• Member Since 19th Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen Dec 8th, 2015

Cobolt Soundwave


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Starburst and NightLight are trying to get the perfect gift for their mother on mother's day. But what can you get a mother who already has everything she could ever ask for.

The Oc's are not mine, they belong to Kilala97. Go on over there and give her a look, her artwork is amazing.

Picture found here http://th05.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2014/091/f/6/older_by_kilala97-d7chj6y.jpg (Respectively you may click here kilala97.)

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 21 )

Great job with this story. Very cute, and it came out on Mother's day. Great job.

Starburst and Night Light are trying to get the perfect gift for their mother on mother's day. But what can you get a mother who already has everything she could ever ask for?

Come on, man. You have to proofread. Have a little pride in your writing.

-Lumino

Cute, though it could use some technical polish. I'd suggest finding a good proofreader.

4371963 yea some one has been helping me proofread I'll send this in to him in a bit, he's doing some proof reading for another one of my stories right now.

Short, simple, and sweet. Great job!

4372171 Thank you! :twilightblush: I'm getting it edited since I wrote it late at night, but I really wanted to get this out for mother's day. :yay:

I found a typo in this,

They each got about 50 bits a week that they each could d whatever they wanted to with.

You forgot to put an 'o' in here.

Honestly, this is a great fanfic! I've been a fan of Kilala's for a while, but I never pictured someone would a Mother's Day fic with her OC's! I truly look forward to seeing more! :twilightsmile:

4372193 Thanks, yeah I thought so too, I haven't seen a mother's day fic for Kilala's Oc's either.

Oh and you for got the do in your comment too. LOL

:derpytongue2:

4372204 I was just trying to show the typo :twilightsmile:

4371899 I'm sorry:fluttercry: I really wanted it up for mother's day, and I went through it proofreading and missed that, among other things, but it's better now I had some one edit it for me.

Not bad for a first fic. The pacing gets completely speared as there is no real way to tell when the scene moves to the boutique and back, but other than that it was pretty good.

4387575 I swear I put page breaks in. Hmm wierd, thanks for letting me know

this was a pretty enjoyable read. the conversations seemed natural, though now i'm curious as to how they pulled off that kiss that was mentioned.

4553649
This. I must know. I suspect Illusion had a hoof in that.

That is so sweet! Who is there dad anyway?

4940122 The father would be Flash Sentry.

4942141 no offense to the Flash Sentry fans, but the guy had a cardboard personality when we were introduced to him and showed no signs of developing beyond a flat character.

4942294 Eeeehh, I know, but he's paired up with Twilight in Kilala's pairings so, yeah.

This was a sweet story and it fit the theme of Mother's day. I love stories where Twilight has kids. Again, excellent job.

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