Discord sat quietly in the mind-verse (as he so chose to call it), staring across at his supposed double.
No. Not double. He couldn't call it that. This wasn't Discord; wasn't him. This was some sort of psychotic version of something that wanted nothing more than to cause pain.
Was he... ever like that? He knew that he never wanted to kill, but...
That attitude. The way that this nutcase carried itself. Did he used to act like that? Taking so much joy in the suffering of others and caring about no one but himself?
He looked down to Fluttershy, who was still unconscious in his arms. He felt a twinge of guilt rise within his heart, remembering the day he had turned her against her friends. It felt like forever ago...
She became the opposite of who she was, and while it made him laugh a thousand times over all those weeks ago... he just felt sorry now. He didn't want to admit it, but the copy standing in front of him now was what he used to be, at least in a sense.
However, unlike himself, who merely shut out the emotions that made him more passionate and loving, this... thing, didn't have anything to shut out. It was a lesser form of himself; that's all he could call it.
With that in mind, he couldn't help but wonder. If he had never been reformed... never turned to stone...
Was this what his fate would've been? To become like that?
It was odd for the thought to suddenly come to mind, but he assumed that it was the fault of the mind-verse. His body probably wasn't even there; it was all in some sort of mental existence where his mental body just happened to look like his physical body because that's what he identified with. Obviously, he could be wrong, but he figured that the mind-verse tested the boundaries of one's mind. No repressed memories were allowed; he saw everything he ever did at once. Every corner of his mind was being peered into at once.
Curiously, he examined Fluttershy, wondering if she looked any different to confirm his suspicion of a mental body. Instantly, he noticed the white rose in between her mane and ear, which was completely unwilted.
A small smile tugged at his lips, his claw reaching up to gently stroke the side of her head. She moaned slightly in response, nuzzling against his body affectionately.
"D-Discord..."
He held her closer, shaking his head. "Shh, Fluttershy. Stay asleep for now."
Discord heard a chuckle in front of him, then glared at his imitation.
It smirked. "Isn't that just adorable?"
He huffed. "If you think you're going to make me let go of her and come back to you, then you're going to find yourself rather disappointed."
The fake raised a brow. "Oh? Is that a fact? You know full-well that this is my specialty."
Discord tilted his head, jabbing a thumb at himself. "I'm well-aware; because it's mine too."
"Is it now?"
The imposter walked over, and Discord gripped Fluttershy protectively.
"Because, if you ask me, I'd say that you're losing your touch," it said, shrugging casually. "After all, without me, you have no power visually. The only thing that snapping your fingers does anymore is make a sound."
It snapped its fingers and grinned, the word 'sound' appearing in front of it. It grabbed it, then crushed it in its hands. "And I don't mean like that~"
Discord rolled his eyes. "And? You say that as if it's a big deal."
The copy grew closer, its gaze sharpening. "So it's not? Are you saying that you never once thought of getting your powers back?"
He opened his mouth to respond, but quickly shut it.
"Hmmm~? Is that a 'no'?" it asked, tilting its head with an amused gaze.
Discord shook his head. "I could say that, but it'd make me a liar. Admittedly, I've had moments where I wanted my powers back. But..."
He pulled Fluttershy closer for emphasis. "I never thought about going back for them. It was never a need, and the life I have now—"
"—Is BORING," it argued, throwing its hands up in the air. "You haven't caused a single chaotic explosion in what seems like forever!"
Discord glared harshly. "Chaos isn't the only thing that's ever made me happy. It used to be, but not anymore."
His double rolled its eyes, facepalming as it frowned. "You idiot! Chaos was our life! Our goal was to bring it everywhere we went! Ugh, I'm ashamed to have been a part of you."
Discord smirked. "Feel free to never come back."
"Ohhh no. Don't think you can get away like that," it told him. "I still need your body for chaotic conquest; it's just a matter of wearing you down until I can reclaim it."
"You act as if its yours," he said, raising a brow doubtfully.
"That's because it is! That body wasn't made for normality and harmony! It was made for destruction! Desecration! Disorder! Your name is Discord for crying out loud! You allowed yourself to sink to the low level of these ponies, and now look at you! You're disgraceful!"
