Chapter One: Blank Generation
Chapter One: Blank Generation
Within the Everfree forest, a gnarled, ancient mangrove sagged to one side. An enormous gaping wound remained where its other side once grew. A thick hide was stretched tight across the gap to protect against the forest’s sometimes vicious weather. Various charms, potions and wards hung low from what branches remained. Above the door, a single mask depicting a tribal spirit greeted any visitors who might stop by.
Not that the zebra who called the tree “home” had had too many of those in recent times.
Zecora busied herself over her cauldron, chanting in her native Everfree tongue. The liquid within sparked and fizzled, showering her hut with residual drops of magical solution. Joints creaking, she winced and moved toward a shelf.
Time had not been kind to the mare. When not confined to her bed, lacking energy, her bones and muscles complained at any major movement. Even her unparalleled knowledge of roots, herbs, grasses, and most potent potions could only ease her discomfort so much.
“My seventy-fifth year approaches swift,” she mumbled. “My mind has little time to drift.”
She reached up with her mouth and gripped the stem of a single silver bell.
“Some Neverbloom for days unseen,” she said through clenched teeth. “With this I hope my brew does gleam.”
She dropped her front legs to the ground, the stem tearing from its base with her descent. She winced as a jolt shot through her upon impact.
“Oh, how my muscles ache and groan, together with my tired old bones.”
She stiffened and closed her right eye—the one not covered by a black patch. Still grasping the Neverbloom, she ambled back toward her cauldron. She grunted with each step, her eyebrow twitching. She concentrated on her breathing as she opened her eye, looking at the cauldron’s still-sparking contents. She sniffed long and hard; her smile spread, punctuated by an unwelcome coughing fit.
“Bark of a yew, some morning dew—add Neverbloom and let it stew. When destiny deems the time is right, this brew shall sparkle silver bright.”
Zecora held the flower against the rim of her cauldron with a hoof. She gripped the delicate silver head in her teeth and moved her head down, taking a single petal with it. Then, she flicked her head up and released her hold with both teeth and hoof. While the petal fell into the cauldron, the mutilated remainder immediately shriveled up and dropped. It darkened to the colour of soil, adding to the multitudes of decomposing floral matter on the floor.
Zecora kept her gaze upon the cauldron’s surface while she pumped a set of bellows below it with her left hoof. Glowing embers became dancing flames as they licked up the sides of her centrepiece before settling into a quietly crackling, controlled burn.
Zecora huffed and trotted back over to a small stove on the other end of her potted plant-covered shelves. She gripped the kettle and moved it to a bench nearby; a few droplets leapt out of the end and spilled onto the element, where they hissed and evaporated. Ignoring the sound, she angled her head so that her teacup filled almost to the top. A swirling cloud of brown leaves rose to the surface.
She watched the swirling tea for a full minute, blowing gently until it settled. Pursing her lips, she took a tentative sip before flicking the rest out her window. She set the cup down and waved a hoof over the top. A glance into the cup’s bottom revealed the leafy layout of an alicorn, its wings outstretched and a circular orb above its head.
“I see, Your Majesty—the answer is clear. You seek release from the vicegrip of fear.”
A strange gurgling sound alerted Zecora to her cauldron. She limped over to stare at the surface; her eye widened at the sight of hundreds of small water beads, dancing around the edge in a vortex like a plug had been pulled from beneath. A glow crept from the depths up the sides of the miniature maelstrom. The edge of the brew tinted the walls a metallic silver as the glow bounced off the cauldron’s rim.
Zecora’s ears perked up when a gust of wind blew her window shut with a crash, and snuffed out all of her candles. She stood alone in the darkness, her only source of light emanating from her magical brew. With the unnatural wind howling outside, swaying trees cast eerie shadows upon the walls, yet her gaze remained fixed upon the silver liquid while the whirlpool ceased and the water stilled.
“By the Sun and the Moon, have I been gifted a boon?”
