• Member Since 7th Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 12th, 2014

memphisgurl


huge my little pony fan, female

Comments ( 4 )

I think you deserve a thumbs-up.

It was a good story, well executed for what it was, but I think you fell into a trap I see in a lot of these stories: You forget that love and loss are not the only emotions at work here. Living with some one for ten years, a hundred years, a thousand, gives you a complete picture of who they are, not simply a rosy one. I just, I don't really believe it when Celestia paints this absolutely glorified picture of Luna. When your heart breaks there is pain, and blame: Luna betrayed Celestia, she turned on her--and Celestia in this doesn't even appear to have a lick of anger, or desperation. Even a paragraph to the effect of "Why did you do it Luna? What changed? What happened to you? Why did it have to end this way? Can't we go back to how it was?" would have made this all feel...more real and less like a press release you know?

Sorry that's sort of my button-issue here. ...I actually did like it though.

4485415 Yeah, you're right. If I had actually planned out this story and thought about it in detail I probably would have done something like that. However, I threw this together in about 15 minutes and didn't really go back over it very much. I'm glad that you did like the story though.

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