Rainbow Dash: Dimension Jumper

by SteelChords

The Human

So, before I even go into who I am, you must know that prior to waking up in the middle of the night to see a cyan pony lying on the ground at the base of the tree in my front yard, I was not a brony. I had friends that were always trying to convince me to watch the show, but I always refused, because I had no time to get addicted to something else. Frankly, they were starting to drive me crazy with all the time they'd spend telling me why I should watch it, and I was starting to hate the show because of it. I'd never seen any of the episodes, any of the YouTube videos, and I'd certainly never heard of any of the characters. My first thought when I saw a cyan pony with a rainbow colored mane and tail lying in my front lawn, was, "Ok, I know beer isn't exactly healthy for me, but I thought it was smoking that caused people to hallucinate. This can't possibly be real!"

It started as a fairly average day. I woke up later than usual, which just meant that I was late for being late. I dragged myself out of bed, put on my work clothes, grabbed an energy drink from the fridge, and walked out to the truck. The drive to work was probably my favorite part of the day.

I always enjoy when I get to drive around to places. It gives me the chance to blare the radio as loud as possible, and jam out to my favorite songs. It's a lot of fun, and since I live in a rather small town, nobody really cares about noise and stuff like that. Everyone's houses are far enough apart from each other that we're free to have parties and get-togethers just about whenever we please, even late at night.

Anyway, I arrived at work late again that morning, and my boss gave me the usual, "Hank, if I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times..." yada yada yada... If he really wanted to fire me, he would've done it by now. He knows just as well as I do that if he fires me, he won't be able to find another employee like me.

You see, even though I show up late to work just about every other day, I'm one of the smartest, hardest working employees there. That's not so as to say that I'm incredibly smart, it's just that the other employees make me look that way a lot of the time.

I took my lunch break around noon, which was rather early for me. I usually tend to clock out for lunch around 1pm or so, but since I wasn't able to grab something quick to eat on my way out the door that morning, I decided to break a little earlier than usual. I went out to my truck, and lowered the tailgate so I could lay my food on it like a table. It was still a little wet from the fast drizzle that had come down a few minutes prior. I'll never understand the weather around where I live.

Anyway, I was eating my lunch out on the tailgate, staring up at the sky for a good while, since there wasn't much else to look at. The dark clouds were still looming overhead, but they were getting blown away pretty quickly. As the sun started to peek back out from it's temporary hiding place, I noticed a faint rainbow start to form. I was never a huge fan of rainbows, but I enjoyed looking at them, and it was always cool to spot one whenever they came around. Unfortunately, they were always really hard to see, and I usually had to squint to make them out.

It seemed that as quick as I saw the rainbow, it disappeared. Out of curiosity, I looked at my watch for a second, and realized that I should probably head back inside and work. My shift wasn't over until 7pm, and I would probably be better off doing some decent work to try and distract myself from the time.

It couldn't come soon enough, but I finally got done with work. It was unusually exhausting, but thankfully, I wouldn't have to drag myself out of bed to go back to it tomorrow. The place I work at closes on Sundays, so I take those days to just sleep in and stay up late.

I made my way back to my truck, and started driving out of the parking lot. Normally there's not a lot of people on the road, but there's always something interesting that happens about once or twice a month that drivers would have to watch for. Whether that be a high speed chase, or a drunk alcoholic deciding that he's sober enough to make it or whatever else you can think of, there's always one or two occasions of something happening, so I took my time as I got back on the road.

When I got home, I didn't really feel like doing much of anything. I wasn't really hungry, just really tired. As soon as I walked in the door to my house, I threw my work bag down on the couch, made my way up to my room, stripped off my work clothes, and climbed into bed in my underwear. I was just exhausted, and I really had nothing in particular that I wanted to do, so I just drifted off to sleep. It was a good, long sleep. I rested peacefully until a loud noise woke me up.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

I jumped violently in bed. The sheets had lifted off of me momentarily, and floated back down on my face. I'm ashamed to say that this caused me to spaz out like a tipped cow. When I finally calmed down, I yanked the sheets off of my face, and groggily looked at the clock. It read 12:27am. I'd been asleep for almost four and a half hours. Dismissing this discovery, and momentarily forgetting about what woke me up in the first place, I laid my head back down on my pillow, and began trying to fall back asleep. It was working too. Everything was going great, until...

CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!

"What the hell?!" I said aloud. Whatever was out there making crashing noises, sounded like they were in my front lawn. I had to go check out the source of the commotion. Now fully awake again, I flicked my light switch and threw on an old white shirt before making my way downstairs. In the darkness of my living room, I dug around in all my dirty laundry on the couch, trying to find my bathrobe. I should have known that this attempt would be in vain, so I admitted defeat and went to turn on the lights.

