Like Mending Glass

by Eyeswirl the Weirded

Chapter 11: A New Day

…At least it’s not darkness this time.

Blueblood was chained by his hooves to a wall, but he could very clearly see abundant moonlight streaming through a hole in the ceiling of the dungeon cell he’d apparently been confined in. Before he could so much as voice his confusion, somepony else’s voice shook the area.

“YOU HAVE FAILED IN YOUR TASK, YOUNG PRINCE!!”

About a second after the ringing in his ears stopped, a large, black form stomped it’s way into his vision. Seeing the blue helmet and cat-like eyes attached to the towering, pitch-black alicorn he’d heard quite a bit about after last year’s Summer Sun Celebration, he refused to believe it was what it appeared to be.

She gritted sharp teeth, looking at him with disgust. “Are you going to say nothing? No excuses for your inability to perform such a simple task, no shifting of blame to other parties in the hope that I may spare you?”

The trembling noblepony could only blink in confusion.

Nightmare Moon snarled at him. “Playing the fool as ever, are you? So be it, I will recount your objectives before you are condemned to suffer.” She floated a little clipboard and reading glasses from within her wings, apparently, somehow donning the latter despite wearing a helmet to read from the former as a bored factory worker might when taking inventory of boxes stacked in a dusty back room. “Sow fear and loathing of unknown nocturnal forces in the populace, Check. Perturb the workings of the cake industry so as to throw off Celestia, Check. Meet my agent in Everfree for further instructions…” She stared at him, lowering the glasses along her snout. “Failed.”

Doing his best to disregard whatever the hay she was talking about, Blueblood forced what he hoped would be a charming smile. “T-two out of three isn’t bad, don’t you thi-“

“SILENCE!!”

Does it count as silence if all I can hear is ringing noises…?

“The last step was the most important, you MUST return to Everfree and convene with the mare of gold and crimson eyes!”

He started to sweat. “There’s n-no way I could, I didn’t even, NONE of those things were done on purpose, I-“

“Of course not, you are a sleeper agent in MY employ, making your failure all the more baffling!”

“S-SLEEPER AGENT?!”

Nightmare nodded, grinning a little. “Taken from birth to be my tool, you were programmed from the day you first formed cognition to further MY designs.” The smile was replaced by a sneer. “That you somehow deviated from your given routes is truly a monument to your incompetence, AND FOR THAT,” Her wings flared out as she reared up on her hind legs, “YOU MUST BE PUNISHED!”

Her eyes glowed pure white as the rest of her blackened, seeming to melt into an amorphous mass of dark, alicorn-shaped muck, throwing itself on him. The sludge quickly clogged his mouth and nostrils as he struggled in vain against the metal binds that held him…

And then he woke up, screaming, in a fairly cozy bed, a hotel room, by the looks of things. He sat for several moments, thinking of what just happened and contemplating likely causes. Nightmares. Well, I did just return from the most horrific experience of my life in Everfree Forest, so I suppose it’s to be expected. Getting to his hooves, he shrugged, he had things to do, even if he didn’t know what they were yet.

After cleaning himself up a bit with a quick shower and his usual morning spells, he did what he could to repair the tattered parts of his coat, which held up surprisingly well for a trip through Everfree. It was while straightening it out that he noticed something in one of the pockets, a rose. Fresh, too...

Could this be the same rose as the one Screw Loose dug up?

It might have been taken with him to the hospital after he was presumeably pulled out from under the fallen tree, but the notion was preposterous, how long ago had that been? Not terribly long, he knew, but how long did it take for a flower to start wilting? Still, the only alternative was that someone stuffed a rose in his pocket while he was out. Not able to discern which was the more absurd scenario, he pocketed the rose again, not wanting to worry about it for now.

He strolled out to the foyer to see what looked like the aftermath of a foal's birthday, perhaps a cuteceanera, streamers and partially deflated balloons all over the place, snacks and punch on a table, a pile of confetti being swept up by a custodian. Not wanting to think about the implications of waking up with no memory of how he got here to find what may have been a party for those considerably younger than him, he trotted quickly to the counter, tended by a dull-brown earth pony with a fluffy moustache, looking up from a newspaper he'd been reading while casually reclined in his seat, who nodded in acknowledgement before he could speak.

