When the Everfree Burns

by SpiritDutch

Chapter 2: The "Free City" of Ponyville

The dawn stole quietly over the planet, as was its divine mandate. Children were warmed in their beds by the solar rays licking their faces. The impoverished multitudes huddling in the deep darkness of the alleys awoke and began their shambling. The guardspony at attention sighed in relief, and the guardspony at home groaned in annoyance.

One particular unicorn, in her tower of Canterlot Castle, passed her eyes methodically over her papers. She turned the page. But it was over, the last book had been read, mentally annotated, mentally catalogued, put aside. The information was mentally processed, formed into arguments, put to paper, checked and corrected. Twilight had finished her essays and thesis, writing over ten-thousand words in a night. It was a miserable but somewhat final conclusion to her scholarly life.
The unicorn stretched her aching limbs, closed her sore eyes. Finally, she let out an anguished roar.

Twilight fell back onto her bare floor. She wasn't sure who she hated the most: herself, the books, or the princess who had forced her to this. The sun decided this to be the opportune moment to peak over the western mounts. The entire tower was doused in the loving light, and Twilight's mind was made.
"Accursed sun! Take your daughter back already! Give me a little longer in the dark or I will be courted by your enemies, fiend!" Twilight screamed again, hurling curses that were wasted on the Sun, for she cared little for ponies anyway.

The Sun's princess, however, was listening, and winced at every accusation of impropriety her student threw from across the castle.
Celestia had not slept at all, dreading what awful premonitions would torment her. The terrible loneliness of watching a city asleep was alleviated by Twilight's company. From the watchtower, Celestia watched the light and silhouetted movement shining through the windows, and wondered if Twilight feared her dreams as well. If not presently, then soon. Twilight Sparkle would be facing nightmares and sleep horrors. That was not something Celestia could help her with, for everypony knew Alicorns did not dream.

---

Some hours later, the sun had risen to its proper place in the morning skies. Ponies got up and went back to the grind of mundane mortal life.

The pony calling herself Pon-3 soaked in the bustle of the Old Town streets, the characteristic impatient business of the shopkeepers, traders, professionals, and clerks all pushing past her and each other to get to their day's work. It had been a few years, and some of the shops had changed owner or trade, but Pon-3 still felt right at home. These were her childhood streets.

She came to an intersection. Across from her was a coffee shop occupying the corner, with a small veranda and tables both inside and outside the establishment.
"Thank the stars above it's still there." Pon-3 said with a smile, trotting over to the coffee shop. The Fluyt, the sign said.

"Hello mis. Sit anywhere." The proprietor said over her shoulder as she attended another patron.

She doesn't recognize me, Pon-3 thought to herself. It was probably the goggles. Her turn came and she requested a pot of coffee, so the proprietor ducked inside to grab a whole flagon, freshly heated by the fireplace.

"Best stuff in the city." Pon-3 reminisced, setting her bits on the table. She had gotten a fair purse for selling Twilight Velvet's jeweled bangle, but she would need some gold for equipment, information, and possibly bribes- She had received the list, just as Velvet's creepy maid had promised, and was giddy to get to work.
A little coffee was the only indulgence she would allow herself before the action began.

The shop was attended by morning regulars: Students from the university chatting before classes, casual philosophers discussing esoteric nonsense about the nature of the world, young journeymen plotting nuisance for their masters, and a couple sullen suspect revolutionary types. Yes, not much different from before Pon-3 had been exiled.

But Pon-3 senses tingled, and her attention was inexplicably drawn to a pony coming through the street crowds towards the coffee shop. Pon-3 couldn't tell what the tingle was until the the pony cleared the crowd- They looked very much like Twilight Velvet, with a similar face and mane, but of different colors. She had a similar aura to Velvet too.

"Excuse me!" Pon-3 waved to the new arrival. "You can sit with me, mis!"

The new mare obliged, moving in a manner best described as a drift, and plopping into the chair across from Pon-3. The purple unicorn was ragged, mane askew and eyes bloodshot. Her saddlebag was overflowing with scrolls and quills.

"I was never going to be able to finish this whole flagon, heh heh. Might as well drink it up between friends, so the waitress doesn't get ahold of the leftovers to resell to the next sap!" Pon-3 joked, but her words seemingly bounced off the other mare. "Hey, mate, you alright?"

The mare blinked slowly, her eyes becoming unfocused. "Uhh..." She slumped, the jerked back up, sucking in a breath. She shook her head and blinked rapidly. "Pour me some of that..." She began to sag in her chair again.

Afraid her guest was going to pass out cold, Pon-3 quickly served some of the coffee to a cup and passed it to the mare.

"Hhhh..." The mare roused from her malaise long enough to gulp some of the coffee. That woke her somewhat. “I keep promising myself to never ever to pull an all-nighter again. I keep breaking that promise." She cleared her throat. "Thank you very much for the cup. I had actually just come to pay my tab here, and didn't intend on getting anything. Goodness, I probably wasn't going to make it home."

"Yeah, no problem, honest. It's the least I can do." Pon-3 nodded. She didn't know who the purple mare was, but if she was actually a relative of Velvet's, Pon-3 could possibly gain a little leverage over her employer with some sensitive information. But first she had to make sure there was a connection. "I'm an acquaintance of Twilight Velvet's and-"

That produced a sour reaction from the mare. "Oh, so, you weren't giving a mare a pick-up out of the goodness of your heart. Do you expect me to put in a good word for you or something?"

"Oh come on now mate, I sorta recognize you is all. Just being friendly." Pon-3 smiled apologetically. Connection proved. "Though I'll admit to you, your name never came up."

The purple mare deliberated for a while. "Twilight Sparkle." She said, then after another few moments of deliberation, addended. "Viscountess."

"Ho what now?" Pon-3 squinted.

“I'm Twilight Sparkle, lady of house Twilight-Bright, Grand Squire of some bullshit, and as of yesterday, the holy princess's First Student and viscountess of Chateau la somethin'.” Twilight Sparkle rattled off.

"As of... yesterday. No kiddin' mate- er, your ladyship." Pon-3 nonchalantly scanned the intersection for suspicious ponies. Maybe Twilight Velvet was trying to get leverage on her. "Explains why your paying the tab for this proletarian joint."

Lady Twilight Sparkle poured herself some more coffee. "Sure. Talk a bit quieter, my head hurts." She mumbled. "And you, you are a musician judging by your mark, right? How do you know my mother?"

Pon-3 pulled her cloak to better hide her mark. She had been more than certain that when she had been hired that Twilight Velvet was a too-ambitious social-climber petty noble. Unless the lady Sparkle was lying, Velvet was actually something of a big deal now, the mother of a viscountess. That was a lot more attention, risk, and potential reward. Pon-3 felt a bit giddy. "Oh, professional work. Can't really talk about it. It's covered by non-disclosure and all that." She cleared her throat. "I do solo work. It's a bit indiscreet to discuss it actually. I'd prefer if you didn't mention this happenstance meeting to your mum."

"I wasn't planning on it." Twilight chugged another cup of coffee. "I don't even know your name."

"You might learn it eventually, your ladyship." Pon-3 nodded.

