this is great wooo! bulkshy for life!

Looks like those lessons from Rarity finally paying off.

Fluttershy and.bulk are so cute together!

All right, this one’s from Fluttershy’s perspective. I was curious regarding how she was written in the previous chapter, so maybe this can answer some questions on my mind.

… “When Bulk reached one hundred” – Add what he reached one hundred of: reps.
… “didn’t mean that didn’t” – ‘that’ should be ‘she’.
… “” – This is actually something I can’t directly quote, as it’s from a previous chapter: The following verbal exchanges are missing from this chapter:

“Fl–Fluttershy?” “Your ta–tail keeps getting in the way!” “It keeps tickling me!”
“Oh! Sorry!” “This any better?”
…
“Hey… a little help?” (Fakes difficulty lifting the weights)
“Sure thing!” (flaps her wings)

… “whether to cross them.” – When ‘whether’ is used, you need to give a decision, meaning two options. As a result, this should be “whether to cross them or not.” Yes, it seems like it speaks for itself, but still, correct grammar is correct grammar!
… “The smiled when she” – ‘The’ should either be ‘She’ or ‘Then’… Likely ‘She’, since starting a sentence with ‘Then’ sounds strange.
… “They both stared at each in a” – I believe ‘other’ should be placed between ‘each’ and ‘in’.

I liked the way this attempted to establish Fluttershy’s reasons for her actions, but the key word there is ‘attempted’: It seemed that she, while occasionally shy, seldom kept to her nature in this chapter. She was mostly trying to get reactions from Bulk Biceps, despite him desperately trying not to give reactions. I feel like Fluttershy being more mentally ‘assertive’ would’ve worked wonders for her character in this chapter, but instead, she seems like she’s just in heat, or doesn’t care much about Bulk as a pony… which is rather out of character for her, or at least, that’s how she seems. It devotes very little to how she feels about Bulk as a pony, compared to how much Bulk’s chapter devotes to his view of Fluttershy.

The extra space that COULD be created with the quotes I’ve recommended to be added, may very well call attention to Fluttershy’s view of Bulk Biceps, and build upon it, which I’d certainly like to see, though at any rate, the story’s been completed already, so it’s unlikely that it would add something new.

Regardless, there’s one chapter left, and I’d like to see this through to the end.

But to be frank, Fluttershy was getting turned on, and there were only a couple of ponies that she’d be comfortable having sex with. She had only known Bulk for a short time, but she knew without a doubt that he was one of them. Not that they had done it yet, but she was definitely having a hard time getting the idea out of her head.

I know that Rainbow and Snowflake are on that list but who else?