"Mornin', Mr. Blueblood, you sleep ok? Was worried the party last night might'a woke ya up after that nice seamstress brought'cha in."

Alright, he thought with some relief, that at least clearifies that I did not attend, and get black-out drunk at, a party for colts and fillies. This seemed like a bad time to start on his Pompous Prince idea, having apparently just recieved undue kindness. He nodded to the clerk. "I am well-rested, thank you. You said somepony brought me here...?"

---

Walking through town, he reflected on just why Luna must have liked it here; kind, caring ponies always seemed to show up to help him while he was unconcious.

Alright, maybe not in those words, but twice now he'd been incapacitated and somepony had looked after him, the one who brought him to the hotel, -a rather nice one, at that- paying for everything herself and not so much as leaving a note of any kind, and Zecora. The clerk said she'd almost definitely turn down any offer in terms of being repaid for such generousity, but as with Zecora, he wanted to at least try. And then maybe he'd say/do something 'snooty'.

Carousel Boutique, he said, tall, elegant building, can't miss it. His pride as a Master of Navigation would be on the line if he did. Luckily, it wasn't hard at all to spot. Approaching the door, he heard muffled shouting from inside, leaping back in a fright when that door swung open, inches away from hitting him, as something shot past in a heap, the door slamming shut in almost the same instant.

"Sheesh," a voice sounded from the direction the blur had gone, "some ponies, noooooo sense of humor."

Looking to the source, Blueblood saw none other than Discord himself, sprawled upside down on the ground. Getting to his hooves, claw, hoof and claw, Discord smiled down at him. "Wellll, if it isn't Mr. Fancy Pants!"

"Fancy Pants is the one with the blue moustache," the prince deadpanned, "usually has a monocle as well?" They'd been through this many times, but it was usually easier to just go with it.

Discord snapped his fingers, a monocle and stylish top hat appearing on his person. "Quite right, old bean, quite right."

Blueblood was sorely tempted to ask why he was in Ponyville too, but didn't want to have to explain why he was there himself, or worse, hear the spirit's answer. He turned to the Boutique. "If you'll excuse me, I have some business with the owner of this-"

He was pulled back by his tail. "Ohhhh, nononono, my fine chap," Discord had adapted a faint Canterlot accent, sounding not unlike the average noblepony, "you'll be most inclined to refrain from that course of action, as I do believe the Lady of the House of Mannequins is rather miffed."

"Miffed?"

A sagely nod as Discord drank from an upside-down wineglass full of bees. "I say, miffed."

"Is there any particular reason she might be miffed?"

"If so, I supposed it was missed."

"You missed the reason she was miffed?"

"Missed it in a mist, old boy, missed it in a mist."

This was silly, but, like rhyming, oddly fun. "I missed the meaning of this mist."

Discord was now playing a violin with a saw. "'Tis a sad song, dear chum, that mist that was hissed by the mistress so miffed, so I missed why she was miffed in that mist oh so-"

The door to the Boutique slammed open, startling Blueblood into leaping instinctively to the side of where he'd been, away from the door as a loud, furious mare's voice boomed from behind him. "AND TAKE THIS FILTH WITH YOU!!"

In an instant, a massive pile of what appeared to be charcoal was levitated through the door in light blue magic, landing squarely on the best-dressed draconequus he'd ever seen, the door slamming shut again immediately after.

Discord popped out of the pile wearing a yellow hardhat with a light on it, covered in black splotches. "Like I said, she's pissed."

Blueblood only stared at him.

"What?" He shrugged innocently, clearing the dark substance away with a snap of his fingers. "I only offered to help her make a diamond even bigger than the last one I tempted her wi-" There was sudden, unconvincing coughing fit. "Offered, with use of large piles of coal, but apparently the crucible I had in mind for this was already occupied by a long stick." He threw up his arms, exasperated. "How was I supposed to know she's like that all the time?!"

The prince looked for words, but they didn't come right away. Luckily, he was able to fill the awkward silence. "Right. Soo, suppose I'll be wanting to wait a while before meeting Miss..." Oh, horseapples, I forgot to ask her name!!