Discord wagged a finger. "Hey now, you just said my name is Discord. It's not 'Disgraceful'! If you're going to insult me, you might as well get my name right for this whole conversation."
The fake's gaze sharpened, its ears flopping down in anger at the realization that Discord was merely toying with it.
"Do not mess around with me. You will hand over my body, and I'll be certain to burn your remaining personality as painfully as possible."
Discord faked a yawn. "Sorry! I can't hear you over your obvious lack of friends."
The copy growled somewhat, rushing at Discord and getting right in his face.
"Do you honestly think that I won't hurt you in here? You're putting on this act just to spite me until I give up on you. Do you recall the glorious chaotic acts we used to perform together?"
Discord raised an open hand to his ear. "Is there an echo? I feel like I've just heard this before."
At first, the imitation said nothing, gazing at Discord with an emotionless face. A few minutes seemed to pass, at which point it stepped backwards, tightening its hands into fists.
"You are going to take me seriously. You don't deserve to have that body!" he said with a raised voice, pointing an accusing finger at Discord.
The draconequus rolled his eyes, but mentally admitted that there was a sudden shift in the copy's tone.
But, as long as he kept his cool, things should be fine... right?
"I may not, but I think it's safe to say that I deserve it much more than you."
It huffed in response, but slowly began to smirk. "Is that right?"
"Ye—!"
Discord winced suddenly, feeling a sharp pain shoot across his lion arm. He bit back a yell, glancing over to see a large cut across his shoulder, the fur around it slowly turning red.
Instantly, his tone shifted. His doppelganger wasn't going to mess around with words anymore.
Discord turned his head back, taking a small breath before speaking.
"Alright then. Let's talk."
The fake chuckled darkly. "Yes. Let's."
It gestured its hands out, flexing its fingers as a small ball of energy appeared in its hands. "Now that I have your undivided attention, perhaps I should give you one last chance? Let me remind you of the power you possessed."
The copy snapped its fingers, and the ball flew up, then behind him. It merged into the ground, promptly turning into a large fire. The fire slowly expanded, forming eyes and a mouth as it stared at Discord.
It opened its mouth, shooting small dragons at the draconequus, though they did nothing more than bounce off his face before disappearing in puffs of smoke.
His copy laughed wildly. "A dragon-breathing fire. How's that?" it asked, rubbing its hands together as sparks of electricity formed between them.
Discord turned his head away slightly, refusing to respond.
The fake gritted its teeth, snapping its fingers again to banish the fire. "Do you realize my power? Our power?" it questioned.
It waited for Discord to respond, but when he didn't, it clapped its hands. The white room began to collapse somewhat, revealing cracks of black everywhere. The cracks extended outwards, turning into a dark array of chaotic colors.
"I can distort everything to my will, Discord. Would you rather die here than surrender your body to me?"
Discord blinked, acting unphased by the threats despite the distorting world around him.
The imposter smirked. "Or perhaps you'd give in if I can eliminate the yellow symbol in this equa—"
Suddenly, it was Discord's turn to get in someone's face. He stood in front of his copy, his squinting visage almost laughable had it not been for the rage he was letting off.
"You will not - I repeat - you will not, touch, Fluttershy."
The imitation stared speechless for a moment, mostly stunned by the speed at which Discord had gotten up.
Fluttershy was still cradled in his arms, but this time, she actually moved, shifting about as one of her front hooves reached up to his shoulder.
Discord's angry gaze faded as he looked down at her. She was only partially conscious, but he didn't want her in the middle of this in the slightest. "Fluttershy, shh. Everything's fine."
The yellow pegasus swallowed, as if trying to cure a dry throat. "Mmm... Discord..."
The draconequus' mouth twisted, as he wasn't sure how to feel; he was glad that she was awake, but was worried that she had become conscious at a bad time.
"...Yes?" he asked cautiously.
"Pinkie...Pinkie Pie and Twilight... were wrong, mmf..." she murmured.
Discord raised a brow; she didn't seem to be aware of what was going on.
