• Member Since 7th May, 2013
  • offline last seen Last Wednesday

Akumokagetsu


It's not an alcohol problem, it's an ethanol solution.

T

Broken, drained and trapped in the crystal prison after her deplorable defeat at Canterlot, Chrysalis expects herself to die at any time.
If only the wretched princess that she mimicked would just leave her alone.

Cover art provided by Backlash91!

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 81 )

Great start to it... and next update in a year, right?:trollestia:

I sense some mare going around :pinkiecrazy:

I wonder if Shining is actively abusive or merely neglectful... Or maybe something's up with Cadence :rainbowkiss:

4358892
We'll be lucky if we even get an update in a year:rainbowwild:

this is quite good

4358892

Didn't Aku mention in a recent blog post he has severe ADD? Also, maybe someone could actually continue it/finish it for him

4358965 I hardly, if ever, read blog posts.

I really hope it doesn't take a year for an update. Great start for the story though.

Ah Chrysalis, so quick to assume the worst of everypony. The idea that they don't hate you, or even hold your actions against you is completely alien to you, isn't it?

You have captured my attention like a certain royal Changeling.

Nope!
The concept of this pairing is disgusting in it's own right (stockholm syndrome). The idiocy of treating Chrysalis as anything but a remorseless sociopath (note how she behaved during the invasion of Canterlot, that is not how a pragmatic or decent person react to performing an evil no matter how necessary it may be).

Like Chrysalis, I suspect that it is indeed in some sense a trap, but an extremely subtle one, and one that she couldn't possibly prepare for. :)

Absolutely loving this so far. Can't wait for more :pinkiesmile:

4359376 ...If you hate the pairing so much, then what exactly prompted you to to spend the time attemping to irritate people who like it?

Man, that's good. Like, really really good. Moar :heart:

4360182
There are several other reasons to dislike the story. I don't like pairing and that is informed by several reasons based on canon that also happen to fundamentally undermine the premise.

This does seam like a really good story... And I'd love to read another few chapters of this... Its a wonderful start and I can see it turning out very well!

4360182 You have to admit, he does have a solid point there.
Evidence supports his claim. The story itself is decent I suppose. But it is questionable.
There is no logic behind it.

That being said however, this story holds an unusual premise.
For now, I shall reserve judgement until a later date. Though I dearly hope the author has some
damn good evidence to back this up. Otherwise there is no reason for this story to even be on this site in the first place.

Added to favorites. I hope this isn't wasted.

I look forward to seeing where this is going. Wonder how Shiny's gonna take it.
4359376 Meh. Pessimist.

4360496 In my humble opinion (Which is not very humble at all) the downvote should not be based upon the story, but upon the writing, grammer, and pace of the story, downvoting it just because you don't like the writer doesn't seem fair to the other readers or the writer, who may get discouraged by how many downvotes he is getting just because it is an unpopular pairing.

4359376 Have you ever thought about why Chrysalis was invading? For creatures who eat love, secrecy must be important so they must have had a very good reason to invade. What if they were starving, and attacking was a last ditch attempt at getting food? Suddenly Chrysalis doesn't seem evil, just a ruler trying to look after her subjects.

My. A fan-written story that does something that is not one hundred percent supported by canon. That never happened before. :derpytongue2:

In all seriousness, people could at least wait until the first explanation before they complain that the story makes no sense. Many stories have pulled of seemingly unbelievable ideas with the right explanation and some character work. So I'll look forward to where you are going, dear author. I will follow this.

I have read the first chapter.
4361911
So basically a story shouldn't be judged on the merits of being a story (like a premise, setting, character development, and characterization) but on the mechanics of storytelling? I have no issues with the writer I just find the story absurd and full of terrible implications. I'm also find the pairing disgusting because for all intents and purposes Chysalis TORTURED Cadence. It's like writing a story about a woman falling in love with her rapist (and Chrysalis IS a rapist, potentially a conventional one and definitely a mind rapist).
4361917
Here's what you don't get: how on Earth is terrorizing Equestria supposed to help their perceived desperate lack of love food? If nothing else Chrysalis is too incompetent to lead because her invasion would have killed it's host
Moreover consider that the whole starving thing is fanon and that Chrysalis was happy (happy!) that the invasion was going well. That is NOT the reaction of a good, decent, or even pragmatic leader doing what is necessary but of a sadistic sociopath.

