Filly Twi Learns a Lesson About Caffeine
Shining Armor inhales some of his large freshly made coffee from a nearby Starbuck. “Mmmm, a coffee with cream, sugar, and two shots of extra caffeine and espresso! Just the way I like it!” he grins as he approaches the front door of his house.
As he approaches the front door it opens slowly as his parents step out with light coats on. "We were wondering how long you'd be gone.”
“What? I just walked down the street to get some coffee mom and dad.” Shining explains, rolling his eyes, having explained this to his parents multiple times before. “It’s not like I was going all the way to Seaddle to get myself a cup from there or something.”
"True, anyway we'll be out for the night so please stay home with Twilight and make sure she is safe," Velvet Sparkle, his mother, says to their eldest foal.
“I will mom. Don’t worry. She’ll be in good hooves with me.” he grins as Twilight, just a filly, hugs one of Shining’s legs.
"BBBFF!* I missed you!" Twilight calls out hugging his front right leg tightly.
“LSBFF!* I missed you too, even though I was gone for ten minutes or so.” Shining says, rolling his eyes with a chuckle.
"I wanna play a game!" Twilight says before trotting back into the house quickly.
“What game is it Twilight?” Shining asks as he sips his coffee, hearing their parents call to them. “See you two later tonight!” Night Light, their father, says, calling out to them.
"See you later," They both says with a smile before walking down the street leaving Twilight and Shining Armor alone.
“So what game would you like to play Twily?” Shining asks, sitting on a recliner, careful of his coffee.
"Play a game of tag with me!" Twilight says looking up at her BBBFF with a smile on her face before looking at his coffee.
“Right this second Twily?” Shining asks her, knowing he still had some studying for his finals for college.
"Yes, but why do you drink that stuff anyway?" Twilight asks before hearing a ring of their magic phone.
“It helps me finish my papers and whatnot” he explains to the filly as he gets up from the recliner and heads for the phone nearby and answers it. “Hello?”
"Shining, it's me Cadance.” Twilight’s foal sitter and Shining’s crush says on the phone.
“Oh, hey there Cadance!” Shining exclaims, hearing Twilight’s foal sitter’s voice. “How’s it going?”
"Good, I just finished my finals. I was wondering if you wanted to celebrate with me. Maybe dinner at my place in twenty minutes?”
Shining thought about it for a few seconds before looking back at Twilight. “Well, I’d love to, but my parents are out tonight and I’m watching Twily at the moment Cadance. Anyway we can work around that?”
"I have an idea," Cadance says happily, after thinking about it for a second, "what if I come over and we have dinner and have Twilight play in the family room?”
“Okay, sounds like a plan. What did you have in mind for dinner?”
"How about a large salad, tea and some wine?”
“That sounds great! So, see you in twenty minutes or so?”
"See you shortly," Cadance says before making a kissing noise on her end before hanging up.
Shining blushes softly after Cadance had hung up before he hung up the phone as Twilight looks at him with a grin.
"Who was it?" Twilight asks tapping her brother's leg gently with her own hoof wanting to know what just happened.
“It was Cadance. She’s coming over in a few minutes.” Shining explains as he sees her face begin to light up.
"Cadance is coming over!" Twilight says excitedly, bouncing up and down.
“She is, but we’re having a dinner because she is done with her finals at college.”
“Finally!" She asks as she looks up at her brother before hopping around him happily.
He grins and nods as he levitates his coffee towards him to take a sip of it.
"Maybe she and I can play together?" Twilight asks looking up at him before tapping his foreleg and jumps back a little. "Tag, you're it.”
“Oh you little filly you!” Shining says playfully, setting his coffee down and begins to chase Twilight as she giggles happily.
Twilight giggles as she runs around corners and under furniture before being scooped up by her brother and hugged tightly.
“Tag you’re it sis!” he says, blowing raspberries into her belly.
"Shiny!" Twilight laughs happily before hearing the doorbell ring loudly.
He continues to blow raspberries into her belly and hears Twilight giggle.
