Dexter's Lab: Equestria

by RenegadeAlias

Walking Nightmare

-A/N-
Hey guys, I know it's been a long wait. Apologies, this ugly thing called life decided to get in my way.
Edit: Sorry if you got an errant notification, I accidentally hit the unpublished button while trying to edit out a few typos.

A thank you for the proof readers / Editors: Crescent Quill, SingABrightSong, Thardoc, Mac349, EverfreeSparkle, Mrlava, Aaronpony1, Procket12, Fire1Shy, Aerigim, Eckaji.

Something Important: Dexter's trip to the past is going to be a separate (shorter) story that I will upload to fimfic before releasing the next chapter of this story. I am doing this instead of releasing the trip as another chapter because his trip to the past will touch on darker themes which clash with the comedy of this fic. Everyone who responded to the blog post (almost literally, everyone) wanted Dexter's trip to the past to be darker. It's not going to be super dark, but you're still getting your wish.

You won't have to read it in order to continue with this story, but you will be missing out.

Again, enjoy and leave a comment! (Seriously, leave a comment, or two, or three. Even if you stop in the middle of the chapter.) Leaving a comment might not be as good as tipping your author, but it's the next best thing! :)

---

“Thank goodness, it’s about time!” Spike whined, dragging his tiny hands down his face as he took in the morning sky.

Twilight rolled her eyes before glancing back at the small dragon. “Our visit to the school only took thirty minutes, Spike.”

“Yeah, I know. It just feels like it’s been—” Spike began counting claws on his hand, “—six months or something…”

The unicorn merely shook her head, suppressing a chuckle at the dragon’s expense. After all, there were far more important matters to attend to. Twilight had a burning curiosity to know what the princess thought of Dexter after seeing him for herself.

Twilight looked up at the diarch to find Luna deep in thought, maintaining a brisk pace. It wasn’t until the third time that Twilight spoke Luna’s name that the blue alicorn was pulled out of her thoughts.

“Apologies, Twilight.” Luna replied. “What didst thou say?”

“I was wondering what you thought of Dexter, now that you’ve seen him.” Twilight tried to restrain the hope in her voice. “Especially considering what I told you about him and his little ‘prank’ yesterday.”

Luna turned to check the empty road, satisfied to find that they were alone. “He is certainly not the typical eight year old colt.”

“And now I, too, harbor suspicion of this ‘Dexter.’” Luna declared. “He may, in fact, be the colt we were looking for. You were right to suspect him.”

Twilight had to restrain herself from letting out a cheer.

“However, I retain a number of lingering doubts,” Luna continued, causing Twilight’s triumphant grin to falter. “I still find it hard to believe that a mere child is capable of doing the things you suspect him of doing. At the very least, I was expecting this colt to be a unicorn foal with a cutie mark for magic. But alas, this is not the case.”

“Princess, none of this started happening until he showed up!” Twilight answered. “And the sheer number of ‘coincidences’ surrounding him cannot be ignored, and they can all be explained by his involvement.”

“Twilight, I know you have strong convictions about your suspicions, but try to understand how extraordinary they are.” Luna began to pace around the mare. “You would have me believe that a mere child took on several changelings, besting them; on top of overcoming my own anti-teleportation magic, as well as obtaining a number of extraordinary pieces of technology and sophisticated weaponry…"

“If a full grown unicorn mage were to boast such feats, I wouldn’t believe it.” Luna shook her head. “ Let alone a child.”

“Princess, if I may,” Spike cut in, waving his clawed hand to catch her attention. “I saw a foal fighting the changelings at the bakery. And you said you saw a colt steal Twilight’s diagrams. So we already know for certain that a colt, a mere child, is the one behind a lot of things, despite how extraordinary it may sound.”

“And Dexter is the best suspect!” Twilight added. “His mane and coat color match what both you and Spike saw. Spike even thinks the voice of the colt in the bakery was the same as Dexter’s!”

“Yet, I saw somepony teleport the cannon out from underneath my magic-blocking spells, and deposit it a great distance away, deep within the Everfree Forest.” Luna replied. “A feat that a child simply cannot do, no matter his skill with magic. Which means he is either not a child or must have had help.

“I do share your suspicions Twilight Sparkle, which is precisely why I will investigate Dexter,” Luna declared before checking the road once more. “Come, let us continue onward. We wish to get back to the barracks as soon as possible. If the changelings are to attempt a rescue of their captured kin, they would make their attempt in our absence .”

Twilight nodded, following Luna while matching her brisk pace.

“I only reserve doubt because I feel we have much more to discover, and that the truth may not be what it seems.” Luna continued speaking. “Had we reacted to your suspicions sooner, when you sent the original letter concerning the colt, we may have more answers now. However, investigating the colt was secondary at the time, and I do believe my sister’s decision to avoid investigating the colt was the correct one given what we knew.”

“Secondary?” Twilight tilted her head in surprise. “What could be more important?”

“The changelings,” said Luna. “The device in the Ponyville clinic informed us of their presence, yet it left us wondering why they are here and how many of them there are.”

“Given the threat the changelings pose, investigating their intentions takes priority,” Luna declared with a stomp. “They could be planning another invasion, and if that is the case then I have to do whatever I can to prevent it.”

Princess Luna still harbored a sense of frustration toward herself after the changeling attack on Canterlot. She had failed to come to the defense of Canterlot , her subjects, and even her older sister.

Of course no one blamed the younger alicorn, but that didn’t stop Luna from feeling shameful nonetheless. It was another reason she felt unworthy of being a princess. Luna promised herself to be more vigilant and wasn’t about to let anything like it happen again.

“The changelings have been ahead of us at every turn.” Luna admitted, a trace of frustration seeping into her tone. “And I have the feeling that there is a lot more going on than we realize.”

“What did the changelings captured from the bakery say?” Twilight asked.

“Very little, I’m afraid.” The princess grimaced in thought. “They’ve been aggravatingly silent, saying less than four words since we caught them.”

“You’re not able to bribe them or something?” Spike asked.

“No, and much to my displeasure, Sister will not”—Luna’s voice shifted to an ominous tone, one which sounded similar to Nightmare Moon—“permit me to ‘impress’ upon the changelings the virtues of answering my questions. Sister still believes a diplomatic outcome is possible, and that interrogating our prisoners would diminish our position at the bargaining table.”

Silence reigned for a few moments as the group continued walking, the density of homes and shops now growing.

“Princess, if you wish, I can investigate Dexter more thoroughly,” Twilight offered. “It would allow you to focus on the changelings, and it would mean that you wouldn’t have to leave the barracks as often.”

“And let thee hoard all the fun?” Luna chided, glancing toward the unicorn. “Nay, we shall learn everything we need to know about this colt tonight. We shall question him in the dreamscape.”

“Why wait until tonight?” Twilight asked. “Why not just question him now?”

“Questioning him in his dreams will allow me to glean all I can without drawing the attention of the changelings,” Luna reasoned. “No pony will be able to tell that I have approached this colt if I do so in his dreams.”

“Uh, Princess,” Spike spoke up. “Is drawing the attention of the changelings really that big of an issue? I mean, if Dexter is the pony we saw at the bakery, than he can more than defend himself from the changelings. So wouldn’t it be better to ask him now?”

“And what if he isn’t?” Luna responded. “If he isn’t the same colt, drawing the changeling’s attention to an innocent child would be irresponsible. However, the changelings aren’t the only reason. He could be dangerous.”

“When the cannon device we recovered from the bakery exploded, it wiped out a sizable chunk of land in the Everfree. It was easily powerful enough to cause significant harm to Ponyville,” Luna explained. “The little ‘prank’ he pulled on you yesterday told us one thing: If Dexter is in fact the colt from the bakery, he may be hostile toward us and unwilling to come quietly.”

“Do you… think he poses a threat to you personally, Princess?” Twilight asked hesitantly, slightly frightened at the prospect of Dexter attacking Ponyville.

“No, I do not think he could hurt me. But I do not wish for my subjects to be endangered,” Luna explained. “If I confront this colt in the dreamscape, and your suspicions are correct, I will be able to hold him there, asleep, long enough for you and the guard to secure him.”

“You can do that?” Spike asked with a hint of surprise. “Hold ponies asleep in their dreams, I mean?”

“Yes, it is required for my duties in the dreamscape,” Luna admitted. “Ponies have the tendency to wake up at times when they realize they are dreaming.”

“What do you need me to do, Your Highness?” Twilight asked.

“If you see Applejack or her brother this day, find out when they put the foals to bed,” Luna ordered. “But see to it that you don’t tell them anything of your suspicions nor of our investigations; we do not wish to provide Dexter any warning nor give the changelings a reason to focus on the colt.”

---

“Fer a smart pony, Dex, ya sure can be pretty dumb sometimes,” Applebloom taunted as she and her fellow crusaders followed Dexter out the school door.

Of course, the other foals in Cheerilee’s class found his outburst against the princess hysterical. They didn’t believe the colt’s accusations to be genuine, given that he was largely considered a nerd. Why else would the insufferable know-it-all contradict common knowledge, straight to the princess’ face, if not to be a clown?

However, Miss Cheerilee was not amused, and that meant Dexter was in trouble. Accusing the princess of lying was grounds for an automatic time out, which he spent standing in the corner.

But his punishment didn’t end there. He was given a note he had to bring back to Applejack, as well as an extra homework assignment due the next day: Research the history of Princess Luna.

It meant another trip to the library, something he wasn’t looking forward to for the first time in his life.

“Yeah, Dexter,” Scootaloo added, smirking. “How can you be a nerd and not know something as basic as the princesses raising the Sun and the Moon.”

“Simple. Because they don’t,” Dexter spoke candidly, frowning in anticipation of their retorts. However, the fillies just stifled their snickering. “I don’t know what causes the sun to move the way it does, but I’m pretty sure it isn’t a pony.”

“And what makes you so sure you’re right?” Sweetie Belle challenged.

“Because, if you converted every last atom inside the princess’ body into pure kinetic energy, it would not be enough to move a celestial body a single micrometer,” the nerd explained, his tone growing indignant. “Heck, energy itself warps space-time just as much as matter does. If she had enough energy to move a celestial object packed into her little body then the princess would have a noticeable gravitational field.”

The fillies collectively tilted their heads in confusion. Dexter pressed a hoof to his forehead before letting out a forlorn sigh, the strange looks he earned from the fillies making him feel like he was speaking a foreign language.

Sweetie Belle opened her mouth to say something but was stopped when Dexter raised a hoof. “No, no, don’t ask. I doubt you would understand.” Dexter shifted his gaze toward Applebloom. “Tell Applejack that I am going to the library. Cheerilee gave me an extra homework assignment due tomorrow, and I need to reference a few books.”

“We’ll come with you!” Sweetie Belle answered before Dexter could turn away.

“Uhh, why?”

“I want a dictionary,” the white filly replied, earning nods of agreement from the other two fillies.

The fillies continued to poke fun at the colt all the way to the library. After a few short minutes of walking they finally reached the library door.

“Hey Dexter, if you’re so smart, answer this.” Scootaloo posed another question for the tenth time. “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?”

“Neither, they both co-evolved into existence at the same time. Just like every egg laying species that came before it.” Dexter droned while rolling his eyes before raising a hoof to rap the door. “Now stop asking me infantile questions!”

The library door promptly swung open to reveal a purple dragon standing at eye level with the colt. Spike immediately folded his arms, frowning at the sight of the colt.

“What do you want?” The dragon asked, his tone more of a complaint than a question.

“I need to use the library,” Dexter replied candidly, ignoring Spike’s stink-eye.

“And why should I let you?”

Dexter frowned. “Other than the fact this is a public library in which you’re obligated to grant me access? After Princess Luna’s little visit to the school this morning, Miss Cheerilee gave me an extra assignment as punishment for ‘being disrespectful’ to her.”

“Who knew healthy and pragmatic skepticism was ‘disrespectful…’”

“Serves you right.” Spike grinned.

“Of course,” Dexter began, taking a moment to inspect his fore hoof, “if you don’t let me in, I can’t do the assignment. I’m sure Miss Cheerilee would understand and let me out of my punishment.”

Spike eyed the colt for a moment longer before slowly stepping aside. “I’m watching you,” Spike mumbled as the colt passed him. The fillies followed soon after.

“Thank you,” Dexter replied curtly, turning to the bookshelves. However, he stopped upon noticing a pair of guards flanking the library’s entrance.

They were a pair of blue unicorns in dark blue armor, doing their best to imitate expressionless statues.

“What’s with the guards?” Dexter asked out of surprise, glancing back at Spike.