"Cut that out. Title-dropping, I mean. Better, just stop talking for a while. I need some silence." Twilight demanded. Of course the busy street was much louder than their conversation had been. "Uhh, I'm. going to vomit. I should have eaten something." She lay her head on the table.

The situation had become awkward, so Pon-3 decided it was better to disengage. She pushed her chair back.

"Hey, mis." Twilight's voice was muffled by her speaking into the table. "Can I borrow your goggles. The sun is hurting my eyes. Just for a few seconds."

"Err..." The poor mare was acting like a drunk. Pon-3 guessed it was a mix of magical, physical, and mental exhaustion. "Damn lady, you must have really worked for the viscountess thing."
She reluctantly nudged her tinted goggles up, revealing her vibrant red eyes. "If it's just for a few seconds."

"Sorry." Twilight limply accepted the goggles and slid them on. "Wow these are pretty dark. It's a bright day and I can hardly see anything through these."

"I've got sensitive eyes." Pon-3 said quietly.

The awkward silence stretched for nearly fifteen minutes, as Pon-3 watched Twilight Sparkle be miserable across the table.

"Uh, maybe you should go get some sleep at home, your ladyship." Pon-3 offered.

Twilight groaned a bit. "Can't. Leaving the city." Then she sat up. "Oh shoot. I haven't packed yet!" She cringed from her own shouting. "I have got to go. I'll be late. I'll be really late."

"Uh, can I have the goggles back." Pon-3 coughed.

Twilight paused. "Oh, yeah. I would look so goofy arriving at the skydock like this." She gently pulled them off.

"Goofy?" Pon-3 scowled.

Twilight didn't pass her the goggles right away, but just stared into Pon-3 eyes, a flat expression on her face. "Huh. Your eyes... That's a very unique red." She cocked her head. "Like that serial killer from a decade ago. The Red-Eyed killer. Did they ever catch them? I don't remember."

Pon-3 snatched the goggles from Twilight and put them on. "Like I said they're sensitive." She said. "Don't you have to rush to make your skydock rendezvous? I would hate to delay you."

Twilight nodded. "Yup." She poured and downed one last cup of coffee. "Okay. Thank you again. I was going to have a bad day without this." She got up from the table. "Oh, almost forgot why I came here." She reached in her saddlebag and pulled out a bag of bits. "Could you pay off my tab for me? I really am running late now."
Without waiting for the answer, Twilight galloped away, quickly disappearing into the crowd.

Pon-3 regarded the bag of bits. "Rude little mare." She muttered. Yes, she was tempted to keep it, but then Lady Twilight Sparkle might see fit to mention the meeting to her mother, and that was an even more awkward situation that Pon-3 wished to avoid. Twilight was cute enough; It would be a real shame if her name was on the list.

---

Twilight ended up being even later than she had dreaded. Some kind of labor demonstration had been blocking the main Old Town thoroughfare, and Twilight had skirted the area before City Guard and protestors started clashing. Galloping to her little tower, throwing the clothes she had set out in a few travel bags, and making sure there was nothing that would rot while she was away.

"Goodbye." Twilight sighed. By the time she returned, the tower might have been given to somepony else., Twilight started off for the skydock. "It figures that Celestia can't spare even one pony to help me move out. Insult to injury, or visa versa." She said to herself as she dragged the bags across the grass.

Twilight was horrified to find that a small crowd had gathered at the skydock by the time she arrived.
"Uhh, what?" What she hoped would be a meaningful moment with her family had been transformed into a society event. A cluster of nobleponies were standing around and chatting by the wall gate leading out to the skydock platforms. Some guards and imperial functionaries watched from the sidelines, probably sent by Celestia. "The only thing she can be bothered to do is make sure I leave." Twilight huffed.

Everypony turned to look at her at once.

"Uhh..." Twilight felt her wooziness return. She picked up her bags again and timidly trotted past everypony's eyes towards the platform. "Thanks for coming out everypony. See you later."

A pony stepped out in front of her. Fancy Pants. "Lady Sparkle, good morning! I had hoped we would get to talk longer yesterday bu-"

Twilight, flush with nausea, pain from the sunlight, and exhaustion from dragging her bags, let out a venomous hiss. "If you had anything to do with the ponies here, I will turn you inside out, Sir Pants." She jabbed him in the chest. "Yes, good show, I know you have the society and administrative connections. Color me impressed. But if you want to turn this into a contest, I can do impressive things too. I'll do it right here."

Fancy Pants weathered Twilight's abuse. He glanced over to the crowds, who watched silently. He took a few steps backwards, away from them their ears, and Twilight advanced to him again. "I assure you my lady am very discreet. I am a professional, and I do not leak the princess's buisness." He cleared his throat. "I only wished to congratulate you properly."

"Oh, did you." Twilight scoffed.

"Yes of course. You are a vivacious young mare and I see many years of service to the princess ahead of you." Fancy Pants said. "Yes, technically we are of equal stature now, Lord Vizier and Élève Premier. You have clearly embodied that already."

Twilight averted her eyes.

"In any case, we work to the same purposes. Though we may be separate institutions in technicality, I would greatly appreciate you keeping in touch with the administration." Fancy Pants continued. "If you will allow me the flourish, you serve the holy princess, we serve the regal empress."

"You know as well as I do this is a total sham. I'm being sent to run a bloody fair!" Twilight spat. "But yes, you'll be hearing from me with my demands for money, supplies, and ponypower. The princess has said this work is very important, and neither of us wants to get in the way of that."

Fancy Pants sighed to himself. Maybe waiting longer to meet with Twilight would have been wiser. A letter or messenger would kept spit off his face at least. "Naturally. We serve her highness in all-"

"Please, keep reminding me who I serve, the mare who has exiled me from my city." Twilight glared back at the crowds. "Step aside sir, or they may overhear our divisive words. Gossip may spread."

Fancy Pants pursed his lips, but obeyed. "Keep in touch, lady viscountess."

"Yeah yeah." Twilight dragged her bags through the wall gate onto the skydock platform. The lingering guards and administrators stepped forward and kept the crowd of nobles from following her.

But more trails laid ahead of her. Shining Armor and her parents were waiting with Spike by the chariot, as expected. But Foaly Flux and Prosser were standing in the way, chatting.

“I'm too tired to deal with this.” She muttered. But she soldiered forward.

Prosser broke away from Foaly and trotted up to her. "I have an appointment later so I will keep it brief."

"Please do." Twilight eyed the earth pony.
She had nothing to say to Prosser, but no particular vitriol either. Prosser was just a lackadaisical imperial advisor, whose main job for the imperial council was a kind of spymaster of sorts, managing information and rumors. He was the kind of pony with a broad array of random knowledge, a cutting wit, and with something to say about everything in his comical girly soprano voice. He sometimes involved himself in castle intrigues or attended parties, but his overarching goal seemed to be to make everypony as annoyed or confused as possible- A perfect metaphor for the bureaucracy he was stuck in the craws of.

"I saw you chat with Pants up there. Hope he wasn't too green, heh heh. He thinks you're skipping ahead in line. Ponies like him believe in the process, and that good ponies should move slowly up the ranks like he did. What a chump!" Prosser guffawed. "You're going to find a lot of interesting things in Ponyville I suspect. If I know ol' Celestia, she didn't send you there on accident."