She placed her front hooves upon the rim and leaned further forward into the light. Her eye shined while she suppressed a gasp.
She stood—accompanied by six foals—before a rocky outcrop at the base of an immense stone stairway. As the seven approached, the boulders blocking their path rolled up together of their own accord. They formed an archway, revealing a long tunnel with a faint blue light pulsing in its depths. Together, the seven crossed the threshold and headed down the tunnel.
A unicorn filly with a silver coat and a flowing peach mane led the party. Long eyelashes complimented her pale green eyes, beneath a horn lit with an identical hue.
A taller Earth pony—almost a stallion—tailed her. This one sported a blonde mane that stopped short of grazing his light-brown shoulders.
He was followed by yet another unicorn filly. The smallest of the group, she trotted at the taller one’s side. Her purple mane seemed to meld into her dark-brown coat.
Two pegasus colts—different as snow from fire—followed the filly while playfully shoving each other back and forth. The first had a pure white coat, though everything else about him was the palest of pinks. His partner was the exact opposite—a blood-orange coat clashed against his striped black-and-grey mane and tail.
Bringing up the rear was—
Zecora blinked and shook her head. She stared at the image again.
“Curious indeed, what my brew of destiny shows. I can only hope the queen herself does not yet know.”
The image and the glow faded. Her candles flickered to life. The walls no longer played host to cantering shadows. Her cauldron’s contents turned as dark as the discarded Neverbloom head at her hooves. For a long time, Zecora stood in silence, head bowed. Finally she sighed and sat on the leafy floor.
“The secret six, the reborn chosen… could they revive this world that’s frozen?”
* * * * *
The power of friendship will not save you, Princess.
She shifted in her bed. Her rear legs twitched.
You left them at my mercy. You left them for me to play with.
She groaned, her eyelids rapidly fluttering but remaining closed.
You will never see your friends again. Nothing remains of them but ashes now.
“No, stop…”
You killed your friends. You’re killing them all. Now it’s your turn.
She kicked the cover off herself and connected with something bony. Unconscious to the shifting body next to her, she continued to squirm, mouth moving in silence.
Greet your death, Princess Twilight.
A laughing, masked shadow swung its mighty scythe toward her face—
With a loud gasp, Twilight Sparkle sat bolt upright in her bed. Her eyes could have contained the Moon. She panted, short and shallow, while she gazed about the room. Her mouth hung open, drier than the San Palomino desert. Cold sweat coated her body. Her mane hung limp and matted in a mess that would have had Rarity fainting with shock.
Rarity, with half of her head missing, whom nothing remained of but ashes and nightmares—
“No!”
Twilight covered her eyes and inhaled deep lungfuls of air, then breathed out through her mouth. After a minute of sitting still as a statue, she felt her thundering heart begin to slow. Each consecutive thump pounded softer. With a final inhale and expulsion, she turned to look at the figure next to her.
His fur had faded with the years; it now resembled her morning’s sunrise rather than the oranges that used to grow in the orchard over from Sweet Apple Acres. His wings had lost many feathers, while most that remained were permanently bent out of shape. His mane, though still a vivid electric-blue, was flecked with streaks and spots of light grey.
Twilight looked further down to his leg, which was already beginning to bruise. Stupid Twilight. Are you determined to kill everypony you love? With a quiet, considerate sigh, Twilight lit her horn. Magic tinkling filled the room as her red aura bathed the ageing stallion’s leg and erased the blemish from his lightly wrinkled fur.
“Mhmm? Twi… light?” He stirred from her magic’s caress. His eyelids lifted and fell a few times before remaining open, after which he squinted at her in the pre-dawn gloom. Seeing her horn alight, he raised them fully and held them open. “What is it, love?”
“I hurt you in my sleep again. I’m so sorry. I’m going to shatter your pelvis or something, one of these days.”
The stallion chuckled. “Don’t you worry about little old me, dearest. I’m just a broken, useless pegasus who can’t even fly. You’ll find another to replace me in due time.”
