Garry's Mod Vs. Equestria: ASDFMovie is Awesome!

by Fussan

The Weird Unicorn and Her Friend (Lyra and Bon Bon)

"So, did you hear about those three fillies?" the cream colored earth mare asked her unicorn companion, after taking a bite of her daisy and hay sandwich. It was delicious; crispy bread, rich, flavorful flowers, and fried hay--just a bit moist from the mayonnaise.

The mint green unicorn didn't answer. Nor did she blink, breathe, or even register that she had just been asked a question. She only stared off into the distance with a lost expression clouding her features. "They were here..." she whispered, her eyes beginning to glisten in the afternoon sun shining down on the pair. "They exist..."

Bon Bon stared in confusion at her friend across the table they were sitting at. "Uh... Lyra?"

Lyra only stared off into oblivion, oblivious to the hoof waving in front of her face and the shouting mare across the table. All she could think about was her dream of finally seeing one... maybe even meeting one. Talking to one... Touching one... Maybe even... No, that was simply wishful thinking. But still, the idea lingered.

Bon Bon waved her hoof more frantically. "Lyra? Lyra?! Can you hear me?! Lyra, c'mon, say something!" But despite even shouting at her friend, she was completely ignored, drowned out by the fanciful daydreams of the minty unicorn.

Lyra gazed at nothing and everything at once, her vision filled with the wild imaginations and lucid dreamings of a madmare. But a madmare with a purpose on this world of hers. "There were Humans... and they were right here in Ponyville..." She sighed dreamily, letting a wistful smile spread across her muzzle. "They were here... They're really, really real..."

Bon Bon let out an exasperated sigh, giving up on trying to get her friend's attention. "Lyra, if you don't answer me, I'm going to eat your sandwich," she threatened her friend.

Lyra gazed off into the distance, mumbling to herself about Humans and hands and feet and shoes and all kinds of things that shouldn't exist but did.

Bon Bon picked up Lyra's sunflower sandwich slowly, making sure she was as obvious as she could be. "I'm taking your sandwich now, Lyra," she told her friend.

Lyra only stared into the distance, lost in her own little world. One filled with Humans with hands that were only meant for her. Petting her, stroking her mane, giving her massages, making her feel... fulfilled...

Bon Bon raised the sandwich to her mouth, opening her mouth in preparation of eating it. "I'm about to eat your sandwich now, Lyra. You'd better stop me."

Lyra closed her eyes as her imagination took her to places that only she dared to go. Places that common ponies feared to even imagine, and gods dreaded the existence of. She felt the highs of frolicking with Humans, living amongst them and their hands, and all of their tools and devices and contraptions made for hands.

The sandwich entered Bon Bon's waiting mouth and her teeth gently closed on the bread. "I'm gonna eat it!" she said around the food item.

Lyra let out a throaty moan as her imagination took her farther down the darkest of paths.

Bon Bon glared at her friend, deciding enough was enough. "Fine then, have it your way," she said in a dangerous whisper. With a moment of mental preparation, she did it. She bit down on the sandwich.

Lyra's eyes blinked open. "Bon Bon?" she asked, looking across the table at her friend. She saw the sunflower sandwich half eaten hanging from her mouth. "Bon Bon, did you eat my sandwich?" she asked, clearly annoyed.

Bon Bon smiled widely, the sandwich falling from her mouth and her eyes going as wide as diner plates. "I am your sandwich," she said in an eerie voice.

What happened next would give anyone within viewing distance nightmares for months it was so horrible. Just as the cream colored earth mare said the words, she climbed over the table and forced her friend's mouth open, climbing into her gullet and wrenched her way down her throat. The noises were enough to induce projectile vomiting from many of the ponies, and the screams of pain and alarm from the minty unicorn was enough to cause a hardened stallion to cry like an infant.

The screams of pain also happened to work very well in covering up the loud laughter coming from a nearby pile of old tablecloths.

Author's Note:

Those last bits are only as dirty as you let your mind make them.

Comments

[Mosqueefo]

It's these short stories that make my day

[ButtonMash]

Thank you. I was waiting for this one! Next, while rainbow recovers and get out of the hospital, the moment she gets of the ground, someone yells 'everybody do the flop!' You know what happens next.

[Husqvarnic]

I know how dirty that was.

Bon Bon hadn't showered yet.

[Psycho]

4663379
I didn`t even remember that he was hit by a train, or I would have used the plane version!

[Average_NZ_Bronie]

I’m just waiting for the “hey hey, it says gullible on the Celling” “so it does -you stole my lungs”