Twilight had been preparing a sarcastic retort, but Prosser's point was made a lot of sense. Perhaps she should be thinking about why she had been sent to Ponyville.

"That is all. As I said, brief. So until next time we meet madmoiselle. Au revoir. Don't die. Keep in touch.” Prosser bowed and stepped around her, strolling up the dock towards the city.

Foaly Flux was next. He gave Twilight a wink. "Hey sport."

"You know him?" Twiilght gestured back towards Prosser.

"He's a consultant on some stuff I've got going on. Nothing big. Your mom knows him better from her university days. Heyy, but let's not get stuck on that." Foaly smiled a broad smile. "You're the big cat now, eh? Viscountess! Just a few ranks lower than your duke uncle, am I right? I remember when I got my castles." He nodded towards the spires of the Castle Magoria further along the city wall. "Ahh that was a week I'll tell ya, what with my parents dying. Course, most ponies don't inherit a castle to help cope with that. I mean, you say 'near extinction of the Bright family', I say 'I got a lot of castles'. You get me? Life is full of stuff like that Twilie! Full of it!"

Twilight wasn't sure what to say so she nodded along and hoped her face was looking sad and concerned.

Thankful Foaly's cheer could not be damped. "Ah, but now I've got you and your brother to dote on, eh Twilie? Though it's mostly Velvet and Nighty who come by so I end up doting on them, Heh heh heh! I'll be helping your folks move into your new castle. Pardon 'chateau'. Geeze! The day we started naming stuff around here in Prench was a bad day! Rotten language. Ugh, but the chateau is nice. It's a cute little thing, but your parents will get the respect they deserve putting on galas in that place.”

“Sure, I guess. Thank you for everything you do for us.” Twilight knew, for all his idiosyncrasies, her great-uncle cared greatly for his family. Or at least what remained of it.

“And keep on the lookout while you’re in Ponyville. It's an awfully odd place full of queer ponies. And we mean queer in both the traditional and modern sense.” That drew an amused snort from Twilight and lifted her mood. “I passed though once and had a simply depressing time."

"Was it something about the trip?"

"Nah, about me; my parents had just died."

"Ah."

Foaly pulled her into a hug. "I've taken enough of your time. You're a good kid. If you find anything you think might be useful out in the big world, hold onto it. I'll keep in touch. Promise.” Foaly Flux stepped back and let her pass right up to her chariot where her close family was waiting.

Twilight Velvet and Night Light hung back, as Shining Armor next spoke with Twilight.
“Err, well, I won't mince words Twilie. I know we've been distant lately, with my job and your studies, so I can only hope that we can stay friends through this.” Shining's weak smile wobbled.

Twilight was overcome by his emotion. “You act like it's going to be a year! It's only for a few months.” She threw a big hug around her brother.

This placated Shining somewhat. “Yeah... Not much else to say, see ya.” He took a step back, letting his parents through.

“Be careful, Twilie. It's a big world and this is your first time going without your family.” Night Light offered.

"No it's not." Twilight stuck out her tongue.

"Oh?" Night Light smiled. "Must be my parental instincts clouding my mind, as you put it that one time."

"Pesky parental instincts. Speaking of which..." Twilight agreed, turning to her mother next. "Uh, Hey. Bet you're pretty torn up."

“Now Twilie, this is not the time to be rude. I am sorry if I was not respecting your feelings last night. In return, will you respect mine?" Velvet said. "Never forget how much I love you, and don't forget to keep a mind on home, and all the things that will be waiting for you. Things will only get better for us.” Velvet broke into a thin grin. "There is a lot for us to talk about, like your castle and new status in society, but that can all wait until you've done us proud in the eyes of the Princess."

'I'm always doing you proud.' Twilight was going to quip, but then Velvet would try to get the last word again and the whole thing would be drawn out. Instead Twilight chose silence and a hug.

She gave her last farewells to her family and hopped on the chariot. Spike had gotten in already, and had drifted off to sleep in the time she was saying her goodbyes. That eliciting a pained chuckle from Twilight- She had worked her poor assistant to exhaustion helping with the essays.

Twilight turned to give the 'all clear for takeoff' to the pegasi pulling the chariot, but instead turned and found herself face to face with Prosser.

“Oh hoh! One more thing I wanted to say!" Prosser laughed through bared teeth. He was far too close for comfort.

Twilight's foul mood billowed up again. "Hey, piss off. You said you had an appointment."

"A little white lie. You needn't wound me so, Twilight." Prosser said.

"Next time use my proper titles, Sir Prossor, you don't stop at the Lady Sparkle." Twilight encased the earth pony in her magic and moved him out of her personal space. "Goodbye."

"But it's about Celestia." Prosser said.

Obviously that made Twilight hesitate. "Grrh." She hissed. "I know she is watching from up on that tower. She is probably listening somehow too. If I am looking for silver linings I know I will be free of it in Ponyville, unless she has agents there."

"Twilight, you will be the agent there. You have to start thinking on a higher level." Prosser chuckled. "So let's think. The princess is hiding something. Fancy Pants is too much of a coward to ask directly, so I will. What are Celestia's premonitions? What is coming?"

Twilight actually considered telling the annoying earth pony the truth, about the Nightmare Pretender and her return. If there was one pony who would actually believe such a claim, it would be Prosser.
But no. It would expose them both to danger. "Find out for yourself, sir. Now please let me go, you're creeping out my family."

Expressions of annoyance, anger, and disappointment flashed across Prosser's face. He sighed and pulled on his smile again. "You thought about it. Ohh, you thought about it. If the threat doesn't attack between now and when you get back, I intend to tease that enticing secret from you, Lady Twilight Sparkle."

Suddenly, he whipped a riding crop out from under his cloak. Twilight eyes widened, as she feared he would begin to lash at her, but instead Prosser turned and smacked the leftmost driver pegasus hitched to the chariot.
With a startled whinny, the draughtponies blasted off, carrying Twilight south towards Ponyville.

Prosser laughed maniacally, cracking the crop in the air. Twilight's family slowly backed away, and the gallery of ponies dispersed. Posser stayed for another quarter hour, tracking the chariot making its way to the horizon.

---

Pon-3 returned to her hideout shortly before noon. Her saddlebags were weighed down with bottles full of various pest-killers, more makeup dyes for disguises, and some rope. She was vibrating with anticipation for the job she was soon to preform.

"Killer. I'm a trained killer. Cool, deadly, edgy. You tell your kids about Pon-3 to frighten them into behaving." She said to herself in a gravelly voice as she mixed some of the poisons. "Nopony knows her name or her face. They just know her calling card: Death!"
Most of it was aspirational.

After the coffee shop, she had done a little stakeout on her first target, a rotund unicorn noble named Deeper Frie Fellowship. According to the beggars and rumor mongers, Sir Fellowship was a civic-minded petty noble and a vocal member of the Black Horn Council, an Estates interest group. Indeed once Pon-3 tracked him down, she had tailed Sir Fellowship as he waddled from the council hall to a tavern, where he dined with and wooed a visiting Baltimare merchant, promising them access to imperial politics in exchange for cash.