"Gah!... I'll never get used to how bright those lights are." Ignoring them for a second, I searched the surface of the couch, and found my bathrobe underneath all of my dirty 'workout clothes'. Upon excavating it, I threw it on as fast as I could and made my way to my desk. Whatever was out there, probably wouldn't be staying there for long. With my bathrobe now on, I grabbed the flashlight and my pocket knife (for security measures), off of my desk and made my way to the door. I put my pocket knife in the side pocket of my bathrobe, and held the flashlight in my hand. "Hopefully whatever it is isn't hostile" I thought to myself. My reflexes were terrible at this time at night, and if I were forced to put up a fight, I wouldn't last long.

My hand grasped and turned the doorknob, flinging the door open. Stepping out onto the porch, I clicked my flashlight on, to scan my yard for anything suspicious. "Let's see... stump... old wheelbarrow... empty barrels... pony under my tree... stack of used tires... chainlink fence... Wait a second..." I pointed my flashlight back at the tree. My jaw fell to the floor at the sight of what was there.

Looking back at me, with it's rose rimmed eyes, was a cyan colored pony... no... pegasus... with a rainbow colored mane and tail, a rather artistic looking scar on it's flank, and scrapes, cuts and bruises all over it's body. Out of curiosity, I looked up at the tree. Several branches were either broken and hanging by a limb, or completely severed from the tree, and had fallen onto the branches below it. I whistled in acknowledgement of the incident.

I looked back over at the pony, who had remarkably managed to pull itself back up on all fours and was staring me down. I stared back at her in amazement. This was one strong pony. "Hope I don't find that out the hard way" I thought. She took a second to secure a firm position, dug her hooves into the dirt underneath her, and unfurled her wings to, what I hoped was, their full span. The look in her eyes as she looked into mine was menacing, and I had a feeling things were going to escalate.

"Come any closer, and see what happens." she said, a fire burning in her eyes.

---

The human, who appeared to be a male of it's species, had a rather confused look on his face, as if he didn't know who I was, or what was going on. He just kept staring at me, seeming to be hesitant and fascinated at the same time. It seemed as if he had never seen a pony before. After a few more moments of him just standing there, wondering what was going on, I relaxed and folded my wings up against my side. I didn't know whether or not humans needed to blink, but this one sure as sugar wasn't. "Haven't you gotten an eye-full already?" I asked impatiently.

"What... in the world... are you...?" he asked, deliberately. This was gonna take forever if he kept up at this pace. I figured, I'll just tell him what all happened, ask him to show me somewhere I could rest, and be on my way. After all, I couldn't stay in this place with a random human gawking at me for hours on end. I'd never get home that way.

"sigh Ok, let's try to speed this along here. I'm Rainbow Dash. I'm a pegasus pony from Equestria, and I'm here by accident. I was about to win a race when I got teleported here somehow, fell out of the sky and crash landed in your tree, falling into your yard. I'm not here to do anything to anypony. I'm right now, I'm just looking for a way home," he kept examining me as if I was some kind of lab experiment gone wrong. This frustrated the hay out of me. "...and would you stop looking me up and down like I'm some kind of alien?! For Pete's sake, I know you know what I am!"

He stopped for a second, and put a hand up to his face, rubbing, what I thought was, his chin. Then a look of realization popped up on his face, followed by a look of curiosity. "Did you say your name was... Rainbow Dash?" he asked.

I just looked at him with a look that hopefully said, "Really? How dense are you?" I sighed, and answered, "Yes, my name is Rainbow Dash." He went back to rubbing his chin. "And you said you're from... Equestria?" He was starting to pluck my nerves like guitar strings.

"Yes, I'm from Equestria. Look, can you help me or not, because I really don't want to be here for much longer."

"That's what I thought you said" he muttered under it's breath. What happened next caught me completely off guard. He lunged forward, grabbed me with both hands around my neck, and pinned me up against the tree, shoving his face in close enough to mine that we were touching each other's foreheads. The look he gave me was that of complete annoyance.

"Is this some kind of joke? How many times do I have to tell you?! I'm not interested in getting addicted to something else right now! Stop trying to get me to watch that stupid pony show! I mean, isn't it enough that it's all you ever talk about, but now you had to go and pull this pathetic charade?! Let me move on with my life! No means NO!!" he ranted. What was he talking about?

"What? I don't even... Wha...? Get off of me!" I said, struggling to get free. Realizing I still had mobility of my front legs, I extended them forward putting them on his shoulders, and started trying to push him away.

"Don't play dumb with me! I know it's you in there! You can't make me do something I don't want to do, so quit trying already! This has gone far enough!" he shouted back in my face. Ok, was this guy senile or something? Nothing he was saying made any sense.