"You're...you're not the... ngh... Element of Selflessness. Not to... me..."
The fake standing in front of Discord chuckled slightly. "Ah, seems she's turning on you~"
Discord wasn't listening to it at that point, all of his attention locked to Fluttershy.
She nuzzled her head into his fur, breathing softly as she continued.
"You're... you're more than that. You're so... important to me. I think... I think..." Her voice trailed off for a moment, but quickly came back.
"I think you're... the Element of... Emotion."
Discord blinked confusedly, but Fluttershy continued before he could say anything.
"You've stirred up... so many emotions in everypony. Good, bad... so many emotions. I know that ponies get... mad at you, but that's... just because they don't know you yet. Your friends... all forgave you... despite all the things you've done. Doesn't that... doesn't that tell you something?"
She curled up, lovingly cuddling against him.
"I don't know if it... helps you feel better, but..."
The pegasus went quiet, and Discord shook her lightly in response, at least wanting her to finish.
"...you made me a better pony... because of it. You...you stir a lot of emotions in me too..."
Discord gazed down at her as her mouth closed, informing him after a few seconds that she was done talking.
The fake looked at him, chuckling again. "How sickeningly sweet. It appears that we've come at an impasse then. Unless I pry that mare away from you, you won't cooperate with me, right?"
The draconequus was silent at first, then glanced back at the copy and smirked. "Oh, I'd very much like to see you try."
It blinked confusedly at the sudden taunt, then returned the smirk. "Very well then."
It backed away, snapping its fingers as the fire reformed itself, charging at Discord.
However, it suddenly stopped as it reached him, as if frozen in place.
"W-what!?" the imitation questioned, its mouth agape as it stared at the sight.
Discord grinned. "You would do well not to play with my darling Fluttershy. She just caused me to realize something."
The fire flew back into action, but hit the ground harshly as the room began to fade back to normal.
"This little world you've placed us in; it's powered by the mind, is it not? You led Fluttershy and I here because you believed with no doubt that you had the ability to overpower me on mind alone; any magical powers are nonexistent here."
The fake shot him a quick glare, but went back to a neutral expression right afterwards.
Discord smirked, holding Fluttershy with one arm and snapping his fingers. A small ball of energy appeared in his hand, which he swiftly threw at his double.
The doppelganger chuckled. "Ha! So you've figured it out then. But really, there's no way you can—!"
Its voice cut off abruptly as its arm was blown clean off, disintegrating into nothingness.
"W-what!? I-I—"
"—It's like I said," Discord told it, summoning another ball of magic with the snap of his fingers. "This place is powered by the mind, and with Fluttershy and I here, you have no power."
The fake glared at him, its form changing back to a floating ball of chaotic energy.
"Ha! As if you would ever actually try to defeat me! Fool! I am your chaotic powers! If you destroy me, you'll never get them back, ever!"
Discord paused, his hold on Fluttershy tightening. "...Then you better start writing your will, hm?"
The draconequus held out his hand and fired, a beam of light breaking through the copy, which cringed from the contact.
"N-no! I won't allow this!" it yelled, trying to fight against the light. "You're the spirit of chaos, and yet you allow this pony to drive you? That's not chaotic in the slightest; it's just stupid!"
Discord glared back, the light intensifying with every second as he watched his chaotic powers slowly disintegrate.
"Chaos doesn't define me. I define chaos."
The energy flinched, pushing back against the light. "Rrr! If I... if I'm going to die, then I'm taking you with me!"
Discord's eyes widened as he watched it rebel against his light, charging towards him despite its continuous dissipation.
The draconequus gripped Fluttershy in a brief embrace, then threw her to the side before feeling a sudden pressure on his body that almost instantly faded.
However, pain then struck his entire being, and he fell to the ground as the world began to fade around him.
"...Nnn...?"
Fluttershy stirred slowly, feeling somewhat sore as she slowly opened her eyes.
"W-wha...what happened?"
She brought a foreleg to her head, rubbing it gently as she looked around. Almost instantly, she recognized the area as the place were Tirek had fought Twilight all those weeks ago.