Pon-3, while prone to exaggeration, had not been lying to Twilight Velvet about her exploits in Griffany. She was no stranger to dispensing yokel politicians on behalf of a rival. But for somepony of Velvet's ambitions, Deeper Frie Fellowship seemed small fry.

"Who am I to question. I got payed, I'll provide the service. Yup, service with a smile." Pon-3 nodded to herself. Maybe once she worked her way down the list, Lady Twilight Velvet's intentions would become clearer.

---

The chariot ride to Ponyville was not at all to Twilight Sparkle's liking. She had hoped that it would be a pleasant ride, which would provide her with with time for a nap. Instead, the pegasi pulling the chariot (probably agents who were also watching her) insisted on flying much too fast and close to the ground. They rose and fell as they hugged the terrain, sometimes having to swerve to avoid particularly tall trees. It stressed Twilight, as she was constantly fearing a crash. She could only be glad that Spike had managed to sleep unconcerned by their volatile voyage.

First they passed over the verdant lands below Canterlot, a landscape of farmland tracts and forest clumps, stretching from the base of the Mountain into an expanse of gently rolling hills. This region, the Canter, was named after one of the many small rivers which coursed off the Mountain and fed the Dneighper River. Wheat, beets, and grapes were grown on different sides of the hills, tended to by the unicorn farmers who sold their produce to Canterlot. These lands had been the domain of the Principality of Canterlot since before Equestria united and the capital was designated- The Canter lands were direct fiefs of Celestia.

The chariot continued southwesterly. The terrain mellowed. The farms became sparser and the trees thicker, until they were over unbroken forest. Here and there Twilight spotted a clearing or skyward trail of smoke which would indicate a village hidden in the pine and oak jungle.

Twilight looked back at Canterlot, growing smaller, difficult to distinguishable from the other bumps and ridges on the Mountain.
Flowing off Canterlot's plateau, descending as waterfalls to the valley floor, were those dozens and dozens of creeks and little rivers, supplied by the frequent rainstorms which broke over the spine of the mountain range. One was the Canter River, one was the Dneighper River, and the chariot flew over the point where they met and merged- They left the Canter, Celestia's land, and entered the Dneighper River Valley, a region of undistinguished villages and petty lordships.

The Dneighper River itself flowed west by southwest from Canterlot for eighty kilometers, then turned and ran southeast. After several hundred kilometer it returned to meandering westward, with a southward tendency, until it reached the western ocean.
Somewhere along that course, near where where the Dneighper turned from south to west, was Twilight destination: The 'Free City' of Ponyville, the chariot's destination.

"This feels wrong. I feel like I should be bound up in chains." Twilight said to herself, the words lost to the rushing wind around the chariot.
Maybe... she didn't have the right attitude. Every misery and ache she felt was self-caused. But such self-doubt did not make her feel any better.
Twilight had to look on the positive side, if only to keep herself from a depressive break. Ponyville, an out of the way settlement, would have none of the factional infighting and intrigue as Canterlot. She could rest easy knowing all her enemies were hundreds of kilometers away. Maybe she would grow to appreciate the rural life.

But the fact was, the Nightmare was coming regardless of her outlook.

At the two hour mark of Twilight's chariot ride, they passed over the Dneighper on its north-south run, from the east bank to the west bank. The river was some nine meters across at this point, but deep and swift. Twilight spied several barges being poled up the river, most likely carrying goods to Canterlot. Indeed, river trade had made the valley very rich in past times, but recent investment in overland routes had starved many river communities.

On the other side of the river the land became hilly once more, though the forest remained thick. The third hour of the trip was passed with the forest hills opening up into grassy hills, covered in vibrant flowers. Twilight would have found it beautiful if she had not been so grumpy.

After four harrowing hours, they arrived.
Ponyville came into view as they crested the last hill. The chariot circled several times, giving Twilight a good view of her the village that would her home for at least the next few months.

The "free city" was tiny compared to Canterlot. Ponyville contained a hundred cottages by rough estimate, most of them clustered around a few main streets, then rapidly becoming less dense around the edges. More cottages could be seen scattered along the landscape. It faced hills on three sides and the Dneighper River on its south, over which a small stone bridge stood. In fact the bridge was the only fully stone structure in the entire city, the rest being constructed of wood, plaster, and thatch. Only a few things stood out: a multistory rotunda in the center of a central plaza, a proud windmill, and an overly large oak tree occupying it's own little square.

Twilight could distinguish no reason why this hamlet could possibly deserve Imperial Free City status on the level of Baltimare or Filly Delphia. It qualified in Twilight's mind as a mere provincial village: It didn't even have a city wall or mayoral palace. Heck, it didn't even have a granary.

"Wow... I knew I'd be out in the boondocks, but I wasn't expecting this." Twilight muttered to herself. "Celestia really wants to send a message I guess. Bright side, no politics. Have to remember that. Have to hold on to that."

The final pass took them down to street level, and the chariot set down in the main avenue. The street was empty, save for a few ponies, who couldn't even spare a glance for the royal chariot landing amongst them.

Twilight roused Spike from his sleep and with the help of the two pegasi they pulled all of their luggage out. Twilight had insisted they pack light, so only two bags accompanied them. They would be relying on local purchases for most of their stay.

"Gosh, where are we." Spike rubbed his eyes. "Is this the edge of town?"

"No, this is the center. It doesn't get any more built up than this." Twilight said. She turned to the pegasi pulling the chariot. "I wouldn't suppose that-"

With a sweep of their wings, the pegasi pulled the chariot into the air, filling the air around Twilight with dust. She shielded her eyes. The chariot circled the town once and arced north back towards Canterlot.

"I suddenly feel very vulnerable." Spike shivered.

“It will be fine. Celestia arranged for our lodging. This place has a burgermeister or mayor we can ask.” Twilight sighed. "Besides, what pony would leave a viscountess out in the cold?" She looked around, trying to match her surroundings with what she'd seen from the air. Choosing a direction, she broke into a trot while Spike followed with the bags. As they passed through to the 'town center', Twilight's assessment remained the same: Small village totally unworthy of Free City status, let alone being the host city of a Summer Sun Fair.
The Ponyvillians seemed unconcerned with her arrival, apparently ignorant of what a Canterlot noblepony deserved. Twilight usually never bothered with such attention, but noticed its absence nonetheless.

Arriving at the rotunda, apparently the town hall, Twilight noticed the lack of guards at the entrance. She strolled inside, finding herself in an auditorium. It was completely empty, and smelled slightly of mildew.
"Oh good grief. Maybe I really have been exiled. It would take weeks to hoof it back to Canterlot." Twilight grumbled. She searched room by room. There were piles of old paperwork, cobweb-covered desks, and a mold-covered sandwich in the back offices.
She ran back out of the hall and confronted a passing pony. “Excuse me. Excuse me! Can we talk for a moment? I'm looking for the mayor.” Twilight waved.

The tan earth pony with navy and pink hair looked adverse. “Okay. Good to know."

Twilight felt her headache coming back. "Yeah, so where are they?"

