The night was beautiful and so was Quirky. Once again, she had finished her rounds early and had stopped by for a feeding, and to also get pumped to refill the milk resevoirs in the fridge.
Quirky had been quite shocked by the new foal. She fussed and fawned over it, in love with it right away, and doted over both Shortbread Cookie and the new foal.
Feeding was a bit problematic though, as the new foal was a nipper as predicted. She liked to chew as much as suckle, and her tiny needle-like fangs caused no end of suffering for Quirky, who endured it all with good natured grumbling.
Noctilucent sat close by as Quirky fed them in the common room, sprawled on a pile of pillows. Shady Patch had opted to stay indoors with Quirky rather than be outside with the other foals, curious about the lunar pegasus foal.
“You look very protective Noctilucent,” Quirky observed, her tone serious and not at all teasing. “Look at you and the way you are sitting. You are not slouching or moping or any of those things. You’re handsome when you are attentive.”
Noctilucent did not reply, but he did blush slightly.
“And now you have two foals to look after. There is something about a pony that isn’t afraid to be a father,” Quirky quipped.
Noctilucent felt something tugging inside of his mind. Thoughts began to tumble. His own father had been absent. And now, even with his life as screwed as it was, he was now technically the father of two foals, at least in deed, though not quite yet in the legal sense. But that would come later. The plan was taking shape in his mind. He had thought about a lot of things after his long talk with Dr. Lethe earlier. She was outside with Holly and the foals, enjoying the night.
“Quirky, would you like to-”
“I’d love to go on a date with you,” Quirky interrupted. “We can go to the diner. But only if Shady Patch can come along.”
Noctilucent thought of Holly’s words earlier. “Shady Patch, would you like to come with us?” he asked.
The zebra foal nodded but said nothing.
“Then once the foals are in bed, and the little ones are tucked away, the three of us will go and have a nice time together,” Noctilucent announced.
“That is very nice of you,” Shady Patch said in a small voice.
“A lot of ponies aren’t too kind towards zebras right now,” Quirky said. “He’s been catching a lot of heat for things he isn’t responsible for.”
“You are just another foal to me,” Noctilucent said to Shady Patch. “And I like foals as I think you can see.”
“Cactus Blossom says you are just a big foal yourself,” Shady said, looking down at the floor.
“She’s right,” Noctilucent replied.
Shady looked up at the pegasus with a quizzical stare. “That doesn’t bother you that she said that?” he asked.
“Should it?” Noctilucent replied.
“I dunno, don’t ask me,” Shady said, still looking Noctilucent in the eye. “Quercus is a big foal most of the time as well.”
Quirky giggled at Shady’s words and smiled a broad beaming smile.
“I really love her though so I can’t complain,” Shady admitted in a low whisper, still staring up at Noctilucent.
“Would it bother you if I dated Quirky?” Noctilucent asked.
“Look, in case you haven’t noticed, I am a foal. I don’t get much of a say about what adults do,” Shady replied.
“Sure you do. You have feelings. And I don’t want to intrude or make you uncomfortable,” Noctilucent said. “Would make it very hard to be friends with Quirky if you didn’t like me.”
Shady Patch shifted slightly on his haunches, and continued to stare up at Noctilucent, his face puzzled. Saying nothing, he extended one foreleg and offered his hoof.
Noctilucent raised his own hoof and gently bumped it against Shady’s, a silent agreement made between the two. On the outside, Noctilucent looked calm and composed. On the inside, he was a seething roiling mass of nerves and jitters that was barely holding everything together. This was almost unheard of behaviour for him and he had no idea what he was doing.
“Aw, both of you are so sweet,” Quirky quipped. She winced from a particularly painful nip on the teat and bit her lip to keep from crying out.
“So why do you like foals so much?” Shady asked.
“I don’t know. I think maybe they're my calling. Hard to say,” Noctilucent replied.
“Cactus Blossom says you are the most patient adult she’s ever met,” Shady Patch said. “You know, you actually scare her a little bit.”
“Do I?” Noctilucent responded.
“She says you’re not normal,” Shady stated. “Even Holly loses her temper, and Holly is one patient pony.”
“And this scares her?” Noctilucent asked.
“She says she is waiting for you to get angry. She thinks that when you do it is going to be like volcano or something,” Shady answered.
“Oh,” Noctilucent replied.
“It is okay to get angry with foals you know,” Shady said. “We do stupid stuff and we need to be scolded.”
“I just can’t see the point about being mean when it happens,” Noctilucent admitted. “My grandmother was often cruel with her responses. I know how it feels. I didn’t like it being done to me, I really don’t want to do it to others.”
