“Blunderlane… do I even have to say it?!” Silver snapped at him. Thunderlane quickly glanced down and shifted slightly to his right, but his wingspan was still way to close, only about six inches from Dash’s. “TWELVE INCHES!!!” Silver barked. Thunderlane shifted again, but remained too close. “Sweet Luna! I hate to break it to you Blunder, but if you think that’s twelve inches… SHE LIED TO YOU!” he stepped over and forced Thunderlane to step out until he was in the right spot.
Dash’s cheeks were puffed so far out she thought her face was going to explode. She and many of the other recruits as well. Don’t laugh, don’t laugh, don’t laugh.
“This is the PLUS formation! Last but not least…” he pointed at Squall and Thunderlane. “Shift back one pony length. That’s ONE pony length Blunder! ONE! NOT TWO! NOT HALF! ONE!” he yelled as Thunderlane made sure to copy Squall’s shift perfectly. Silver nodded contently. “This is the DELTA formation!” he looked up to make sure all were paying attention. “And there you have it! The four basic recruit formations!”
Dash nodded to herself as she mentally wrote them all down. Wasn’t too hard to remember. The hard part was going to be maintaining such formations in flight. Although if she landed a lead pony spot… she was in control. There were so many possibilities to think about.
“Now… SURPRISE CONDITIONING!” Silver yelled out. All the recruits froze. “WHILE IN FORMATIONS!” Silver added.
All it took was one. One recruit let out a groan of discontent. Silver’s face went completely red.
“YOU’VE GOTTA BE HORSE COCKING ME!” he sped up to the group of recruits. “Who’s the bitchylittlesonofashittwinklehoovedassclown who just signed up for a midnight visit?!” he moved back and forth among the recruits with the angriest expression imaginable on his face. “Nopony, huh? Princess DAMN Cadance must’ve come all the way from the Crystal Empire and stuck her love horn in my ear and through my brain! I KNOW I AIN’T DEAF! WHICH ONE OF YOU GROANED?!”
Nopony answered. Silver’s anger faded and he landed below them.
“Everypony down!” he ordered. The recruits all landed. “Wing-up position!” he yelled out. The recruits all hesitated, but slowly got down into starting wing-up position. Silver turned to Dash and the others in formation, who were still all up. “YOU TOO, DAMMIT!”
“Ah!” Dash yelped before getting down and ready as well.
“Wing-ups till the pussy hoof that’s guilty over here comes clean! ON MY COUNT!” he started pacing around. “DOWN!” they all went down. “UP!” they all pushed back up. “DOWN! UP! DOWN! UP!”
And so it continued for a long time… nopony ever confessed. Apparently being stalked by Silver as a clown at night was more terrifying than endless wing-ups.
Soarin pitched and turned sharply as he zipped in and out of padded poles that were set up in a wide zigzag pattern over forty yards. There were twenty yards between each turn, and one pole every five yards moving forward over forty yards, making the course a hundred and sixty yards total from start to finish.
About half way through, Fleetfoot pulled up alongside him, slapped his plot, and sped past.
“Hey!” Soarin yelled as she pulled away from him while blowing raspberries. They were flying the simple course together. Soarin’s incredible acceleration abilities had given him a nice early lead… but as usual, once Fleetfoot picked up enough speed, he stood no chance. He was curious though, how was she catching him this time? It was a zigzag course, which required sharp and precise turns. Speed control was necessary in order to decelerate before the turn and then accelerate again after. Technically speaking, he should be destroying her in this course.
Soarin watched carefully as she neared the next pole ahead of them. Fleetfoot flattened her wings into a glide, twisted her left wing, and grabbed the pole with it. She slung around and fired towards the next pole without losing speed like a slingshot. Soarin grunted in disapproval.
“That’s cheating!” he yelled at her as she zipped by and he slowed down for the turn.