"Mmm, I might know, if you ask nicely,” The earth pony tapped their chin.

“Please, peasant, tell me where the mayor is.” Twilight sneered, in no mood for a chat.

The earth pony made a hurt expression. “Ugh, some ponies. He's out preparing for the empress.”

“What? Celestia is coming here?” Twilight balked.

The pony suddenly spoke with great enthusiasm. "Yeah! The princess is coming to Ponyville to arrange a fair. That's what I heard anyway. Too cool, right?”

“Thats... Not right." Twilight shook her head. "I came here, on her behalf. Now, where is the mayor.”

“I dunno. Town hall?” The pony abruptly broke off the conversation and pranced off.

Spike caught up, panting from the exertion of hauling the bags. "You could help me out, you know."

Twilight was wrapped up in her own thoughts, her hoof tapping nervously. "So apparently there's been a miscommunication and these provincials were expecting the princess to come in person."

Spike dropped the bags and sat in the dirt. "Heh, that's kinda funny. Imagine the looks on their faces when they learned they had less than a day to prepare."

Twilight did not find it as funny. Country ponies could be very superstitious, and held their princess in deep reverence. If Twilight told them their expectations were for naught they might react in anger. “It stands to reason that if they expected Celestia here, they would provide the largest house for her use. Drop those off in the town hall, and we can pick them up when we find our accommodations.”

Spike complied. “So, are we going to walk around town, judging the cottages against each other, or are we going to ask somepony?"

Twilight cleared her throat and called out to another pony resting reading a book on the steps of a cottage. "Excuse me? Could you come over here for a second?"

The pony looked up from her book.

"Yes, you." Twilight beaconed. "I was wondering-"

The pony stood up and went inside their cottage, slamming the door behind them.

"Wow. That's pretty rude." Spike blinked.

Now the Ponyvillians strolling the streets were keeping their distance from Twilight and Spike, standing on the edges of the plaza space, watching silently.

"Now I'm actually starting to get creeped out." Spike whispered.

Twilight tried to reassure him. "You know how country ponies are. Xenophobic, insular, distrustful of outsiders. In all likelihood the only Canterlot ponies they see are tax agents."

"But weren't they expecting the princess?"

Twilight looked around. The ponies watching from a distance were somewhat familiar. Yes, they were all ponies who she had already seen walking the streets.
They were surveillance. The Ponyvillians (or maybe Celestia) had assigned ponies to conspicuously watch her movements.

"Okay, the sooner we find somepony in charge the better. If this goes on any longer I'm going to lose my patience for real." Twilight said to herself. "If that happens I'll set something on fire and let the important ponies come to me."
She chose another direction. "Okay, let's look down this street next."

---

Twilight Velvet and Night Light hopped down from their carriage onto the stone path to Chateau la Garde.

Like the other castles embedded into Canterlot's city wall, the 'chateau' had been built out of what had been a tower.
The Tour la Garde (as it had been known) was on the extreme south-eastern end of the city, where the plateau transitioned into the sloping road that led down the Mountain into the Canter. The tower had contained and protected Canterlot's main gate, and the only land access to the plateau or the city. It was therefore the most important tower of them all, and had been kept under the princess's control when all the other wall towers were sold to the nobles.
In 670 SS, long after peace had been established in Equestria and there was no plausible threat to the city, the tower became a temporary grant to subjects held in high esteem in light of its symbolic importance. The sun empress of the time, Celestia CXII, granted the castle to her protege and majordomo, a position which would morph into the position of Élève Premier. Habit became ceremony, and soon the Chateau was always granted to the First Student of the empire.

But the most recent First Student, the noble daughter Lady Sunset Shimmer, had betrayed the princess in an unprecedented way. Her family had been rapidly evicted from the Chateau la Garde and sent from the city for their own safety. For years it had sat vacant, just as the position of First Student had. What became of Lady Shimmer, nopony knew.

That weight of historical context loomed over Twilight Velvet and Night Light as they approached the boxy stone keep.

Night Light had been content with the townhome he and his wife shared at the edge of the city, but Velvet insisted they move into their daughter's castle immediately. It was not half the size of Castle Magoria, and couldn't hold a candle to Canterlot Castle, but Chateau la Garde was still a formidable fortifications in its own right. It even came with a mildly pretentious Prench name that all the jealous courtiers would stretch their tongues saying.

"New base of operations." Velvet chuckled softly. "I was starting to feel slightly guilty about my deeds in the house Twilie and Shining grew up in."

"The townhouse was already a pain to maintain on your university stipends. I hope the princess understands the need for us to access Twilie's privileges." Night Light said.

Velvet pushed open the doors into the foyer of the castle. The stone room was entirely devoid of furniture, as was the keep as a whole.
But somepony had set a trio of elegant chairs in the grand hall beyond the foyer, facing the entrance. Sitting atop one of those chairs, hooves cross in polite expectation, was Fancy Pants.

"Lady Velvet and Lord Light. So nice to see you again. I hope this day has found you well." Fancy Pants twiddled his mustache. "There is barely a degree of separation between us, through young Lady Twilight, and yet we meet so infrequently. Last time must have been Duke Flux's birthday."

“Delivering a housewarming gift, sir?” Twilight Velvet made a cautious approach, her husband several paces behind.

Fancy Pants shook his head. “Not quite, my lady. You should be warned this house may not be warmed for some time."

“With a claim as grand as that, I would appreciate an explanation. I would hate to misinterpret it.” Velvet said, eyes narrowed. She took one of chairs while Night Light elected to stand by her side.

Fancy Pants nodded, sitting up him his chair and straightening his fancy shirt. "My Lady, I will be as frank as possible. I think you are being a bit preemptive moving into Chateau la Garde. Your name is not even on the title yet.”

“You mean my daughter's name.” Velvet sneered. “Unless you are implying something.”

“No, no. You're quite right. I misspoke.” Fancy Pants soothed. “All I mean to say is that there are procedures for this sort of thing”

“Meaningless.” Twilight Velvet responded.

“With all respect, it is a done deal, Sir Pants.” Night Light contributed. “This will be my daughter's castle. Has it not been the empress's will?”

“And the empress's will be done. However I'm not talking about bureaucratic procedures. By the princess, let all know it is not I who would frustrate you or your daughter.” Fancy Pants adjusted a cufflink idly.

“Obviously not.” Velvet said.

Fancy Pants nodded. “Yes, yes. We are speaking directly of course, which means I may forsake propriety as I continue."

“Yes, we are being direct, and we are being frank. Could we be less evasive as well? I will not tolerate half-truths.” Velvet, a pony notorious for half truths, said.

Fancy Pants cleared his throat. “Assuredly, there are ponies out there who would like this castle to themselves.” He gestured around the spacious and empty room. “Chateau la Garde's strategic value is mediocre now that we have airships that host pegasus squadrons, but its symbolic value is immeasurable. Being granted this castle is a statement of trust from her highness. She did not make that statement to you, Lady Velvet. She made it to your daughter.”

"You will save my inferences and tell me what you mean by that." Velvet said.

