• Published 22nd May 2014
  • 1,233 Views, 56 Comments

Twisted Metal: Equestria - Lab Matt

Discord is free once again. And he brought back a game he created over a millennium ago, before his imprisonment.

  • ...

20. Cease And Desist

"Care to explain why are we here again?" Twilight asked from inside her new car - which wasn't very different from the previous one - as she looked at the entrance of the labyrinth in the Canterlot Gardens right in front of them.

"Oh, nothing special, I was just feeling a little nostalgic!" his disembodied voice explained.

"This doesn't seem very smart." Spitfire said. "After all, you're literally in the Princesses's front yard."

"Oh, you talk as if they had the power to stop me. Breaking news: they don't!"

Scootaloo shuddered, and Silver Spoon didn't missed that.

"Something wrong, Scoots?"

"It's this place..." she muttered.

"Oh, right. This is where you..."

"Yes, but it has nothing to do with this strange feeling I have." she focused her sight on the single wall blocking the only entrance. "I feel danger in there. But not the usual danger I feel emanating from Twisted Metal. This one I feel is... Worse, somehow!"

"By the way, I hope you don't mind, but I've been checking your records, so I decided to invite some of your... Friends!"

"I have a bad feeling about this..." Rainbow Dash said.

"But why, Dashie? I'm sure all of you will get along just fine!"

The wall blocking the entrance slowly turned into dust, which was carried by the wind, revealing the arena and three vehicles parked there:

The first was a light turquoise Ferrari with a yellow convertible roof. The pilot was a pegasus who used to have the same colors on her coat and mane, but now she was just a few shades away from being completely gray.

"Hey, ma'am!" Lightning Dust said while saluting Spitfire.

"Newbie?" Spitfire said, removing her goggles just in case her eyes were playing tricks on her.

The second was a brown motorcycle with an almost grey griffon standing right beside it.

"Long time no see, dweeb!" Gilda said while removing her helmet.

"G-G-Gilda?!" Rainbow Dash stuttered, not believing in who she was seeing.

"I see you're already got yourself a replacement. Another one, that is!"

"I am no replacement!" Fleetfoot said.

The third car was some kind of automated chariot driven by two nearly grey unicorns who were very similar to each other, the only differences being their Cutie Marks and the mustache only one of them had.

"Are my eyes deceiving me, brother of mine?" Flim, the youngest, asked while eyeing the Alicorn Princess.

"I don't think so, brother of mine." Flam, the oldest, said. "That is indeed Twilight Sparkle! Or, should I say, Princess Twilight Sparkle?"

Twilight sighed and facehoofed. "Not those two..."

"Now that we're all here, let's--"

"You're not going to start Twisted Metal without us, are you, Discord?" another disembodied voice could be heard but, unlike Discord's, which echoed throughout the area, this one seemed to come from inside their minds. The voice was of a young filly, but if one payed a lot of attention, it would seem that it was masking two other voices, one of a mare and the other of a stallion.

It wasn't long until a new contestant joined them. This one was driving Pinkamena's Sweet Tooth, but it had one big difference: every inch of it was covered in gold.

"Ohhh..." Fleetfoot said, the golden shine of Sweet Tooth reflecting on her eyes. "Shiny..."

"Isn't this a little bit excessive?" Soarin' asked.

"But of course not!" the driver said while lowering the window, revealing her poofy white and violet mane, dark pink coat, red and green eyes with purple smoke gently flowing out of them and a black magic crystal stuck in her forehead, emulating an unicorn's horn. "After all, the chariot of Equestria's future ruler should be nothing short of magnificent!" she tapped the side of theice cream truck. "Fillies and gentlecolts, bow before my Gold Tooth and you might have a place of respect in my kingdom!"

"D-D-Diamond... Ti-Tiara..." Silver Spoon said.

"Snap out of it, Silver Spoon!" Scootaloo said, glaring at the golden car. "That's not Diamond Tiara! Not anymore..."

"Where did you get gold enough to make this?" Discord asked. "I know you're powerful, Sombrero, but not enough to make gold out nowhere! Not without your body, at least."

"Simple!" the possessed Diamond Tiara said while rubbing the black crystal in her forehead. "All I had to do was improvise some magic with some dark crystals. From there, everything was so easy! This filly's father is swimming in money, I just had to hypnotize him, his employees and make them give all the golden bits they had to me. His company will probably bankrupt now, but why should I care?"

"Poor Mr. Rich..." Silver Spoon said.

"But let's not waste our time with the misery of others. I have a Twisted Metal to win. And when I do, Discord, your power is mine!"