“Kiss my ass, Princess! If you can catch it!” she taunted back as she repeated the maneuver on the next pole before Soarin even got halfway to it. He rolled his eyes and finished the course, zooming through the finish and coming to a halt directly in front of Fleetfoot, who was flying slowly in circles upside down while making back stroke motions. “What took you so long?” she smirked as Soarin shook his head.
“Honesty,” Soarin shrugged as he began descending and Fleetfoot followed.
“Like you never cut corners,” Fleetfoot giggled. Soarin furrowed his brow.
“I don—” he stopped as Fleetfoot shot him a comical glare with one eyebrow raised. “Okay, maybe I do from time to time.”
“See?” Fleetfoot smirked as she went into a controlled free fall. “Besides, Spitty isn’t here to scold us. So whatever, it’s not like I don’t try hard.”
“Fair enough,” Soarin nodded as he wondered. “Where is Spitfire anyway?” Soarin asked as he glanced about. Today was an ‘open training day’ for most of the elite squads. Soarin and Fleetfoot were only using a small area. Members from both squads two and three were present as well. Spitfire usually came along whenever they did informal training. It was sort of a way they ‘hung out’ because it was more casual. Spitfire had implemented the idea of ‘open training days’ when she first became a captain. The concept was very popular right out of the gate.
Basically, it was a day that a Wonderbolt was expected to get in a full day of training, but they could do it at their own pace and in whatever order they chose. There were still formal training days where the captains would guide their squads through organized workouts and meetings, but the ‘open training’ gave Wonderbolts a chance to work on anything they wished, whether it be a personal challenge, hitting the gym, or perfecting a flight tactic. Spitfire received lots of praise for the new addition. It allowed more individual freedom, while still maintaining discipline.
Soarin looked to Fleetfoot as his visual search for Spitfire failed. Fleetfoot scoffed and rolled her eyes.
“I think she’s got the idiot in her office right now. He’s getting the lead squad pep talk/rundown/moral code/whatever Spitfire needs to run by him,” she answered unenthusiastically. Soarin held in a chuckled as they landed.
“You really hate Air Mach’s guts, huh?” he purposely pointed out the obvious.
“Boy, you’re as sharp as your damn horn,” Fleetfoot snapped back at him. Soarin lost it and burst out laughing. Fleetfoot turned and glared at him. “What’s so funny?”
“You can dish it, but you can’t take it, eh?” Soarin chuckled as he tried to reign in the laughter.
“I don’t know how you can stand him! He’s such a dumbass!” Fleetfoot whined as they made their way over to a few Wonderbolts that had gathered near the locker room doors.
“Hey,” Soarin shrugged. “It’s not my fault he thinks you’re the sexiest mare alive.”
“At least he has that right…” Fleetfoot said with the hint of a smirk creeping onto her face. Soarin just shook his head and smiled as they approached the gathered Wonderbolts.
“Ha! Look what we have here!” Soarin reacted as they approached.
There was a large space between the mare’s and stallion’s locker room entrances. A big stretching mat was placed between them to offer easy access to the locker rooms once Wonderbolts were done stretching post workout. At times it also served as a comfortable place to sit and chill out after a workout… which was actually the purpose it seemed to serve about seventy percent of the time.
A few familiar top elite members were gathered up on the mat: Lightning Streak, Blaze, High Winds, and Wave Chill. But they had all been drawn there for the same reason that caught Soarin’s attention. Storm Front was sprawled out on the mat, drenched in his own sweat, panting and wheezing. Autumn Rain from squad seven was sitting with him while Macho and Dex had gone for another few runs in the courses. The Wonderbolts were already cracking jokes, but all just having fun with the situation.
“Welcome to the Wonderbolts, kid!” Lightning chuckled as he gave Storm a rough pat on the back. Storm sputtered and coughed.
“Ow…” he quietly replied as Autumn shot a glare at Lightning. Blaze and High Winds couldn’t stop laughing at the sight as Wave Chill just sighed and shook his head at his brutal wingmates. Soarin approached Autumn and crouched down in front of Storm.
“He’s out already, huh?” Soarin asked Autumn. Autumn rolled her eyes.