“Flash, don’t talk like that. I love you. I could never love another.” Twilight lowered her head and planted a light kiss upon his forehead. She felt her lips fill in a portion of all five creases in his brow before she pulled away and ran a hoof through his mane.
“Twilight, don’t be silly. My time draws ever closer—we both know this.” Flash let out another trio of coughs. “You, on the other hoof, have all the time in the world. I will leave, you will mourn, you will cry… ultimately, you will move on. That’s just how it is.”
“Flash…”
Twilight’s eyes flashed briefly with a scarlet tinge before returning to their regular lilac. “It’s not too late. I can find a way to prolong your life. I… I can keep working on the age spell. I know I can eliminate its temporary reset. The theory just requires more tweaking—”
“Shhhh.” Flash brought a hoof to Twilight’s mouth, which drew her eyes to meet in the middle. “You may be powerful, Twi, but even you can’t halt my decay forever.” Another coughing fit racked his body. “I just want you to be happy with your life. You have it all already. Count your blessings.”
“I will find a way to stop Death from claiming you.”
“Nopony denies Death of his prey, my love. We are bound for either Tartarus or Elysium. Only you can defy Death now.”
Flash yawned, his jaw stretching toward the mattress as far as it could. “I’m glad to have lived at your side as long as I have. That said—” He rose and placed his forelegs around Twilight’s shoulders “—I’m not quite ready to kick the bucket yet. I’ll still be around for a while, you can be sure of that.”
Twilight closed her eyes and leaned into Flash’s embrace.
The years pass and you age, my consort. Yet I linger on as if it were still that day, and I still the same pony who made that horrific judgement call.
He clasped her tighter. She delighted in the warm breath that tickled her neck. She ran her own hoof up and down the length of his back. It grazed back and forth over a bald patch the size of a bit, the smooth spot a strange feeling compared to the usual prickle of his short coat. She felt him tense up with every stroke.
Twilight ceased and leaned back. “It’s getting larger, isn’t it?”
Flash nodded. “Yeah. I’m losing fur faster than Tibbles ever did.”
“Well, that at least I can do something about.”
Twilight’s bloody aura painted the room. She lowered her head once more toward the problem patch—
“Don’t, Twilight.”
Flash held up a wing and pressed against her horn. “You can’t preserve my stunning good looks forever. Just let it happen.”
“But I can fix it—”
“I’m not broken, Twilight. I’m simply getting old. You have to learn to see the difference. Age isn’t something you can fix. It’s a natural occurrence. I know I’m going to look far from my best if I hit seventy. But you are beautiful enough for the both of us, I think.”
Flash slipped a wink her way and leaned forward, placing a kiss on her left cheek. “My beautiful Twi, ever shall you be.”
Twilight’s cheeks turned pink. “Only because you make me feel that way.” She closed her eyes and leaned forward to meet Flash’s mouth with hers—
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
Twilight and Flash jumped and opened their eyes mere centimetres from each other. Following a bout of her giggles and his chuckling, Twilight sighed and flapped her wings. She left the bed and trotted over to her balcony doors, levitating the displaced blanket back onto the bed as she did so. The doors glowed red and opened outward; a chill welcomed her, eliciting a quick shiver before she adjusted to the temperature change.
She closed her eyes and concentrated. The Moon slid below the horizon without effort. As the Sun replaced its vigilant nightguard, its golden glow broke the shadows of early daybreak, signalling her little ponies to awaken.
Twilight kept her eyes closed while the Sun climbed. Try as she might, she could never bear to actually watch one. Her abilities certainly did the job well enough, but there was something… missing from her sunrises. Something she never did learn how to replicate.
Celestia’s was always more beautiful than mine will ever be.
She heard the shuffle of dragging hooves, felt the vibration in the floor. She pretended not to notice Flash making his way onto the balcony, pretended to be surprised when she felt his hoof upon her right shoulder.