Discord didn't seem to pick up on his quiet distress. "Yup." He picked Blueblood up, tucking him under and arm like a foal with a plushie. "So, what's say in the meantime we have a picnic? The roof of Sugarcube Corner is just dandy today..."

---

Pinkie was sprawled out on her bed, mane lacking some of it's usual poofiness as she pondered what kept going wrong. She tried waiting for the prince at Zecora's place, but he never showed up! Apparently he got hurt on the way again, so she tried throwing a party in the hospital, but everypony said no. She really meant to keep it a quiet ok-for-hospitals party, but they still eventually threw her out! Feeding him the potion had been kinda fun, but he wasn't awake, so it didn't count as a welcome. Next, she figured that if Blueblood was hanging around town for a while, that he'd want to stay at the fanciest hotel in Ponyville, so she set up a party there, and again he didn't show up! Everypony that did seemed to have fun, but for the guest of honor to miss his own party twice in a row was unbelieveable!

Well, that it happened twice made it kinda believeable, so it was believe-ish, but she still didn't like it! She let out a tired sigh. Where could he be?

---

Just a few meters above Pinkie Pie, her target and some-draconequus else she'd meant to throw a party for at some point were hidden by the wood, insulation, and confectionary decorations that made up the roof of the highest room in Sugarcube Corner.

Prince Blueblood had an odd relationship with the Spirit of Chaos, they didn't have anything against one another besides the obvious, one being related to Celestia and the other a maniac that had terrorized Equestria, but they weren't quite friends, either. He supposed this was due in part to Discord always preferring to irritate his aunts whenever possible, ponies like himself being small potatoes in comparison, rarely subject to a direct prank of any kind at all, which suited him fine.

He had time to reflect on this as they ate green waffles on the roof of the place Blueblood had collapsed from exhaustion in just last night, a pitcher that constantly changed the beverage it would pour sitting between them.

Discord rested with his back against one of the giant candles on the synthetic confection they were occupying, arms folded behind his head. "So, I hear you've been busy actually doing things of late, a welcomed change of pace!"

Taking a sip of what had been poured in his glass when the pitcher was apparently set to watermelon juice, Blueblood ignored the barb at his until-recently uninvolved lifestyle before answering. "You're referring to the parade, I'm guessing?"

A pair of white gloves, strange-looking things that they were, appeared and began clapping as Discord grinned. "Fine show, if I may say so, the noise, the tunes, the utter disregard for Canterlot's stuffy status quo? The ensuing panic of monsters preying on unwary ponies after dark, the richer the better," he grinned, mouth suddenly full of long, golden fangs, "was an absolute joy to behold!"

Blueblood blinked. "The richer the...? I don't recall anything about that in the song."

Snickering, Discord looked away innocently. "Ohh, you know how ponies get when they're afraid, they'll believe anything they hear. Can't imagine what kind of rapscallion would go spreading such rumors, though, much less adding onto them."

The appearance of a glowing halo might have been almost expected, if hadn't been over Blueblood's own head. The implication took a minute to sink in, he spoke with equal parts confusion and indignation. "A-are you accusing me of something?"

The sinister grin he hadn't seen on the spirit as often showed as Discord chuckled. "Who was it that sang about horrible monsters in the dead of night, akin to ponies?"

"I never said anything about them eating the wealthy, specifical-"

Sitting up, Discord waved a talon dismissively. "Ohh, I may have colored it a little here and there, just for a spot of harmless fun, but it's because of you that quite a bit of sleep was lost, by terrified nobles and overclocked guards alike. I'll bet you've made an enemy of the bat pony community, too." He laughed for moment as the prince shivered at the thought. "Really, I'm quite impressed! All that with a song? Not bad, Little Boy Blue, not bad at all."

Something sunk in his stomach as he tried to defend himself. "B-but I, it was just-"

"A spot of harmless fun...?" The spirit smirked, though not as maliciously as he could have. "Not all fun is harmless, eh? Terrible business, but not all harm is funless, too, so there's a silver lining!"

Blueblood blinked.

