• Member Since 21st Apr, 2014
  • offline last seen 6 days ago

Smaug the Golden


All is not lost; the unconquerable will, and study of revenge, immortal hate, and the courage never to submit or yield: and what else is not to be overcome?

E

Daring Do needs a vacation. So, with her annoying subconscious in tow, the pair head to the one place where she can escape Ahuizotl, creepy fans, and treasures: Ponyville! But of course, when one goes on vacation, one must remember the essentials: a place to stay, a means of transportation, and to make sure there are no hidden temples anywhere near where you are staying.

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 37 )

Why do I get the feeling that her "subconscious" actually IS Discord?

4289112 Well, there are actually four possibilities. 1) It is Discord, like you suggested. 2) It was made by Discord to cause mischief. 3) It's just her slightly stranger side of her brain. Or 4) It's something else entirely. Don't worry, it will be revealed at the end. :twilightsheepish:

I'm honestly hoping for Daring to say, "All the ponies in this town are CRAZY!" at some point, and for Twilight to respond, "Tell me about it."

If Bedlam isn't Discord; I want them to have a conversation

4297264 That would be pretty funny.
Discord: Hi, I'm a creature of chaos.
Bedlam: And I'm an annoying subconscious.
Discord: Let's go wreak havoc.
Bedlam: Agreed.
They would win the chaos creator of the year award. :rainbowlaugh:

4298970
You forgot the part in which daring do just gives up and accepts the crazyness

Wow... I love this story!

It's really good, seriously. Do you mind if I plug in in a blog?

I knew the tap-dancing conga tarantulas was going to pop up again.

4301906 Go ahead, but please send me a link. I'd love to see it. :pinkiehappy:

So... why is there a Discord character tag if it's a different draconequus?

4310607 Discord is in this, he just hasn't been revealed yet. Dissonance is the OC tag, well, him, Riddle, Mental, and Psyche.

No Ahuizotl, no,must there is a reality warping reformed God of Chaos, a crazy pink party pony who is a minor reality warper, the fastest Pegasus in Equestria, need I go on?

4296589

Or perhaps "I feel your pain. I really do."

Hey, don't diss Glass of Water, Dissonance! It's hilarious and Discord has a great singing voice!

Daring Do and the Quest to Outwit her Subconcious, I wonder what Dash and Twi will think of it?

Hmm...
I got the feeling that this voice in her head is a certain Spirit of Strife...

:applejackconfused:
Off the beaten trail would be an understatement; ..... but very enjoyable nonetheless. Surprised to see "Double Dee" in something other than a Temple-Crawler style of story, which is also kinda sad since she's such a versatile character. Gave it a thumbs up, since overall it was a very good story.

Later .... Peace ....
:applejackconfused:

5853088 Tap-dancing conga tarantulas now canon? I'll take it. :pinkiecrazy:

This review is brought to you on behalf of the group: Authors Helping Authors

Name of Story: Daring Do's Vacation / Chapter 1

Pros:
I like the talk between them , it is funny and entertaining.
Even if they act humorous , you let them act realistic to a certain degree , that good^^
That the Voice mentioned the author is a very funny asspect I liked very much.

Cons:
Rainbow dosn´t live in Cloudsdale and Daring likes here actually , maybe you need the alternative universe tag?
I like that the Voice mentioned that it was in Pinkies head too , but then Pinkie should have interact with it more. Because: It´s Pinkie

Notes Section: Short , funny and brings you a smile , thats how a first chapter of a comedy-random story should start.

7513344 Glad you like it so far. :pinkiesmile: I'll be honest, the voice mentioning the author is basically the only time I've broken the fourth wall. :twilightsheepish:

Rainbow dosn´t live in Cloudsdale and Daring likes here actually , maybe you need the alternative universe tag?

This story was actually posted back in 2014, so the only episodes with Daring Do had been Daring Don't and Read It and Weep. Hence why this feels different from the current show. As for Cloudsdale, I had assumed the her house was part of Cloudsdale. I don't think this qualifies as AU, especially seeing as this was written before those details were changed.