“Another beautiful day, my love.”
He sidled up next to her and stared out over the balcony. He yawned and stretched his wings out to the nippy air. “Mornings like these make me feel alive.”
“As much as I desire your endless praises, my love,” Twilight said, “I still have a country to run. I am a slave of time, and it never waits.”
Flash leaned into Twilight and rested his head against her neck. “You are Equestria’s rise and fall, its wax and wane, bringer of life, light, death and darkness. Without you, none of us would survive.” He kicked the floor, a loud clop reaching their ears. “I wish I could do something, anything more for you.”
“Silly stallion. You do more than enough for me already.” Twilight draped her wing around Flash and pulled him closer. “To have your love and support in this world that resents me is… is more than I ever hoped for.” She twined her right foreleg around his left and leaned against him. Not too heavily, though. Don’t want to push him over.
“Speaking of hope,” Flash said, “how is Sweetie?”
Twilight sighed. “Her abilities are almost on par with how mine used to be, before my ascension. It’s too bad that there’s no other unicorn anywhere near her league. Even her own daughter shows a significant lack of genetic talent retention.”
She pushed her head down into Flash’s mane. “Sweetie Belle sticks with her closest friends—she still won’t go out to see anypony else. As one of the few still blessed with magic, she’s often hounded by citizens, asking her to fix this or help them with that. She tries, but her focus on our experiments is consistently broken. It doesn’t help that beneath other ponies’ gratitude for her abilities, jealousy still runs rampant over the fact she still has magic and they don’t.”
“She’s not the only one, Twilight. You know that every foal without a cutie mark at the time kept their magic too. Maybe you could re-establish your old school and—”
Flash slammed against the thick glass doors and slid down them, the doors reverberating back and forth with steadily declining crashes. He grunted and massaged his flank, willing the pain away. When he looked up a few seconds later, his blood ran cold.
“Darling, you know I didn’t mean—”
“I would never start that up again. Imagine how their hate would intensify if I declared I was running the school that their former princess took such pride in—the princess they actually loved. I might be forced to kill some foolish ones if they dared to protest.”
Twilight fixed her consort with burning eyes, her Amulet shining a matching red. “Besides, that would invite what few remaining unicorns do have their magic to unite and rise against me. I would be compelled to stop them.”
She closed her eyes and reared back, her wings flapping to maintain her balance. When she dropped back to the balcony floor, her eyes opened, the red gone. She shook her head and looked at Flash, her eyes widening.
“Flash!”
She ran to him and wrapped him in her magic, gently pulling him back onto his hooves. “Are you all right? Did I do something to you again?”
Flash shuddered. “Oh, uh, n-no, not at all. I just, er, slipped again. Curse these ageing legs of mine. Pegasi were never meant to walk on hard surfaces for too long.”
“Flash, don’t you lie to me. One moment I had my wing draped over you, the next I was blanked out and you’re up against the balcony door. What happened?”
Flash gulped. “W-well, you took something I said a little… heavy.”
“What was it?”
Flash shook his head.
“Doesn’t matter. It was a dumb suggestion anyway. Just forget about it.” He straightened and smiled at Twilight. “Hey, let’s get some breakfast. Earl Grey and Pristine should have everything ready by now.”
Twilight’s stomach rumbled. She brought a hoof to it and giggled. “Well, if you’re sure… breakfast does sound lovely right now.” She beckoned him to her side with a wing, clasping his left in her right. Together they departed the balcony, light streaming into the royal chamber.
Flash placed a hoof on the door handle and pressed down. As the door opened, he stood back with a bow.
“Ladies first.”
Every morning, without fail, he’s remained the perfect gentlecolt. “Thank you.”
Twilight stepped through the exit ahead of Flash. When he rejoined her, she closed their door and cast a lock spell on it. “Come, My Prince,” she said in her Ruler voice. “Let us prepare for another day.”
“As you wish, My Queen.”