“I told Dex we should ease him in… but he was set on ‘actually being productive without Air Mach to mess things up…’” Autumn said sarcastically as Storm opened his eyes and glanced up at Soarin.
“C…Commander Soarin?” he wheezed. Soarin shook his head.
“Oh no, don’t turn into Wave,” Soarin made a hoof motion towards Wave Chill. Wave blinked.
“Wha— hey!” Wave caught on, but Soarin ignored him.
“Just call me Soarin. No formalities needed with me,” Soarin winked. “Can you sit up? It’ll be easier to breath,” Soarin suggested. Storm tried moving, but it was painful to watch and only made Blaze and High Winds guffaw harder to the point where they had fallen on top of one another. Soarin rolled his eyes and glanced at Autumn. “Here, help me get him up.”
Soarin came around to Storm’s other side as Autumn stood. Soarin and Autumn carefully hoisted Storm up and sat him down upright. Storm took a few deep breaths before finally finding his voice.
“Thanks…” he said, still panting and sweating a little as Blaze spoke up.
“You made the jump to the elite ranks kid, get used to this!” She commented as she rolled off of High Winds. “It ain’t a damn cake walk!”
“I know…” Storm managed a small smile as he replied. “I guess it could be worse…” he continued as he finally caught his breath. “I saw Captain Silver with the other recruits earlier… he seems… a little harsh,” Storm commented. Fleetfoot stepped up and poked him in the chest.
“Don’t let the old guy hear you say that! He still gets on our asses all the time. You never really graduate from being a recruit to him. He just can’t do anything bad to you once you do,” Fleetfoot explained.
“In fact…” High Winds chimed in while pausing to release a long yawn. “If you ask me, kid… you’re missing out. Ol’ Silver’s a hardass, but he’s an experience,” she waved her hoof about lazily as she spoke. Blaze perked up and smiled. Soarin noticed, and knew what was coming.
“Oh?” Blaze bounced her eyebrows. “Do I sense we’re about to tell some Silver stories?” she glanced about energetically. Soarin chuckled.
“You know I can never resist,” Soarin smiled and looked around at them. “I’m all for it, Storm’s gotta know what he’s missing!”
They all agreed eagerly, all with their own tales to recount. Except for Wave, who looked like he didn’t want to… would never turn down the chance to recall some crazy things his captain had done over the years. This was a common past time for the Wonderbolts: recounting the hilarity of their basic recruit training under Silver. Their sudden eagerness had caught Storm’s attention. He listened intently, expecting some good stories.
“Who wants to go first?” Soarin looked around. Fleetfoot quickly raised her hoof.
“Oh, I have so many!” she giggled as she tried to pick out her favorite. “So hard to choose… OH!” she snickered. “It was our first morning after being brought in. I woke up when I heard the back of the door to his side room slam against the wall. He ran up to the window as the sun began shining through and started yelling more swears than I knew existed. He turned to all of us and shouted, ‘WHO THE HELL AUTHORIZED THIS SHIT?! WHO TOLD CELESTIA SHE COULD RAISE THE DAMN SUN?! EVERYPONY UP! WING-UPS! GO!’” Fleetfoot did her best impression of Silver yelling. It was almost spot on, earning snickers from the rest. “Basically,” she continued. “We ended up doing wing-ups because Celestia put up the sun,” she shrugged as the rest burst into laughter.
“Oh man, the old guy’s gonna kill me one of these days…” Lightning took a deep breath. “I got one…” Lightning chimed in. “When Fire and I were recruits, our recruit class only had like… three mares in it. This was before they remodeled the barracks, so our bathrooms only had three shower stalls. He was sick of us taking forever, so one morning he said, and I quote, ‘You have approximately three minutes to shower. That’s more than enough time to wash all your greasy asses. Take longer and we have wing walks for an hour.’” All the Wonderbolts winced as Lightning mentioned ‘wing walks.’ Storm tipped his head in confusion. Lightning quickly explained. “‘Wing walks’ are the same as walking… only you use your wings instead of your front legs… it’s brutal dude. Anyway… none of us wanted any more wing walks after we were first forced to do them… so we all showered… in three minutes… with seventeen stallions… and three showers… Shit got weird.”