He laughed, taking to the air despite his wings not moving. "I'll tell you about it when you're older. Well, it's been fun, Your Whoness, but I've got a few more errands in town, ta-ta!" He snapped his fingers, disappearing in a flash, leaving the prince alone with his thoughts. On a rooftop. He'd mind that part later.

This came up in that nightmare as well, sowing fear and, as often follows, loathing? He hadn't meant any harm that day, just sang the first thing that came to him, which happened to be his long-held phobia. In reflection, he could see how it might have been misconstrewn as a direct warning, perhaps even a call to arms against what he hadn't even identified. He'd have pondered how Discord knew exactly what he meant, but it didn't seem too hard to riddle out, even if the citizens of Canterlot still hadn't gotten it. Luna's guards probably heard about it by now, I'll have to do something to make it clear I never held any ill will towards them, nightmarish anatomy or no.

Sitting on the cupcake-colored roof, he puzzled on how best to do this. Looking around from the vantage point he'd been conveniently left on, he sought... What? What's going to pop out at me as a way to say "I'm sorry I might have just made fitting in a bit more difficult for your species, not even for a good reason, please don't hang me upside down and tear my legs off"?

Clamping down on thoughts like those, he decided, would be a good place to start.

I see... Carousel Boutique, houses, what looks like a barn, -go figure- more houses... He dared look in the direction of Everfree Forest, half-expecting something to catch him looking, grab him all the way from however far this was, and drag him screaming into the darkest re-he slapped himself.

He had to stop letting thoughts like these go unchecked. Caution was healthy, paranoia was often reasonable to a degree, this was letting fear and pessimism run wild, exactly the sort of thing that had been effectively running his life for as long as he could remember. "Has to stop," he muttered to himself, "it has to stop..."

"What does?"

Blueblood jumped, wondering for only a fraction of a second if the moment, the one moment in which he decided not to be wary of the world just waiting for him to drop his guard, it would swallow him, had finally come. It hadn't. He whipped his head in the direction of the voice to see a grey, wall-eyed pegasus, a cheerful little grin on her face as she floated nearby, head tilted inquisitively.

He reddened faintly. "I-it, I was, uh..." Clearing his throat, he took a stance as regal as one reasonably could atop a giant, synthetic confection. "Just something beneath my position I've been doing lately."

"Hmm..." Her eyes seemed to swirl about in her head, but so subtley he wasn't sure they were moving, or if it was her head. They proved so mesmerizing, he missed whatever question she'd just asked.

He shook his head rapidly. "I'm sorry, what was that?"

She smiled. "Mr. Rich! I bet he could help you."

"...Pardon?"

"You said something about position, that's rich-pony talk, right? I hear Rarity talk about stuff being 'uncouth' and 'un-other-things'" she stretched out her forehooves emphatically, somehow not losing her balance too much as her body leaned back in mid-air during a long declaration, "aaaaaaaall the time!" She fluttered a bit, but regained equilibrium in just a few seconds. "So I figured you're a rich pony. Are you?"

He nodded slowly, which earned a silly little grin from the golden-eyed wonder. "I guessed it, woohoo!" She flew in a circle a few times quickly, slamming into one of the giant, fake candles almost comically, getting back into the air before Blueblood could even move.

Maybe this explains the eyes, he thought.

She pointed a hoof over to what appeared to be a distant mansion the prince hadn't noticed before. "Mr. Rich's place is that-a-way!"

He nodded. "Thank you for the tip, Miss...?"

Her head tilted, wings stuttering for a few beats. "Miss? What were you aiming for?"

"What?"

"Miss. That's like, not-hit?"

He blinked very slowly. "Right. I was actually asking your name."

"Oh!" She giggled. "Most ponies call me Derpy!"

He nodded. "Thank you for the tip, Miss Derpy."

She grinned. "Miss Doo."

"Derpy Doo?"

The smile widened, she loved this game. "Ditzy Doo."

Blueblood was getting confused. "Is Derpy a middle name, then?"

"No, my middle name's Esmeralda."

He appeared increasingly bewildered. "D... Ditzy Doo Esmer-no, Derpy-Ditzy Esmeralda Doo? Or, Miss Doo, Ditzy Esmeralda Der-"

The pegusus burst into gigglefits before responding. "I gotta go now, but it was fun talking to you. Seeya later, Prince Blueblood!"