* * * * *
“Phew-wee! Sure is hot this mornin’. Do y’all reckon the queen forgot about that cloud cover she promised last week?”
Apple Bloom rested against her plow, electing to duck under the light amount of shade it provided. Next to her, Babs Seed pulled a plow of equal size. Although Babs was a capable and strong mare, her muscles still paled against Apple Bloom’s strength.
Babs brought her own plow to a halt next to Apple Bloom. “You said it, cuz.” She gasped, her Manehattanite drawl only slightly present after years away from her native city. “That rain ain’t come yet, either. How’re our seeds s’posed to sprout in this dry soil?” She ran a hoof through the dirt below her and watched it fall away, a similar consistency to sand.
“I hear ya, Babsie. Somepony oughta remind the queen.”
Babs shook her head vigorously. “Nuh-uh! I ain’t going to Queen Sparkle. She’d tear my head off sooner’n hear me out!”
“She won’t do that, Babs.” Apple Bloom threw up her hooves. “She needs ponies like us too much. The more of us she keeps around, the less actual work she has to do.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s just… she scares me, is all.”
“She scares us all, ladies.”
Both mares turned their heads to the third plow that pulled up next to them. A white-and-brown pinto stallion panted and regarded the pair with his soft brown eyes.
“No matter our fears, though, we’ve gotta get these veggies growing by summer. The queen’s wrath will be greater if we don’t supply enough for everypony.”
“How ’bout you go see her then, Pipsqueak?” Apple Bloom asked. “Show us what a strong and brave stallion you are. Off you go then. Pip pip.”
While Babs chortled at the quip, Pipsqueak sighed. “Can’t somepony else go to see her? Somepony who values their existence just a little less than us?”
Apple Bloom brought a hoof to her chin. “Hmmm… what about Diamond Tiara?”
“That old snob? Please.” Babs snorted and blew a lock of mane from her face. “She don’t do nothin’ but stay home and mope. Far as she’s concerned, she lost everythin’ when her magic and cutie mark were stolen. Good luck gettin’ her to do anythin’.”
“Silver Spoon, then? Or Twist?”
“No way, Pipsqueak. They’re the best cooks we have. They and the Cake twins pretty much keep all of Ponyville goin’.”
“Chip Mint? Firelock?”
“Forget it, y’all.” Babs stamped a hoof. “We can’t send any pegasi. They’re all too busy at Scoots’ training facility.” She grunted and resumed pulling her plow. “Let’s just… wait a little longer. I’m sure the queen’ll come through for us.”
Apple Bloom and Pipsqueak watched as Babs hauled her plow along. They looked at each other, eyebrows drooping slightly.
“We can’t keep this up much longer, Pip. Equestria’s dyin’—I can feel it in the ground.”
Pipsqueak trotted over to Apple Bloom and wrapped a hoof around her shoulders.
“I know. Something has to be done if we’re to survive another decade of this…” He planted a kiss on her cheek and faced her. Seeing moisture gathering at the corners of his wife’s eyes, he raised a hoof and gently wiped it away. “But what can we do, really?”
“I… I really don’t know.” Apple Bloom buried her face into Pipsqueak’s chest. “Zecora can’t even help. She’s strugglin’ to survive these days. It don’t help none her injuries keep her stuck in bed most o’the time.”
“Hey, would ya hurry it up back there? This field ain’t gonna plow itself!”
Apple Bloom and Pipsqueak turned when they heard Babs’ yell. With a final glance at each other, they broke apart and hitched themselves up to their plows again. Sweat crept down each of their faces as they resumed their relentless task.
There’s gotta be a better way to live. No way Queen Twilight would just forget us. I know she still cares. Apple Bloom cast her gaze north to the distant mountain city. I wonder how Sweetie Belle is?
“Mama!”
The high voice stopped Apple Bloom in her tracks. She unhitched herself from the plow once again and stepped around it. She looked to the south and smiled.