“PFFFFFTTTT!!!!!” Blaze nearly spat all over as she reacted with the rest all cracking up with her. “Naw, naw, I remember…” she took over. “This one night… I swear it was three in the morning. Silver blared something over the P.A. I have no idea what it was, it was incoherent. He burst out of his room, yelling, screaming, and literally flipping ponies’ mattresses over with them still on it. He took us to the flight track and made us fly three laps before forcing us all back to the barracks and making us stand attention. He walked in a circle around the room about twelve times until this one poor bastard across from me yawned. Silver zeroed in on him instantly and went crazy in this guy’s face, ‘WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU’VE GOT BALLS, YAWNING AT ME! YOU SMELL LIKE PUSSY!’ He stopped instantly and pulled away from the recruit… sniffed the air… and said, ‘no, wait… that’s just my upper lip. Ya’ll have a good night!’ and went back into his room. I swear he was drunk.” She finished just in time to be drowned out by laughter. Fleetfoot fell over onto her back and Lightning stuffed his face down into the stretching mat. Soarin regained himself and held a hoof up.
“Oh man, I remember him messing with my recruit class endlessly…” Soarin chuckled to himself as the laughter died down. “You remember Fleet… with us it was always trying to keep a straight face. If we laughed, it was wing-ups. If we laughed during wing-ups, it was more wing-ups.” Soarin paused, trying not to laugh AS he recalled it. “We always ended up doing wing-ups for hours because he’d keep making us laugh over and over again. His personal favorite was making us count ‘clowndicks’ as we did wing-ups. ‘One clowndick, two clowndick, etc.’ none of us ever made it past fourteen clowndick before losing it… resulting in more… and probably counting more clowndicks.”
“Oh man… Silver and his dick jokes…” High Winds took over. “I remember he was always getting on me for different reasons. If it wasn’t cause I…” she paused to yawn sleepily. “Yawn so much, it was because of some other bad habit I had. I was full of them. One bad habit I still have…” Winds lifted up one of her hooves, the edges of it look gnawed on. “I still bite the tips of my hooves unconsciously. I used to do it every second I wasn’t walking, eating, or flying. One day he got fed up with me doing it and explained… in detail… how the barracks get used by new recruits every year and how hundreds of stallions have probably pulled on themselves at some point and then touched something else in the barracks later. He made me sit there and do the math to figure out how many transitive dicks I had in my mouth whenever I put my hooves near it… apparently I had upwards of ten thousand dicks in my mouth.”
It wasn’t so much what Winds said, more how casually she said it that got the whole group rolling on the mat.
“Oh, oh! I didn’t have him, but Dex told me this one!” Autumn chimed in. “Apparently one time Dex was cleaning the barracks with another recruit. As they worked, the other guy started singing as he worked. Silver burst out of his office, took the guy, and shoved him into a locker. He made the guy sing from inside the locker, and every time he stopped, Silver inserted a bit through the locker grate and the recruit would start singing again,” Autumn barely finished before cracking up herself. Lightning just stared in awe at her as Fleetfoot was laughing so hard she punched Soarin in the side.
“The old jukebox!” Fleetfoot fell over.
“Dude…” Lightning shook his head. “That is INSPIRED. He’s so damn clever.”
“He gets pretty creative,” Soarin spoke up again. “Like… oh man, Fleet, you remember how much he hated Rapidfire?”
“Didn’t we all?” Fleetfoot scoffed in response.
“Do you remember…?” Soarin snorted halfway through and took a second to gather himself. “Do you remember when he made Rapidfire go out in the courtyard and salute squirrels for five hours straight?” Soarin grinded his teeth as he tried to contain himself.