And with that she flew off, in an incredibly erratic flight pattern full of unecessary turns and arcs, nearly crashing into the local architechture at least twice before flying out of sight. It was right about then that a chill creeped along his spine, quiet fear again worming it's way into his thoughts. I never told her my name.

He heard voices from below. Looking down to the streets, he saw several ponies gathering around the building on which he stood staring up at him, speaking to one another just loudly enough that he could hear the dull murmur of conversation. Reddening faintly, a number of dots connected at once in his head.

I, an outsider, and a well-reknowned noblepony at that, have been in this town for a few days, doing some slightly odd things. At this point, he was probably the talk of the town. Irony involving his initial quest for an improved reputation ignored, he cast a slow-fall spell and leapt off the roof, drawing some gasps from the ponies below, followed by sighs of relief when he landed safely. He began a brisk trot in the direction Derpy, or Esmeralda, or whatever, had pointed him, not sure what he'd do, but not wanting to draw a crowd at the moment.

---

While Blueblood knew not every wealthy pony lived in Canterlot, he hadn't thought any would be located in a place such as Ponyville. He'd heard about the Rich family, though, making their living vending apples from the local farm far and wide, particularly some kind of special jelly. Why the apples weren't the ones living in the mansion in that case was anypony's guess. Approaching the door, he rang the doorbell once and waited. A moment later, the door was answered by an elderly, purple stallion, probably a butler.

Blueblood cleared his throat. "Good Morning. I am here to pay a visit to the master of the house." I have no idea what for, but there's bound to be something. Maybe talk about that famous jelly? "Might Mr. Rich be available?"

He could practically hear the butler's joints creaking as he turned his head to look back into the house for a moment, his voice slow, showing the strain of age. "Mr Rich is out right now... Foals, though, need somepony'ta watch 'em... I ain't so much for the youngin's, could you, maybe...?"

Foals? The prince wasn't exactly good with children, in his experience. "I'm sorry, I don't quite-" Looking into the old one's eyes, they practically sang of wear, of many long years of working, possibly under conditions not unlike those he'd often subjected those back at the palace to; highly demanding and lacking in immediately apparent gratitude. "I-I mean, I'm not sure it's entirely appropriate to-" Decades. Decades of tiresome tasks, day, after day, after day.

He gave in. "It... I mean, p-perhaps I could try...?"

The butler's mouth moved just a little, almost a smile as he nodded in affirmation, opening the door and motioning, somewhat tiredly, for Blueblood to follow.

Foalsitting was by no means a new concept, perhaps it would be fine?

Author's Note:

'When will he finally run into Rarity,' you ask? Some day, Pinkie Promise.

Does anyone else have a REALLY hard time remembering how to spell draconequus? I always have to look it up...

Comments

[djthomp]

Discord makes a good point about the song, I'm a little surprised Luna didn't mention it to Blueblood a couple chapters back when she he visited him in the hospital. Definitely something he'll need to help clear up, and probably sooner rather than later.

And soooo much teasing with the almost run-ins with Rarity. Well, almost run-ins while he was conscious, she's seen him plenty while he was out of it. I'm really curious about what she thinks of him at this point.

[ShadowLDrago]

"Fancy Pants is the one with the blue moustache," the prince deadpanned, "usually has a monocle as well?" They'd been through this many times, but it was usually easier to just go with it.

Best pony.

The smile widened, she loved this game. "Ditzy Doo."

So she's trolling him, Discord would be so proud.

Foalsitting was by no means a new concept, perhaps it would be fine?

Considering this is Diamond Tiara we're talking about, I doubt it.

[Macgyver644200]

He appeared increasingly bewildered. "D... Ditzy Doo Esmer-no, Derpy-Ditzy Esmeralda Doo? Or, Miss Doo, Ditzy Esmeralda Der-"

And now we know why Hot Topic just calls her Bubbles.

[The Richmaster]

A lot of interesting points this chapter, especially from Discord, though Miss Doo was pretty good too... no sign of Rarity interaction, though