"I don't know what you're talking about! Get off of me!" I shouted again. This time, able to get my back legs free. I used the tree to my advantage, raised my back legs and shoved the human away from me. He flew backwards off of me, and fell to the ground, lying on his back, gasping for breath. I used this to my advantage, and stood over him, putting my face right in his face so we were looking each other dead in the eyes, just like how he had done to me. Quickly realizing that the tables had turned, his eyes widened in shock.

Snarling, I said with an intensity that I usually never felt, "I'm gonna make this clear, right now! If you value your life, don't EVER do that again. I don't know what your problem is, but I'm not a charade, I'm real. Did my hooves feel fake to you? Did the fur you grabbed around my neck feel fake to you? I'm 100% real, got it? I don't care what you are, or what your problem is, if you EVER try something like that again, I won't hesitate to take you out!"

As I was saying this, the look of annoyance and rage that had occupied his eyes not moments before, quickly melted away, replaced by a look of pure fear. He knew immediately that he had crossed a line, and that I was no pony to be messing with. If it weren't for the way I was raised, I would've stomped a hoof down on his face and given him a black eye for good measure, but he wasn't struggling, and seemed to understand that I wasn't in the mood for any of his 'games'.

I just stood over him for a little while longer, staring into his eyes, daring him to oppose me again. After a while he regained control of his breathing, looked at me and said, "Ok, I get it. I won't attack you again. Can you let me up now?" Geez, the way he said that, I was very tempted to smack him, but I calmed down, and stepped back so he could get up.

He picked himself up off of the ground and dusted himself off. "Look, I thought you were somebody else. You're not exactly something that's considered 'scientifically possible' around here. I just thought you were a prank from an old friend of mine who wanted to piss me off. I'm sorry. Truce?" He stretched out his hand in a gesture that suggested he wanted to shake.

After the way he had treated me, I was so tempted to just leave him there. I wanted to just fly off and leave him there gawking. I would have too, but something reminded me that I needed to find a way back home, and this was the only human I had met since crash landing in this world. Reluctantly, I gritted my teeth, brought my hoof up to meet his hand, and shook. "Truce"

He looked a bit more relaxed now, but I wasn't letting my guard down again. Looking back over at me, he said "So... it's pretty late. I've got some room on the couch if you need someplace to sleep until morning. I'll do my best to help you with your problem, then, if you still want my help."

Well, it's not like I had a second option. "Fine. That's fine." I muttered.

He made his way back over to the door and led me into his house. He started gathering a bunch of clothes off of, what appeared to be, the couch, and dropping them on the ground next to a lamp. Disappearing upstairs for a moment, he went and grabbed a blanket, and a pillow and laid them on the couch where all the clothes he'd just moved used to be.

"Ok, this should be enough to get you through the night. There's a sink in the kitchen if you get thirsty, and, I'm not sure how you prefer to do your business, but there's a small bathroom around the corner if you have to 'go' at any point. I'm gonna be sleeping upstairs if you need me. Anyway, I think that's it. I'll see you in the morning." With that, he turned around and climbed the stairs up to his room.

I set up the pillow and blanket before heading over to the kitchen and getting some water. I didn't realize how thirsty I was. After nearly drowning myself, I walked back over to my 'bed' and laid down to sleep. As soon as my head hit the pillow, and my eyes closed, I was out. I was more tired that I thought I was, apparently. I slept well too. I woke up the next morning, feeling refreshed and relaxed, which was a good thing, because when I woke up, all I could comprehend was that there was smoke filling the room, and it smelled like something was burning.

Comments

[ALIENwolve]

Rainbow Dash lost in an adventure across multiple universes, searching for the way back home? Sounds awesome!

Oh wait, it's just pony + human do nothing again... Aw...

[Vallis]

Interesting. After a (very) long while, I've found a decent "human + pony" story to read ...

That... isn't... clop.

Not bad. Not bad at all. Dun lemme down bro!! YA HEAR?!

[DanteRevolution]

If I saw RD in my front yard, I would do everything in my power not to flip out from excitement. Also great way to wake up. Smoke everywhere. Can't wait for more. :)

[The Slending Angel]

4396352 Me too, friend. Me too.

[OddOneOut]

this doesn't feel right... in the first chapter, it seemed as though dash was absolutely terrified of the mythological monster. in the second chapter, she's just kinda shrugs him off. and then she SLEEPS in the Monster's house?? i mean, sure Dash is kinda reckless, but who does that? if you suddenly teleported in front of the boogeyman's house and he tackled you into a tree, would you sleep in his house?

[musicluvr1974]

I slept well too. I woke up the next morning, feeling refreshed and relaxed, which was a good thing, because when I woke up, all I could comprehend was that there was smoke filling the room, and it smelled like something was burning.

Ah, human cooking... by a human who can't cook, apparently. (Either that or he fails to clean his heating surfaces regularly. Yes, I know this one from experience too. Don't ask. )