"Is that Sombrero or Backstabber talking?"

"'Backstabber'?" she chuckled. "Hello, pot. My name is kettle. You're black."

"A-Anyway, let's not waste anymore time. Twisted Metal is starting!"

"About damn time!" Gilda said before jumping on her motorcycle. She pointed a claw at Rainboom. "You two!" she slowly moved her claw in front of her neck in a threatening way. "You're going down."

"Let's see who's the wingpony now, ma'am!" Lightning Dust said while revving the engine.

"Shall we destroy the pony who crushed our chances of conquering Sweet Apple Acres, brother of mine?" Flam asked.

"Of course, brother!" Flim said. "Let's not wait any longer."

"We're going to save you, Diamond Tiara."

"Don't bother." the possessed Diamond Tiara said. "She is far beyond the point of return. No more than an empty shell!"

"We'll see about that!"

* * *

"The time has come, Sister!" Luna said.

"I wish there was another way."

"There is no other way! Discord was stopped by us once and he must be stopped by us again. It is our destiny!"

"Destiny, huh?"

Together, the two sisters entered their previous castle in the Everfree Forest. They used their magic to open a secret passage which led to a secret room, where two massive vehicles were covered by giant blankets.

"So, which one you--"

"Warhawk is mine!" Luna said while galloping towards the biggest one.

Celestia sighed and shook her head. "Well, I guess this leaves Talon to me."

* * *

Friendship Report V2 had crashed against a wall. With some difficulty, Twilight managed to open the door and get out of it, but she only took a few steps before falling on the ground, breathing heavily. She had a cut on her forehead and the blood flowing out forced her to keep her left eye closed, but Twilight still managed to see the twins walking toward her.

"So, this is all the royalty is capable of nowadays?" Flam asked.

"I must say, I am not even close to impressed." Flim used his magic to force Twilight to face him. "I'm starting to think I could be a better royalty than you!"

"Don't get... So cocky." Twilight said, smiling. "My friends will soon be--"

"You mean these friends?" Gilda landed next to Flim and Flam, holding Rainbow Dash and Fleetfoot by the nape of their suits, both pegasi covered in bruises. She dropped both of them on top of Twilight, who gasped in shock and pain. "Those dweebs were easy to deal with! If those Wonderbastards are the Elite fliers around here, I feel sorry for Equestria."

"You mean the old generation of Wonderbolts, right?" Lightning Dust said while dropping Soarin' and Spitfire on the ground, grabbing the captain's goggles and wearing them. "With me on the top now, the new Wonderbolts will finally be something to look up to!"

"N... No..." Twilight said.

"Should we finish them now?" Flim asked.

"Well, I has hoping to make them suffer a little, but what the hey!" Guilda grabbed Rainbow Dash by the neck. "Let's have some fun."


The four attackers looked up, searching the source of the loud noise. On the sky, they located two flying vehicles; the first was dark blue and larger than the second, which was light pink.

"Are those...?" Flim started.

"Helicopters?!" Flam shouted. "Why didn't Discord said flying machines were allowed? Well, not that it would make the competition any different, we would still crush all of them, but we could test our new Super Speedy Battle Vehicle 9000."


"Pr... Princess..." Twilight muttered.

"Shut up, namby-pamby pony princess!" Gilda said while flying at full speed toward Warhawk.

"I tried to negociate, Sister." Luna said on a microphone.

"Sister, think rationally!" Celestia replied on Luna's headphones.

"I did! But those are Discord's minions. We either stop them, or they'll stop us!"

"But we must--"

"Protect our subjects! Even if we have to protect our subjects... From our subjects!" she once again used the microphone to address the competitors. "TIME'S UP!"

Luna pressed a button, making bullets from a machine gun rain upon Gilda, who had no problems in dodging every single one of them. Finally, she landed on the windshield.

"You do realize that if one of those bullets got even close to grazing my feathers you could have started a war, don't you?"

"The moment you sided with Discord, you turned into a criminal." Luna smirked and pressed another button. Gilda looked around at the metal rods that appeared throughout Warhawk's fuselage. "Your home country would thank me!"

The tip of all the rods lit up and created a wave of electricity around the helicopter, electrocuting the griffon.

Unconscious, Gilda fell from Warhawk, but was saved by Celestia's quick thinking, who shot a net at the griffon, then gently placed her on the ground. She frowned at Warhawk while Luna simply looked expressionlessly at Talon. Celestia then trapped the three ponies in a capturing net.