“Yeah, but sometimes, we need the scolding,” Shady said in embarrassed tones. “Look. There is a lot of times I know I have messed up and Quirky doesn’t scold me because she wants to be my friend, and it makes me feel even worse because I know I did something rotten and I deserve to be scolded. It would be a relief to be scolded. Just to hear it and get it out of the way so I can stop scolding myself.”
“Fascinating,” Noctilucent said. “You and Graves must spend a lot time talking.”
“How did you know that?” Shady asked.
“Just a hunch,” the pegasus offered.
“Quirky was talking about you in the mirror to herself and making smoochy smoochy faces,” Shady said in a teasing tone.
“Shady! When I catch you!” Quirky snapped, stuck on her pile of pillows.
“Oh,” Noctilucent said, his white spots rapidly turning pink.
“Are you going to try to kiss her tonight?” Shady asked, his own white stripes turning a bit pink.
“I hadn’t planned on it,” Noctilucent confessed.
“Well, why not?” Shady asked insistently.
“Well, because you are going to be there and I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable,” Noctilucent said, making up a quick believable excuse.
“Shady!” Quirky warned.
“You have my permission. I wouldn’t mind. She needs to stop moping,” Shady said, smiling slightly and his white stripes turning even pinker. “She gets into these moods and it hurts me to see her in them. Reminds me too much of my mother.”
“Shady, you don’t even want to know what I am going to do to you later!” Quirky threatened.
“See, this is what I mean. Foals need scolding. I know I deserve this. I am not the least bit upset about it,” Shady commented.
The white unicorn was now very pink herself and her breath came in snorts.
“I think you and I are going to be friends, Shady Patch,” Noctilucent said.
Two ponies and a zebra walked down the road, their breath visible in the cold night air, moving slowly and silently through the dark. Not much was being said now, all three of them looked thoughtful. Noctilucent thought about the two foals he had taken responsibility for and what it meant long term. Quirky thought about Shady Patch, who she had taken responsibility for, and what it meant long term. Shady Patch was thinking about something else entirely. He wanted Quirky happy.
Shady walked slightly ahead of the two, his legs having to work double time to stay ahead of them, but he managed. He didn’t want them feeling as though they were being watched.
The trio finally made it to their destination, the diner, and made their way inside. They were seated in a booth, with Quirky and Shady sitting on one side, and Noctilucent sitting on the other.
“Things are weird and quiet,” Shady observed in a low voice.
“Yes they are,” Noctilucent agreed.
“A little zebra had to run his mouth,” Quirky muttered.
“I thought that first kiss was supposed to clear up all the weirdness between us,” Noctilucent said, staring down at the table.
“And then things got weirder,” Quirky said in her own defense. “Here I am having a few daydreams about wanting to start a family, and here you are starting a family all by your lonesome, no mare required, and I am the one teat feeding them and getting attached to them and then a little mouthy zebra has to go and reveal what I was doing in private.”
Shady hung his head.
“Wait, what?” Noctilucent said.
“Look, forget about it, this doesn’t need to be any weirder,” Quirky said dismissively. “I shouldn’t have said what I said. It just slipped out.”
“I feel really stupid, of course you would feel some attachment to the foals,” Noctilucent mumbled self consciously.
“I thought I could just be a good pony, help out a little bit, do the right thing, I didn’t know I would grow so fond of Shortbread Cookie so quickly. Or you.”
“Me?” Noctilucent asked.
“Well, she hangs around your neck. You are always kissing her. Being sweet. That gets a mare’s attention you know. Nothing gets our reproductive itch going like watching a good father at work,” Quirky huffed.
The waitress stood near the table smiling.
“One banana milkshake, black bean refritos, flatbread, queso dip, guacamole, a giant strawberry lemonade, and I think that will do it for me. Noctilucent, what do you want to drink?” Quirky said.
“Can I get a lemonade with no sugar?” Noctilucent asked.
“Sure, we can get you some fresh squeezed lemon juice and water,” the waitress replied. “Want some lime juice with that?”
“Please,” Noctilucent replied.
“Oh that’s icky,” Shady commented.
“Care to try our stuffed habanero puffs? It is a habanero stuffed with mushroom bits and cream cheese, dipped in cornbread batter, and deep fried in peanut oil,” the waitress offered.
“I’ll take a dozen of those,” Quirky replied.
“A dozen?” Noctilucent asked.
“Four each,” Quirky responded.
“I’ll be back shortly,” the waitress said, departing to drop their order off in the kitchen.
“So you like me because I appear to be a good father?” Noctilucent questioned.