"Shiny! T-The door!" Twilight giggles loudly before trying to push his head away with her hooves.
“Oh! I see.” he says, putting the filly down back on the ground and goes to answer the door, seeing Cadance have a large basket with the salad, tea, and a bottle of wine in it.
"Hey Shining!" Cadance says hugging him close with her gentle forelegs before kissing his cheek.
“H-Hey there Cadance. How have you been lately?” he asks her as he allows her to step inside the house.
"Good, but finals were a pain in my-" She starts before Twilight trots up and hugs her happily.
“Cadance!” Twilight says happily, interrupting her.
"Hey! How's my favorite filly doing?" Cadance asks lifting her with her blue magic and hugs her happily.
“I’m doing good Cadance! I missed you a lot!” Twilight nuzzles her warmly. “Can we do our special dance?”
“Oh Celestia, this again?” Shining says, rolling his eyes with a grin on his face.
"Yes we can," She says gently setting Twilight down before lightly punching Shining's shoulder before getting into the start position.
“Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake!” They say simultaneously with grin as they roll on their back with giggles as they finish the song.
"I love that so much," Cadance says before nuzzling Twilight gently. “It’ll never get old!”
“Oh I do too, because it's so much fun with you!” Twilight giggles.
"Now I need you to be a good filly while Shining and I have dinner ok?" Cadance asks rolling to her hooves before smiling at Shining and Twilight.
“Okay, but did you bring anything for me?” Twilight asks, hearing her belly rumble.
"Of course I did," Cadance says before lifting a large apple and a few pieces of candy from her saddle bags.
“Yay! Candy!” Twilight jumps excitedly, seeing the apple and pieces of candy.
"While Shining and I have dinner I want you to play in the family room ok?" Cadance asks Twilight before letting her take the piece of candy in her magic aura.
“Okay, I can do that Cadance!” Twilight grins as Cadance trots over towards Shining Armor.
"Now that she's distracted, want to go and get dinner ready?" Cadance asks softly before kissing his cheek.
“Sure thing Cadance.” Shining grins as they go into the kitchen and she sets the basket on the table.
—
As Twilight eats her candy and apple she looks at the cup of coffee that Shining Armor had left in the family room. "I suppose a taste couldn't hurt," Twilight says as she smiles and climbs up the chair to the table beside the chair and lifts the cup and takes a large gulp of the coffee before groaning. "That tastes yucky!" She says shaking her head. She sticks her tongue out to brush it clean of the coffee flavor.
"Why do they drink this yucky stuff anyway?" She asks aloud before she starts trembling slightly before she jumps down and pulls a book off the self before pulling another one off the self faster then the one before.
“Hmm, now I wanna read books!” she says, quickly looking through the book, turning the pages every few seconds.
As she flips through the pages she reaches the back of the book in record time before throwing the book haphazardly onto the floor behind her and opens the next book and repeats the same action.
“Mmmm, that stuff is good!” Twilight says, reading halfway through the book, after drinking more of the coffee. “N-Need m-more of i-i-ittttt!”
As Twilight tosses the book away she runs around the family room nearly leaving a trail of smoke behind her before crashing into a table knocking over a small plate and it falls to the ground and shatters startling Shining and Cadance in the kitchen.
—
“What the heck was that?!” Shining Armor exclaims, having finished some of his tea.
"Let's go and check it out," Cadance says setting down her drink before getting up from her seat.
Both of them get up from their seats and quickly enter the family room to find Twilight vibrating into a purple blur and hear her voice mutter something softly. “Twilight? What happened? Are you okay?” Shining asks his younger sister.
"What happened?" Cadance asks looking at the filly before seeing the broken plate and tossed aside books.
“Twily? What happened?” Shining asks again to her.
"What do you mean 'what happened?' I was just reading then drank some of that yucky stuff over there before bouncing around them in a circle.” Twilight says as her body vibrates from the caffeine in her system
“‘Yucky stuff?’” Shining asks with a cocked eyebrow.
"That yucky stuff mommy, daddy, you and Cadance drink,” She says still bouncing around the two flicking her tail from side to side leisurely.