“HAAAAAAAA!!!!” Fleetfoot was over on her back instantly. “I DO REMEMBER THAT!” She exclaimed as the others joined in.
“It didn’t matter if he loved you or hated you!” Lightning exclaimed as he tried to remain upright. “I mean hell, he loved my brother for obvious suck up reasons, but he still messed with him… just like, oh man my personal favorite…” he began. “The old dude really loves the P.A. system. This one night after he turned the lights out… he went into his room, fired up the P.A… and started playing zombie noises over it for about five minutes… followed by a chainsaw and bloody screaming. As soon as the P.A. was cut off, he burst out of his room and yelled at Fire to ‘stop wanking.’ We all lost our shit, the lights were on, and we were doing wing-ups, but it was totally worth it.”
Laughter erupted once again. Storm was laughing so hard he could barely breathe.
Blaze suddenly turned and saw Wave Chill sitting behind them. As soon as she looked, a smile disappeared from his face. She quickly pointed at him.
“Oooooooh no! I saw that smile, Wave! C’mon, you’re his favorite little soldier, I bet you’ve got some great stories!” she encouraged him as the rest all turned to him. He blinked and sat still for a moment before the smile began curling on his lips again. High Winds chuckled.
“You totally have a juicy one for us, don’t you?” she asked while swaying and catching herself on Blaze’s shoulder. Wave looked about, smiling goofily.
“I may have a few…” he said while chuckling. Fleetfoot sat right up and leaned towards him.
“Oh! I’ve never heard any from you! Tell us!” she demanded.
“Okay, fine…” Wave gave in as he let a smile cover his face. “My best memory of Silver was one day near the end of our month with him… we were all eating in the mess hall and a staff member runs up to our table urgently. He pointed at me and said ‘Wave! Go to Silver’s room in the barracks immediately! You have a medical report letter from your family!’” Wave turned to Storm. “Now, the only reason you ever get medical reports directly from your family is if somepony died… so I freaked out. I was up, out of the mess hall, and all the way to the barracks so fast. I burst into Silver’s room. He was facing away from me at his small desk. He slowly turned around and told me to come in. He wasn’t yelling or smiling. He was being nice to me, which wasn’t a good sign. He looked me in the eye and said calmly, ‘I’m sorry Wave… It’s never easy to get news like this…’ before giving me an envelope. I quickly opened it, and unfolded the letter… it read: ‘Do fifty wing-ups. With love, Silver Lining. PS. I hate you.’ I looked up at him and he said ‘NOW.’ I was so happy my family was okay. I didn’t give a damn…”
Wave had a hard time finishing the story because the rest were laughing as soon as he mentioned what the letter said.
“Damn… I guess I really am missing out…” Storm chuckled as they all calmed down. Fleetfoot shrugged.
“Well, kind of,” she said. “It depends really. It wasn’t fun when he messed with you, but as you can see, he makes for some hysterical memories,” she winked.
“Speak of the devil!” Blaze pointed out towards the main entrance of the course gym. They all looked to see Silver walk in alone. “Oh geez, I wonder where the recruits are?”
They all watched as Silver scowled and made his way over to the locker room entrances. First he stopped in front of the stallions’ locker room.
“I SAID BATHROOM BREAK! YOU CAN SWORD FIGHT LATER! GET THE HELL OUT HERE!” he yelled before moving past the group sitting on the mat towards the mares’ locker room. “MOVE IT! DON’T MAKE ME TURN THIS INTO A UNISEX LOCKER ROOM! I WILL COME IN THERE!” he yelled. He stepped out and began to walk out into the gym. He paused and looked at all of the Wonderbolts sitting on the mat. “The hell are you all staring at?” he said calmly as they all burst into fits of laughter, chuckles, and giggles.
“Well,” Soarin stood up. “If he’s bringing them in here I’m gonna clear out. Might take a shower before lunch…” he thought out loud. The rest agreed and started dispersing. Soarin walked past the entrance to the mares’ locker room towards an exit that put him closer to the stairs, but as he walked, Rainbow Dash came barreling out and ran smack into his side.