“The princess came through here and left them there.” Spike shrugged. “You know, investigating the changeling problem and everything. It’d be kind of nice if you’d help out with that, you know?”

“Yes, yes, yes, it would be nice if I could assist in any manner,” Dexter dismissed as he approached the book shelves. “But since I know nothing, it doesn’t really matter. Now I have homework to do, so please keep it down.”

Spike’s stink eye returned.

“Don’t take it personally, Spike.” Applebloom rolled her eyes at Dexter, following him further into the library with the other fillies. “He takes his homework waaayyy too seriously.”

“Yah, Dex.” Scootaloo bounced over to the colt, poking her head into a book he had just opened. “Why so serious?”

“I don’t take homework too seriously,” The colt retorted, pulling away from the filly. “You just don’t take homework seriously enough. Homework is serious business.”

“Egghead…” Scootaloo rolled her eyes.

“I’m going to go find that dictionary!” Sweetie Belle declared excitedly, darting to the far side of the library.

“Oh, I’ll help.” Scootaloo chased, leaving Dexter to return to his book. “Maybe I wasn’t totally wrong about that definition, despite what Applejack said. ”

There was a moment of silence as Spike continued to eye the colt, eventually glancing at Applebloom. The filly replied with a curious glance.

“Of course, the guards wouldn’t be necessary if Dexter would help catch the changelings.” Spike accused. “You know, before they foalnapped anypony else.”

Dexter merely ignored him, turning a page in the book before him.

“What’s he talking about, Dex?” Applebloom asked in confusion looking back toward the colt. However, Dexter was fully immersed in his book, either not hearing the filly or doing an impeccable job at pretending he didn’t.

“Dex?” The filly approached the colt, nudging him with a hoof.

“What?” Dexter looked up at the filly, fighting the urge to frown. “I’m sorry, Applebloom. I was reading.”

“What’s Spike talking about?” the filly repeated. “About you being able to help catch changelings?”

“He’s babbling nonsense, I assure you .” Dexter scoffed. “Try not to pay attention to him.”

Spike growled. “It’s not nonsense! You’re lying to everypony!”

“Wait, what?” Scootaloo asked, as she and Sweetie Belle redirected their attention to the baby dragon. “What’s going on?”

“Spike seems to think, erroneously mind you, that I had something to do with fighting the changelings or something like that.” Dexter shrugged, attempting to put off Spike’s accusations by feigning mild confusion. “I have no idea what he’s talking about.”

“Dexter is the colt I saw fighting the changelings at the Sugar Cube Corner! He beat them up and saved everypony!” Spike pointed an accusatory claw at the colt, glancing at the fillies. “He’s also the one that told the princess how Cheerilee was replaced by a changeling! He’s some sort of super smart, changeling fighting colt!”

The three fillies glanced at the colt. Dexter merely shrugged once more. “I have no clue what he is talking about.” He turned back toward Spike. “Spike, this is ridiculous; I didn’t fight the changelings, and I didn’t do any of that other stuff.”

“Dexter, I saw you.” Spike countered.

“Spike, you’re not remembering things correctly.” Dexter argued. “And that’s probably thanks to Miss Sparkle’s errant beliefs. I don’t understand, you believed me before, what changed?”

“I believed you before because I didn’t think you’d lie to me.” Spike answered. “I thought that if you were fighting the changelings, that’d mean we were on the same side; that you’d have no reason to lie.”

“I’m not lying.” Lied the liar.

“I dunno Spike…” Applebloom began, looking between the dragon and the colt. “Dexter doesn’t seem like the type to take on changelings and beat em’ up.”

“Yeah,” Scootaloo added. “He’s a total egghead, a nerd, and not like Twilight, he’s a wimpy nerd.”

“Huh?” Dexter recoiled. He was genuinely miffed at Scootaloo’s declaration, his ego felt like it had been stabbed through the heart.

“No, seriously girls!” Spike tried to counter. “I don’t know what lies he’s told you but I saw him!”

“Uhh, no offense Spike, but Scootaloo is right.” Sweetie Belle replied, motioning to herself and the other girls. “How can he beat up changelings if he isn’t strong enough to beat the three of us?”

“Yeah Spike. We wrassled him the other day inta playing dress-up with us. He didn’t really want ta help us, but Rarity said we needed ta use a colt if we ever hoped ta get a cutie mark in fashion design.” Applebloom explained. “We asked Dexter, but he was still act’n all weird.”

“So we uh… persuaded him to come with us.” Sweetie Belle added.

“Huh?” Spike scratched his head. “Dude, you got beat up by a bunch of little girls?”

“We didn’t beat him up…” Sweetie explained ever so sweetly. “We just… ‘convinced’ him to stop acting weird and play along…”

“It’s… true...” Dexter admitted through gritted teeth, trying to stop the painful demise of his dignity. “But I didn’t get beat up. I merely stopped struggling because I did not wish to hurt the psychotically obsessive prepubescent females through forceful resistance.”

…

“Yup, he’s a nerd.” Thanks Applebloom.

“Pffft,” Scootaloo scoffed, waving a hoof. “Stopped resisting? You struggled like your life depended on it, and only stopped after we pinned you and dragged you to the club house.”

Spike scratched his head. “You… you sure it wasn’t some sort of trick? I mean… he is pretty strong. I guess.”

“I can prove it.” Sweetie Belle declared, looking into her saddlebags. “Rarity asked me to take pictures, so she could help judge our fashion designs, and maybe help us get a cutie mark. I managed to take some while Dexter wasn’t looking.”

“Pictures!?” Dexter exclaimed, barely managed to stop himself from shouting.

“Yeah,” Sweetie nodded. “Though Rarity took most of them… she said she wanted them as ‘persuasion currency,’ whatever that means. But I still have a few. Here, take a look!”

She shortly produced two photos from her saddlebags, the mere sight of them horrified Dexter. The first photo was of Dexter struggling in Scootaloo’s grasp as Applebloom tried to apply lipstick to the thrashing colt. It was smeared all over his face. His hooves were also neon pink, and a yellow dress had already been fastened around his waist.

The second photo was of a defeated Dexter, who had resigned to his fate and was sitting calmly as Applebloom and Scootaloo surrounded him. This time, his dress was pink, matching a pink bow attached to his head. Scootaloo was facing the camera with a set of eyelash curlers in her hooves, apparently asking Sweetie how they worked. Applebloom was busy turning his mane into a ponytail.

Spike merely stared at the photographs silently, taking them into his hand. For half a minute he said nothing, before bursting into uncontrollable laughter.

“Hey, that! Grrrrr…” Dexter protested, reaching for the pictures. “Give them to me!”

Spike merely laughed harder, pulling away from the colt to prevent him from snatching them.

“Hand them over, you oversized lizard!” Dexter bent his knees before pouncing on the baby dragon.

The two boys wrestled, struggling as they occasionally bumped into walls and knocked over furniture. Spike’s unrelenting gaffing could he heard the whole time.

When the grappling pair knocked over a bookshelf, one of the guards stepped forward. “You two, cut it out.” He ordered, loud enough freeze them.

However , Spike’s laughter was only starting to die down. “You know what Dexter…” Spike panted, finally managing a few words as he pushed the colt away. “Maybe you’re right. You’re way too much of a wimp to do anything.”

Dexter merely growled under his breath.

“I am not a wimp.” Dexter seethed through his teeth.

“Really? Prove it…” Spike baited, grinning as he waved the pictures in front of the colt. “Show me how tough you are, just like you showed those changelings…”

It was a tempting offer as far as the colt was concerned. He could always summon one of his mechs to crush the baby dragon; or at the very least let the gloves come off and pound Spike into a pulp.

Of course the latter would reveal that the colt knew how to fight much better than he ever let on; and the former would raise a lot of questions.

And something told the colt that was exactly what Spike wanted.

“Such barbarism is beneath me.” Dexter declared, snatching the photos from Spike’s grasp and stuffing them into his saddlebags. “Nice try though, but I’ll gladly show you how tough I am when there are less witnesses around…”

“What’s going on down there?” Twilight called from somewhere above, having heard the bookshelf fall.

“Uhhh…” Spike quickly turned to survey the fallen bookshelf. He didn’t get to say another word before Twilight appeared in a purple flash.

Along with a dark blue alicorn.

“What happened?” Twilight asked with a frown as she surveyed the toppled furniture. However, she learned the answer to that question the moment she spotted the cutie mark crusaders playing innocent, alongside Spike and Dexter.

“Dexter…” Twilight answered herself.

“We uhh…” Spike glanced at the fallen bookcase. “We were roughhousing, sorry.” He turned toward Luna before bowing. “Princess.” He acknowledged.

“Whelp, explain thy presence here.” Luna ordered, being genuinely surprised to find the colt at the library.

“Uhh… Miss Cheerilee gave me a paper assignment,” Dexter began to explain, glancing at Twilight as the unicorn used her magic to right the toppled bookshelf and the other furniture, books caught in aura arranged themselves back into their proper places. “And I require a few books for reference.”

“It’s because he got in trouble for being rude to you,” Spike added with a smile. “Now he’s got to do a history paper on you, Princess Celestia, and Nightmare Moon.”

“And we’re here to get a dictionary!” One of the Crusaders piped up, earning Twilight’s gaze. “But we can’t seem to find any…”

“I afraid we’re fresh out of dictionaries, girls.” Twilight replied with a wave. “Rarity checked out every last one I had before moving back into the boutique.”

“What?” Sweetie Belle protested. “Oh C’mon!” She turned to the other crusaders. “Let’s go get em, Crusaders!”

The fillies were fast when they wanted to be, disappearing from the library in a moment.

“Thou must report upon us?” Luna addressed Dexter with a raised eyebrow. “Well, if your beliefs from this morning remain unchanged whelp, then you will likely fail your assignment.”

“Don’t worry, princess.” Dexter assured before rolling his eyes. “I know how to write a paper to get an ‘A,’ even if what I am writing is not exactly accurate.”

“And stop calling me whelp! I am neither a carnivorous neonate nor a juvenile canine.” Dexter countered. He was a self-respecting omnivore after all.

…

“What?” Spike shook his head as he turned a palm upward.

“Stop calling me ‘whelp,’ I’m not a puppy!”

Luna chuckled into her hoof before bringing her head to eye level with the colt, meeting his grimace with a playful grin. “We will call thee what we wish.”

Dexter merely sat back on his haunches before folding his forelegs. Of course Luna found the sight of miffed colt extremely amusing. She had to admit, she was curious about the strange little foal. He had one of the weirdest accents she had ever heard, and acted far too intelligently for a child his age.

At least in some respects; because he seemed downright dumb in others . He seemed almost paranoid in his perception of Princess Luna, despite claiming to not hold her accountable for the acts of Nightmare Moon.

It was odd to say the least, but that didn’t stop Luna from deciding she would have fun toying with him.

“I am fond of you whelp, you are amusing.” Luna resumed her full height, standing over the colt. “But tell me, if you do not hold the actions of Nightmare Moon against me, then what have I done to earn your contempt?”

“You, or at least your underlings, make exaggerated claims about you.” Dexter glanced at Twilight. “Particularly the claim that you have can move celestial objects.”

“And if the claims are not exaggerated? If they are, in fact, true?” Luna asked with a grin. “What then?”

“I don’t know,” Dexter replied simply. “I don’t have a shred of evidence to support said claims, and I won’t consider the possibility until I do.”

“You are certainly entitled to your doubts whelp.” Luna replied, trying to hide her smile as she fought, yet quickly succumbed to the urge to trifle with the brazen colt. “But tell me, why do you not listen to the other ponies in Ponyville? Do you believe that they wish to deceive you, or do you feel that you know better than everypony else here?”

Dexter tapped his chin for a moment. “Both.” He declared. “I know more about astronomy than anyone else in this dinky little town.”

Luna chuckled. “Such brazen confidence. Do you really believe you know better than I, the Princess of the Night…?” Luna pointed toward herself before motioning toward Twilight. “Or that you know better than Twilight Sparkle, one who has received the best education Equestria could offer.”

It wasn’t even a question for Dexter, and to some degree his confidence was justified. A fact the ponies would agree with had they known about his secret lab.

However, without that knowledge, he only came across as egotistical.

“Yes.” The colt declared. He earned a frown from Twilight and Spike, but an amused chuckle from the princess.

“Perhaps a contest is in order,” Luna goaded. “Let us test each other’s knowledge of astronomy and the night sky by asking each other questions, the first to fail to answer or get a question wrong loses.”