“Oh dear Celestia…!” Shining says shocked to discover some of his high powered coffee was gone. “Twilight, did you drink some of my coffee by chance?”
"Yepyepyep!" Twilight says before jumping onto his back and trots in place.
“Cadance? What are we going to do now?”
"Um... let's take her to the park. At least she could work off the caffeine high in a place where I know she has fun," Cadance says suggesting a place that she takes Twilight to often.
“It's starting to get late; it's nearly dark.” Shining says, observing how much daylight was left.
"Um... then maybe we need to play with her so that she'll burn off this energy faster," Cadance says hating that it was so dark out.
“Burn it off faster? I don’t think she’ll burn it off any faster here than if we went to the park. Maybe we take her to her room and lock the door, hopefully she burns out by when my parents get home?”
"Too dangerous, she's got too many sharp objects in her room," Cadance says before lifting the filly with her magic to hold her still.
“Where’s more coffee Cadance? I want more coffee to read more books!” Twilight says, vibrating from the caffeine in her system.
"No more coffee for you young filly," Cadance says before rolling her eyes.
“B-But I wan-t-t-t-t-t c-c-af-f-f-f-f-feinne-e-e-e-e…” Twilight says vibrating from the caffeine in her system.
"No... instead we're going to play a game," Cadance says moving Twilight so she was looking at the young filly.
“W-W-What kind of g-g-g-gam-m-me?” Twilight asks her foal sitter, vibrating from her unexpected jolt of energy.
"I was thinking a game like tag or hide and seek," Cadance asks with a smile.
“I-I like t-t-tag!” The young filly says happily with caffeinated eyes.
"Alright, tag you're it," Cadance says before tagging Twilight with a gentle hoof before setting her down and starts slowly running with Shining.
“You think this’ll work?” Shining asks Cadance quietly as he runs with her.
"I hope it does," Cadance says and runs down a different hall leaving Shining alone.
“I hope so too.” Shining says to himself as he playfully runs away from his filly sister.
—
(Two hours later…)
Shining pants as he slowly tries to catch Twilight, not believing she still has energy despite the long game of tag. 'C-Come b-back here T-Twi…'".
"Nononono!" She says still running circles around her brother and foalsitter.
“H-How long h-has it b-been Cadance…?” he asks Cadance, who was panting herself.
"I think two hours..." She says panting before casting a spell to lift Twilight into the air.
“Celestia, does she have unlimited energy now?” he asks, before plopping onto the kitchen floor near Cadance, exhausted.
"I... guess so," Cadance says before collapsing onto the floor with Twilight still in her magic.
“N-Now w-what Caddy?”
"I... I don't know, maybe hide and seek?”
“I-If tag didn’t d-do, I’m not sure h-hide and seek will e-either…”
"Well... you come u-up with something," Cadance says panting softly.
“I-I got n-nothing now… T-Too tired…” Shining pants, hearing Twilight repeat “books” and “coffee” repeatedly.
"Wow... I did-didn't know she was this hy-hyped up," Cadance says groaning loudly.
“Coffee! Books! Coffee! Books! Coffee! Coffee! Coffee!” Twilight says with a buzz in her voice.
"Twilight calm down!" Cadance groans loudly before using her magic to help speak up how fast the coffee would leave her system.
“W-Wait… I have an idea…” Shining says weakly with a grin.
"What is it?”
“H-How about she reads books to calm her down?”
"Do you think it-it'll work?" Cadance asks canceling her spell.
“I-I hope. It-It’s the only thing I-I have…” Shining says to Cadance before turning to Twilight, still buzzing from the caffeine. “T-Twily?”
"Whatwhatwhatwhat?" She asks barely able to contain the energy flowing through her.
“Y-You like b-books right?”
"I l-l-love them!" She says shaking despite Cadance's magic aura.
“You wanna read every book we have in the family room?” Shining says with a grin, hoping that will do the trick.
"Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" She says trying to run to the books in the family room.
“D-Do it Cadance…” Shining nods to her.