A small lemon-coloured filly with brown hair ran toward Apple Bloom. On top of her head, she balanced a tray with three mugs. Her orange eyes were wide as she galloped toward Apple Bloom.
“I brought you, and Daddy, and Auntie Babsie a drink. I even made it myself this time!” The filly pulled up, sliding on the dirt. “Uncle Mac said it was the best cider he’s had in ages!”
Apple Bloom gave a quiet chuckle. “Well, how ’bout I be the judge of that? Let’s see how you did this time.”
She placed a hoof through an oaken handle and lifted it to her mouth. Taking a small sip, Apple Bloom swished the liquid around in her mouth, spat it on the ground next to her, and took a larger drink. She closed her eyes for a moment, allowing the cider to tempt her taste buds.
Finally, Apple Bloom gulped down the rest. She narrowed her eyes.
“Hmmm.”
A second later, a broad grin stretched across her face. “This is delicious, Ambrosia! I can pick out the Red Delicious, Royal Gala, and Granny Smith blend you’ve got goin’. There’s a tang of cinnamon in there too, but also somethin’ I can’t pick. What’s your secret, little missy?”
“Oh, I think I’ll keep that to myself. I’m just glad you liked it.” Ambrosia beamed up at her mother, who drained her mug and gasped a contented sigh. She giggled, careful to maintain her balance of the tray upon her head.
“Course you will,” Apple Bloom said. “Well, you keep doing whatever it is you have been, then. Now go and wow your father and Auntie Babsie. They’re sure to get a kick out of it, especially in this heat.”
“Okay!”
Ambrosia galloped off toward Pipsqueak with her two remaining mugs. Apple Bloom watched her energetic daughter, a fleeting smile accompanying the warmth spreading inside her. “And don’t be late for school!” she added.
Oh, my darling. You deserve a better world than this one. Perhaps we’ll find a way to make it so.
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Pro tip: Submit the story.
4780858
Wow, you beat me to it by 10 mins. Timing: what is it?
Yaaay it's out!
4781431
Sorry it took so long.
Hurray, it's here!
I question where Celestia, Luna, and Cadence are. Are they still in Tartarus, twiddling their thumbs(hooves?) Also, why is Discord dead? I remember how in the last story, Tirek tied him into knots, but that shouldn't be enough to kill him, considering that he tore out his own eyes and was fine.
Also, somehow I doubt that Diamond Tiara, the queen of arrogance and sadism, would simply roll over and mope. She's too full of hatred to do that.
It probably sounds like I hate the story...I don't. I just love nit picking a lot. Let me get to the good part
OMG, THE SEQUEL IS OUT, I AM EXCITED!
Holy buttloads of prereaders. I didn't know their were that many. We have, like, no excuse for letting errors through.
Also, it's out! I am excite.
4781491 he did not have his chaos magic i would presume.
Good start, looking forward to how it develops.
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4781491
What LoM said. He was strangled.
Also, the princesses will be explained. In due time of course
Sorry! I fell asleep! There, I blogged for ya
Hurray! I missed the release, but hurray!
Fuck all kinds of yes
4780899
lovin dis shit keep it coming and you will have loads of followers
It has good detail and the charters role fitted into them and it also has a good plot one that can keep pepole reading i see this as a really good planed out but i cant give you a full review until you fished it but i'll be looking forward to see more.I'm putting this on my read later list.
respect homie
Ultimate uprising?
HRH Twilight better keep an eye out for Mister Rogers pony...
Hello popular box.
You hear that? It is the sound of inevitable revolution!
Hello FEATURE BOX!!!
*Tips hat* It is an honour to be acquainted with you good sir. 
You have just risen to alicorn status.
Congrulations. 
Off to a great start here! More please!
4782612
i2.photobucket.com/albums/y36/ShyRangerSMRPG/omigosh.png
Ok , got around to reading this now. Have to say like the transition to the future time seeing how the ponies are living in this time.