“If you are truly more knowledgeable, then surely you can prove it.” Luna baited. “But if you feel you’re not up to the task of competing against us then I’d completely understand and would think no less of you-”

“You’re on, princess!” It was another chance to take the tyrant down a notch, something too good to pass up.

“Ah” Luna cut the colt off. “Don’t be so quick to agree whelp. If we win, it shall cost you.”

“What, exactly?” Dexter’s eyes narrowed in suspicion at the alicorn’s grin, finally getting the sense that Luna had tricked him.

“If I win, you must celebrate Nightmare Night with Pipsqueak and me,” Luna declared.

“Fine,” Dexter rolled his eyes. “What do I get if I win?”

“You need not concern yourself with that.” Luna shot a smug grin. “You won’t win.”

“Well prepare to make it your concern, princess!” The colt approached Luna, poking her chest with a pointed hoof. “You’re about to get schooled in your own game!”

“Very well, since I chose the contest you may ask me the first question.” Luna offered.

Dexter stopped to think for a moment. “How many stars are visible in the night sky with the naked eye?” Dexter began.

“However many I choose,” Luna grinned as the colt frowned. He really should have seen such an answer coming, even though he didn’t think it was exactly fair or accurate. “But I’ve always strived for an average of four thousand nine-hundred for somepony viewing the night sky anywhere on the planet on a cloudless night.”

“That’s a garbage, subjective answer.” The colt refuted.

“But a correct one, nonetheless.” Luna replied while raising a pointed hoof. “Now I believe it is my turn. What is the brightest object that can be found in the night sky?”

“The moon,” Dexter answered immediately. “It is the second brightest object in the sky, day or night.”

“True,” Luna accepted. “For when I choose to let the moon be seen in the night sky.” She motioned for the colt to ask his next question.

Dexter tapped his chin with a frown. When Luna proposed a debate, he didn’t think she would put up propaganda as factual answers. At least, what he thought was propaganda was being treated as fact.

Which meant finding a question she couldn’t answer would be extremely difficult. The question would have to be a physical fact about the universe itself, something that she couldn’t declare was up to her choosing.

Of course he could ask something to blow her mind, like: ‘What quality of quantum fermions induces the electron degeneracy pressure that prevents white dwarf stars from collapsing into black holes?’

But that might end up raising some questions he didn’t want to answer.

“Uh, how long does it take light from the moon to reach us?” Dexter asked slowly, hesitantly looking up at the alicorn. She gave the colt a sly grin, more than confident in the colt’s imminent loss.

“It depends on how far away we wish to place the moon. But an average of 1.3 seconds given the distance I usually keep it at.” Luna replied. “now, for my question.”

“What is the composition of the moon’s surface?” She challenged.

Dexter took a moment to think, pretending to mull over his answer.

When he didn’t answer immediately, Luna lowered her head to the colt’s ear, grinning all the way. “I expect you to have an impressive Nightmare-Night costume.” She taunted.

However, the smug grin on her face fell off quickly when Dexter immediately answered. “The lunar surface is comprised of Oxygen, Silicon, Aluminum, Iron, Calcium, Magnesium, and trace levels of other elements.”

“That’s… correct.” Luna said, trying to hide her astonishment.

“Wait a second,” Twilight cut in, scrutinizing the colt. “How do you know that? The best astronomers to date only have an educated guess. After all, Princess Luna is the only one who has been to the moon, and as far as I can tell, she hasn’t told anypony the actual composition of the moon’s crust.”

“Twilight… the answer is very simple and I’m surprised you don’t know.” Dexter replied curtly. “On a cosmic scale, the moon isn’t in our backyard, it’s on our doorstep. Which means it was likely formed by the same thing that formed the gigantic ‘rock’ were standing on.” Dexter tapped the floor with a hoof. “Which means they should be made of roughly the same stuff.”

“Thy answer was merely a guess.” Luna declared dismissively.

“Yes,” Dexter lied. “But a correct one, nonetheless.”The colt copied Luna’s phrase while mimicking her pointed hoof. “And I believe I only lose this debate when I answer a question incorrectly.”

“Very well, pose thy next question.” Luna flicked her tail in annoyance.

Again Dexter tapped his chin, formulating a trick question rather quickly.

“What is the closest star to Equestria?” Dexter asked, forcing a straight face.

“One of my choosing,” Luna replied simply. “Right now, the star is called Proxy Centa-“

She was cut off by the colt trying to mimic a buzzer. “Wrong!” He declared.

“Excuse us?” Luna frowned. “You presume to know which of mine star’s is closer, after it is we who move them?”

“The sun is the closest star to Equestria!” The colt explained. “And it is the one star that is not in your choosing, and not under your control. I believe your propaganda says that one belongs to your sister.”

“But… I…” Luna paused, realizing her mistake. “Nay! Tis a technicality! We thought thou were referring only to what belonged to the night!”

“Yes, it’s a technicality,” Dexter admitted. “But you’re still technically wrong, and I technically won.” He declared smugly. “Should I be concerned with what I win now?”

“Wait a second Dexter,” Twilight interrupted once more. “In case you haven’t noticed, Princess Luna’s speech patterns… aren’t exactly modern. In fact, her speech and vocabulary are out of date. The dialect she speaks is from a time period where the stars and the sun were regarded as exclusively different. From Luna’s time period, nopony ever referred to the sun as a star. In fact, the definition of star in her ‘dialect’ excludes the sun. They didn’t even think the sun was a star!”

“The question she heard wasn’t the same as the same question you asked, and it’s not her fault.” Twilight added. “She simply misunderstood your question. If she knew what you asked, she would have gotten it correct.”

Dexter merely leaned forward with a smug grin, letting the library hang in silence for a few moments.

“But thou knew as much!” Luna accused as a wave of realization hit her. She stomped aggressively, leaving a large crack in the floor. “Thou knew we would misinterpret thy words before thy posed the question!”

Dexter laughed heartily. “It was a battle of wits after all, and I just won because you just answered my question incorrectly.” He turned away from the princess, satisfied in his victory.

“Nay! Come back.” Luna ordered the colt. “Pose another question in place of your deceptive one!”

“Now now, your highness.” Dexter said over his shoulder, having no restraint in his condescending tone. “It is bad manners, and unbecoming of a princess, to be a sore loser.”

…

“We now see why thou wert laughed at, and called stupid by the other foals this morn.” Luna hissed, ears pressed back against her head. “Thou art stubborn, foalish, and thou only quit now because thou art too scared to spare wits with us honorably, for fear that thy wit shall be proven inferior.”

“…and thy wit is inferior to ours, whelp.”

Dexter froze in place, standing in silence. “No one calls my intellect ‘inferior.’” He declared, rounding on the mares.

“Alright, Princess.” He stressed her title in a condescending tone. “You want the gloves to come off, then the gloves are coming off!” He declared, turning toward his saddlebags.

“Computer,” He whispered into his hoof as picked up the bags. “Teleport pictures of celestial objects straight into my saddlebags, not too exotic. Then stand by and wait for further instructions.”

“Task complete, Dexter. Standing by.” A monotone voice filled his ear as his bag shifted.

Of course, with his back to the alicorn, Dexter didn’t notice her ears flick before pointing at him. She couldn’t make out what he said, but she knew he had spoken to someone.

Dexter returned to the table separating himself from the alicorn, reached into his saddlebags and pulled out the photos.

Silence reigned as Dexter spread the pictures across the table, causing the scowl each mare held to fade.

The pictures were stunning.

“If you’re so smart, explain the dark spots in the clouds of these objects.” Dexter tapped one of the photos.

Again, it was a trick question. Luna would have to be familiar with the evolution of astronomy to understand how the pictures were taken in order to answer the question.

Unfortunately, she was absent for most of that. It was the same lowly trick he had used moments before, just made more palatable.

However, Luna didn’t even hear his words. She was too busy soaking in every detail, with a growing sense of happiness welling up inside her. She always loved finding foals who had taken an interest in the study of the night sky.

Twilight, however, was now feeling the familiar burn of unbridled curiosity.

“Dexter… these are incredible.” Twilight asked, pulling one of the pictures under her nose. “How did you get them? What method was used to-”

“Wouldn’t the unicorn like to know?” Dexter replied flippantly, causing Twilight’s head to recoil. “I would gladly explain, but I don’t think you’d hear me around your big fat tribal horn!”

“Dexter, I am NOT tribalist. Now tell me, where and how did you get these pictures?” Twilight demanded, punctuating the forcefulness of her request with a stomp. The colt could tell there was more than curiosity motivating her question now.

It almost felt like she had something to prove, probably trying to validate her suspicions in front of the princess.

And Dexter wasn’t going to make it easy for her.

“You don’t know how to get these kinds of pictures?” Dexter asked, feigning skepticism. “It’s a rather simple technique.”

“Do tell,” Twilight challenged.

“Normally I would, but if I recall correctly, I told you yesterday that I wasn’t going to give you any more help in scientific matters.” Dexter replied with a shrug. “Go look it up on your own. But I’ll give you a hint, try looking through books that weren’t written by unicorns.”

Twilight growled in frustration, bring her head down to Dexter’s level. “Dexter, astronomy is one of my hobbies. I know that nopony has been able to get photos of that quality before, so don’t say it was pre-equestria earth ponies”

“But you seem to be able to do things a lot of other ponies can’t. And considering what else you’ve done around this town so far, I shouldn’t be surprised. Make it easier for both of us, Dexter.” Twilight drew up to full height. “And admit I’m right, you’re-“

“Dexter's correct, Twilight.” Luna cut in, finally breaking her silence as she looked away from the photos for the first time.

“He is?”

“I am?”

Both Twilight and Dexter nearly choked in surprise at the alicorns words.

“Yes,” Luna raised an eyebrow in suspicion. “Are you surprised by that?”

“No…” Dexter said, hesitating as he realized his blunder. “I just didn’t think you’d admit it…”

“You must learn to think better of me whelp.” Luna replied before turning to Twilight. “The technique used to get pictures like these was developed many, many years ago by a pegasus clan.”

“Back before the tribes were united, the pegasi had taken an interest in the night sky,” Luna began to lecture. “They were much more militaristic back then, and had a penchant for exploration. They required a way for troops and explorers to navigate with precision when they flew at night. But they had a problem, the unicorn tribe could manipulate the stars in the night sky much like they could move the sun.”

“The pegasi soon discovered that if they flew high enough, where the atmosphere was thinner, they could see celestial objects that unicorns couldn’t from the ground. The unicorns couldn’t manipulate what they couldn’t see, or knew not was there.”

“I was fortunate to see a few paintings they made, depicting those objects. They were very similar to these photos. I can only assume that photos are now possible because of some new invention?”

“but… but…” Twilight began, almost beside herself. However, Dexter cut in before she could say anything more.

“That’s correct…” Dexter began. “The ‘camera’ allows said technique to be used at ground level.”

“Oh?” Luna asked in surprise.

“Very long exposure times for the film in a camera placed under a telescope allows one to photograph objects that are normally too dim to see at ground level, producing an image. So I don’t have to ask a Pegasus for help. In fact, you have everything you need to get such photos with the stuff in this library.”

“But… These pictures have the greatest quality I’ve ever seen.” A bewildered Twilight reexamined the photos. “I just don’t understand how you could get photos like these as an amateur…”

A tiny piece of Dexter’s ego burned at being called amateur. The truth was, he was far from one. In fact, he knew that the quality Twilight spoke of could only be achieved by a satellite.

But the ponies didn’t know that, and Luna’s lack of knowledge for the use of cameras made her none the wiser.

And Dexter wasn’t about to be honest, and the colt had to admit to himself he was going to get a perverse pleasure out of clobbering Twilight’s understanding.

“An amateur is better than an institutionalized tribalist!” Dexter blurted out.

“Nay, Dexter.” Luna interrupted before a fuming Twilight could retort. “The loss of such knowledge was not the result of tribalism… The technique was merely lost to history.” Luna tried to hide a growing bitterness in her voice. “During the unification of the tribes, Celestia made a deal to establish permanent guiding stars. It shackled my night sky for… our political objectives. It was one of many ‘concessions’ my night sky and I were forced to make for the… betterment of Equestria.”

“With permanent guiding stars, the pegasi had no more need for such techniques.” Luna went on, traces of bitterness in her tone. “They, forsook the study of the night sky and eventually… eventually the knowledge faded through war and strife. Of course they never stopped studying the sun to learn how it affected the weather.” Luna added.

“But we are glad to see all was not lost!” Luna turned toward Dexter with the biggest smile he had ever seen on a pony. In fact, it scared him slightly, causing him to take a few hesitant steps back.