"Alright," Cadance says setting Twilight down before releasing her magic gently setting her down.
“Books! Books! Books! Books!” Twilight quickly goes over to where the books are in the room and quickly gets several books and begins to read one.
“I-I hope this w-works…” Shining says before resting his head on Cadance’s side and closing his eyes.
"I hope so too..." Cadance says before yawning softly.
—
(90 minutes later…)
Shining’s eyes slowly flutter, slowly opening, seeing Cadance’s pink body. “D-Did it work C-Cadance?” he asks her softly.
"Wait here," Cadance says as she walks to the family room to see Twilight rocking on the floor holding her belly groaning. "Are you ok Twilight?”
“Ohhhh…” she moans softly, holding her hooves to her belly.
"Twilight? Answer me," Cadance says softly before walking up to her.
“I-I don’t f-feel s-so good…”
"Shining? Come here please," Cadance says before picking Twilight up with her magic and sets her gently on her back.
Shining slowly trots into the room and sees Twilight on Cadance’s back. “Twily? You okay?” he asks her softly, patting her head.
"I think she has a tummy ache," Cadance says before turning her head and nuzzle Twilight softly.
“I think I know the thing to help you.” Shining says to his sister before going to the kitchen to get some ginger ale and a straw. He trots back into the family room and holds the straw for Twilight. “Drink up sis, it’ll make you feel better.”
"A-Are you su-sure BBBFF?" Twilight asks lifting her head to see the straw right before her mouth.
Shining nods with a grin. “I’m sure LSBFF. Drink up Twily.”
"Ok," She says and wraps her lips around the straw and sucks down a few mouthfuls of the soda.
Shining grins and pats Twilight’s head softly as she drinks the ginger ale.
"Why ginger ale Shining?" She asks softly.
“It helps calm the stomach. My mom told me. It definitely worked for me in the past.” Shining explains with a grin.
"Let's hope it'll work for her," Cadance says before kissing Twilight's forehead.
“I’m sure it will.” he grins before seeing her drink all the soda. “Good sis Twily. Feel a little better?”
"Y-Yes I think I-I do," Twilight says licking her lips softly.
“Now, how about you go to sleep Twily. You need rest after tonight.” Shining says, nuzzling her cheek.
"O-Ok... BBBFF," She says before yawning softly.
“Come on Cadance, let’s get her to bed.” He nods to her with a grin.
"Good idea," Cadance says walking beside Shining as they walk to her bedroom before looking out a window and sees the crescent moon high in the sky.
“Looks like Celestia has a crescent moon tonight.” Shining says, looking out the window.
"Yeah. She did a good job tonight," Cadance says yawning softly while looking at Celestia's crescent moon.
“So, after she’s tucked in, wanna continue our little dinner date?” Shining asks as Cadance begins to tuck the purple filly into her bed.
"Sounds like a good idea," Cadance says before kissing Twilight's forehead softly.
“Good night Twily. Have pleasant dreams.” Shining grins and kisses her forehead softly.
"Th-Thank you BBBFF, Cadance," She yawns before closing her eyes and snuggles into her bed with her stuffed toy, Smarty Pants, and falls asleep.
Shining and Cadance grin and softly walk out of her room and gently close the door. “She’s a good filly isn’t she?”
"She always has been," Shining says with a smile.
“So shall we continue…?” Cadance asks before hearing the front door open as they head downstairs again.
"Mom? Dad? What are two doing back already?" Shining asks, hugging them happily.
“Shining, it’s been about three hours or so.” Night Light says, hugging him with a grin, nodding to Cadance.
"Still, wasn't expecting you back until later," Shining says before Cadance walks up beside him.
“How was your evening with Twilight?” Velvet asks them.
"It's was fine, Cadance came over about twenty minutes after you left for dinner.”
“I see. Anything happen while we were gone?” Velvet asks, unaware of Twilight’s caffeine high.
"No, nothing just a quiet dinner with Cadance after I put Twilight to bed," He says before Cadance kisses his ear.
