• Member Since 16th Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Jan 13th, 2022

Dizzy Daze


I often have the strange desire to balance random objects on my head.

E

The Elements of Harmony have been returned to their tree, and their bearers are free to live normal lives again. Free to relax, knowing that their days of saving the world are over.

Then the war starts. And one pony can't shake the idea that she needs to help, to be loyal to her country.

But what about staying loyal to those she loves?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 10 )

...:applecry::raritydespair::fluttercry::fluttercry::raritycry:
I was hoping for a happy ending...

What kind of a DISGUSTING story, really. I hate every single bit about it.

4310089
Well, thank you for being honest, at least. :twilightsmile:

I'll admit, I didn't really put much thought into this. It was just an idea that kept pushing itself to the front of my mind. In fact, I didn't even reread it because I was afraid I'd hate it.

Still, there's some people out there that like reading stories like this, and one of my biggest character flaws is the need to try and satisfy everyone out there, so I figured I'd publish it anyway, because there would be some people who would read it.

Additionally, I do believe you're the first negative comment I've received, so thank you for that, as well. I hope you have a great day! :coolphoto:

4310118 The thing is the whole story being completely pointless! That's what has made me hate it so much. In fact, I can count 3 events here: 1) some random war starts; 2) Rainbow Dash leaves to join the guard; 3) Rainbow Dash dies.

What is that story about? What is there for us to learn? What is it in your story that I could experience? Nothing. Only a bunch of irritation. I'd like to say your story has a really disgusting aftertaste.

4310135
I'm not the best at doing deep stuff, but I was trying to just do a short little story about sticking your morals. In life, things like this happen; there is no clear right or wrong to do, just what feels right to you. The point of the story wasn't the war, it was supposed to be about Rainbow's feelings, and how she justifies herself to AJ.

But like I said, a lot of my writing tends to be pretty superficial, so I apologize if this story came out pointless.

4312575 PicturePerfectPony acts like a rude dick with you and not only you thank him/her for it but you also APOLOGIZE?! :rainbowhuh:
If we were in Equestria I'd recommend you to take some lessons from Iron Will.

4352168
I'm not trying to be a pushover, but I feel the need to apologize because he/she was upset for reading this, and since I wrote this, it's technically my fault. He/she does have some valid points, after all, even if the way of expressing it isn't the nicest.

4352217 Well I am way more uncompromising, as long as people are impolite and offensive it doesn't matter how valid their points are, they're still douches and they don't deserve any bit of respect.

I actually liked it.
Yes, I did personally find it slightly rushed, and it would be nice to see a reason as to why the war started in the first place, but I genuinely liked it. It could use just a little bit of improvement, as does everything, and I think I might be able to help with that. That is, if you want me to. :twilightsheepish:

But back to what I was saying, I thought it was good. Although, I feel that for maximum feels, you should try to add in more about the expressions, lighting, positions, or just tone in general. If you would like some help with that, like I said earlier, I would be happy to help. :twilightsmile:

Keep on writing, it's the only way to get better! :heart:

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