Page generated in 0.06 seconds
Total duration
879 users online
1,150,175 hits today, 2,004,447 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I found the time to read this chapter. I can say that the story needs some editing or an editor. I noticed many mistakes with the grammar and spelling.
Other than that, you're doing a pretty good job with including new story-lines to the original story.
Just delete ANY parts that say color, and you'll be okay.
Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, violet. Six colors of the rainbow, six elements of harmony. The missing one... Indigo!
Today's Special Guest Menace; Crunch, the Rock Dog!
mylittlewiki.org/w/images/thumb/3/32/Crunch.jpg/180px-Crunch.jpg
This is the first "Seventh Element" pony tale I've seen that actually has added extra challenges for the ponies that were not present in the Mane Timeline, and even added some of the background stallions. This is a good example of what I try to do for my tales "If you can't get around a meme', try and set the bar for it!" Great job!
( ... Oh, and this part seems missing a line or two... )
They wore purple and black flightsuits, with lightning yellow borders, the one in the middle was a mare while her escorts were stallions, Each of them had bone-white coats while their manes were an ominous blue, and their eyes Everfree Forest! And soon, we will be the greatest in all Equestria! But first… we need a captain”
she creeped up towards thew other girls. Ah the ever present typo, moving at twice the speed of smell.
should be how
also, in future stories i suggest using italics rather than underlines for emphasis
Okay, not gonna lie, that actually kinda caught me off-guard.
_
Ok, the picture link at the above part doesn't seem to be working for me, so I went to the artist's DeviantArt to find it. Based on their gallery, I'm guessing this is the missing picture:
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/9e6ebfed-09c0-4aef-b28f-52294d91f818/de3ggew-b365f79f-d48f-4b31-83b1-54c3cfa62471.png/v1/fill/w_1280,h_939,q_80,strp/commission_for_wolven5_by_mcshelster_de3ggew-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7ImhlaWdodCI6Ijw9OTM5IiwicGF0aCI6IlwvZlwvOWU2ZWJmZWQtMDljMC00YWVmLWIyOGYtNTIyOTRkOTFmODE4XC9kZTNnZ2V3LWIzNjVmNzlmLWQ0OGYtNGIzMS04M2IxLTU0YzNjZmE2MjQ3MS5wbmciLCJ3aWR0aCI6Ijw9MTI4MCJ9XV0sImF1ZCI6WyJ1cm46c2VydmljZTppbWFnZS5vcGVyYXRpb25zIl19.yVm-eaz_qOvfJ7gs1i0J7DtU75gEbk9YfSMt0oMMuxc
Am I right?