However, it did him little good. Not a second later he felt himself flying through the air, pulled by a blue aura.

He landed firmly against Luna’s chest, before being wrapped by a pair of powerful legs and oddly strong wings.

“We are soooo glad to have met thee whelp!” Luna cheered as she rocked back and forth with the colt in her suffocating hug.

“Gaah! Let go you oversized hellacious despot!” Dexter screamed, struggling as he was pulled deeper into the bone-crushing hug. In truth, it wasn’t all that unpleasant. In fact, Luna‘s coat turned out to be one of the softest he had ever felt. But that was no consolation for the agonizing death of his dignity.

Action Hank wouldn’t allow himself to be snuggled involuntarily by a pony princess.

“We thought this knowledge was lost to time forever!” Luna nuzzled the colt despite his struggling. Eventually he resigned to his fate, there was no escaping the alicorn’s steel grip. “We always love to find one who appreciates the beauty of my night sky!”

“It’s not your night sky!” Dexter struggled to lift his head away from her fur. He would have folded his forelegs if they weren’t pressed against Luna’s chest.

“It’s okay whelp.” Luna replied, still smiling. “We forgive thy insolence. It is, after all, a product of mere ignorance.”

Luna shifted the colt to her side, wrapping one of her wings over his back, holding the colt between her powerful wing and the alicorn’s side. Much to his surprise, her wing easily had the strength to hold him firmly.

That didn’t stop him from struggling, fruitlessly. Luckily he wasn’t too uncomfortable; he was used to being handled given his small stature in the face of his older sister.

“You still haven’t answered my question.” The colt challenged. “Why are some of the clouds dark?”

Luna glanced at the photograph once more, drifting back into thought. “I… don’t know,” She admitted, causing Dexter to grin triumphantly. “Because this picture was taken with a camera, a device created well after my banishment, I don’t know. After all, there were far more important things for us to learn since our return than the operation of an automated painting device.”

“Ah ha!” Dexter declared triumphantly, wriggling in celebration as much as Luna’s wing would let him. “For your information, the lightness or darkness of the clouds are relative. So the dark clouds are giving off light, just not as much as the stuff around it. I win! ”

“It appears so, whelp.” Luna grinned. “Though not because of my knowledge of the stars was insufficient, but because of an invention made in my absence.”

“So what do I win?” Dexter asked smugly. “Or is it still not a concern?”

“Thou have won an opportunity many wish for,” Luna grinned smugly. “Thou will have the privilege of… celebrating Nightmare Night with ourselves and Pipsqueak.”

“Hey!” Dexter recoiled. “Thanks but no thanks, I’m not celebrating-“

“If you think thy reward is optional, then thou are mistaken. We expect thy costume to be excellent,” Luna ordered, ignoring Dexter’s frown. She turned her gaze back toward the pictures on the table. “Oh, and we shall be keeping these.”

As she inspected the pictures another time, she noticed the edges of two more photographs poking out the side of Dexter’s saddlebags. Without a second thought, she summoned them with her magic.

---

“Release me at once!” Dexter protested, his face red as he struggled fruitlessly against the alicorn’s wing.

Unfortunately for him, Luna couldn’t hear the colt over the sound of her own laughter. And even if she did, she couldn’t release the colt even if she wanted to. Her wings would clamp to her sides during bouts of uncontrollable laughter.

The photos she had summoned were the ones Dexter had taken from Sweetie Belle, and were hidden in his saddlebags to prevent them from being seen before they could be destroyed.

Of course, when Luna pulled them from Dexter’s bag, she was expecting something totally different. However, a few seconds of staring and the alicorn fell to her haunches, laughing hysterically.

At first, Twilight tried to suppress her laughter. Unfortunately, the booming gaffs from the alicorn were infectious.

“Those pictures are not for public viewing!” Dexter fumed, his face still red as he continued squirming.

“Does… does thou enjoy wearing lipstick and a dress, Dexter?” Luna barely managed. “Perhaps thou wishes that thou were born a mare instead?”

Eventually Luna’s laughter started to die down, letting her look at the crimson colt without bursting into a fit of giggles.

“Can you let me go now?” Dexter pouted.

Luna eyed the colt under her wing, hesitating to answer him. Eventually she gave a long sigh. “I’m afraid not, whelp.”

“We have found thy, er, your company entertaining, Dexter.” Luna shifted on her haunches. “But I need to ask you some questions, questions which I need you to answer honestly, understand?”

“Questions, what kind of questions?” Dexter frowned.

However, Luna merely glanced at Twilight before turning to look back at the colt. She had decided she would question Dexter in his dreams that night, where it would be astoundingly more difficult for him to lie to her. She could get him to relive his own memories, displaying them for her to view.

However, doing so was a massive breach of privacy; and Luna felt obligated to give the colt a chance to be honest and avoid such an intrusion.

That is, of course, if he had something to hide. Luna still couldn’t tell, changelings had demonstrated an astounding ability to misdirect investigations. The colt could merely be a time consuming distraction.

“As we told your class this morning, we have come to Ponyville to investigate changelings.” Luna stated. “And we’ve accumulated a number of unanswered questions, many of them revolve around thou. Some… have even come to believe that thou may have been involved in the recent clashes which plagued this town.”

“By ‘some,’ I assume you mean Miss Sparkle.” Dexter deadpanned. “I assure you, whatever Miss Sparkle has told you is incorrect. She is-"

“Whom raised these concerns is not of importance.” Luna cut in. “I have seen enough on my own to have questions.”

“I assure you, Princess, Miss Sparkle accusations are just as wild as they are unfounded.” Dexter dismissed.

“Dexter…” Twilight huffed in a warning tone, only for Luna to shake her head in the unicorn’s direction.

“I haven’t done anything wrong,” The colt protested. “I can’t imagine why either of you would suspect me of anything!”

“Whether or not thou’ve done something wrong remains to be seen,” Luna answered, looking directly at the colt. “But I wish for you to be completely honest. You can tell us anything right now and you won’t get in trouble.” Luna promised.

“There’s nothing to tell,” Dexter replied. “I haven’t done anything.”

“Dexter, dost thou know anything about the device found in the Ponyville hospital that could detect changelings?” Luna asked directly, deciding to start from the very beginning. She kept her tone firm but gentle, this was a child she was dealing with after all.

Of course, if she knew the half of it, she would not be taking the firm but gentle approach.

“Yup, and I stole the diagrams for it too.” Dexter admitted cheekily, so easily it caused Luna to blink.

“So thou… admits thy stole the diagrams?” Luna asked again.

“Yup!” Dexter rolled his eyes. “Isn’t that something Miss Sparkle accused me of? I guess you caught me, and I might as well confess everything.”

“Wait, what?” Twilight coughed, hardly able to believe what she was hearing. “You admit to everything… just like that?”

“Of course! I should also tell you my other secrets!” Dexter went on, not losing a bit of his cheeky tone. -“I’m also an immortal alicorn that raises the sun every other Tuesday so Princess Celestia can take a day off every once in awhile.” He turned back to the princess. “I also crashed the moon last month, but don’t worry, I put it back good as new.”

“Do not toy with us, speak truthfully.” Luna warned, though it went right over Dexter’s head.

“Who’s toying with you? I’m being honest! What other ludicrous claims did Miss Sparkle make again? That I fought the changelings, correct?” Dexter went on, rolling his eyes once more. “Well’ she’s right! In fact, I fight changelings on a regular basis. I was the one who defeated the changelings during the Canterlot invasion. It was awesome, you must have seen me kick their butts!”

“Oh wait… you left Equestria hanging that day.” Dexter finished with a smug grin, however it didn’t last when he looked up to see the fuming alicorn.

The fuming alicorn with glowing eyes, whose anger seemed to seep into the room, causing the entire library to slowly grow dark.

Dark and cold.

The alicorn had a temper.

Of course, Dexter didn’t know he had hit a nerve with that last comment. Failing to appear in Equestria’s time of need was another source of shame and self loathing for the princess, and she didn’t need the colt to mock her.

The room was actually cold enough Dexter could see his own breath, but only barely given the newfound dark. However, despite the cold air, the wing draped around Dexter remained warm to the touch.

“Do not play games with us whelp.” Luna warned once more, her voice magically altered to echo through the air. She was whispering in the royal Canterlot voice, which kept her voice at a reasonable volume. “We instructed thee to be honest, and honest thou shalt be!”

Luna could be scary when she wanted to be. It didn’t help the colt that he was trapped right under her wing.

And the sight was downright scary to the colt, causing him to instinctively curl into the alicorn’s side. He was actually starting to tremble, wanting to hide from the glowing eyes which seemed to drill into his own. But Luna’s wing-gripped tightened around him, making it clear that he was going nowhere.

A few moments of silence reigned before the dark receded and warmth returned to the room.

“Speak,” Luna instructed, her eyes and voice returning to normal.

Silence reigned for a number of moments as Dexter hesitated, long enough to get Luna to wonder if she had taken it a little too far. However, by this point Dexter was certain that merely denying the accusations wouldn’t alleviate the alicorn’s suspicions. He would have to give her something true.

That, and he didn’t want to risk upsetting her again. Dee Dee was enough to scare this kid, but Luna was in a league of her own.

“T-the changeling asked me the same thing.” Dexter admitted, succeeding in confusing the two mares.

“What?” Luna’s eyes fixed on the colt, drilling into his own. “What did a changeling ask you?”

“She asked me about the device in the Ponyville clinic,” Dexter explained, still trying to shrink from the alicorn’s gaze. “Just like you.”

“When did this happen?” Twilight asked, softening her tone slightly. This was the first progress she has had with the colt, and she wasn’t happy it had to come by scaring the child.

“The day before you found the real Miss Cheerilee.” Dexter answered.

“Explain Dexter,” Luna instructed. “Who was this changeling impersonating, and what did they ask you?”

“It was the changeling impersonating Miss Cheerilee.” Dexter began hesitantly. “The entire class spent the whole day with her and didn’t even know she was a fake! She waited until school ended and everyone else went home before asking me a bunch of questions.

“I didn’t even think changelings existed before then. I thought they were another lie you made up to control everyone, but then the changeling attacked me…”

“The changeling attacked you?” Luna felt her temper flare once more, but it wasn’t because of the colt’s comment. She had a distaste for anyone who hurt foals.

Luna stomped a fore hoof, causing a portion of the floor near her hoof to break off and fall into the basement below. Noticing what she had done, the princess took a few moments to calm herself with a few deep breathes.

“Yes,” Dexter went on. “I managed to get away at first, but she followed, chasing me halfway across the school. Then she cornered me…”

Dexter hesitated, trying to think of what to say next. Up until now he had been telling the truth, a changeling did ambush him by pretending to be his teacher. But telling Luna that he ‘then knocked the changeling out, dragged it off to his secret lab, and interrogated it with a hologram,’ might create many more questions than he’d be willing to answer.

“Go on,” Luna pressed lightly.

“And, I told her everything she wanted to know.” Dexter finally answered, lying.

“Which was?”

“That I found the device in an empty room and brought it to where I slept… it was across the hall, room 407 to be exact.” Dexter stated, remembering one of the unoccupied rooms he had raided to get parts for the device.

“Is that all?” Luna asked, causing Dexter to nod.

“Dexter, why didn’t you tell anypony this sooner?” Twilight asked, but her tone made it more of a criticism. “The princess’s investigation could be days, or weeks, behind the changelings now! And this doesn’t explain everything!”

“The first thing the changeling said to me was a threat!” Dexter retorted. “I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want the changelings to come after me because I was talking! But thanks to you they’re probably going to abduct me, then leave a replacement so no one knows the difference!"

“And I have you to thank for it because you wouldn’t simply let things go! You big fat stupid-“

“Dexter,” Luna cut in. “Are you certain that is everything you know? You can trust me to-”

“Trust you?” Dexter shot back. “Why in the world would I trust you? You cornered me just like the changeling did, and then you threatened me to get the information you wanted just like the changeling. You’re no better than they are!”

“Dexter, we…” Luna cursed her temper now. “Dexter, we never threatened you.”

“Your intimidation was not verbal,” Dexter looked away from the alicorn. “But it was a threat all the same. At worst you’re a tyrant, as best you’re a thug who’d threaten me to get what she wanted.”

“Dexter, look at me.” She implored, however Dexter hadn’t decided to listen until he spotted the pleading look in her eyes. “If you believe nothing else of us, know that we would never hurt a child.”

“I don’t believe you.”

