Thousands of years following the story of Archmage, Twilight takes on a new student. One who doesn't know the first thing about advanced magic. One who needs to start from Square One.
Been reading this, but I am really beginning to get tired of the "Eeeeevil Apple Family!!!1!!!1!one!!!" trend through the fic. They've gone beyond "Look, the descendants of the Element of Honesty are jerks! Ironic, huh?" and far into Snidely Whiplash territory. If you wanted to make them seem darker than they are but reveal some secret that makes it understandable, too late. If you're wanting them to be cartoony ridiculous villains without ever lifting a hoof in-story, congratulations.
Rock On! Great job! Can't wait to hear more of what is going on with the Apple Family, you are building this up quite well if I say so myself. the suspense, etc...
All in all, Lovin' the story. Keep up the GREAT work!
I began to like nothing more than laying by her side as she told me the latest story about the valiant hero overcoming adversaries, discovering ancient and old magics, and of course, getting the girl at the end.
4736251 Long experience has taught me to never argue with my readers, as it gets me nowhere. So, wont argue here, and thanks for the compliment either way.
4736246 My readers have a nasty habit of giving me far more praise than what is due. "God of World Building", for example. Either way, sorry for blowing up your comments section, and as always, I await more.
4736310 Take it as a metaphor: You may not be a literal god of it, but it's just a way of saying that I think you're really good at it xD It's what you're known for, after all.
4736310 I have not read any of your work, so you'll be pleased to know my praise for you remains solely in the realm of what I've learned from your previous comments on my stories. I doubt I'll change the fact that I've not read any of your stories, as it's difficult for me to read much of anything these days.
Nevertheless, your praise for my stories is very well-accepted. I thank you for enjoying this story, and hopefully the others I've written.
Also: Your profile picture is amazing. I love playing Fiora, even if I'm not that good at her. Might you link me to the source so I can save it?
4735623 apart from the fact that i agree on the 'could care less' issue. I've gotta say that i like that song. though it can get surprisingly dirty if you look closely and I am not talking about that dictionary comment at the end.
There were three of them, named Jormangund, Io, and Tiamat. Each dragon was larger than the whole of Canterlot, and resistant to magic. They walked across the landscape, burning wide swaths of land before them.
you know, slowly i think basil has his roots somewhere with fluttershy and pinkie pie... wonder why the princesses didn't intervened ... or maybe they did, and the apples just play bad boys most of the time to show ponys how bad industrial revolution can go for everyone ...
Hey Loyal, took me a while to get to reading this and I can honestly wonder why it took me so long to get to it.
Though while the beginning was pretty rough, I guess you were going through the motions of trying to get down writing in 1st PPOV trying to balance internal thoughts and outside descriptions, it was quite reminiscent of the style you used when writing Archmage. I like that a lot of things have changed ever since Archmage in the 3000 years since Twilight ascended, I can't wait for the political/gangster/businesspony intrigue you're building with the Apple Family, I get the feeling that something big is going to happen and they will be in the middle of all of it. I also guess that Goldy will have something to do with it as well with her ties to the Family and all that. At the moment I'm not very worried with the strange magics around the Forest in Trottingham, it seems to be something that will go on for around five or six chapters before being resolved, unless other things will be going on as well, which is pretty likely considering who I'm talking to.
Anyway, will be following this and can't wait for the next chapter!.
p.s. Any update for Archamge Beyond the Crystal Mirror?
Oh that's interesting. I guess it'll have to do with the Apple Family huh? With the way you're building them up I can't help but see that they may have some part in Star's prophecy.
4762680 You will indeed be the first. As it stands, I'm in the market for some new cover art for Archmage. Iffen you feel up to the task, send it my way. I may even be coerced into compensating you for your time and effort.
4763027 My prices are often higher than the common guy is willing to go due to me being a painter, and needing alot of compensation for my time. I am however, one who values work done by other people. If you want to talk details or the like, i can PM you my skype or email and we can see what we could work out, i'd be happy to take whatever you would pay.