"This is nothing!" Flam said. "My brother and I can easily... Easily... Why isn't my magic working?"

Celestia smiled. "Magic inhibitor stones." she said referring to the rocks serving as the weights of the net. "When near those, Unicorns can't use magic, Pegasi can't fly and, while it doesn't have any immediate effects on Earth Ponies, prolonged exposure can make one fall into a deep coma! Their use was banned eight hundred years ago, but Talon is older than that."

"So, I suppose this wrap things up, huh?" Luna said. "We stopped this month's Twisted Metal before any lives were lost!"

Their attention switched from the ponies on the ground to an explosion that happened on the other side of the labyrinth. The Princesses immediately flew in its direction. There they found a Club Filly burned to a crisp not too far away from a burning crater. On the other side there was a golden ice cream truck with three fillies, the pink one using a magic crystal to levitate and choke the silver and the orange ones.

"No, you won't!" Celestia shot a capturing net at the filly, trapping her and making her drop the other two; they were unconscious, but still alive. Inside the net, Diamond Tiara screamed and squirmed in pain as the stones and the crystal resonated with each other, causing all of them to explode and spread a wave of magic energy across the area.

Several emergency lights of Talon and Warhawk started to flash and beep.

"Sister, I lost control of Warhawk!" Luna warned.

"I lost control of Talon, too!"

Luna's eyes widened when she saw Talon coming at her while Warhawk was falling toward it. "WE'RE GONNA CRASH!"

On the last moment, both Luna and Celestia teleported away from their vehicles in time to witness the explosion resultant from the crash of the helicopters.

When the dust settled, they saw a Draconequus standing on top of the wreckage, clapping.

"I must say, I was surprised by the last minute entrance, but that was a great show, so I'll accept you two as contestants!"

"Your game ends here, Discord." Luna said. "You already killed so many innocent creatures now and one thousand years ago, but no more! Everything ends here and now!"

"Oh, quit your whining. You two wiped out my entire race and you don't see me throwing a hissy fit because of it, do you?" he snapped his fingers, making all the wreckage turn into a comfortable armchair. "But I guess there's no way around it, is there? It's all over for poor, old Discord and his little Twisted Metal. But, before I go, I have one small request."

"No requests, Discord!"

"This one is simple! Look around, you won Twisted Metal!"

"In a sense, he's right." Celestia said. "So, I guess you want us to make a wish, correct?"

Discord nodded and gave her a smile, a wink and a thumbs up. "I don't want this tournament to go to waste, just one simple wish and it's all over."

Celestia sighed. "Okay, I'll indulge you, Discord!"

"Sister, nay! It's all a scheme!"

Celestia smiled. "Don't worry, Luna, I'll make sure to wish for something that cannot backfire." she cleaned her throat then took a deep breath. "No more dead bodies. No more unsafe streets, no more war. Your promise was and has been since the beginning of this unholy competition that the winner gets whatever they asks for. Whatever, Discord! Well, here's mine: I wish for a land with no more pain, no more tears and, above it all, no more Twisted Metal!"

Discord's smile grew wider, though it was no longer a simple smile, but one full of malicious intents.

"Sure, fine, your wish shall be granted, Princess Celestia of the Sun, who was far too generous, kind and concerned for this world."

The Draconequus snapped his fingers and Celestia was surrounded by a golden glow.

"A land without Twisted Metal, you say? Sure, I can do that! After all, there's no Twisted Metal on, let's say, the sun!"

And, with that, Celestia was gone.

Luna's eyes widened. "Wh-What did you do to my sister, you fiend?!"

"Granted her wish, of course! But cleaning all of Equestria of all evil and wickedness would be such a pain and take so long, so I decided to use plan B; instead of making Equestria safer, I just sent her to a safer place." Discord's smile grew even more wider. "And now that I think of it, you two were a team, were you not? So, whatever happens to her, also applies to you!"

Luna gasped and flapped her wings as hard and fast as she could, trying to fly away from him, but it was for naught: Discord snapped his fingers and she froze in place, surrounded by a blue glow.

"Sadly, two ponies living in the same place would eventually trigger a fight, and I cannot let that happen. To the moon with you, wittle Woona!"

Luna disappeared in a flash. On the sky, the moon appeared, once again with the head of a pony on it. Discord's evil laughter echoed throughout the labyrinth.

Author's Note:

Well, Hiatus is over! Are you ready for more?
Sorry if the quality has dropped a little, but it's been so long since last time I had the chance to write anything! My skills - I hope - are still with me, they're just a little rough around the edges.
Next chapter will be up soon - again, I hope.

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