---

“I still don’t think he told us everything,” Twilight protested, breaking the silence of the library for the first time since Dexter had left. “He was way too confident of himself yesterday, and what he said doesn’t explain half of what we’ve seen…”

“We know this Twilight Sparkle,” Luna replied softly, her mind seemingly a million miles away. For everything that happened, she again felt a sense of familiarity from the colt. Luna was certain she had met him before that morning, and racked her memory to recall every foal she had met since her return.

But still came up with nothing.

“So then why’d we let him go?” Twilight asked in frustration, however she quickly bit her lip after remembering that she was addressing a princess.

“Because it doesn’t matter,” Luna answered softly once more. “We will be entering his dreams this evening to see what he knows directly. We will know everything from him without having to stress him further.”

Twilight couldn’t help but produce a triumphant smile.

“Do not be so happy, Twilight Sparkle.” Luna went on. “We do not enjoy infiltrating the dreams of those who do not wish to share them.”

“Princess, if he knows something important, doing this may help protect him and other ponies.” Twilight consoled. “This isn’t wrong.”

“Perhaps, but if you wish to join us in our viewing of Dexter’s dreams, be asleep by eight.”

“I’ll be there, your highness.”

“Alright Quadraplex, that’s enough. End playback.” Dexter declared, causing the images of Luna and Twilight to vanish in a flash. “That was three hours ago…” Dexter went on, turning to the changeling standing beside him.

“Looks like you’ve got a problem,” The changeling stated the obvious.

“I can handle the dreams part,” Dexter assured. “I just need to know how to throw off their suspicions. It seems they are keeping their suspicions hush-hush for now, because they think they can catch me by surprise. But the moment Applejack finds out about all of this, I’m doomed. I have to stop this here.”

“Well,” The changeling tapped her chin. “I think your bigger problem at the moment is the dream infiltration…”

“I have experimented with dream alteration technology in the past,” Dexter replied, remembering a device he had built to combat nightmares. Of course, Dee Dee had ruined everything. “That is if the magic dampers don’t work. Besides, I have plans tonight… I won’t be going to sleep.”

“Well, I wouldn’t go head to head with the ‘Mistress of Dreams’ in the dreamscape.” The changeling replied. “I might be able to help you with my magic…”

“Quadraplex has standing orders to rip your horn out if you use any amount of magic on me,” Dexter replied curtly, of course he wasn’t telling the truth since no such order have been given. But the changeling couldn’t tell that given the active magic dampeners. “And I’d prefer not to clean up that mess, so the answer is no, you won’t be using your magic on me.”

“Well, that settles that!” The changeling replied hastily. “As for uhh… their suspicions, I have a solution, but that will be a little more complicated.”

“Go on…”

“Back in the days when changelings were still considered myths, whenever a changeling was somehow discovered by accident, one of the ways of creating a cover-up was a disinformation campaign.”

“Disinformation campaign? What do you mean?” Dexter tilted his head as he mulled the thought over.

“You use lots of illusion magic make a great number of ponies see weird and crazy things.” The changeling went on. “And with a large amount of disinformation floating around, nopony will know what’s true, and probably wont believe the truth when they hear it. Especially if they are told somepony saw a changeling.”

“Or in your case, a strange colt with advanced technology.”

“I see…” Dexter grinned, this sounded like something he could have fun with.

“If you’re good enough, you’ll even confuse Twilight and Princess Luna. Not only will they doubt their suspicions, they might dismiss them. Nopony would think twice about an odd little colt like you without concrete and undeniable proof.” The changeling finished, pacing around the clean room slowly.

“But be warned, you can’t give them more to be suspicious about while you’re spreading disinformation.“ The changeling warned. “Princess Luna’s position means that she doesn’t require proof of any kind in order to act. If she is convinced you’re behind everything, you’re caught.”

“Well, thank you for your help, uh…” Dexter scratched his head in confusion. “What’s your name again?”

“I don’t have one, changelings rarely have names.” She answered. “A changeling has to prove herself to be truly exceptional in some way before the hive will even allow her the chance to earn a name, the rest of us are addressed by our ranks or do not carry a label.”

“Then… how do you distinguish between one another?”

“That’s difficult to explain…” She scratched her head.

“Why?” Dexter asked, slightly confused.

“We’re a race of shapeshifters; we specialize in not being distinguished from others.”

“Fair enough… I guess,” Dexter turned and motioned toward the cryo-stasis pod. “Alright, My questions are answered for today. In you go.”

The changeling looked at the pod will tapping her hooves together hesitantly, bearing a pleading frown. “Do I have too? Being frozen isn’t the most pleasant of experiences…”

“Well, it’s either go into stasis or starve to death in here.” Dexter replied with a shrug.

“You could always just… love me…”

“Yeah, not happening.”

The changeling grumbled to herself as she crawled back into the pod, folding her arms with a frown as the lid on the pod closed. Shortly after the pod’s window iced over.

“Computer, door.” The colt called before the clean room door swung open, allowing him to push out into the lab.

The lab itself was coming along nicely, and smoothly given that Dee Dee was not around. The tireless efforts of both Dexter and Quadraplex had begun to pay off; everything he had built from salvaged junk from around Ponyville had been replaced with clean and sleeker devices.

And it was still growing.

“Computer, what is the progress on the project I gave you this morning?” Dexter asked.

“Construction of a time machine is nearly completely, however I am unable to complete the project.” Quadraplex replied, remaining monotone. “Several files about your original time machine are incomplete, therefore I do not have specifications required to overcome a few technical difficulties. I require assistance.”

“Very well,” Dexter replied. It didn’t take him long to find the nearly completed device, alongside were a set of tools waiting for him. However, it was a lot bigger than he expected, apparently capable of generating a portal large enough for a truck to drive through it.

However, it wasn’t until he had set to working about the device that Quadraplex spoke up again.

“Dexter, I have some concerns about this project and our current goals,” The computer stated. “Shouldn’t we be preparing to deal with this ‘dream infiltration’ Princess Luna is preparing?”

“Yes and no,” Dexter said, removing a panel before sticking his head inside the time machine. “I’ll deal with it tomorrow. When I go to the past, I’ll program my return trip for early tomorrow morning. So if she comes looking for me in the ‘dreamscape’ she’ll find I’m not there.”

“This project is ill-advised.” Quadraplex stated bluntly. “Going back in time is not only dangerous to the integrity of the timeline, it also presents an extreme risk of injury to you.”

“Quadraplex, the timeline isn’t a fragile thing so you don’t have to treat it like it is made out of glass.” Dexter assured. “Remember, I’ve traveled through time plenty of times, like that one time I went back in time and found the first guy to discover fire.”

“Yes, and according to my files, he got lost in your lab, caused considerable destruction, and worst of all: was exposed to your sister Dee Dee, which could have destroyed the timeline.” The computer reminded. “I am not sure how this, or your other experiences, inspire confidence.”

“In case you don’t remember Quadraplex, I wasn’t born here.” Dexter reminded. “How did you put it? I could have come from an entirely separate universe. Whatever I do to the timeline won’t result in a universe ending grandfather paradox or something.”

“That is beside the point, I don’t care about the timeline” The A.I. declared forcefully. “I care about you. Should something go wrong during your mission to the past, I will not be able to help you.”

“You? Care?” Dexter grumbled dismissively. “Last time I checked I never programmed you to care.”

…

“I will no longer assist you in this project,” Quadraplex replied. However, declaration was ignored by the colt.

At least it was until the lights shut off.

“Computer…” Dexter growled, “Computer!”

No response.

“Alright Quadraplex, alright.” Dexter let out a tired sigh. “I’m sorry, just talk to me okay? When I go back in time I’ll only be observing the equines. I won’t do anything dangerous. As for this load of garbage about ‘Nightmare Moon’ and the solar-lunar war, it’s all just made up propaganda. And once I go back in time, I’ll get proof of it. You’ll see.”

“But what if you are wrong?” Quadraplex challenged. “You were wrong about the changelings being a myth, and you were wrong about claiming that the sun and moon did not revolve around the planet. What if you’re wrong about Nightmare Moon? What if she was real?”

“Okay, say she was real, then what?” Dexter droned sarcastically as he rolled his eyes. “Watch her get defeated by the elements of harmony and the power of friendship?” Dexter scoffed. “Let’s face it; Nightmare Moon wouldn’t be that big of a deal.”

“I mean, think about,” Dexter continued his rant. “In the story of Nightmare Moon’s return she created the conditions which allowed for Twilight and her friends to become the elements of harmony, which in turned were used to defeat her.”

“If she’s real, she‘s such a pushover she’d probably defeat herself.” Dexter finished. “So either way, Nightmare Moon isn’t a real problem.”

“Very well,” The computer eventually replied. “I will assist you if you intend to only observe the equines and avoid all contact as much as possible.”

“Good, now if you will please restore the lights, I can get back to-“

“I’m not finished,” Quadraplex interrupted. “I will also require that you be outfitted appropriately should you need to defend yourself. Given the ongoing changeling threat, I have redeveloped several tools and weapons you used in your original lab.”

“You’re worse than my mother,” Dexter sighed. “Very well, Quadraplex, it’s a deal.”

“Agreed,” Quadraplex declared, turning the lights back on.

---

Mission Log: Temporal Excursion

Date: 1000 years prior to arrival in Equestria

Location: Everfree Castle / Castle of the Royal Sisters*

Dexter, Scientist, Boy Genius!

[Voice-to-Text Active]

This is the mission Log of Dexter, Boy Genius, during my trip to the past. I’ve traveled just over a thousand years to the past to acquire proof that ‘Nightmare Moon’ never existed. And I am happy to report that, thus far, I have encountered no evidence of any kind to indicate that this ‘Nightmare Moon’ individual exists.

But let me start from the beginning.

For the record, I immediately activated the sensor module and the Omni-recorder the moment I stepped out of the portal. Everything I see, hear, and do, shall be recorded from all angles.

My time machine worked flawlessly, just like the original, and deposited me just over 1000 years in the past. I arrived intact along with the crate of supplies Quadraplex insisted I bring along.

That computer can be really persistent, to the point that it has become tiresome. She insisted that I bring back a freight container of ‘essentials.” I literally mean a freight container; the box she sent with me is just about the same sizes as those large rectangular boxes you’d find on a large shipping boat.

But what was more staggering was what she put inside it. Did she expect me to fight an army or something? What the heck Quadraplex!? I don’t even remember engineering half of these weapons! And that’s not to mention the rifle she made me carry on my back…

She said she built it for my fight against the changelings, which makes sense I suppose.

What is worse is the fact that she forced me to wear a re-designed version of my ‘DexStar’ suit. I say redesigned because it looks nothing like my original DexStar suit except for the fact it is black with minor purple highlights. But it does use an upgraded version of the nanotechnology from my original suit.

It’s really is well made, Quadraplex did a good job. But she also added a lot of things to it: strength enhancement, force amplifiers, vision assist, sensor module, armor, a cloak, a small magic dampener whose effects are limited to just my person, and a number of other things.

But there is one problem with this suit: I can’t take it off! The darn thing is wired directly into my PNS. [Peripheral Nervous System] I can only take this thing off back at the lab!

I can’t use any of these weapons if I hope to preserve the timeline; just being seen by one of the primitives could give them ideas which would radically change the future. Of course Quadraplex knew that, but apparently she doesn’t care about anything other than my safety…

I really need to have a serious talk with her when I get back; her behavior is getting out of hand and cannot be tolerated any longer. I understand she wants to be ready for any threat posed by the changelings, but this is getting excessive. I’m a scientist, not a weapons manufacturer.

However, I digress.

Thankfully my arrival went unnoticed; the portal deposited me in an unused field filled with tall grass. Quadraplex had the sense to include a cloak for the crate she sent with me, it shouldn’t be discovered.

Judging by the sun hanging over head, this ‘Nightmare Moon’ stuff will be debunked soon enough; and I’ll be back to the future in no time.

Granted, my temporal target coordinates were for four days before Nightmare Moon’s defeat was actually supposed to occur, but I’m not getting the sense this is a nation about to rip itself apart with civil war. But before I can find anything conclusively, I’ll have to locate the princesses. But I have no doubt that I’ll find no indications of Nightmare Moon. When I find Princess Luna, given that she is actually alive at this point in time, which I doubt, I’m certain she’ll show no traces of anything that could be construed as ‘Nightmare Moon.’

Then I’ll finally have the proof I need to rub in everyone’s faces, forcing them to admit their propaganda and lies.

Of course… there will be a great difficulty in using the proof. I can’t exactly tell them that I went back in time.

But I am going to focus on getting the proof before I decide how to go about using it.