“Well, yeah. I mean, look at it from my perspective. I have Shady. And I am single. Do you think for one moment I am going to invite somepony into my life that is going to be rotten towards Shady?” Quirky replied.
Noctilucent couldn’t help but feel that this was a different Quirky than the one he had previously taken on a date. This one wasn’t so happy go lucky. She was practical and shrewd. She was careful and reserved. And she wasn’t nearly as jovial.
“You work in an orphanage for crying out loud. You look after foals. How could I not feel just a little hopeful when I look at you?” Quirky queried.
“I am only there because I… I made a terrible mistake and now I am paying for it. I am being honest when I say this, but I don’t want to say what I’ve done,” Noctilucent admitted.
“But Luna put you there. She trusts you with those foals. That means something,” Quirky insisted.
“Luna is very protective of her foals,” Shady Patch agreed. “We’ve talked. She calls me one of her special foals,” he added.
Noctilucent let the realisation of why sink in.
“So you have something I kinda want for myself,” Quirky admitted. “I didn’t know that I would get so attached so quickly. And now there are two.”
“I didn’t know I was going to fall in love either,” Noctilucent confessed.
After several moments of silence, he added: “With Shortbread Cookie I mean… uh, well, you get the idea.”
Quirky looked at Noctilucent and blinked several times.
“She’s made me want to get my life together. All of the foals actually, the whole orphanage. I don’t know what I want to do with my life exactly, I don’t know what I want to do for me as a pony, but I have applied for financial aid and applied to take lessons in foal psychology through the mail from the University of Las Pegasus,” Noctilucent confessed, heaving out a deep breath and puffing out his cheeks after he did so. He hadn’t told anypony yet, and it felt really good to tell somepony what he had done.
“You did what?” Quirky said, her mouth dropping open.
Shady reached up with his foreleg and gently pushed Quirky’s mouth shut. “Princess Luna told me she wants me to talk with Dr. Lethe. She’s a foal psychologist,” Shady Patch mentioned as he lowered his foreleg back down to the table. He looked up at Quirky who was still stunned.
“Are you for real?” Quirky asked.
“I had a moment while I was in the shower. I just made a really poor plan and then I ran with it. Never done anything like this before. Usually I don’t do anything on a whim, I plan everything, I don’t like being spontaneous, but I made a plan in the shower, went to the library, put in the paperwork, and now I am waiting. No idea if I will be accepted or not. I’m scared to death, I’m nervous about saying anything because I have this fear of being rejected or just failing after I start it and looking like a total loser in front of the first mare I’ve felt anything for in a long time, and I don’t want my life to become any more messed up,” Noctilucent blurted, his words coming out in a long stream because of panic.
“Woah, wait up, you have feelings for me?” Quirky asked, seizing upon the words that were of the most interest to her.
“Well, kinda, I just want to know you. You didn’t reject me or put me down or say I am useless or leave me feeling like I am less than a stallion,” Noctilucent confessed.
“I understand,” Quirky said, falling silent.
“You like Quirky?” Shady asked.
“Well, kinda, I sort of want to know her better,” Noctilucent said to the zebra. “Ever had a crush kiddo?”
“No,” Shady replied. “But if I did fall in love it would be with someone like Quirky,” the zebra admitted.
Quirky slipped a foreleg around the zebra foal and squeezed him close.
The waitress showed up at the table with a tray, unloaded her tray, smiled broadly at the group, and nodded. “The bill is paid for by the way. Royal expense account, courtesy of Princess Luna. Enjoy everything!” She bounced way with the tray, babbling happily to another set of customers not too far away.
“I had no idea that Princess Luna set up an account,” Noctilucent said in surprise, his tone low and almost shocked.
Shady ignored all else and began to work on his banana milkshake, trying to suck the thick creamy shake through the straw, which was almost impossible.
Quirky waited on the habanero puffs to cool down and opted instead to go for the flatbread. She loaded it down with refritos and guacamole, rolled it up, and then dipped it in queso. She made an almost erotic face when she bit into it and then moaned in pleasure.
The queso was full of little orange, yellow, and red bits.
Noctilucent began to sweat just looking at it, the orange, yellow, and red bits somewhat familiar. “I’m scared,” he confessed.
“You should be,” Shady said, eyeing the queso. “It’s loaded.”
With a spoon, Noctilucent loaded the refried beans and guacamole onto a piece of flatbread, rolled it up, and dipped it in the queso. He closed his eyes, and took a bite.
He immediately wished he hadn’t.