But... what am I doing here?
She winced, her head throbbing as she tried to recall. She remembered Discord leaving, then feeding her animals...
And then nothing.
She blinked, recalling her nightmare last night, where she had similar thoughts. Did this mean something? Did—
Immediately, Fluttershy stopped thinking as she heard a groan from behind her. She jerked her head around, recognizing the voice as Discord's.
"D-Discord?"
He was just laying there, barely moving and looking badly cut up, most of his wounds bleeding and seeping into his fur.
"DISCORD!"
Fluttershy rushed to his side, gently shaking him and trying to get him to grow conscious again.
"Discord? Discord, please say something!"
Despite her pleas, the draconequus remained quiet, his breathing being very soft and weak.
Now panicking, Fluttershy looked around, hoping to find someone who could help. She couldn't very well leave him on the edge of the Everfree Forest; not like this.
"S-somepony! Anypony!" she cried out in desperation.
"HELP!"
She waited, but got no response, gazing back at Discord tearfully.
When did this happen? Had she just been asleep? She remembered speaking to him, but he wasn't responding to her. Was that a dream? She couldn't remember...
"Dis...Discord..."
She sobbed, not knowing what to do. If he remained out here for too long, his cuts were bound to get infected, but leaving him to go get help would allow the Everfree animals to attack him. She couldn't carry him or drag him in a safe manner either, so she was at a loss for what she could do.
"I-it's okay," she muttered, her hoof reaching up to lightly stroke his face. "T-Twilight'll come looking for us. We can t-take you to a hospital, and everything w-will be alright..."
She paused, staring back down at his wounds.
"Everything will be alright..." she repeated, as if to convince herself.
Her foreleg went back to the ground, though her gaze remained locked on her love.
Love...
When had that all happened? Long ago, she never considered that she'd ever find somepony.
Well, technically, that still held water; Discord wasn't a pony at all.
She hadn't even realized that she was in love with him at first. She had just treated him like a friend.
Then, one day, she was walking along the floor, pausing as she saw Discord asleep on the couch, which had been chaotically transformed into a bed. All of her plans and errands were forgotten suddenly, and she just found herself staring at the draconequus for a few seconds. A few seconds turned into a few minutes, and he then began to wake up, causing Fluttershy to jump and instantly look away.
He yawned, rubbing an eye before looking over at her as the bed returned to its normal couch-y state.
"Good morning, dear Fluttershy."
Dear. Dear Fluttershy. Now, he called her 'darling' as opposed to 'dear', but she still couldn't forget the original.
Mostly because, the moment he had called her that on that morning, her heart leapt up like never before.
"G-good morning, D-Discord," she had said in response, swallowing nervously with shaky forelegs. She didn't know why she was suddenly stuttering, but Discord went to her side and felt her forehead.
"Something wrong, hm~? The animals will rebel if I've let you get sick~" He chuckled, and the combination of that along with his close contact made her cheeks burn up like a thousand of Celestia's suns.
"Y-yeah, I'm alright!" she replied, nodding her head slowly.
Discord raised a skeptical brow, but accepted it anyway, shrugging and moving around the room.
"If you say so~" he sing-songed.
Fluttershy hadn't even shifted her hooves anywhere for a few seconds after that, her mouth dropped slightly as she stared at the draconequus.
Slowly though, she regained use of her mouth, mumbling quietly under her breath.
"Discord, I think I'm in love with you."
Fluttershy blinked the memory away, sighing softly. Discord hadn't heard her then, but would it had made a difference if he had? Maybe he would've never betrayed them for Tirek, or even considered it!
She paused, then shook her head. That didn't matter now.
She drew her gaze back to Discord's wounds, frowning.
However, she abruptly blinked at the sight.
Then blinked again.
Most of his cuts were cleaned suddenly. She couldn't even explain how; she had zoned out at her memory, and then... this.
She raised a brow and twitched an ear, trying to make sense of it.
...And that's when she noticed.
That's when she realized that she was closer to Discord than before.
That's when she caught herself mid-lick.
...No...
No. Tell me I didn't just...