4362912

It's like writing a story about a woman falling in love with her rapist

Things like that do happen sometimes. It's called Stockholm Syndrome. For more information on the phenomenon, go watch the Disney film Beauty and the Beast.

I agree with you on the second part of your post. It may be possible that they were starving, but she doesn't strike me as someone who would care about it as much as the fandom thinks she does, though it would give her soldiers additional motivation to overlook the blatant flaws in her half-baked plan.

"Doubtless they would threaten her with it, ponies were an unsavory bunch."
Should be a semi-colon.

Sequel! :flutterrage: But seriously that was great.

An interesting first chapter, though I reserve judgement until I've read further chapters.

4361917

:facehoof:

Destroying a peaceful neighboring civilization to get some momentary gain for your own people, no matter how badly they might need it, is almost universally the worst option. (see also, Pearl Harbor) Add to that, since nobody knew who Chrysalis was, she hadn't even bothered to try more peaceful solutions. Choosing to be harmful despite having the option not to is pretty much the definition of evil.

Oh, and Chrysalis never said her people were starving. It's just as likely - or more so, given her actions and personality - that she simply thought she could take a free feast and then let her greed do the talking.

:pinkiegasp: yikes not only is someone doing the same crack ship as an ongoing fic of mine, but he's used the same coverart and is the wonderful genius behind the seriously popular Evil Belle series...

Ah hell what ya gonna do :pinkiehappy:

very good start, I love thy story already:heart:

I hope that unlike many many many, good stories this at least goes past chapter one

My curiosity is yours. What will you do with it, I wonder...

What does it say about me that the idea of even somepony like Chrysallis being executed doesn't sit well with me?

4362912
Ah. Being imprisoned is the same as rape. That's a rather lot of hyperbole you're using there. All we know is Cadence was locked up and apparently not given access to a bath as she appeared fairly dirty. Even calling it torture requires far more information on her situation than canon offers, calling it equivalent to rape more so. Mind rapist may have some accuracy, on the other hand, though Cadence wasn't the victim of that. May have some accuracy, because all we know Chrysalis did there was impersonate someone and drain energy. The term 'mind rape' is usually used for actual mental alterations, which again, we don't see used, acting and shapechanging magic seem to have carried the weight of the disguise.

You're quite correct that canon makes this pairing unlikely because of many reasons, such as Cadence being happily married and Chrysalis being a nasty piece of work ( while MLP does seem like one of those universes where just about everything can be redeemed it would be hard with Chrysalis) but you do come off as overreacting in some of your comments.

And actually, the premise is one of the least important parts of a story. Two stories with the same premise can be completely different in quality. A good writer can redeem a bad premise and a bad writer ruin a good one.

Now I'm not saying this is one of those stories that redeems the premise, it's one short chapter long at this point, I'm just saying your criticisms aren't the most valid. You're free to dislike the premise enough not to read, but that doesn't automatically make it a bad story.

We'll have to see how the author handles the considerable obstacles to the story's apparent intended direction to determine if it's good or bad. It may very well turn out bad, it just hasn't yet.

Chrysalis needs to be fed more love. We need to be fed more chapters!

Don't make us bag our heads against solid crystal walls too!

4359376 You know, sometimes you need to try to be friends, if you want to be friends.

Comment posted by Hard-Pressed Scribe deleted Aug 27th, 2014

assuming this story isn't dead, I look forward to more chapters. I like the way you portray chrysalis, her actions a befitting of her mold. I wish to see another chapter if merely to see how she reacts to her new...predicament.

4358928
If that, I hear the author's a bum. :L

As one of your minions, I beseech you for another chapter! No, I beg of you! I implore! This story is really goooood! *flails helplessly at the foot of your throne*

heh...so...this is still my favorite of your stories....it's been a year now...no updates?:fluttershysad:

Not sure how to feel about the potential stockholm syndrome, but I'll keep an eye on this for now.

As someone who went over a year without updating my sole fic, I realize I don't have much room to talk, but I'd really love to see you continue this!

Good to see this story live once more :D

4358892 Wow. First time I've seen a first comment on a story be so accurate. Congrats!

hmm so far I like this. (sorry I don't have more to say)

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