“Oof!” They both grunted and stumbled.
Dash shook her mane out as Soarin quickly looked to her and froze.
“Sorry, I…” Dash looked up. Their eyes locked together.
“Oh shit…” Fleetfoot held her breath from off to the side.
But nothing happened.
Once again… nothing happened. Both stood completely still and stared at each other. Soarin couldn’t take it. What was wrong with him? He didn’t know why he couldn’t speak to her, or why she never said anything either.
He just wanted to get away.
He quickly gritted his teeth and forced his eyes away from Dash before moving towards the exit at a quickened pace. Dash turned and opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came to her. Soarin was out the door… and she was stuck in her spot. That was, until another mare from the recruits ran into her by accident. Dash was snapped from the moment and quickly moved towards Silver with the rest of the recruits, but not without stealing one glance towards the exit.
From above at the finish of a course… Misty Fly had seen the whole thing. She blinked several times and hovered slightly closer in small, one foot increments as if doing so would correct it. She had no idea what had just happened between Soarin and Dash. She adored the relationship they shared. Why did they act so disconnected just now? Misty had good eyes, and she saw clearly that neither of them even spoke.
She turned just in time to see Fire Streak finish his run of their course and quickly zipped up to him.
“Hm?” Fire blinked in surprise as Misty began poking him rapidly on the shoulder. He turned and looked. He casually made the hoof and wing motions for ‘what is it?’
Misty proceeded to use the sign language to describe the scene she had just witnessed. Fire grimaced as she did. He hadn’t realized that Misty was unaware of the recent… exchange between them. Fire looked away for a moment, not quite sure what to do. He knew Misty was extremely fond of the two of them and always ‘spoke’ very highly and giddily of their relationship. Misty reached up, grabbed Fire by the face and forced him to look at her. She made no signs. She just glared at him sternly.
Fire sighed and reluctantly put up his hooves. He made the hoof signals to describe how Soarin and Dash… were not currently on very good terms. He kept his eyes averted as he made the signs, and slowly looked back when he finished. Misty’s eyes had widened and her mouth hung open in disbelief. Fire was afraid of this, but it was too late to do anything about it now.
Misty turned her head sharply to Dash, who was down with the recruits being yelled at by Silver. She turned quickly to look at the door Soarin had just left through.
She shook her head once. Then twice. She turned and looked at Fire, shaking her head many times before she turned towards the exit and sped towards it. Fire tried to reach out and stop her, but she was long gone.
Fire had no idea what she was planning… but he wished he hadn’t had to tell her.
--- To Be Continued ---
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Silver could give the Drill a Instructor from Full Metal Jacket a run for his money.
And no I never seen the movie.
I loved it!
Misty fly will protect her OTP!
Either that or she's goanna get dash!
Loved the chapter and I can't wait for the next!
4911935 blast you
4911941
He's a real hoot to write for
4911944
Misty will fix EVERYTHING! she's badass like that
Thanks for reading as always! 
Those stories
And also, I liked the reference in there.
4911980 oh well. I got first last chapter.
I just about died laughing when I read this!
Where do you come up with this stuff?
4912046
hehe i'm glad you liked it!
4912059
I can't claim full originality on this one, i heard about this one from someone. Apparently it's a very old drill instructor stunt... funny as hell though
I think that Dash is going to be rewarded for being so nice and thoughtful to Misty during Flying Sky High. See, if you do nice things, they have a way of coming back to you later...
4912088
I figured if there were to be a guardian angel in this long running series of mine... it would most definitely be Misty Fly
I have a soft spot for her... i feel like she's the most unique character personality i've ever come up with 
4912076 No kidding! It must be real old because Drill Instructors now can't even touch the recruits (but they sure as hell can scream at them.
) Oh and I really love Misty Fly, she's such a sweetheart.
4912145
That's actually some very reasonable advice
I'm loving the exchanges. Hes being personal to them without attachment. Clever.