Fluttershy withdrew her tongue, only now taking note of the metallic taste in her mouth. Her hoof rose to her snout, lightly touching it as the realization dawned on her.
For the past five or so minutes, she had just sat there.
And she had licked most of Discord's wounds clean.
Instantly, her mind raced as she questioned why. Her mind became disgusted by her own actions.
Yet... she found that it had been effective. The wounds she had licked were clean and no longer bleeding.
Slowly, she thought back to her animals; they would do this all the time, but ponies? She had never seen it before.
Perhaps she had spent so much time with her critters. Maybe that was why.
She learned their language. Learned their mannerisms. Had they... rubbed off on her?
Inside, she feared Discord's reaction to such an act. Ponies didn't do this. They didn't lick each other's cuts clean; they got bandages and first-aid kits, or rushed the injured pony to the hospital.
However, Fluttershy didn't have those luxuries right now. She only had the determination to help Discord in anyway she could.
And no amount of fear from the possible disgust she'd receive would stop that.
Without hesitance, she crawled next to Discord, huddling against his side in hopes that he would sense it. Almost instinctively, her tongue touched another cut.
Everything will be okay, Discord.
I promise...
4438309 Thank you!!! I'll read it right now!! :D
Whoa...this was epic...
4438401
S-SERIOUSLY!?
*starts hyperventilating in relief*
I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD LIKE THIS NGDBHGSJZ F
Loved It! why did you think we'd hate it
4438408
JGKJSDHG I DUNNO.
JUST...
...
I DUNNO.
Say, you notice something weird on this chapter? I mean, there was some weird graphic stuff around sentences just as this:
Could just be me, but this seemed rather odd...
4438412
That was on purpose.
Discord's chaotic energy was distorting the words of the chapter.
...Guess I failed to convey that properly, eheh...
4438415
No you didn't fail to. Though Is it supposed to be an image or is it supposed to look like code?
4438415 Huh. How did you do that?
I'm not sure what you have here that would make me hate this chapter. I thought it was so brilliant and F L U F F Y!!! SQUEE!!
The whole concept is just very unique on its own. To make Discord's powers its own entity was an idea I never would have thought of, much less one that would use Discord's mind against him. And just the whole scene was dark and epic, but with it's own humor added in as a relief, and the jokes were quite funny; they had me laughing. I love Discord's humor and sarcasm, and to think it got to his own old power! So funny!
And I think Fluttershy is right; he IS more like the element of Emotion. He holds it back in the beginning, but now he lets it all out and experiences it all in one big frenzy...and it makes sense that now it affects Fluttershy. He has given her so many emotions...First fear, then friendly affection, frustration, anger, happiness, laughter, confusion, love, love, and more love...And the way you wrote it, with Discord facing off his enemy while tenderly holding Fluttershy...That''s a picture so cute it will never leave my mind. And honestly, Fluttershy's reaction to Discord at the end...To me, I think that makes sense too. She's so upset she's back to the animal instincts she's so familiar with. I understand that the ponies are the lead race, pretty much, so Fluttershy licking Discord would be like a human licking his or her lover, and it's supposed to be, like, taboo or something. But Fluttershy is the animal caretaker, and in stress, people (or in this case, ponies), will do crazy things. I can't wait for the update!!! Thank you so much! Love love LOVE IT ALL!
4438420
It's just supposed to look like distortion around the text.
4438422
Found a website that messed with the text I put in; made sure to make it readable and copy-pasted it into here~
4438427
Well, first off, I was worried that Discord getting rid of his powers permanently would be something that everyone'd hate me for.
Secondly, I thought that everyone would find Fluttershy's licking kinda gross. I thought it was a sweet gesture, hence why I put it in, and I even built up the fact that she was very animalistic (Curling up like a kitten/perching like a bird), but I still feared that people would react like "EW, FLUTTERSHY WOULDN'T DO THAT."
These lines are messed up. As for this chapter, Fluttershy licking Discord's wounds literally?
Edit: Nevermind, I read the comments.