Review:

Pros:
The ongoing dialog between them is going better and better. Still let my smile.
That she talkes with herself get her attention of the others and that Spike shows up was a nice to read.
The questions you bring up, which they talk about are intresting.

Cons:
Words like nervicited and sparklerific only make sense for native english speakers(nes) I guess. If you can´t identify the origins to translate them you can´t laugh at the creation.
Would like to see an hint what time in the series it is during your story.
Your formatting is very strange in this one , I reloaded my screen some times yet and it still seems a little bit messie.

Notes Section: I am still enjoing the Story and really like the dialogs. I found some logic errors I guess , but whats the fun in making sense in an random story ;-)

Chapter : Mental the Mental Psychiatrist

Pros:
The sheep thing was a good idea , some randomness with style.
The way the assistant react to Bedlam , unexpected and cool.
Funny ending again.

Cons:
The formatting is again a bit messi.
Twilights hesitate dosn´t make sense , because someone , maybe Spike, would have told her of Darings strange behavior.

Comment section: Still entertaining , nothing much to say , it is good^^

Name of Story: Daring Do's Vacation Chapter 4 Riddle the Sphinx

Pros:
Pinkie acts totally like Pinke should , good job!
tap-dancing conga tarantulas <--- stand for itself.


Cons:
If she didn´t want their help why ask them?
Sometimes it would help if you would add who is speaking. During my work with other authors I noticed that this often is a problem for nnes , to find out who is actually speaking in an conversation.
The question what a sphinx is , shouldn´t come from Daring
Wasn´t dissonance already gone , how could he open the door?

Notes Section: The Chapter is a pleasure because you hit the way Pinkie act so good , but it is a bit unclear to nnes who is speaking some times and I think you made a few bad choices who you let act at the events.

Review for Chapter 5 Dissonance the Draconequus

Pros:
Just changed the answer , that had made me laugh

piñatas being creatures of evil.


The amound of good jokes is very nice^^

Cons:
A little bit hard to understand what´s exactly going on at the middle part and re-reading breaks the good mood.

Comment section: Actually I laughed the most in this chapter of your story. If there wasn´t the short part where I had to focus to understand whats going on I would have laughed till the end , good work!

*Beware spoilers*


Review for chapter 6 : The Not-So-Ultimate Showdown that Lasts About One Minute

Pros:
Again very good dialogs between the characters.

“No, you won’t,” Pinkie stated.
“Yes, we will.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Yes, we will.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Yes, we are.”
“Yes, you will.”
“No, we aren’t.”
“Yes, you will.”
“No, we are not,” Dissonance growled, holding Pinkie up by her hair. “We are not going to take over Equestria, and that is final. Come on guys.” The draconequus whipped around and started to walk away, when Riddle grabbed him.

Brilliant!^^
Actually I wish I could see that to 'a little glass of water'

Cons:

He flipped through the book his book until he found the page he was looking for

In my opinion it is a typo or there has to be a ( , ) between 'the book' and 'his book'.

Pinkie nodded. “Even though you like parties, we’re taking you down.”

first time ooc for her , I guess
No cotton candy :-(

Comment section: A nice little chapter again , well written and funny but not as good as the previos in my small opinion. It let last my smile longer but didn´t get my laugh as much as the previous one.

Review : For the entire story

Pros:
Your dialogs are very funny and you have enough Jokes in the story to make it enjoable.
The idea´s you present us are fresh and a pleasure to read.
You managed to let the characters act like they would in cannon , very well!
The ending of every chapter is giving you a smile or let you laugh.

Cons:
Even if you let the characters act cannon , you pickes sometimes the wrong to take action in my opinion.
I really had want to hear what fluttershy had to say about Discords appearence.
Your formatting is messed up.


Comment section:
I really enjoyed reading your story over the last days. I liked you ideas and the way you let all persons interact and the way you let end your chapters also. Even if not every pun works and you let go some possibilities , you made me laugh sometimes so thank you for writing this story^^

your earned a *thumb up*

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