Very clever. specially with making it as memorable as possible so that the lessons stick more. Genius!
4912145
You know, you have no idea how relevant that really is *near Ferguson MO.
4912178
My late grandpa owned a bar that he ran with his hilarious old army buddy. (the guy had a hook for a right hand, if someone caused trouble, he'd hold their face to the bar and dig the hook into the bar next to their face xD the 50's were a different time eh?) he told me about that one, in fact a lot of these i've come up with have been loosely inspired by some of his instructor stories. I had to use the Juke box one straight up though... it's just too good
4912182
Glad i made you laugh!
4912217
i dont think i've ever had more fun writing a character before in my life
Awesome chapter. That was priceless. Also.
Go Misty.
Fix those stupid love birds, before Applejack has to applebuck some sense into Soarin.
Oh great...
That came out completely wrong.
Misty Fly is best pony.
That is all.
4912418
LOL! sounds wrong, but gave me a good laugh
4912429
she's quite honestly, my pride and joy in terms of unique character personalities
4912578 Feel free to put that in somewhere. I knew that was funny the moment I typed it.
To Appaloosa and back....
-----------
Yep Dash is about become amazing. Hope she read the Art of War...
Is it being racist for me rooting Matteo to not make the elite squad of the wonderbolts?... It's the 5 slots yaknow?
--------------
Well Storm's going to have an intresting awakening... I wonder if he could become lawfull evil o.0
I wonder how fast fleet can go......
-----
Finite
Oh my gosh my parents are asleep so I had to stifle my laughter so I don't disturbed there slumber.
hilarious chapter remindedes me of listening to my gym teacher drilling us like a military sergeant! This chapter is gold, KEEP BEING AWESOME! As always.....
Bai! =P
Silver Lining Insult/Fleetfoot Insult/Cameo Drinking game:
Chapter 34 = 1 1/4 bottles = Buzzed(already had a beer before reading)
I'm going to sleep well tonight. Really funny chapter Bro, cheers!
Stand at attention
Missing quotation mark
Ah, it'll be fine now. Misty will get it all sorted.
Hilarious
no other way to describe what I just read
And go misty... If anyone can help those two lost souls it's you... Even though dash can't understand you properly and Soarin struggles to communicate back... Just go save the day
Well, it's 5 AM, good chapter. *shivers* I hate nightmares...
4913082 And/or stand to attention, if I'm not mistaken.
Point is: yeah I noticed that too, and it bugs me equally!
Oh wow
Silver stories are hilariuos. Bravo, you made me laugh even though I am sick and bored. And that is something. 
And I can't wait for next one :)
This is one of my favourite chapters
Oh yes hell we are about to tell some Silver stories
4912817
Glad i could give you a few laughs!
Thanks for reading! 
4912870
You can blame me if you ever wake up your parents
4912960
I gotta work you harder haha
Cheers!
I hope that next chapter dash going to tell soarin that she is sorry...
Ooh! And silver stories OMG XD
This is so funny XD
It's hurts XD
4913082
Ah, thanks *fixed*
And yes, Misty shall not be denied
4913258
Love needs no words
Misty is bound to find a way to drill it into their heads 
4913419
Hope you sleep better
4913447
All fixed. Yeah that's how it should look, sometimes things get by both Kes and I
4913693
Yay! i love knowing when i've helped shift a mood or helped make a smile
4913857
Misty, the silent cupid
And oh yes, Silver stories are fun
4913447 I have heard both. Stand toattention is the normal call at first. Stand at attention is when someone starts moving on parade, or the more common 'Stand at attention when (INSERT RANK HERE) is talking to you!'
4913902 I see, thank'ee kindly.
4913875 You mean you aren't perfect?!
4914018
OH NOES!
Thankfully far from it. That would be an incredible expectation to live up to
4913849 ok, but seriously Silver dressed as a clown watching you sleep XD....that terrifying bro o_O
4914262
I got the idea for that one from a quote i heard elsewhere... let me tell you, the original quote... is bout 50 times creepier