“Equestria is at peace. Well, it may be so in letter...” Fancy Pants leaned in conspiratorially. “But not in spirit, Lady Velvet! Vermin secessionists nibble at the edges! The Black Horn Council, the Riverpony Lords, and damnable coastal republicans are challenging the legitimacy of her highness. It has not been proven, but they and innumerable other conspirators have come together in unholy alliance against their common foe, our holy empire. The only thing that stands between the fifth column inside Canterlot to the skulking traitors in the countryside is THIS VERY GATEHOUSE."

"Oh my!" Night Light blinked.

"They will try to buy it from you. They will try to cheat it from you. Failing everything else, the traitors may try to intimidate you into surrendering the Chateau la Garde." Fancy Pants intoned. "While the ink is not yet dry on the title, the traitors may move their pawns in the Estates to suspend your regency, citing some administrative nonsense. Being conspicuous and moving in immediately has only drawn their attention." He tapped his hoof emphatically. "My lady, my lord, that is the danger I speak of, which jeopardizes you daughter's rights.”

Twilight Velvet nodded agreeably, but her expression was completely unreadable. At a glance Night Light could tell she was concealing her rage. "I see. I should hope that does not keep us out of the Chateau indefinitely." She licked her lips. "Or, that is what I would say. Sir, the Black Horn Council is a joke. I have no intention to be afraid of disgraced Legitimists like the Black Horns."

Fancy Pants, whether he was expecting that reaction or not, was also stoic. "The Black Horn Council deserves no respect, but regardless they command several Speakers of the Estates. That should give you pause."

“The Estates are even more of a joke. Have the inept Speakers done anything besides pat themselves on the back?” Velvet asked sarcastically.

Now Fancy Pants was looking somewhat bothered. “The Estates may my life difficult, if nothing else. I would not underestimate that meddlesome body of nobles, Lady Sparkle. You haven't made very many friends with imperial loyalists, and now that you are benefitting from her highness's generosity, all the empress's detractors will make common cause against you, as I said.”

“Oh dear, that does sound bad.” Night Light shivered. He took the vacant seat.

“Your daughter is relatively young to be receiving the title of l'Élève Premier. The Estates will capitalize on this and attack her character, try to assert that the city gate house belongs under a different regency. They may reach out to the Canterlot Merchants or city guard. A dozen different factions want control over traffic in or out, and will be willing to cut a deal with the Black Horns to get it. There is only so much pressure Princess Celestia will sustain before she accedes and gives somepony else regency. After that, the traitors will strike! What low ponies, they play a longer game than simply ruining your daughter's life. How soon before rebel soldiers march into Canterlot at their lesure? Moving armies into the city has always been the hardest part of any coup plan.”
Fancy Pants paused. Twilight Velvet watched him intently. When it seemed she had no response, he continued. “Throughout this process, the Black Horn Council will likely reach out to you as well. They may assume you are an irascible villain or traitor like them. For your daughters sake, you will surely rebuff them though."

Velvet against his expectations, smirked. “Oh, I think I understand now. You have no leverage!" She laughed. "Is this truly what you resort to, sir? Telling scary stories and half-conceived stories?"

Fancy Pants sniffed. “That is an unbecoming claim, my Lady.”

“You started the whole conversation claiming the chateau only has symbolic value, then contradict yourself. If you thought I would be intimidated by your cavalcade of looming threats, you are unfortunatly mistaken. Your whole narrative of a grand conspiracy rings hollow." Velvet stood up and paced around the chairs, forcing Fancy Pants to crane his neck around whenever she passed behind him.
"Firstly, Blueblood and Fellowship of the Black Horn Council may be ambitious racists, but they are utter cowards. They have been doing fine for themselves mucking about in local politics. Why risk that by drawing imperial attention to themselves?"

"They have been repeatedly caught bribing Speakers in the Estates." Fancy Pants pointed out.

"And that no punishments were meted out speaks to how pitiful and unimportant the Estates are. What are their powers? Legislative? Executive? Advisory? Nay! It is barely more than a country club for the restless pettifoggers and sophists. Have you even once enforced a law they passed?" Velvet arched a brow. "No, you have not. Like this castle, they are a mere symbol. Their claim to speak for Equestria is deluded pretension."
She leaned on her husband's chair in a flip of their previous poses. "The Estates have no leverage, against the princess, against me, or anypony else. If they send me an order I will rip it up. If they send their bailiff I will whip her and send him back."

Fancy Pants's frown tightened.

"Oh come on now Sir, I am sure you know this. I await your counter-claim." Velvet cooed.

"I would simply warn you against Ponyanna-ish delusion." Fancy Pants sighed. "My previous warnings stand. Her highness herself has spoken of them."

"Oh very good. She shall surely be dealing with the traitors then. As she did Sunset Shimmer? Confiscation and banishment! As she did Princess Cadenza's would-be suiters? Banishment and imprisonment! Did you get a good look at the face of that drunken sop who tried to kill you at the royal gala when the princess impaled him on her horn?" Velvet's expression morphed into a haunting grin. "Princess Celestia has a history of rapid, brutal punishment. And yet..." She cocked her head, pantomiming listening for a distant call. "Silence."

Fancy Pants sighed again. Velvet knew what she was talking about. "Silence."

"What you will find, however, is that a legitimate threat against Twilie or her family will break that silence much sooner than a threat against you." Velvet chuckled. "When the princess is driven to action, it is always over something very personal."

Fancy Pants pursed his lips. "That may not hold true, Lady Velvet."

"I am clever enough to recognize a pattern." She laughed. "Okay, now that that is all out of the way. Let us start talking about housewarming gifts! Start throwing numbers and I will tell you if I find them acceptable."

"Excuse me?' Fancy Pants gasped. Was she asking for a bribe?

"Vizier Pants, you are obvious very concerned about treason. I am retired from my teaching position, as you well know, so I am sure to have lots of time. Hire me." Velvet explained. "I can be your tripple agent against the traitors who come to solicit my help. If they are truly so dangerous, you will have no qualms paying for my support against them."

Fancy Pants leaned back in his seat, silently shocked by Velvet's bold request. He came expecting some cajoling, some intimidation, and some sweet-talking would bring Night Light and Twilight Velvet to his side eventually. But no, Velvet was just as aware of the situation as he was. "My lady, I should say you are over the line right now."

"I can do much worse than be over the line. You upset me." Velvet's grin turned savage. "If you and I get into a spat, sir, whose side do you think the princess will come down on?"

"Why I-"

"Don't waste your words! Celestia has a weak point, and it is my Twilie. I have great leeway, Sir Pants. The princess would not even imagine lifting a hoof against me, lest she estrange my daughter further." Velvet watched him squirm. "Yes, you can not even bring yourself to call out my arrogance, because you know it is true. Celestia may hesitate, but she will abandon you easily. Then I will have this chateau and you will have nothing. Good day sir."

"What outrageous words." Fancy Pants had never felt so constrained. Velvet's glare felt like it was burning right through him. "You play traitor, loyalist, and mercenary at your convenience? Have you no loyalty? You would not have your castle without the princess, but you treat her favor as a tool! Horrid!"

Velvet snorted. It pleased her greatly that Fancy Pants had already begun to referring to the a Chateau as her's. "Is her highness going to take it from me?"

