• Published 8th May 2014
  • 1,522 Views, 126 Comments

Sensational Serials: Silly, Short Stories for Silly, Short Ponies - PhycoKrusk



Silly short stories for your entertainment. Not related to anything else I have written. Also not a floatation device.

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Twily and Sombs: What Happens in the Back Seat....

Author's Note:

Warning: This short contains derogatory, tribalist name calling. However, it's an alicorn calling a unicorn derogatory, tribalist names, so that makes it OK. Really. Princess Twilight told me so on this permission I wrote for her to give to me.

The quiet evening over an abandoned industrial park — located, in order to save words on description, somewhere in the American heartland — ended in a burst of blue light as a hole in time and space was ripped opened on the roadway and a hot rod red 1963 Ford Thunderbird convertible — supercharged — with all chrome hubcaps and a custom six-speed transmission exploded onto the street like a shot from a cannon. It pulled to the left just briefly before its driver, one King Sombra, regained control. As Princess Twilight Sparkle struggled to control her breathing in the passenger seat, he looked up in the rearview to see the portal they’d emerged from close, leaving an empty street in their wake.

“Ha!” Sombra pumped his hoof in the air as he drove, wearing a manic grin. “We lost them!”

“Yes, we did!” Twilight replied at a volume suggesting she was not quite agreeing. “And all it took was you senselessly risking our lives for minimal payoff! You psychomaniac! Are you missing the part of your brain responsible for responsibility, or were you just shattered crystal for so long it made you that reckless?!”

“Hey! I had everything under control!” Sombra insisted.

“Before or after you drove us off the road? The road that was on the side of a mountain!” Twilight fired back.

“We got away, didn’t we?!” Sombra demanded, glaring at his passenger.

Watch the road, pinhead!”

“Raugh!”

Inarticulately screaming with inarticulate rage, Sombra jerked the wheel hard to the left, sending the Thunderbird fishtailing through a T-intersection and up a curb cut into a parking lot before it came to a dead stop, hood pointed towards the streets and rear bumper just inches from the brick wall of the empty warehouse it almost hit.

“There! We’re stopped in between the lines with the e-brake on! Are you happy now?!” Sombra screamed.

“No! Because it still doesn’t address the issue of you being an insane pinhead, you insane pinhead!” Twilight screamed back.

“Forget your noise! I was brilliant!” Sombra shouted indignantly.

“Yes, of course, brilliant! Because we won’t have to worry about the metallicorns when we’re dead, will we?!” Twilight snarled, her mouth twisted with rage.

“Maybe you should’ve tried friendshipping them to the scrap yard!” Somber retorted. That, of course, only made things worse.

“Screw you!” shouted Twilight.

“Screw you!” shouted Sombra.

Screw you!” shouted Twilight, leaning forward aggressively.

Screw you!” shouted Sombra, leaning forward even more aggressively.

Their faces were centimeters apart, both of them sporting angry expressions and sucking down huge lungfuls of air. It was Twilight who broke the silence, an excited grin spreading across her face.

“Get in the back seat.”

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