I'm still concerned a bit about Twilight's massive change. Turning into a dictator I could understand, but one who just kills when they don't agree seems a bit too much. I understand however it could be since it was such a powerful drive against tirek that it stayed permanently on her due to the amulet.
Await more of this story to see where it goes
Excellent first chapter. I feel very safe favoriting this now.
The scene with Twilight and Flash was just the perfect mix of horrifying and intriguing. Well done there, in particular.
And now the wait begins for me to see how long it takes someone to notice the stealthy ninja-edit I just made
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Thank you for all of your support, guys. Kudos to my editors.
4782514
Great song.
Well, this was a pleasant surprise. Congrats on the feature as well. Now, let the rebellion begin!
So... Implying she wouldn't instantly delete them within a second of confrontation?
4783815
Stick around to find out, if you wish.
But I am sticking around!
...
Later, got too many things to read
4783883 I know the feel.
Take your time. The revolution has only just begun, after all.
Wow, using a Twi emote to smile on this fic is... Creepy.
Oh look. Feature timez. Congrats.
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I have no idea what you are talking about. XD
Hmmm... I'm not sure if Flash is sweet, for staying with a pained ruler, or scared, for staying in an abusive relationship with a mentally unstable tyrant.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions...
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Come to think of it, I'm rather surprised that Twilight appears to be respecting Flash's will vis-a-vis his looks and lifespan. Doing what you want with others regardless of their wishes is the essence of tyranny, after all. I suspect if he continues not wanting to be her eternal consort, she'll make him, whether he likes it or not.
4786147
Our Twily is deeper than she appears. Of that, you can be sure.
4786164
I suppose you know best. Still, I can't help but think in his position I'd be plotting to run for the hills before the crazy alicorn decides that my animated corpse is an acceptable substitute.
Then again, my most prominent Dark-tagged story involves the utter destruction of Equestria at the hands of merciless alien invaders, so maybe I'm just prone to thinking in various shades of black.
I'd avoid saying almost. When you're writing about emotions—or descriptors, in this case—there are so many choices that convey so many subtle shades of meaning that saying "almost sad" or "almost angry" is really a poor choice. Saying "he was almost a lawyer" or "almost a chef", is again, a poor choice. Something like, "almost finished" is fine.
4786206
Well, by saying "almost a stallion" I'm trying to tell that he's an older colt, yet not quite full grown. Is there an equine term for that? I'll gladly use it.
4786211
There is no such thing, unfortunately. After they turn four, they're considered a mare or a stallion.
4786220
Hence my use of "almost a stallion" then.
As for the other suggestions you made, I already know all of those.
If you ever see me use almost in a way like that, don't hesitate to send me a virtual slap
In the Equestrian vocabulary, "foolish" becomes "foalish." Much how "everyone" becomes "everypony."
4786633
*commences internal debate on whether or not to apply*
4786644
I'd say you should. In the second episode of season one, when the Mayor yells out, "Seize her! Only she knows where the princess is!" And then Nightmare Moon yelled, "Stand back you foals!"
That clearly was supposed to be "fools", but in the show, it came out as "foals." So therefore, "foolish" would be "foalish."
But this is just a suggestion. Your way works as well.
Great Start ! Can't Wait to see more
4786739
Generally speaking, the show doesn't adhere too much to their ponified words. Not to mention that "foalish," of all the coloquialisms, makes the least sense. It should mean something around childish, but it is used variably, which is fairly odd.
Either way, I see it more as a personal thing anyway. I don't use any of the ponified words, and if I do, it is rare.
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I'm more inclined to believe that Nightmare Moon was comparing the guards to children as an insult.
It would make sense, considering she's older and more powerful than they are.
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Geez man, calm down. I was only making a suggestion. I honestly doubt I've offended the author by saying this.
4787073
So you never say "eveypony/somepony/nopony" when ponies talk in your stories? Hmm, still, you've made some good points.