Fancy Pants was silent for a long moment, then sighed. "I can not name a price."

"Try."

"I can not name a price." Fancy Pants repeated, more firmly. "That isn't how this works."

"Teach an amateur like me how it works then." Velvet mockingly begged.

"I can offer you benefits of service. Loyalty has benefits, not payouts." Fancy Pants said.

Vlevet snorted. "Ah, so the imperial armies march for 'benefits' and not their pay. Good to know."

"Do not get impudent with me Lady Velvet." Fancy Pants tried to regain some facade of authority. "Now, I have thought of a very clever arrangement that will please you immensely."

"I need it in writing." Velvet insisted.

"You will have it in writing, and in return I will receive your promises in writing." Fancy Pants said. "So let us be clear. You are offering..."

"I will engage the Black Horn Council and other traitor groups in Canterlot an expose their anti-imperial members. I will also solicit to any ponies in the wider Equestria who might want special access for suspicious reasons, and report them as well." Velvet said flatly. "Does that sounds to your liking?"

"It sounds to me like the chance to uproot seditious activity in Equestria once and for all, provided you are tempting enough. The wording needs modification but that is what I desired." Fancy Pants nodded.

"Happy to please. You can trust me to make the real estate sound irresistibly tempting, yes." Velvet smiled. "Now, you offer me something back?"

"Quick learner." Fancy Pants stood up and began trotting to the door. He paused at the door, leaving it half open as he collected his thoughts. "Lady Velvet, a clever pony once told me that the best way to neutralize the avarice and ambition of the aristocracy was to bring them into the system. That way their energy would be spend on improving the state rather than fighting against it."

"I have no interest in a court position or administrative post, sir." Velvet said.

"I would not be so churlish. However you would hardly pass up the opportunity to be ply the rhetorical skill you were renowned for at the university at the Estates. Among the Estates perhaps?" Fancy Pants wondered aloud. "As a member of the landed nobility you would be able to represent yourself there." He pretended to ponder it further. "I am certain you would be interested in receiving some of the titles and land from the traitors you expose. That would incentivize you, surely." With that said, he made a hasty exit.

"A pleasure, Vizier Pants." Velvet bowed in his direction.

---

Once the door closed behind him, Fancy Pants was galloping away from the Chateau la Garde, down the path to his awaiting carriage.
Unexpectedly, there was already a pony inside. Prosser.

“I think one of us must have the wrong carriage.” Fancy Pants remarked coldly.

“Get in, you twit.” Prossor grumbled.

Fancy Pants complied and closed the carriage door. Once It began to move Prosser began to talk.
“You thought it best to go to talk to Twilight Velvet by yourself. I bet you had an exciting ride in there."

"I don't want to hear it." Fancy Pants growled.

"Oh you poor stallion. She ambushed you bad, didn't she." Prosser giggled at his fellow counclepony's misery. "My dear Pants, you have that self-loathing look on your face of whenever you feel wronged. You had it yesterday too, after seeing the princess."

"Would you like me to defenestrate you from this carriage? I am not a strong pony, but a pony guided by anger can do remarkable things." Fancy Pants warned.

Prosser bit his lip to keep himself from laughing. "Oh my goodness... She absolutely butchered you, didn't she. You poor poor pony. You have made things worse for yourself by far."

Fancy Pants didn't want to argue any longer. "Yes, I will admit I was lulled into a false sense of security. I thought I knew the family."

Prosser went easier on his whipped friend. "You know Night Light well enough."

"Well yes. He was an up-and-coming fencer at the Unicorn School while I was an advisor there." Fancy Pants sighed. "However I don't believe we met formally until the funeral."

"Ah, the great Bright Family funeral." Prosser recalled, nodding along.

"It was before your office. Oh what a commotion is was, in its own way." Fancy Pants allowed himself to be distracted by the story rather than dwell on the present. "Night Light, one of the most eligible bachelors in Canterlot, was marrying a virtual no-name Twilight Velvet. Everypony was wondering who she was and how she had beguiled the Bright clan. Embarrassing to find out, they loved each other. Then the deaths of the Brights! Joys turns to sorrow." Fancy Pants went on. "But to the point of Velvet and Light, I may have met them once or twice, but the next time I heard paid attention must have been in the wake of Cloud Creshe, and their daughter being taken in as Princess Celestia's new protege."

"And you did not think to investigate them at all?" Prosser asked.

"I was not the lord vizier then, you cad. It stings to admit but Lady Twilight Sparkle has been around the palace longer than I have. By the time I got to where I am, she had already been with the princess for years. Did I really have a reason to suspect her or her family?" Fancy Pants sighed again. "Why concern myself with that lot when I had so much more to preoccupy me?"

"You sir, have been a fool. What does the Empire matter if you can not even keep track of one family?" Prosser chortled.

Fancy Pants was tempted to make good on his threat to toss Prosser out of the moving carriage. “Tell me, colleague-mine, all the things you should have told me BEFORE I went in."

"Twilight Velvet is a bully. She pretends there is some great mystery she is keeping, but the truth of it is she just enjoys being bossy." Prosser shared. "She was a rhetor at the Unicorn School and a courier in Foaly Flux's court for a few years. That's where she met Night Light." Prosser kicked his legs up and reclined in the cushy seat. "We used to get into shouting matches in front of the Opera House. It was like a primeval dominance ritual, to see who could be the most bellicose and obnoxious."

Unbidden, images of the waifish Prosser being abused by Velvet filled to Fancy Pants's mind. "Then perhaps you should have been the one to go in and negotiate."

"Negotiating with ponies is not in my job description, but I could try my hoof at it, just for fun. Tell me though, how badly did it go? I am burning to know what she swindled you for." Prosser teased.

Fancy Pants grit his teeth. "Land and titles."

"Oh?"

"From everypony she outs as a traitor." Fancy Pants said.

Prossor spat, much to Fancy Pants disgust. "That's it?"

"Excuse me?"

"By the way you were moaning I thought you'd promised her a seat on the Imperial Council and your firstborn child." Prosser almost sounded disappointed. "You did not even pay anything up front. I don't understand anymore why you're upset."

Fancy Pants scowled. "Now maybe you don't understand because you aren't too clever yourself. Velvet, nor Sparkle for that matter, would not have even a single castle if I had my way. My work to consolidate imperial power where I can continues to be undone by the princess's thoughtless whim. Yes, I did not get my way, because Princess Celestia cannot tear her mind off little Twilight Sparkle. Now that she has one castle, Velvet aims to catapult herself into further status, and I trotted right into her web."

Prosser smiled as though he had caught Fancy Pants saying something wrong. "It sounds to me like your gripe is with Celestia and not the Twilight-Brights."

"Am I to feel otherwise?!" Fancy Pants hissed. "Princess Celestia has withdrawn herself from court, and every petty noble in Canterlot is flirting with treasonous landed lords. I have a gripe with EVERYPONY right now for making my job so hard." He huffed. "I would suspect you of being payed to be obstructionist, if I did not know you simply do it for fun."

"Life is tolerable by novelty or purpose." Prosser shrugged.