“I see. Well, we’re headed to bed now. Good night you two.” His father says, rubbing Shining’s mane with his hoof as his mom kisses his horn.
"Good night you two," Shining and Cadance says to them as they climb the stairs to their bedroom.
“So, shall we have that ‘dinner date’ now Cadance?” Shining says softly with a light blush.
"Sounds good," Cadance says before hearing her belly rumble loudly making her blush.
“I’d take that as a ‘yes’” He grins as he kisses her nose softly. “Shall we milady?”
"Yes we shall my Shining Knight," She says before kissing his nose back softly.
“You mean, knight in Shining Armor!” he grins, using a pun featuring himself as he walks with her back towards the kitchen.
"You know what I mean Shiny," Cadance says before kissing his lips softly as she takes her seat.
“I know, I couldn’t resist.” He grins as he sits at his chair and begins to eat his salad again. “Ah, now this is more like it, isn’t it Caddy?”
"I agree, just like our first date. Remember?" She asks with a smile.
“Oh yes, how well, I do, my beautiful princess.”
"Thank you Shining, maybe we can have a night like that sometime after you finish your finals," She says with a smile as she takes a bite of her salad and sips at the wine.
“Maybe. I only have two more though. But I do agree Mi Amore Cadenza.” he grins with a wink, sipping his tea.
“Oh Shining…” She says before booping his nose with her blue magic with a giggle as they continue their now uninterrupted dinner date.
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I wonder did Cadence and Luna introduce themselves?
Uhh... Luna was still banished when Twilight was a filly, also, since when does filly Twilight know what caffeine is, just say "coffee"...
Other than that, not bad.... And on that note... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! L.O. L. T. I. C. !!!!!!!
fimfiction-static.net/images/story_images/191343_r.png?1400685706
I feel you, bro. Now run.
Have you considered the fact that most fiction is written in past tense? It is difficult to read present tense.
Also, you have a continuity error, Luna is still stuck in the moon and unknown at this point in time. They can't reference her when they shouldn't know of her!
4425577 I'm not sure. For the sake of this story, let's say they did and the banishment did not happen. Did you enjoy the story though?
4425601 Oh okay, I might change that later. Also, in the case of mentioning Luna, let's say that the banishment did not happen for the sake of the story.
Thanks for the comment! Glad you liked it!
4425996 And make sure she doesn't catch up. lol.
4426582 Hmm, I didn't think of that. I'll make note of that and apply it to future stories. Thanks for the criticism though, I appreciate it.
Also, something I forgot to mention, for the sake of the story, let's say the banishment did not happen. Just because...
4425996 I love that cover art. Soooooooomeone is in trouble. Say, did oyu make that?
4427299 No, I don't make things, Which sucks. In fact, I got this avatar from a friend here on Fimfiction.
4427306 Ah, ok. Neat fact
"Magic telephone?" The Sparkle family must be really well-connected if they have technology that not even the princesses do. As long as you're giving magic a carte blanche to do anything, how about a decaffeination spell?
4428859 When I mean "magic telephone" I mean it's a regular phone that they pick up with their magic. It's a regular phone, but they pick it up with their magic.
Well, that would seem like the most logical way to cure Twilight from her caffeine high, but it wouldn't make that interesting of a story wouldn't it? At least, I don't think it would in my opinion.
I really wanted to like this story because the premise instantly became part of my head canon, but the present tense style killed it for me.
4428940 my point is that you can't give them a telephone because thy don't have telephones in Equeestria, so one of the challenges a writer faces is to get around that. For instance, if Shing knew his parents were having date night he might have invited Cadence over in advance. So, instead of calling her, he offhandedly mentions that she's coming over, and she does.
Well, it could have been worse. Imagine filly Pinkie Pie with coffe...
That cover art.
4430016 The horror
4430016 Oh, she'd be a million times worse than filly Twi on coffee!
4426653 why not just change it from Luna to Celestia since she is in control of the moon at this point it's one word
4431584 Hmmm, I might do that. I think it'd make a lot more sense that way. Thanks for the suggestion.
The hell is "expresso?" Is that what the Saddle Arabians call it?