His whole body felt like the time he had been accidentally blown into a stormcloud. He could feel something writhing around inside of his lips and his tongue. His teeth tingled. The roof of his mouth spontaneously combusted and felt like it had burst into flames. His whole body broke out into a sweat.
And then, he dipped into the hot gooey habanero laden queso again.
This is the self harm I can live with he thought to himself.
“You both are crazy!” Shady Patch exclaimed. “That stuff burns my eyes just from being too close!”
Both ponies began to sniffle as they ate, noses running, eyes watering, both of them sweating so much that trickles of sweat began to dribble down various parts of their bodies.
Noctilucent tried one of the habanero puffs, popping the whole thing into his mouth after blowing on it a few times. He chewed a few times… and then lamented his decisions wholeheartedly. He immediately felt his eyeballs begin to vibrate, his ears started to ring, and his tongue felt as though it was being jammed full of white hot needles.
“These are really good,” Noctilucent whimpered, trying to snort back the snot that threatened to dribble out of his nose.
Quirky tried one and popped into her mouth. She began to pant heavily. To Noctilucent, it was almost sexual. He wondered briefly what his reaction must look like to Quirky.
Upping the ante, Noctilucent dipped a habanero puff into the queso and then jammed it into his mouth.
A few moments later, he let out a whimpering cry and resigned himself to his fate. Tears streamed down his cheeks and he rapped on the table with his hoof, wishing the pain would go away. He sniffled and snorted, huffed and puffed, and then finally tilted his head back and simply tried to keep breathing, which felt almost impossible.
Shady cautiously reached out, took a habanero puff, gobbled it down, and then immediately began to slurp on his milkshake, his eyes instantly bloodshot and his nose began to run. A low cry reverberated in the depth of his throat.
The torture was exquisite.
Nopony could ever quite figure out why some ponies did this to themselves. The other ponies in the diner watched the two ponies torture themselves and shook their heads. They were old, and had forgotten what it was like to take those first stumbling steps into infatuation.
huh, i thoguht they were all under spells that kept them from killing themselves. poppers are simply another form of attempted suicide.
4483741
Lunar pegasi don't manipulate clouds or weather. They manipulate shadow. Some dream walk. They can slip into insubstantial shadowy forms called shadow diving. There are other dark gifts as well.
4487337
Are your lunar pegasi omnivorous, do they just eat fish, or neither? I know some authors justify the teeth that way.
4487394
Fish. Usually. Dumb animals sometimes.
Mares and gentlecolts, I have a new favorite foal.
That date was hot in more ways than one.
I thought Noctilucent was Percieving, but then he explains he has Judging tendencies.
4487509
I agree.
That dinner scene was so cute!
4487536
Guidelines, really...
4487666 Okay.
4487691
I am an INTJ for example, but I am a perceiving perceptive bastard. Sometimes. When it suits me. When there is a need for it.
Mostly, the raised eyebrow and the INTJ sneer is all I need though.
I have no idea what most of those stuff they ate were.
4487710
4487703 That makes sense.
4487712 well, maybe not most, but half of them easy. WTF is refritos, flatbread, queso, guacamole?
4487751
Google is your friend?
4487759 Google is for the weak! Real man complain about their lack of knowledge of foreign cuisine!
4487782
SOYLENT PASTEL IS MADE OF PONIES! PONIES!
4487751 They're mexican dishes or mexican names for things. Flatbread is a kind of bread that's somewhere between tortillas and pizza dough on thickness. Queso is literally spanish for cheese. Guacamole is a dipping sauce that is made from avocados. No idea what exactly the refritos are, but I imagine it has something to do with burritos.
4487796
Refritos... Refried beans.
And flatbread is very native american.
i can well sympathize with Noctilucent. i started out this way with my on again off again love affair with the habanero. thesedays, they just don't seem quite as hot as they used to be. my friends watch in horror when i use hot sauce as dipping sauce for my fries, or pour hot sauce on my burger, or even look them in the eyes and drink it strait.
but i love every eye watering, runny nose, lip tingling, gum burning, numbed tongue, raw throated moment of it.
welcome to the club Noct!
4487796 never ate them, but burrito and tortilla I know.
BTW. Couldn't kudzuhaiku just write 'cheese' if it's basically that? What if I wrote SER? Do he knows what SER is? Do you kudzuhaiku? You don't know what SER is! You can't handle SER!
4487826
As a diabetic, I replaced sugary ketchup wit Sriracha. On EVERYTHING. Not hot at all, but has a nice flavour.
Why would Quirky and Noctilucent torture themselves like that?
4487835
Queso is also a dish. Hot, melted, usually laced with salsa or picante, so it is more than just cheese.