There were three of them, named Jormangund, Io, and Tiamat.
The Serpent of Midgard from Norse mythology. A Naiad-turned-heifer (because Zeus can't keep it in his pants) from Greek mythology. The goddess of the ocean (and chaos and creation) from Sumerian mythology.
Someone knows their ancient myths :) (Or played demons in Rage. Or both.)
Basil is ex-Apple-Family. Maybe split recently, maybe generations ago, but either way he goes right back to AJ. His hatred isn't personal, it's about the systematic betrayal of everything his ancestor stood for.
And a related prediction: if the elements do come into this, Basil is honesty. He's not exactly an open book about his past, but he's never once hesitated to speak his mind on things.
(And/or maybe I'm crazy. The two are definitely not mutually exclusive.)
Today, the Apple Mines produce the metal and gems we use to trade with the Griffons, and the old Appaloosa Desert grows just about all the food equestria needs.
Cap. ____________
I want to know the story about Basil and the Apple's as well. It seems both Basil and Twilight don't like them all that much. And the warning Twilight gave Star earlier makes me ashamed of the Apple Mafia.
More world building, yay!
Also, Gold and Star best couple. Cuz I say so.
Been reading this, but I am really beginning to get tired of the "Eeeeevil Apple Family!!!1!!!1!one!!!" trend through the fic. They've gone beyond "Look, the descendants of the Element of Honesty are jerks! Ironic, huh?" and far into Snidely Whiplash territory. If you wanted to make them seem darker than they are but reveal some secret that makes it understandable, too late. If you're wanting them to be cartoony ridiculous villains without ever lifting a hoof in-story, congratulations.
4733013
Oh we'll learn more about the Apple Family in the near future, I assure you.
Just, you know.
Go read something else if you don't like it.
Another great chapter!
IS GUD
MUCH GUD
IS VERY MUCH GUD
I likes this
10/10 Moustache
Rock On! Great job! Can't wait to hear more of what is going on with the Apple Family, you are building this up quite well if I say so myself. the suspense, etc...
All in all, Lovin' the story. Keep up the GREAT work!
4732924
Coming from the God of World building, that's quite high praise
Reminds me of Scheherazade
I really hate it when people say "could care less." It's couldn't. Couldn't care less.
4734966
4734966
I could care less... but I'd be hard-pressed to.
4734057 That's a bit much, isn't it?
4736187
Either way, the praise is much appreciated ^.^ I'm glad you're enjoying the story.
4736187
4736251 Long experience has taught me to never argue with my readers, as it gets me nowhere. So, wont argue here, and thanks for the compliment either way.
4736246 My readers have a nasty habit of giving me far more praise than what is due. "God of World Building", for example. Either way, sorry for blowing up your comments section, and as always, I await more.
4736310
Take it as a metaphor: You may not be a literal god of it, but it's just a way of saying that I think you're really good at it xD It's what you're known for, after all.
...That, and Octavia/Fiora crossover portrait
4736310
I have not read any of your work, so you'll be pleased to know my praise for you remains solely in the realm of what I've learned from your previous comments on my stories. I doubt I'll change the fact that I've not read any of your stories, as it's difficult for me to read much of anything these days.
Nevertheless, your praise for my stories is very well-accepted. I thank you for enjoying this story, and hopefully the others I've written.
Also: Your profile picture is amazing. I love playing Fiora, even if I'm not that good at her. Might you link me to the source so I can save it?
4735623 apart from the fact that i agree on the 'could care less' issue. I've gotta say that i like that song. though it can get surprisingly dirty if you look closely and I am not talking about that dictionary comment at the end.
4736648
That's what makes it so awesome. The subtlety is gold.
4736666 yes it is. yes it is.
I hereby dub thee: Chekov's Wyrms.
4736581 fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2012/286/0/8/octavia__the_grand_duelist_by_zedrin-d5hq0q8.png
There you goes!
BASIL. STAHP IT.
I wanna be on your side, but you're making it hard.