Also, I assume you don't actually mean two shots of pure caffeine, since that would kill a polar bear.
4431856 I did a bit of Googling and espresso is coffee, but brewed in a different way. This article should help you out. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Espresso
English isn't your first language, is it?
4432155 Well, yes, it is. I'm a fluent speaker of English, rest assured.
HOW THE HELL DID ANYONE SURVIVE CAFINATED FILLY TWILIGHT! SHE WOULD EXPLODE WITH MAGICAL ENERGY, TURNING CANTERLOT INTO A BOOK FORT!
Said sixy eight. Went to hit like, gigity. Went to seventy. BAD LICK BRIAN
4432245
Dyslexic then?
4432480 Yeah... I know that feeling...
4432317 Well, would it be any worse than caffeinated and/or sugared up filly Pinkie Pie? She'd make Twilight look like a foal!
See What I Mean?
Awww cute hyperactive Twily.
That cover art needs to be properly attributed. It's by dm29 on DeviantArt:
http://dm29.deviantart.com/art/You-Don-t-Give-Coffee-to-a-Filly-348186012
th01.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2013/026/5/f/you_don_t_give_coffee_to_a_filly_by_dm29-d5rau1o.png
24.media.tumblr.com/d8efa8e598ddcfb250a814c2186c25d3/tumblr_mgjomqNZ891qzkiifo1_r1_500.gif
4434338 Oops, I meant to do that. Thanks for the reminder. I'll put that on real quick, just to be safe.
4434216 I know right? Hyperactive Twily is cutest Twily!
Warning, wall of text approaching.
That should be "espresso".
foalsitter.
You forgot a space there.
Why would he pause there?
Don't you mean "done"?
You forgot a period at the end of that sentence.
That should be "Why do they". When you refer to plurals, use "do", or "are".
I.E.
Cadance and Shining Armor are...
Do Cadance and Shining Armor...
Drop one of the "now"s.
In the kitchen.
Bouncing around what in a circle?
Is it night, or is it dusk? You should probably change it to: "It's starting to get late, it's almost dark."
Another redundant statement. Drop "in the day".
When using comparisons, use "than".
Maybe change this to "Too dangerous, she's got too many sharp objects in her room."
This will probably read easier if it was written like this:
"Shining pants as he slowly tries to catch Twilight, not believing she still has energy despite the long game of tag. 'C-Come b-back here T-Twi…'"
A little hair of the dog, huh? I would've went with a peppermint.
HA! The lingering caffeine won't let her do that.
Thanks, but I figured that out on my own.
Well, that was certainly interesting. The premise is funny, but the execution, like many have already stated, is something to be desired. It should be written in past tense. Despite this, I'll still give it a like and a fav.
4435464 Thank you for the criticism and the mistakes I didn't catch the times that I proof read the story. I did manage to make those changes to the story. Again thanks for the criticism and the pointing out the corrections I should/did make. I appreciate it!
That was funny I really liked it
4435950
No problem. Good luck on your future stories.
4436443 Thank you my friend.
so funny
and really cute too. 
4437778 Thanks for the comment and the watch! I really appreciate it!
4436428 Thanks! I appreciate it!
no problem it deserved it.
4437964 I"m glad you thought so.
4430016 Do I have to? That sounds like when they gave Hammy soda in the Over the Hedge movie. Oh no.
4440756
Or when Eddie Valiant gave whisky to Roger Rabbit.
An interesting fiction of sorts, but hard to read. Your dialogue felt really sluggish and you seemed to like using the same phrase (or similar phrases) over and over again.
Example: some variation of "vibrating from the caffeine in her system." was used repeatedly, and it really threw off your writing.
I wont really go into other gritty details, as I'm pretty sure other commenters before I have done so. By all means, not completely terrible, but not exactly good, either. Keep practicing and you'll get there, though! Have a Thumbs Up for effort. And a
Caffeinated Twilight is funny.
I'm doing a summery of this for reading class