4438464
Ngh, I thought it was a nice touch, but I guess I should get rid of them if no one seems to get it. TwT
That ending literally made me go, "Oh my god, what's happening right now?"
However, after that, thinking it over... it totally makes sense. It was foreshadowed by Twilight earlier in the story that the animals Fluttershy watches over rub off on her, which is understandable. If you're around them for so long, you see all their actions, instincts, et cetra, and sticking with them after a long while can cause you to inherit those instincts. Think of Donny from The Wild Thornberries or Tarzan from... yeah. They grew up with other animals, and over time, they started becoming more like who they were around.
She had no first-aid kits, no bandages. Instincts kicked in while her memories distracted her, and they cleaned the wounds. Her brain knew it would work for any other animals, and norms are thrown out the wind when someone is in danger.
As for Discord destroying his chaotic powers forever, well, he has long since realized that his powers were less significant than friendship and Fluttershy. Since the fake was a danger, it needed to be dealt with, and while he knew the risks, they didn't matter because if it meant Fluttershy becoming harmed - his protective hold on her before he replied tells me this much - then it's gotta go.
Fluttershy's flashback is so adorable, even in the midst of this scenario. More painful suspense to end it off. Let's hope Twilight or someone decided to take a stroll toward the Everfree Forest.
4438684
Ahhhh, I can't handle your nice comments.
JKSDBJGSBDKGJ
Please update soon
4438751
Don't I always?
4438483 Hee hee, thanks! I didn't draw it though; need to find out who did...
I can't wait for more!
THIS MADE ME CRY TEARS OF JOY!!!!
Why?
I mean, there are a couple details (like the lack of transition between Fluttershy's memory of the past and what was going on at the moment), and I rarely enjoy cliffhanger chapters (this one's alright), but why hate the chapter? It didn't break immersion or commit the sin of total story archetype shifting (my name for when an author writes one type of story, then it suddenly alienates that part of the story and changes to another type).
And you have cool ideas that make sense (as far as fiction goes).
This chapter is not something to hate........it's really took a grant risk and it did pay off
Did I see Dragon Ball and Starfox references when 'alternate Discord' is being destroyed?
Nice story, btw. I didn't like the premise of our friendly chaotic spirit giving away his essence, and some things are a bit rushed, but the overall balance is positive. Given I read the prequel, too, I'm talking about both of them.
4438902
Thank ya! <3
4439875
YOUR COMMENT MADE ME CRY TEARS OF JOY!!!!
4439949
I just have serious self-esteem issues and thought this chapter sucked, basically.
Well, that, and just overall I took two risks that I thought everypony would hate me for.
4440139
Aww, thank you.
4440189
Maybe you did.
> w >
Maybe you didn't.
< w <
Ahh, thanks. I'm not the greatest writer or anything, so I'm glad that you at least think that I have a nice balance...
4440317 Believe me when I say that you write waaaaaaaay better than most fanfiction authors. I'm tired of OOC, shippings created from nowhere, Mary Sue and other errors. These two stories of yours create a plausible scenario based on hinted plots (albeit the "I get rid of my powers" thing, but I talked about that earlier), and develop it nicely. That's something rarely seen these days, and you deserve credit for that.
PS: I was expecting some Flutterbat, and you know why
PS2: Powers destroyed? I don't think so. Law of conservation of energy applies, since magic is a form of energy
4440394
The whole 'get rid of his powers' thing was based off my reaction to the season finale. I was in a Skype call with a friend when I asked, 'hm... what if Discord hadn't gotten his powers back'?
That just led to a huge discussion in my head about what his reaction would be. Then I got to thinking about DiscoShy and here we are, 11 chapters later.
And yeah, I figured you'd be looking for Flutterbat, but that logic would only work if vampire bats ran off of actual vampire logic. You can make it your headcanon that she's running on Flutterbat instincts though.
Also, as for powers destroyed, I only have one thing to say...
I, am an idiot.
No, seriously.
I was never good at science, history, whatever. I can't remember my lessons to save my life and I probably fall somewhere in that 'too dumb to live' category.
