Rainbow Dash is dead. And while the death of the hero of Ponyville was a chock to all, the one who took it worst was her marefriend Twilight. She will not accept the fact that Rainbow is dead, and devastated by sorrow and loneliness, she turns to her books. Unfortunately, she finds comfort in probably the worst book possible. The diary of the scientist with the worlds worst reputation.
Under revision, with the aid from the marvellous Mrs. K and the daring doer A L Kelthian!
Chapter one rewritten 19th of july.
Oh, and look at the awesome cover, made and used with permission from Fensy!
Chapters (8)
It's good, looks like it can continue for a while, only problem is the grammer. The story is interesting, it gives a good depiction on how twilight would react in a situation like this. But the only thing is the grammer, other than that the story is good.
Yeah, people keep telling me that... Would you mind help me?
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I'm scared
This looks to be a good fic, well paced and written and whatnot, but like the others say, the main problem here is the easily avoidable grammar errors.
4466472 all right then, I will try to find an editor.
Can't wait for the next part!
Really good, you fixed the grammer situation from the previous chapter quite well. I didn't"t think you were gonna go with the Frankenstein experiment, but it turned out good. Could have been a little longer with some more details during the spike "training" moment, also I know this is supposed to be like a dark story, but some of the dialouge made it seem like it was more comedic than dark, kind of reminds me of magic.mov by hotdiggitydemon. But overall it was good, can't wait till the next chapter.
4484492 Thanks! The credit goes to MS Word :)
Well, I am a sucker for surprices so I didn't want to give it away at once. And the creature "adam" is my favourite monster so...
About the part around spikes torture, it was my plan to extend it. I just forgot but now that you say it I actually will do it when I'm finished.
About the comedy, I actually can't help myself. If I see a joke I must put it in. And "Twilight sparkle mad scientist"... you can't really play that one straight. But don't worry, the dark etiquette is there for a reason. The next chapter will be up when chapter four is finished. Around this weekend, I reckon. And thanks for the fav.
Like the story so far but OMG your grammar!
4505009 Well, it's good you like it, but considering the fact that I asked a friend to help me with that, and the fact that I thought she did a decent job, you might wanna share some of my faults?
4505855 Don't worry about i'm just being overly picky. also why would you kill Pound he was so young?
4506230 Now, you did end you comment with OMG... that does imply something serious. but ok.
Why? Because we are The Frank. And you will know us by the trail of dead.
EEEEIVILL!!!!!>:D
also... Love the story too. Keep up the good work author.
4520541 Thank you! I will do my very best to make the next chapter perfect for my readers.
Innocent like a child...she needs to be raised with as much love as as possible.
4522143 You are so right. She needs love....
okay, thats creppy....
I never read anything that made me cry before...
5614758 That's sad to hear, but I hope you enjoyed the story. Thanks for the fav!
5615456 I did just the ending made me cry. Spoiler for last chapter ahead. The image of Dash and Twilight in the afterlife together teared me up and the skeleton holding Twilight's like a bride got me to cry that's a good thing.
Hmm....OK, I"m going to be honest with ya.
The story is not bad, but could be better and there's still some room for improvement and really the only thing you really need to work on is making a habit of using spelling and grammar check (and perhaps have someone proof read your stories for ya). Because throughout the story I've found way too many misspelled words and somewhat bad grammar, which kinda hurts the story itself because of these small distractions.
5724243 Well, a honest word deserves a honest answer.
I know this story has some serious issues. It needs some heavy rewriting because I am not happy with the story, the grammar and spelling is just another onion on the salmon. Not sure when if ever though, it's much more fun writing new stuff. But thanks for your time, and I totally agree with you.
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You're welcome. I hope my small constructive criticism helps ya in your future stories.
challenge accepted