I write pony words. Millions of them. Some people actually think they might be worth reading. I am very thankful for that. Also, I have a Patreon now?
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I've never really had any imaginary friends when I was a foal. I guess I didn't really have time for them. I mean, I had my books and my BBBFF, so I didn't really feel like I needed to create one.
I guess that's why I found it so strange when Rarity came to me, asking for help with Sweetie Belle. Seems she had managed to pick up one of her own, and it was starting to cause some problems. Well, of course I'd be willing to help Rarity in any way I could. What are friends for?
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So get this: I come up with the idea for this story, and come up with the name "Jackie" thinking that it's sufficiently creepy for this kind of thing. Nothing triggered that, I just thought it up. So, not long before I started, my next-door neighbor in my residence hall is blasting American Dad, so I go to tell her to turn it down. I walk over to her door, and what name is all over it?
Jackie.
4276651
Dude. Creepy.
Stop that.
Now i am afraid to read this >_<
4276651
Is her full name Jackie N. Goff...?
I'll just see myself out.
Hmm, interesting.
4276651
Ah read it. Givin' it a like because it was well done and creepy.
Not gonna follow it though.... My scary threshold is not that strong...... Don't do scary too well
...
Consider me spooked, can't wait to see how this plays out :)
Oh I love these kind of stories, it's always fun to guess what's up with the person seeing people.
Is it all in Sweeties head? Is it some ghost or demon? Is it a weird ass spell or magical creature? Figuring it out is going to be so much fun!
4276651 2spooky4u
It sounds like bi-polar schizophrenia, but i'm not an expert.
4345936 You make a joke, and then in the next comment, you make the same joke?
4345875 eeyup. Or a soul attachment spell. Big taboo...
4346012
What was the joke?
4346152
We'll never know cuz it was deleted 4 times.
Why do I get the feeling this is like that one episode of Ed, Edd, n Eddy, where Ed has an imaginary friend named Jeb.
4345824 my money's on a demon, I'm always a sucker for the supernatural
Mm, another story to favorite! I'll have to watch this! It's kinda hard not to picture KillerRarity though. It seems Sweetie Belle gets angry when Twi was asking about Jackie, I wonder why. I thought she would be excited. Hm.
Well, this is interesting. It kinda depends on what kind of creepy you're aiming for.
Creepy 1: Jackie doesn't exist and there's something seriously wrong with Sweetie Belle.
Creepy 2: Jackie is real, in which case...
I guess it'll hinge on whether or not Jackie graduates from just "saying" stuff to doing stuff, as opposed to making Sweetie Belle do stuff.
4276651 glad to see that you are still alive
if not for much longer ............ JACKIE
I vote for Nightmare Moon, based off some of the conversations.
Welp, better get a good priest and some strong ropes, 'cause demons be all up in this shit.
It'd be creepier if it was Scarlet Tomato... you know... the pony that Sweetie killed in the KillerRarityVerse.... Now I'd be completely freaked out over that.
-bathroomstahl
Based on my superior knowledge of the supernatural, this sounds like either a poltergeist that has befriended Sweetie and wishes to wreak havoc through her, or a demon that will posses her (or has already done so, in a sense of how Jackie can "flip the switch", so to speak)
I can tell this will turn out to be a fantastic story. Keep up the good work, BronyWriter!
Also, dat some scary-ass shit with the American Dad thing. Not sure if true, or BW just trying to psych us out.
Hold on, I've got Lorraine Warren's number. Just give me a second.
Well this sure is an interesting start to a story... I have a feeling that there is more to Jackie then just voices in her head, and that there is an external conciousness behind it. I look forward to seeing more and how this develops from here, it should be interesting...
My expectations to seeing the title being "Jackie":
wallpoper.com/images/00/38/40/32/comics-the_00384032.jpg
4347763 And I expected something like this:
ih3.redbubble.net/image.14694540.1176/flat,550x550,075,f.u1.jpg
Sounds interesting. I'm totally adding it to my "Read Later" pile!
4348363
That is a great image and I applaud your taste, you handsome rogue!
Rule #1 for scary children: Kill them before they kill you or anyone else.
I have applied that rule with great religious zealotry in my own life.
Ooh, an actual horror story... I haven't really seen one of those on here before.
Holy crap, is Sweetie schizophrenic? Or possessed?
Sweetie Belle is confused as to why everyone doesn't like Jackie.
69th like
Why do you write creepy stuff all the time that I enjoy so much?
I really hope this isn't a supernatural thing. That Sweetie Belle is getting mental issues. I'll fav it none the less but I really want her just to be crazy and not haunted.
FIRST DISLIKE!!!!
Naw, I couldn't be that cruel. Great story, by the way.
why do I get the felling this will be kind of like paranormal activity, but with ponies?
4345721
HOLY S*** ITS A MODERATOR.
CODE BLUE! CODE BLUE!
4276651
That may or may not breach upon the many levels of scary shit.
as I the only one thinking 'Jackie" was Laughing Jack until Sweetie said it was a she?
Awesome fic, I love it, can't wait for the next chapter
keeping in read later until done. Lovew it so far.
I think that Sweetie Belle is loco in the coco.
But in all seriousness: This might be a case of Sweetie being a schizo (I don't kniw how to write the whole word and I don't feel like looking it up).
Oh, and I do believe this is fitting.
Well... I'm scared now.
And I'm faving this, so that I can be scared later, as well!
4346745
Jackie doesn't want anypony else to see her.
Jackie is my new best friend.
From literally the very first sentence, I could tell this would be an interesting story. And so far, it is. I think the most unnerving detail about the story so far is that Twilight didn't mention hearing the closet door open and close after she knocked, but heard it when she left silently. This brings about two potential scenarios in my mind: either Jackie went into the closet when Sweetie Belle said to come in and Twilight couldn't hear her, or she's imagining it... which does bring the mystery of if Jackie is real or not.
I will say this: so far, I think the characterization, narration and tone are very evocative and mood-setting. I'm excited for the second chapter.
"Sweetie's not here right now, Missus Torrance."
"...Sweetie's not here right now, Missus Twilight."
"Wait, who?"
Seriously though, good story. I look forward to reading more.