Context I suppose.
4487840 Chill, I'm just messin' with ya.
And 'ser' is just 'cheese' in Polish.
4487840 I thought they usually called that salsa con queso. Then again, I'm an ignorant American, so maybe I should shut up about countries I barely know about . . .
4487872
Salsa con queso
Or just queso. I know if I go to the right sort of restaraunts, and if I ask for queso, I know what they will bring me.
Something hot, runny, and full of chilies.
All of my comments on this chapter and I can't believe I forgot to talk about my first experience with spicy.
So, I was a little kid at the time, and I was eating at a restaurant with the rest of my family. Curiously, I looked up at a row of little bottles (every single bottle was a different kind of hot sauce) and one of them caught my eye; a bottle with the words "ENDORPHIN RUSH" printed on the label.
Me: "Dad, what does 'endorphin' mean?"
Dad: "It's a chemical in your brain that makes you feel good."
Naturally, this encouraged me to reach up and grab the bottle and poured it like ketchup onto my food. When I put it in my mouth . . .
Well, let's just say for a good ten minutes I had serious doubts about the name of that product.
If you're gonna add mood music, put the notes at the top of the chapter: so we actually see them before we start reading.
4487949
D'oh!
Shady Patch, mah zebra.
In other news, the date reminds me of Button Mash's Milkshake Race.
SPICE CONTEST! 1-2-3 GO!
*chomp*
MMMMMMMM!
*chomp*
SO DELICIOUS!
Now add a dash of rainbow...
PLEASE NO!
i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7491804672/h5C76EB41/
Just reading that last bit made my eyes water. Whoof.
4487881 "Salsa con queso" literally translates to "sauce with cheese"
^part of my limited random Spanish knowledge
4488125
I chose integration with my shadow. It made me a stronger person.
oh god! I wish he had kissed her! He better Kiss her in ch.23! Or I swear I'll....I'll.... keep reading.
4488154 No you stop that
*Cough, Cough. Levation, you scrub
Kudz, add a ghost pepper challenge with Quirky and Noc. First one that drinks something loses. (I lasted 27 secs, beating my friends by 6.8 secs)
The conversation with Shady early on just hurt to read.
Kind of liked, but am kind of worried by, the whole hurting with spicy stuff thing. Self-injury doesn't stop there forever simply because it is physically addictive. One builds a tolerance to the endorphins and other chemicals released by most self-harm acts and needs to go further and further to get the same effect. In short, feels like they're setting themselves up, though at least Noctilucent is geased.
4487838
Capsaicin: It is common for people to experience pleasurable and even euphoriant effects from ingesting capsaicin. Folklore among self-described "chiliheads" attributes this to pain-stimulated release of endorphins, a different mechanism from the local receptor overload that makes capsaicin effective as a topical analgesic. In support of this theory, there is some evidence that the effect can be blocked by naloxone and other compounds that compete for receptor sites with endorphins and opiates.
God I love this chapter so much!
I know this is probably a silly question, but could you explain what a persons "shadow" is? I've read a couple of websites with info but I don't quite understand...
in other news, I'm enjoying this so far :) its a really interesting read and its really making me think...
keep up the amazing work
4487759
4489015
Unless you've actually eaten really spicy food, you probably wont get it. Its amazing: your sinuses open up and your tears pour forth in a mass that cascades down your face. Your trying to wipe your face and continue eating while your mouth is simultaneously burning. True, you are a complete mess but you feel amazing.
Its just like getting CS gassed: it sucks while its happening but afterwords you feel like a whole new person.
4490907
All of the big next gen arthritis drugs are coming from capsaicin.
My love of spicy food is part of my own process of pain management. It isn't self harm at all, but self preservation. I need my daily dose of happy chemicals.
4490912
Ha Ha, lol. I think self harm is a bad word for it. How about delayed bliss with a fiery twist?
After reading this chapter I was craving some tiny red peppers from a local Thia restaurant. They do the trick for me every time
4490920
Capsaicin is also proven to fight depression. As in scientifically proven.
And yes, you can get high from peppers.
I once ate a whole raw red savina. I tripped balls for hours. I had some mild hallucinations, auditory static, and felt like I had smoked a bale of fine hash.
Death pepper.
People have died from eating red savinas.
Fun fact! Hot peppers can trigger a DMT release, the chemical the brain releases upon death that makes people see tunnels of light and trip balls. The hottest peppers actually make your brain think it is dying.
4490946 If you think those are bad try a Carolina Reaper....Blue Oyster Cult was wrong when they said don't fear the reaper.