Commence read.
World building is good. Places to go, things to experience.
Now to see what awaits around the bend.
you know, slowly i think basil has his roots somewhere with fluttershy and pinkie pie...
wonder why the princesses didn't intervened ... or maybe they did, and the apples just play bad boys most of the time to show ponys how bad industrial revolution can go for everyone ...
Hey Loyal, took me a while to get to reading this and I can honestly wonder why it took me so long to get to it.
Though while the beginning was pretty rough, I guess you were going through the motions of trying to get down writing in 1st PPOV trying to balance internal thoughts and outside descriptions, it was quite reminiscent of the style you used when writing Archmage. I like that a lot of things have changed ever since Archmage in the 3000 years since Twilight ascended, I can't wait for the political/gangster/businesspony intrigue you're building with the Apple Family, I get the feeling that something big is going to happen and they will be in the middle of all of it. I also guess that Goldy will have something to do with it as well with her ties to the Family and all that. At the moment I'm not very worried with the strange magics around the Forest in Trottingham, it seems to be something that will go on for around five or six chapters before being resolved, unless other things will be going on as well, which is pretty likely considering who I'm talking to.
Anyway, will be following this and can't wait for the next chapter!.
p.s. Any update for Archamge Beyond the Crystal Mirror?
4749692
I'm working on it next, but my schedule is kind of shitty (has been for a few weeks now) so I doubt I'll get it done any time soon.
Furthermore, Square One will focus on one overall, arcing storyline, rather than several smaller plots.
4750111
Oh that's interesting. I guess it'll have to do with the Apple Family huh? With the way you're building them up I can't help but see that they may have some part in Star's prophecy.
dont be surprise when i drop a anthro'd star chaser sketch in your lap...
4762476
Being my first official piece of fan work, I will proceed to scream my brains out.
4762632 your kidding right? you've made somany awesome storys and havent gotten fan art yet? im going to have to fix that.
4762680
You will indeed be the first. As it stands, I'm in the market for some new cover art for Archmage. Iffen you feel up to the task, send it my way. I may even be coerced into compensating you for your time and effort.
4763027 My prices are often higher than the common guy is willing to go due to me being a painter, and needing alot of compensation for my time. I am however, one who values work done by other people. If you want to talk details or the like, i can PM you my skype or email and we can see what we could work out, i'd be happy to take whatever you would pay.
4763081
You can find me in either via:
jordanwilliams08@gmail.com
38.media.tumblr.com/93ed6fe9df0d1174ded2d077ff245bd9/tumblr_n9flo6B00l1r5ri1lo1_r1_500.jpg
anthro Star Caster.
i apologize in advance for any head cannons that i may have just killed
fixed for glasses
4765000
You forgot the glasses, but otherwise, holy shit O.o
4765243 ffffffff-
fixed it
The Serpent of Midgard from Norse mythology.
A Naiad-turned-heifer (because Zeus can't keep it in his pants) from Greek mythology.
The goddess of the ocean (and chaos and creation) from Sumerian mythology.
Someone knows their ancient myths :)
(Or played demons in Rage. Or both.)
Also, a shot in the dark:
Basil is ex-Apple-Family. Maybe split recently, maybe generations ago, but either way he goes right back to AJ. His hatred isn't personal, it's about the systematic betrayal of everything his ancestor stood for.
And a related prediction: if the elements do come into this, Basil is honesty. He's not exactly an open book about his past, but he's never once hesitated to speak his mind on things.
(And/or maybe I'm crazy. The two are definitely not mutually exclusive.)
remove
thank
Cap.
____________
I want to know the story about Basil and the Apple's as well. It seems both Basil and Twilight don't like them all that much. And the warning Twilight gave Star earlier makes me ashamed of the Apple Mafia.
7257079
On your fixes.
"much more easier" and "Would that we could" are rather common turns of phrases. So those work.
And "You, move" the pause that the comma represents is fitting. Since it shows that he pauses as he's addressing Goldy.