In my mind, the chaotic energy needs a body to survive. The personality that Psycho!Discord had kept it stable, but it couldn't stay that way for long. Once Discord destroyed the personality, the energy went with it.
...Wow. That sounds really friggin' stupid now that I explain it. brb need to go lie down and rethink life.
I actually enjoyed this chapter. I love the whole scene between Discord and his double retorting against each other. You write him spot on. I liked how u mentioned in the previous chapter when rainbow said fluttershy looked like a bird when she perched beside her friend in the tree, so the whole cleaning discord's wounds by licking wasn't so shocking, she just did what nature would do given the circumstances without nearby help.
All in all, I enjoyed it! Don't sell yourself short!
4440510
Awww, thank you!
There's actually another hint in the very first chapter if you squint hard enough.
4440531
That was adorable too, add her purring and it's too cute for words
4440664
She actually purred in the original 'script' for that chapter.
After Discord tells her that she was like a kitten, Fluttershy looks at him and mutters, "W-wha? R-really?"
Then he nods and chuckles with amusement. "I didn't even know that ponies can purr."
And then Flutters gets all embarrassed.
4440459 Actually, chaos is a force of nature. It's true that Discord embodies it, but getting rid of it would only lead to its liberation and fusion with the world, although diluted since it's no longer confined inside a normal body. I hope I'm explaining myself correctly
As for Flutterbat, I said it based on the last scen from Bats!
4440774
Yeah, I understand...
4440715
Awww, u should've kept that in
4440867
Shhhh.
Shh, shh~
Don't worry.
Just be patient~ I left it out of the first chapter for a reason~
I found this chapter...
To have a perfect mix of adorableness, and awesomeness.
And the licking was unexpected but definitely not off-putting. Like everyone else has said, it makes sense that all creatures fall back on baser instincts in times of crisis. And we know the varying levels humans react at when they respond to situations like this.
And with the energy thing. Energy dissipates as it's used up. And , like you said, most energy can't exist without some sort of containment that sustaiins it. Look at electricity in wires. If the cord splits o anything, the electricity may arc for a second, but then it dissipates.
See, I didn't hate this chapter. It had it's good sides, a battle in the center of the mind seems fitting. I already touched on the powers thing, though I will add that it seems this entire mess was caused by him throwing off his powers. In my mind, it just goes to show the old "great powers, great responsibilities", which in this case means literally keeping track of and control over them. But that's just me.
Though I get where you're going with the Emotion thing, it falls a little flat, considering that isn't a value either. Then again, magic and Flutters is a little out of it here. Cute what she says about it though.
Discord vs Discord is really interesting and their back and forth is pretty good, though you hit just off the mark here and there and there is no logic to the statement "I define chaos", which, in a weird eternal loop makes it nonsensical and that makes it weirdly meta in my head.
Love that Flutters has picked up mannerisms from birds and stuff. Her falling back on a mess of instincts seems really fitting with her being involved with Discord.
All in all, you have a wealth of good ideas and a pretty decent execution, though sadly not perfect. Then again, you write for yourself, I expect, and not specifically for me, so I'll just be glad that we agree enough that I can enjoy this.
So, good work and happy writing on the next chapter, I'll just leave a fave and a like.
4441313
Ahhh, I'm being defended. >////< I can't handle all these feels~!
4441409
Yeah, I've just kinda slowly lost my confidence in this story though out all these chapters. No by fault of anypony, just... I guess I just felt like I was fighting with people's moral values; I even had a few friends who couldn't make it through this chapter without feeling uneasy...
One of your comments here did make me laugh though:
You remember who we're talking about, don't you? It's not supposed to make total sense!
4441313
In fact, that's what I said: it dissipates, not disintegrates. A container allows us to keep certain forms of energy under control, but if it escapes, its existence doesn't end: it transforms into another form, or fuses with nature, thus seemingly disappearing. But it doesn't.
4441443
What's the fun in making sense
Well, I found this chapter to have a lot of licking.
5248864
Yeah, I was pretty slick with that. :3
Aaawwwww! Fluttershy licking Discord's wounds was so.....sweet.....I think I'm gonna die from over exposure of pure adorablness!