The portal placed me a few miles north of the castle of the royal pony sisters. The castle itself was surrounded by a small village which bordered the Everfree Forest.

The trek to the village was easy enough, but I soon hit my first obstacle.

There were guards at the front gate of the castle.

Sneaking past them with the suit’s cloak should be easy enough. The suit Quadraplex gave me has some limitations. The cloak is not indefinite, and the suit has a power source which can be depleted. Once it is depleted, I’ll have to wait for it to recharge. However , given that the magic dampener works by siphoning off energy from magic I’m certain I can recharge it faster if I found something magical to drain.

This should be easy.

End Log.

---

“It’s about time,” Dexter muttered to himself as he spied around another corner of the castle, finally locating one of the lunar banners marking the entrance to Luna’s wing of the castle. He had gotten lost in the maze of stone walls that made up the castle, cursing at the convoluted layout of the castle.

Sneaking throughout the castle had been easier than he thought; the cloak prevented any of the guards or servants from noticing him. But it also stopped the colt from asking for directions.

That, and the cloak was eating through his suit's power.

He did, however, run into a few of the servants speaking in what sounded like an ancient dialect of English. It wasn’t difficult for the boy genius to understand what they were saying, but he decided now would be the perfect time to try out his suit’s translator.

It would allow him to hear other’s as though they were speaking in the modern dialect, and would automatically translate what he said in the modern dialect to the ancient one, allowing others to hear him as if he were speaking normally.

Of course, it was the cheap way of getting around the dialect barrier. But it wasn’t like he was going to be talking to anyone and it was just more convenient for his ears.

“Now to find Luna’s chambers,” Dexter whispered, strolling through another hallway. It took a few minutes, but he eventually found a door with the lunar symbol engraved in its front. The doors themselves were flanked by four guards.

Much to Dexter’s surprise, he found that two of them were white with golden armor.

Resisting the urge to speculate aloud, Dexter checked to make sure his recorder was on. He had hardly put his foreleg down before the chamber doors burst open revealing a tall white figure, followed by a voice Dexter was extremely surprised to recognize.

“Answer me!” Luna demanded, following after her sister.

Despite the question, the tall white mare pressed past the guards without a word. She was an alicorn too, having both wings and a horn. To Dexter’s surprise, she was also significantly larger than Luna.

In fact, she was pushing the definition of a pony. Any taller and she would be classified as a horse.

Like Luna, she had a mane which appeared to blow in a nonexistent wind. But her mane appeared to a mix of colors reminiscent of the northern lights rather than a picture of the night sky.

The scowl on her face prevented Dexter from admiring the display. The piercing nature of her dark pink eyes let everyone know it was best to stay out of her way.

She pressed forward at a brisk pace, quickly enough that Dexter barely had enough time to step aside, narrowly avoiding a collision with the mare. Celestia managed to only get a few paces before the door behind her burst open again, revealing an equally irate Luna.

“I have a right to an answer!” Luna pressed, a flash of blue light deposited her before Celestia, causing the white mare to halt.

Dexter was momentarily surprised to hear Luna speaking fluently in the modern dialect, but that’s when he remembered his suit’s dialect and language translator was on.

“I have no wish to quarrel with you, again, Luna.” Celestia declared, frowning down at her sister. “You already know why I have made my decision.”

“Your decision? Are we not equals?” Luna glared up toward Celestia. “Or am I now your inferior? That you make decisions and I merely follow them?” Luna accused.

“Stop it Luna, you know that’s not what I meant.” Celestia shook her head with an aggravated sigh. “One of us must go northward for a time, to reassure our subjects and let Equestria’s enemies know we will protect our border. But one of us needs to remain here, and since I am better at negotiating with the nobles, it makes sense that-”

“Do not dissemble with me as though you are speaking merely to a politician, sister!” Luna’s voice was now enhanced, causing the invisible colt to grasp his ears once more in the hopes they wouldn’t start to bleed. “You mask your real reasons for sending me away on this ‘tour.’ You are consolidating your popularity among the nobles, and you’ve been doing so at my expense for years.”

Celestia sighed before looking toward the guards. “Leave us.” She ordered, eliciting a salute before they turned and left.

“Luna, we discussed this a long time ago” Celestia admitted to Luna. “I’ve spent years, and sacrificed much to build the rapport and political capital needed just to keep Equestria in one piece. Many elements in each tribe still wish to split away.

“That means I’ve had to maintain a level of popularity with our subjects, while letting you take care of the less favorable tasks…” Celestia went on. “But now it’s paying off, I am able to use that popularity to maintain the cooperation of many. If I were to leave, then those who would try to incite dissent against us would use my absence as an opportunity…”

“Which means I have to continue to do the unfavorable and unpopular tasks, while you continue to bask in the praise and esteem of our subjects.” Luna accused bitterly. “You knowingly earn their favor at the cost of myself.”

“I tire of this argument, Luna. We have had the same one again and again in growing frequency over this last year.” Celestia began again with a frustrated sigh. “We made our strategy long ago, and we’re not changing it just because you are jealous.”

“I recall our plan!” Luna sneered. “But it has gone on for long enough, how much longer must I wait before you allow me to step out from behind your shadow? Why must you continue to hoard the favor of our subjects?”

“What fault is it of mine that our subjects prefer to work and live during the day? Or that they choose to satisfy their need to sleep during the night?” Celestia retorted. “This isn’t about what’s best for Equestria, nor is it about what’s fair, this is about your jealousy.”

“My feelings are irrelevant. You let this go on longer than is fair. It causes our subjects of prefer your presence over mine!” Luna accused.

The hallway fell silent as the sisters glared at each other. Dexter could almost feel the anger radiating off of them. Dexter swore he could have seen Celestia’s eye twitch, as if a mental barrier had snapped behind her pink eyes.

“Perhaps it’s not the night our subjects find fault with, Luna.” Celestia eventually began again. “Perhaps the fault is yours.”

“Our subjects do not find the night unworthy of their adoration, but they might feel that it is you who are unworthy of representing the night and unworthy of their favor.” Celestia said icily.

“What…” Luna breathed, the anger surging inside her cut her breath short as she started to shake. The type of anger inside Luna wasn’t that which was brought about by having a bad temper, but rather so a product of harsh words spoken by someone close. “Your words are unfair and you know it.”

“Maybe, maybe not.” Celestia declared. “But we’re keeping to our plan. Deal with it. The throne room is not big enough for two princesses and your childish jealousy. If we have to contend with it, we may find that there is only enough room for one princess."

“And we both know who our subjects favor more.”

Celestia disappeared after rounding the end of the hall, leaving Luna trembling silently in anger. She stomped a fore hoof into the stone floor, creating a set of large cracks which radiated away from her hoof. The hit was strong enough Dexter could feel it through the stone floor.

Eventually Luna huffed before quickly turning back to her chambers, slamming the door with an aura of magic the second after the invisible colt ducked inside.

Luna’s chambers were everything Dexter expected, being luxuriously furnished. The lunar banners, as well as the image of Luna’s cutie mark, could be found plastered or carved onto just about everything.

The only thing he noticed to be out of place was a number of small patches in the floor with cracks radiating from a single point, today wasn’t the first time she had gotten angry.

‘Whoa,’ Dexter thought to himself. He’d hate to be on the wrong ends of that alicorn’s hooves. He thought it was fortunate that the little argument between Celestia and Luna gave him the chance to sneak into the princesses’ room. Something told him he that he would live to regret it if his cloak failed.

Of course, his mission was nearly completed. He had successfully found and recorded Princess Luna. Despite the apparent dysfunctional nature of her relationship with the other alicorn, Dexter found no proof of Nightmare Moon. At least, nothing he had seen was sufficient enough to be called proof in his eyes. As a good scientist he wanted to be thorough, choosing to record the alicorn for a bit longer.

Following the dark alicorn further into her chambers, Dexter found her standing in the middle of her bedroom.

She was still trembling with anger. Her piercing eyes and tightened jaw were hardly visible in the dark room. Much like what Dexter experienced before, the room seemed to drain of all light and warmth. Soon the room’s atmosphere reminded Dexter of a cold winter night. Luckily his suit kept him warm, as well as automatically activating its vision assistance, letting him continue to see in the pitch black darkness.

Though, the colt forgot all about it as Luna suddenly kicked a nearby cabinet. It shattered instantly, spraying splinters everywhere.

It wasn’t the first casualty of Luna’s wrath, and nothing being spared. The bed was next up to be smashed, then the dresser, then a desk. Even the stone walls were not immune to her onslaught; several large chunks of the stone were crushed by a set of very powerful hooves.

Eventually the storm of hooves and flurry of magic died down, leaving a sobbing Luna to collapse on the remains of her bed.

‘Okay! Coming in here was a really bad idea!’ Dexter panicked silently. The colt barely managed to escape the destruction of Luna’s chambers by climbing onto a chandelier, which escaped destruction by the mere virtue of hanging above Luna’s sight. Even as Luna fell to the remains of her bed, the colt still clung to the decoration as though his life depended on it.

“Sister your words are harsh… your actions unfair.” Luna eyes began tearing.

“Without the adoration and love of our subjects, what do we have to ease our burden?” Luna went on. “Our burden of immortality… the fruits of all friendship will always turn bitter with time. Without the love of our subjects, what am I left with to ease this pain ? All friends I have will abandon me to unending life through their own death. We shall always be alone…”

“Except for you sister, you were always with me.”

“Yet you abandon me now? In your ambition, in your ‘noble cause’ to spread harmony? To you I have become little more than a tool at best, or an obstacle to be removed at worst. You may be my sister, but you’re no longer my friend. Just like all the friends who left before, our friendship did not endure forever.” Luna’s whispering grew bitter. “But unlike our friends, you abandoned our friendship by choice!”

Luna dropped her head to the bed, streams pouring from her face.

Having watched the entire display from the chandelier, Dexter was more than concerned by what he just witnessed.

‘Okay, I admit that this alicorn is probably the same Princess Luna as in the future. She may be long lived after all,’ Dexter silently admitted to himself, anxiously searching for a way off the chandelier. He wanted to get down without making a sound, wanting more than anything to leave now. ‘and I admit that Princess Luna may be suffering from some radically extreme loneliness problems, but that doesn’t mean she is in any way suffering from a ‘Nightmare Moon’ alter ego.’

The colt immediately stopped his search when a voice speaking again.

“Lunaaaa” Dexter looked back down at the mare, finding her now staring into the fractured remains of a mirror. The voice he now heard sounded similar to Princess Luna, but it was deeper, almost cold despite its comforting tone. “Lunaaaa…”

“Luna, look at me.” The dark alicorn said into the mirror, waiting for a moment in silence before smiling. “There we are…”

“Luna, why is it that I find you here, crying alone in dark once again?” Luna asked her reflection.

Dexter’s eyes went wide as he watched the display below, his breath catching in his mouth as a shiver crawled up his spine. Admittedly, Luna was just talking to herself a few moments before, complaining about Celestia in an emotional fit. But this was just different…

‘What the…’ Now he really wanted to leave.

“Nightmare…” came Luna’s original voice.

“Yours truly,” Luna nodded toward the broken mirror with a smile.

“Be gone!” Luna demanded.

“I can’t Luna, and you know that…” Nightmare consoled. “Besides, you’re so lonely. You don’t really want me to go. But do not fret, I am a part of you. I’ve always been a part of you and I always will be. I’ll never abandon you… unlike some.”

“I will not listen to a figment of my imagination!” Luna declared, turning away from the mirror. However, as soon as she turned away the mare jerked back with a scowl.

“Oh Luna, you know I am much more than a mere figment…” The other voice went on in a consoling tone. “I am just as real as you are.”

“Have you come to feed me more poison about my sister?”

“Your sister has already fed you enough poison about herself!” The other voice said indignantly. “I’m just here to help you digest it…”

“She has been less kind as of late… less willing to hear me…” She drifted her gaze away from the mirror, only to snap back to it with a scowl a moment later.

“You know what I am going to say Luna, I’ve been saying it for over a year now…” the other voice went on.

“I don’t want to hear- “Luna began loudly toward the mirror, though she appeared to interrupt herself.

“Celestia has betrayed you. Forsaken your friendship and stolen what is rightfully yours!” Luna shouted in the other voice toward the mirror.

The alicorn shot up from her bed, kicking what was left of it away as she approached the mirror aggressively, looking down at her own reflection.

“She has not… She… she was just angry. We both were. She isn’t aware of how lonely I get when she neglects…” Luna’s voice faltered. “She still loves me, she’s my sister.”

