Beyblade, a newly invented game of customizable battle tops, suddenly takes Manehatten by storm. After Babs Seed becomes the Beyblade champion of Manehatten, she and the other Cutie Mark Crusaders become the Bladers of the Four Seasons, each bearing a Bey with strong magic. The Beyblade craze soon spreads to Ponyville, and then to the rest of Equestria. However, things start to heat up and get too serious, and before long, Beyblade is no longer just a game.
So is Spike going to be a blader? Can he have L Drago, Dragoon, or Strata Dragoon? I can picture him being the dragon empire.
Work on transitions, and take your time, don't just blur past an entire 1 hour of information just for the good stuff to be said. That being said, try not to be redundant and repeat words several times space a word at least one paragraph apart, in some cases of which that's not possible it's okay. Furthermore, more vivid descriptions and grammatical fixes are in order. It's rough but a little work and improvement and this'll be something worth reading.
I'll be watching.
Sincerely,
The Notebook
I like this, can't wait for the next chapter :)
4366097 Yeah, that's pretty obvious. But I have a really cool plan for how L Drago is going to be introduced. Let's just say it involves the Crystal Empire and a lot of Dark Magic.
A Beyblade story, huh? I've always had a guilty pleasure for that show, so it's nice to find a story like this. I'm eager to see how you'll portray Beyblade here.
4376333
same here.
Hmmmmm this story got my attention. Especially after I lost interest in the Metal Fusion series. I hope u write more of it.
Hmmm
THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE
1. Let me Guess, Babs=Gingka, Scootaloo=Kenta, Applebloom=Benkei, and Sweetie Belle=Madoka?
2. Please make more chapters of this story!
Huh, this actually looks pretty cool.
(Sees it hasn't been updated for two years)
...fudge. This story has some good potential, don't give up on it!
4367092 really can't wait
PLEASE MAKE MORE!!!!
3 2 1 LET IT RIP
I like this story it's so good, their needs to be more of this, I'm really liking it a lot and it's so interesting as well, keep up making lots more chapters in this story , it's awesome!
I don't suppose you've considered going back to this? I've been wanting a Beyblade story that has nothing to do with Beyblade characters being displaced in MLP.
Will this continue?
What will Spike get to do too?
Would he be part of the "chosen ones" too?