“Loves you?” The other voice scoffed indignantly. “And how has she shown that love as of late?”

…

“Nothing? I thought as much. But tell me Luna, what is Celestia to you?”

“She’s my sister; She’s always been my older sister…”

“She was not just your sister, she’s supposed to be your friend! Or are you forgetting that each of you bore three elements of harmony, binding you by the magic of friendship?”

“She is my friend…”

“Was your friend… until she betrayed that friendship!”

“She has not-“

“What elements did Celestia bare?”

“Kindness… Generosity and Magic.”

“Where was the kindness in Celestia’s harsh words just now, or the past year?” The deeper voice challenged. “Where is her generosity when she hoards the love of your subjects for herself? She is busy being kind and generous to everyone else and puts you last, if she cares at all!”

…

“But what she has done is far more sinister than forsaking your friendship. She knows full well the burden of immortality. She knows she is the only one who can alleviate the loneliness of long life for you”

…

“And you know what she does? She abandons you to suffering, knowing full well that nigh unbearable pain. All in favor of gorging herself on the love of those who also turned their backs on you!”

“Why… why would she do this to me?” Luna’s gazed drifted to the floor, her eyes held shut as a few tears began to stream.

“You know what is vile about all of this? Celestia knows exactly what she is doing yet she blames you for it!” Nightmare proclaimed.

“No, she was just angry. She-“

“She has known you for centuries, she knows you better than anypony else on this entire planet. She knows exactly how you’d feel in this situation – there is no denying that she knows she is causing you pain.” Nightmare spat in disgust. “ All of this is orchestrated on her part. She has stabbed you in the flank, and is now smiling as she twists the dagger!”

“She… she does know me well after being with me… being my sister… for countless years. She does know the pain she is causing me”

“And the only reason she doesn’t stop causing you pain is because she is doing it on purpose!” Nightmare argued. “I know you don’t want to believe it Luna. But remember one thing, you bore the elements of honesty, loyalty and laughter. Which means I bear those same elements. So when I say Celestia has betrayed you, you know I am telling the truth....

“... You know I am being honest.” Luna’s face produced a contorted, almost vindictive, smile, despite the river of tears streaming down her face.

“I have been betrayed….” Luna whispered her agreement. “Celestia loves me no longer.”

“Indeed, I’m glad you realize it now.” The deeper voice went on as Luna smiled to her reflection once more. “But alas, Luna. I have a confession to make. Over the past year I’ve been influencing Celestia’s dreams, trying to get her to remember her love for you… but she has it no more. That’s how I am so certain of her ill intent. Celestia’s recent coldness and aloofness is merely a product of her true feelings, and her true feelings alone…”

“If that is how she feels, then she should just be honest with me and say it!” Luna retorted angrily. Her emotions stopping her from even considering the possibility that this ‘Nightmare Moon’ may have been manipulated Celestia’s dreams in order to make the white alicorn more abrasive with Luna.

However, it didn’t get past Dexter.

“She’s a politician, the truth is rarely something she entertains.” Nightmare explained. “Besides, honesty belongs to you…”

Luna then said something that was hardly a whisper, nearly inaudible to herself.

“Yes!” The deeper voice proclaimed. “Say it louder Luna!”

“I HATE HER!” Luna shouted in her Canterlot voice, loud enough to crack the broken mirror before her even further. The invisible colt hanging for the chandeliers winced before wrapping a free hoof over his ears.

“Yes, Luna!” Luna smiled into the mirror. “Now you see what I am? I am just the manifestation of the hate in your heart! But now that you’ve openly acknowledged me, I feel like I am really meeting you for the first time! It’s great! Now that you’ve truly accepted me...

"I’ll never leave.”

“I cannot let this betrayal stand!” Luna declared. “I must seize what is rightfully mine, and see to it that Celestia is punished for her crimes against me!”

“And you haven’t!” Luna smiled viciously again, crueler than anything Dexter had seen before. “Over the past five months I have been hard at work in the dreamscape, and in issuing orders through you…”

“What… what have you been doing?”

“What have WE been doing,” The other voice corrected. “And I’ll gladly tell you. I’ve been preparing to take back what is rightfully ours. ” She declared. “I’ve been moving ponies’ loyal lunar guards into critical positions of influence, while rallying our guards through the dreamscape. They are almost ready for what needs to be done.”

“How long have you been doing this?”

“WE have been doing this long enough!” Nightmare laughed. “Everything will be ready in just a few more days… then we shall tear down the filthy sun-loving monarchy Celestia has built for herself! We shall right the wrongs that have been committed against us, and bring justice and a love of the night to all our subjects!”

“But our subjects will not let go of their love for the sun easily. ” Luna agreed.

“We both know there is only one cure for a sun-loving face…” Luna smiled. However, despite the smile on her face, her eyes grew wide in fear, starting to shake her head back and forth.

“No… We can’t do that.” Luna whispered. “Taking over is one thing… but-”

“That’s not all Luna,” The voice warned, causing Luna to smile once more.

“No… I still love my sister.”

“Luna… you know what I am going to say…” The other voice began sweetly. “There is no other way…”

“NO!” Luna begged.

“Celestia has a sun-loving face! ” Both voice now seemingly merged, producing a strange echo effect that caused another shiver down Dexter’s spine .

Luna thrashed, seemingly fighting an invisible force holding her to face the mirror.

“You want this.” Luna declared with a sinister grin. “You’ve wanted this from the bottom, deepest, darkest corner of your heart. And that’s why you can’t resist me, because you truly want this.

“And I’m going to see to it that you get it!”

The alicorn brought her head back before letting loose a spine chilling laugh. The laugh was a cross between sinister guffawing and a hysterical sob, blended perfectly. In the end, Dexter couldn’t tell if she was actually laughing or crying. Her mouth was twisted into an ominous grin while her eyes were pained and streaming tears.

Either way, that was the last straw. Dexter didn’t care about Nightmare Moon, he didn’t care about proving anyone or anything right or wrong about her existence.

The only thing the colt wanted was to the heck out of that room.

Which is why he nearly had a heart attack when the battery powering his cloak began flashing a low energy warning.

The last thing he needed was to become visible, there was no doubt this this ‘thing’ in Luna’s chambers with him would smash him to a paste instantly.

Dexter looked around for something to break his fall, or help him down silently. Luna’s onslaught had left the remains of a dresser spread out on the floor beneath him.

He was slowly lowering himself onto the mass of cloth and debris below when the small chain holding the chandelier broke with a snap.

Dexter fell to the floor with a thump as the chandelier hit the floor with a crash. Convinced he was good as dead, the colt froze where he had fallen, looking up with baited breath.

Luna had stopped laughing the moment she heard the chandelier hit the floor, and was now staring at it with two wide eyes. Her pupils were the size of pinpricks, and were unnaturally small for the extremely low light levels.

The colt was nearing a panic at this point, the dark alicorn had already proven to have remarkable senses. He slowly rose, happy to find that Luna’s eyes were not tracking him.

After a few tentative moments of silence, Dexter slowly began backing away before turning out of the bedroom and heading for the chamber doors.

“No Luna…” The deeper voice began again, causing Dexter to pause. “I’m not causing you to hear hoof-steps, nor the sound of breathing…”

“No Luna, don’t get up...I’ll go see who it is.”

Dexter froze mid-step, catching the breath in his mouth.

He slowly turned his head, craning his neck to peer behind him. The dark alicorn was now standing in the doorway to her bedroom, except it wasn’t Luna anymore.

She had a set of dangerously sharp teeth inside a vicious grin, her eyes had become reptilian or cat-like. The alicorn now stood much taller, rivalling Celestia in height. But worst of all, she was staring in Dexter’s direction.

“You know… it’s not polite to eavesdrop on somepony. It’s a crime.” The alicorn said, walking further out of the bedroom as she let her gaze drift around the room, searching for her prey. Her eyes passed the invisible colt without so much as a blink. “And I’m afraid you’ve seen something I cannot afford to let anypony see…”

Author's Note:

I'm sorry! I know that was a cliffhanger (and I always try to avoid them) but I honestly didn't mean to end the chapter there. (I already have about another 15K words written for what happens next, but I cut it off for sake of time, size, and organization.)

But despite the cliffhanger I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. I also revised chapter 4 (disbelief), for those of you who wanted to see that chapter re-worked.

Credit to NASA for the awesome space photos!

I'd like to give a thank you to those who made some art for this story. Here's a sample from Lisaboa-

Apparently some of you really liked that scene from last chapter. (You guys who made the art are awesome, thanks again!)
You can find it and the other art in the blog here: Link
I also want to thank redandready45 for starting the TV tropes page (happened a while ago).

Comments

[RenegadeAlias]

First POST!!!

I forgot to add, I am hoping to update the side story every week with 5k word chapters until it is finished. I already have a lot of it written.

[DreadedCandiru2]

EEEP!!!!!!!

It's not just Nightmare Moon he's seen. It's Celestia being an unsympathetic jerk. When he gets back, he's going to have a different complaint. He'll stop talking about magic being fake and START talking about Sunbutt being a Stalinist jerkass who rewrote history to salve her own conscience. Given who present-day Celestia is, she'll accept his hatred and love it.

[Lexiebommel10]

sees on fetured box
instantly clicks

"HOLY FUCK IT UPDATED"

squee

[Philosophysics]

OUTSMART HIM! SOMEBODY! ANYBODY!

Dexter needs to get outsmarted in a game of wits.

And the other person is just like:

Sorry I was lying about lying.

[Philosophysics]

6516691 I hope to see somebody connect to him and be a rival.

A better rival than Mandrake.

Kind of like the kind of rival who casually infiltrates your home for a cup of coffee while declaring his challenge to you is tomorrow and leaves chocolates as apology.

[DominiusTWD]

yay! and that picture is so adorable!

[Cracked Egg]

rulonbrown.com/tipjar/tipjar.jpg

HERE YOU GO~!

Anyway, terribly sorry I couldn't edit the chapter any.

I'm useless. :(

EDIT: MAYBE I'M NOT SO USELESS.

“You, or at least your underlings, make exaggerated claims about you.” Dexter glanced at Twilight. “Particularly the claim that you have can move celestial objects.”

you can move*

Fixed.

[RenegadeAlias]

My fic has 145 current readers, but the clop fic with only 20 total readers is still above me on the feature box.

[NightShadowJ]

I feel like there was a hint in here about Celestia being a changeling (or having their characteristics). She's taking all the love of the subjects, and engineering it so they all dislike Luna (or prefer Celestia over her). Celestia is the ultimate changeling :O

[Misdirection01]

Dexter is such an insufferable dick, I'd almost forgotten. Nice update.

[Skalula7]

MOAR!!
Pls

[Sora2455]

6516893
Didn't the chapter hint that NM has been engineering Celestia's dreams to make her more abrasive -> Luna more likely to listen to her?

[RenegadeAlias]

6516965

Yes, thank you for noticing! The way that appeared to be flying over everyone's head, I almost thought no one cared about it.

Nightmare Moon was influencing Celestia's dreams (basically giving her bad dreams to make her more irritable AND make her predisposed to being a jerk to Luna.) As the story hinted, Nightmare had been doing so for some time now. Luna is oblvious to the fact that this entity called 'Nightmare' is driving a wedge between herself and Celestia, while using the situation to [make Luna more open her influence.]

[The mike]

new chapter like: SSSHIIIEEEEEEEEEEETT
Fuck church, I'll read this first.... I'm going to hell anyways

[RenegadeAlias]

6516987
Whoa...
Sad fact is... i missed church today too - but thats because of car problems.
I know my fic is good but don't... lose your religion over it! (Pun intended)

... I should feel bad.
Get back to Church Boy! You Need Jesus!

[SvenFoxx]

Oh. Oh, this story is going to be good.

[GuardianofRoin]

“Thank goodness, it’s about time!” Spike whined, dragging his tiny hands down his face as he took in the morning sky.

Twilight rolled her eyes before glancing back at the small dragon. “Our visit to the school only took thirty minutes, Spike.”

“Yeah, I know. It just feels like it’s been—” Spike began counting claws on his hand, “—six months or something…”

Spike, though it was well done, leave the metahumor to Pinkie

[onlyanorthernsong]

ITS ALIIVEEEEEEEE!

[shinikage]

6516691 the link for the fanart doesnt work

[Mix-up]

Awesome chapter and even better then the last one. It was worth the wait all this time and I can't wait to see the next one. I like how you when to explain who Luna's decent to Nightmare Moon happened, and your explanation is probably the best that I have seen on the site that doesn't make Luna sound like she had soddenly had a tamper tamper tantrum over her owe insecurities and that the Nightmare exploit the rift that was create by Celestia's taking center stage in the kingdoms attention and relegated her sister to the unsavory tasks.
I am looking forward to ear the next chapter from you and please that your time your story has gained a lot of quality for this.

I wander if Dexter is going to be force to help Nightmare Moon conquest?
I am surprised that Luna did not just moved the moon just for a childish display of prof of her power.

[NightShadowJ]

6516965 I noticed that. But the chapter also mentions that this was Celestia and Luna's plan. Now Luna's having second thoughts, and Celestia's decided to ignore Luna's feelings on the subject and keep with the plan - the plan for Celestia to be the princess in the spotlight, the one to be loved and worshipped by all, while Luna is the lesser (assumed by the masses to be weaker, and less of a paragon of virtues and more of a pony who wields 'dark' powers and is Celestia's opposite, this is corroborated by the Nightmare Moon myth in the show) princess who is to be disliked and feared by all (this is good cop, bad cop, at its finest).

Now, Nightmare Moon has manipulated Celestia, sure - but it's still Celestia who is saying what she's said to Luna, and it's Celestia who is ignoring Luna's feelings on the subject. There isn't much one could do to cause a complete personality or belief change in a person by covertly manipulating their dreams, yeah?

EDIT: I forgot to add, but the hint that I was mentioning and the one that you mentioned are both true, I believe. Now remember, I'm not saying Celestia is a changeling, it's a near baseless accusation, but she is doing something I'd go so far as to say is a changeling's wet dream - that is, ruling a country of the most loving beings on Earth, and those loving beings love and worship her so much that they believe her divine (I'd say she's a demigod in canon or a powerful sorcerer with immortality, but meh), and she has a dark counterpart (Luna) that is less liked and is considered the villain. It's good cop, bad cop. Celestia is the loving and kind ruler (who everyone else loves), Luna is the intimidating and feared ruler (who no one loves, but is respected).

[Bast]

That was freaking glorious and I loved it

[Sora2455]

6517067
You can make someone cranky and irritable by denying them sleep.
You can make someone paranoid and unsympathetic by giving them nightmares.

Yes, this was the plan.
Yes, it was Celestia who said those things of her own volition.

But she's about to spend the next millennium regretting them dearly. Cut her a little slack.

[Pause]

6516891

The last 3 slots are reserved for stories that have already been featured in the past while the top 7 are for stories featured for the first time.

Assuming you didn't know this already but if you did then shame on me.

[EverfreeSparkle]

Dexter may have just bit off more than he can chew... Assuming things without data to back it up is never a good idea, especially when a few things you took for granted have changed and some new laws of physics seems to have made themselves known. Now, his confidence that he is right about Luna has backfired.

[catdisctomato]

I can't wait to see what you have in store for us after the long wait. Good chapter.

[EverfreeSparkle]

6517009 If I had a religion, I would choose you fic over it any day. I know for a fact I would not say this if I was actually religious. These two statements contradict.

[Moongaze14]

I'm so happy to see this story again. The humor is gold with the CMC, Spike, Twilight, and Luna laughing at Dexter's drag photos. I also enjoyed the astrology competition between Dexter and Luna, especially when Luna gets huggy when Dexter shows "fascination" to her night sky. Still, I feel sad for Luna I'm this chapter. Her reaction to Dexter telling her that he doesn't believe in her for acting like a thug to get information, her conflict with Celestia in the past, and the manipulations from Nitmare were very painful to watch. It shows that you know how to hit the feels. Anyway, I hope to see more of the next chapter and the side story. BTW, I need to ask a couple of questions just to understand how the story will progress. Is the side story updating every week? Also, will the next chapter come soon (you implied that you had other 15K words)?
Forgot to add, that art with Apple Bloom and Dexter was very cute and funny.

[Betoran]

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG! UPDATE! ME LOVE U!

[fangdrive]

6516891
It happens man. It happens. Great story btw. Can't wait for the next chapter.

[SCP049]

“Why so serious?”

[JEP1996]

What type of Grade A bullshit is that!?!?!? How the fuck does Dexter build a suit that has that type of power consumption???? It makes no sense! for all purposes that was a stealth mission and he fucking failed the one cardinal rule! Don't bring faulty tech!!!!!

[NightShadowJ]

6517082 Whoa, I'm not angry at Celestia or anything. We don't even know her actual mindset throughout all of this - only Dexter's, and what we can see of Luna's. If it's a plan that she and Luna began, and if it's been working, then I have no problem with her wanting to continue it, and being unhappy with Luna for complaining about it.

But, Celestia DEFINITELY has not been having nightmares. If that had been occurring, she'd have INSTANTLY spoken to Luna about it. After all, Luna's supposed to protect ponies' dreams, yeah? Honestly, it's a bit of a plothole, we all know it's a plot device by Renegade to (sort of) excuse Celestia's actions towards her sister in this chapter. Not that I mind. It's a tiny plothole, and the story's still great.

But because this plot device most definitely would NOT make Celestia act the way she did to Luna in this chapter, there's either something else going on, or this is just how Celestia is - after all, this is a fanfic, we haven't seen Celestia in modern times with Dexter yet, so for all we know in this story Celestia is a changeling queen, or a tyrant (as Dexter accuses her of being). We can't say that she's a direct mirror of her canon counterpart in the show (especially without seeing her in this story), now can we?

Bah. The Nightmare, evil it may be, has some good points in this chapter when it's convincing Luna to hate Celestia.

[HopeForTheFew]

Great chapter! Took a little while to get out, but it was well worth the wait!

[Drails]

6517305

Dexter didn't build it. Quadraplex did. Hence the faulty tech.

[theanonymousbrony]

“But… These pictures have the greatest quality I’ve ever seen.” A bewildered Twilight reexamined the photos. “I just don’t understand how you could get photos like these as an amateur…”

Strong words coming from a grown-up who has to depend on an eight year old to solve a math problem.

“Thou have won an opportunity many wish for,” Luna grinned smugly. “Thou will have the privilege of… celebrating Nightmare Night with ourselves and Pipsqueak.”

Now wait a minute, I thought he only had to do that if he lost. If having him celebrate Nightmare Night was part of the plot, then why not just let him use? It's like in a telltale game when there's options that result in the same outcome; why bother having options if it'll just result in the same outcome? I'm just saying, it feels a little forced.
Also, if Dexter didn't want anyone to see those humiliating pictures of himself wearing makeup and dresses, then why didn't he just tear them to shreds? Hell, when he was asking Quadraplex to teleport pictures of stars, why didn't he also tell her to teleport the embarrassing pictures back to his lab so that way he can be able to shred them without anyone else seeing them? I mean Dexter is suppose to be a "boy genius" after all, so wouldn't he know that destroying the pictures would be much smarter than keeping them intact for anyone to stumble upon?

“You? Care?” Dexter grumbled dismissively. “Last time I checked I never programmed you to care.”

Really, is that why she just said that she cares about you? Also, if Dexter had never in anyway intended for Quadraplex to feel any emotions towards, then why did he program her that way to begin with?! Again, he's this "boy genius" who can create powerful weapons, robots, and a time machine, and yet he can't even do something as simple as programing his computer to not have any emotions towards him? It's like a race of aliens not being able to go through a wooden door; it just doesn't make sense!
Also, near the end of the episode where Dexter and his whole family had to fight a giant monster together, he used a device to erase his parents memories of his lab. If he's so concerned about these ponies getting on to him, then why doesn't he just make another one and use it to erase Twilight's, Spike's, and Luna's suspisions of him?
All of this might be difficult for person of average intelligence, but it should be a complete cakewalk for a "boy genius"!

[Drails]

Awesome chapter, loved it to the end. I can't wait for the next update. This fic makes me happy!

Also, I'm going to wonder: How will Applejack react to when she can't find Dexter to put him to bed since he decided to time travel?

Will this be when Twilight, Luna and Applejack start to collaborate and work things out.

[zanthimos]

Pride goeth before the fall.

This chapter was so awesome, so intense and quite a bit dark. Imma have to break my diet and get some Taco Bell for this...

[RazDelacroix]

I was all geared and hyped up ready to go with typing up a grand and most eloquent commentary regarding the latest chapter of Dexter's plight in Equestria.

Then I saw the best picture of Applebloom and Dexter ever. Now, all I can say is...

I SHIP APPLEDEX! Just...too cute. Thank you!

[redandready45]

Your welcome, and I'm glad your back.

It appears Dexter has discovered too late that in his neurotic quest for the truth he's played with fire. I hope he doesn't get burned.

I think trying to block Luna's dream will be a very bad idea, since it would mean he is disrupting Luna's talent with his science. And disrupting talents, as we know, is very dangerous.

[ZephyrStrife]

I feel like there's a DexBloom ship in there somewhere... AND IT'S ADORABLE!

[mapu]

Great chapter. Can't wait for more.

[Smoker]

Ftr, until a mech comes and squashes rarity and her boutique into the ground, I'm hating this story. I have a phobia of that exact scenario is all.

[Night_Frost]

great to get another chapter, hope the wait for the next one isn't as long

[Rustybuckets]

I love you

... for making this fanfiction.

[QWERTY]

You know, you should actually keep the princess fight completely canon, not for the sake of the story per se, but because whenever anyone has questioned how malicious and annoying Dexter is in this, you always defended it by claiming that that is how he is portrayed in his show. You have made it clear that you are writing as if even the most ridiculous happenings of Dexter's Lab are the headcanon for this story, so should that not also be true for MLP? Seems like a double standard if you're willing to change MLP canon around when it suits you, but not the other source material. An author has to have their integrity, right?
Also, while I had high hopes and it pains me to do so, I'm downvoting this story. I've just grown tired of watching Dexter constantly give the ponies the run-around. It's gotten old and played-out. How you seem to think that Dexter, the boy who can't even keep his idiot sister out of his lab, would be this on top of things in Equestria astounds me. It's not even fun anymore to watch the ponies be fools constantly fooled.
The story has pretty much been like One Piece; entertaining in its own way, but the same basic scenario repeating itself with a different coat of paint for it's entirety. Ponies get evidence/suspicious, Dexter finds out ahead of time and prepares, Dexter get's confronted, Dexter refutes accusations, accusers left looking like idiots. Rinse, lather, repeat.
This is now longer than the first or second books of Harry Potter and looks like it's going to be repeating this formula for the foreseeable future. If he's not going to get caught, why this constant artificial suspense that he will? It's like the whole story has been built around Dexter constantly outsmarting the MLP cast, and there has been very little progress made towards a real story arc because of it. The changelings seem more like a tool to facilitate this loop than their own part of the plot. They're there so Dexter can fight them and subsequently risk getting exposed.
If they ever manage to figure it out, I hope Twilight laughs in everyone's skeptical face... Though, I'm sure you'll just have Dexter wipe everyone's memories anyway when that happens since, you know, he did that to his parents. Actually, if he doesn't do it, it wouldn't make sense since Dexter, according to the author, both has the means and mindset to do this. He was willing to neuralize his own flesh and blood, so I don't see why he wouldn't do it to ponies he hardly knows.
I suppose stating a different anatomy could be the answer, but that's flimsy at best. Dexter's a genius who's already cracked magic. I'm sure it would only take him a minute or two to adjust his mind-wiping tech accordingly.

Edit:
This comment has gotten me blocked and a very hostile PM. Jeez, and I thought I was being reasonable with my criticism too, but according to Renegade, my comments have no merit and are ruining the reading experience for everyone else. Didn't know my words had such influence over the masses.
... Donate all your money to the Them's Fightin Words Indiegogo campaign, sheeple. It needs your savings.
THE CONCH-er-QWERTY HAS SPOKEN!!!

[Qussar]

Love the flow, blazed through 17k of words without noticing. Awesome job, maybe dexter will finally accept "magic, ain't gotta explain shit" when approaching equestria logic

[belnett]

I know it said the nightmare's voice was lower, and it's the wrong universe, but during the entire chapter, I was imagining nightmare moon's voice as HIM. It fit surprisingly well.

[Burnasius]

Does this mean Dexter finally believes, with now a solid evidence that not only is he in a different universe that what they are saying... And what he is seeing is real enough?

[Creed Miles]

By this chapter I am infering that the canon time travel in this fiction is immutable meaning that Luna seems to recognize dexter because he went back in
Time.
Essentially if someone goes back in time then there actions are part of history and were meant to happen. No matter what he does Dexter literally cannot change anything in the past because his actions in the past cause his present.
For a better explains toon just look up time travel in wikipedia