"I would like to see you peddle your narcissistic nihilism on any other job." Fancy Pants was getting worked up. "I try to be an accommodating stallion. I am nice, kind... And receive grief in return." He shook his head. "I will straighten this city out, but I need leverage! With information to present to the princess she will give me free rein to clean out all the scum. That is why, no matter how bad a deal I get, I will use Twilight Velvet's information. Soon enough she will be the only traitor left, and she will have no refuge."

Prosser squeezed his eyes shut and snickered silently. "My boy you are in your own fantasy land." He opened his eyes and was taken aback at how deadly serious Fancy Pants looked. "Good heavens, you are serious about all this! Sir Pants, you are grasping at unlikely solutions to dreamed-at threats. You are more out of touch than Celestia."

"Do not take the princess's name so lightly, councilor! I do this because I am a dedicated servant." Fancy Pants said. "If a coup occurs, I know you will be fine because nopony ever could see you as a threat. But I am a visible servant of the princess, the Lord Vizier, and so many ponies who wish to replace me-"

"Ah ha!" Prosser cried out. "You're worried about being replaced. That's the extent of your bellyaching about 'traitors'. Nopony can credibly threaten an alicorn princess, but they sure as hell can threaten you. Especially now, when Celestia has just sidestepped you by elevating a new Élève Premier."

Fancy Pants stewed in silence.

Prosser nodded knowingly. Now that he had Fancy Pants humbled, he could extend a helping hoof. "There there, old chum, I entirely sympathize. Just as you said, I would be a poor fit for any other job, and if you are overthrown I may get tossed out with the bathwater?"

"You certainly are a baby." Fancy Pants muttered.

"Sir Pants, I know a pony." Prosser tapped his chin. "An agent. Yes, what you need is an agent, and I have somepony who would be a good fit for you."

Fancy Pants turned his nose up. "I have ill need of the kind of pony you would know."

"Don't be presumptuous. I know her because she was gunning for me. Literally! Former Guild mare." Prosser put special emphasis on the last words, drawing a deep frown from Fancy Pants . "If you are truly in dire straits then you may have to resort to dire tools."

"Former Guild mare." Fancy Pants repeated to himself. He stared out the carriage window for a few moments. "Perhaps. I am an agent of the law, and there is no justice in extra-judicial murder. If I am going to bring the traitors down it has to be the right way."

"That attitude is going to undo you." Prosser predicted.

"Time will tell. Sent me the agent to me, I will decide from there." Fancy Pants said. "At the very least guild ponies are supposed to be good at espionage. They can spy on Twilight Velvet and give me some leverage."

"Again with Twilight Velvet. You are fixated." Prosser tisked.

Fancy Pants sighed. "Get out. I have plans to work out."

"Fine fine fine. But I advise you to take a step back and examine how much of your villains are real and how many are imagined.." Prossor jabbed the ceiling of the carriage, and they rolled to a stop. "I'll leave you with those words of wisdom.”

"Oh yes, wise sage. Farewell, until the council meeting this afternoon." Fancy Pants deadpanned.

Prosser, opened the door but hesitated before exiting. They were near the Old Town and the crowds parting around the carriage were a thick throng. “Pants... You know Twilight Velvet kills ponies, right?"

Fancy Pants considered his words for a while. "There are rumors about what happened to her mother."

"And the Bright clan. And Sunset Shimmer, though those are more tenuous." Prosser said gravely. "It'll be a rare moment that I plan ahead, Pants, and you don't. If you take a swing at her, finish her off... or you will take a grievous hit back."

“Morbid bastard. I serve the princess and the law. Lady Twilight Velvet will get exactly what she deserves.” Fancy Pants slammed the carriage door shut, and rolled off. “Goodness gracious. What unpleasant ponies this city attracts.”

Prosser was left standing on the crowded streets, getting pushing in multiple directions. "Heavens help us if Velvet gets everything she deserves." He sighed. "Now to scare up that agent I promised. What was Mis Heatstrings's address again?"

---

Twilight and Spike tried to act as nonchalant as possible as they strolled down the Ponyville street, hoping to see somepony who would help them. Behind them, keeping a hundred-meters distance, were the ponies stalking them. Otherwise, the streets were completely empty, as though everypony had been abducted. There were vender's stalls and humble stoorfronts, all closed up for the day.

"Maybe it's a local holliday." Spike speculated. "Like, a feast day? Is that something they have in the countryside?"

"At least this place seems more civilized than it did from the chariot." Twilight remarked nervously, trying not to look back at the ponies tailing them again. She felt like she was being hunted.

"We should ask them what they want and where everypony is." Spike tapped his talons together.

Twilight doubted the ponies would let her near, nor answer any questions if she confronted them. She would have to get one alone and be assertive. "Follow me this way Spike."
They continued down the road, but as they came to an intersection, Twilight ducked behind the corner with Spike and teleported into a nearby alleyway.

"Hyuch-" Spike dry heaved from the unexpected teleport. They were in the tight space between two cottages, where some tools and cloth sacks had been piled. "P- Please warn me when you're going to do that." He whispered.

"Quiet, listen." Twilight shushed him.

"Did they double back to their chariot?" Ponies' voices carried from the street they had just been on. "But it took off."

"What if they're headed to her parent's house or the forest? What do they know?" Another voice asked fearfully.

"They coulda went any which-way. We've just got to find them and keep tabs. That's all she asked, that's all we'll do." A third voice said assertively.

Twilight and Spike heard the echoes of hooves on uneven pavers as the ponies following them split up down the various alleys.

Twilight smirked as a grey and yellow pegasus mare turned the corner into the alley she was in. "Gotchya." She said, grabbing the mare with her magic and pulling her closer. "What is going on around here?"

"H- Hey, this is assault!" The grey mare protested.

"Don't raise your voice. I cast a spell that dampens sound." Twilight said sharply. She cleared her throat. "I asked you what's going on around here. I compel you to answer in the name of the princess."

"T- The princess?" The mare squeaked.

Twilight released her telekinetic grip. "Let's start simple. Where have all the villagers gone?"

"... to... to the welcome party." The mare said reluctantly, averting her eyes.

"The party for who?" Twilight demanded.

"I don't know." The mare said.

Twilight sighed. "Okay fine. Why were you guys following me then?"

"Just... neighborhood watch stuff. We keep a lookout for suspicious ponies." The mare said, looking everywhere but at Twilight. "I mean, you've been acting suspicious, scoping out our town instead of introducing yourselves."

"Because I can't find anypony in charge!" Twilight huffed. "Whatever then, just point me towards the big welcome party then."

The mare backed away from Twilight. "The, uh, Golden Oak. That-a-way." She reached the street and galloped away, probably to find one of her fellow stalkers for security in numbers.

"This is not how I saw this going." Spike deadpanned. "This has been so awkward."

Twilight shook her head. "I've been booted out of Canterlot into a town of antagonistic recluses. I should have expected this.”

It was then that Twilight heard a soft strand of music and voices carried by the wind. The tune of one of the most popular waltzes in Canerlot right. A party, she was sure of it.

“Spike, can you hear that?” Twilight picked herself up and raced north towards the music. She found herself in the little grass plaza with the massive oak tree. It had to be many hundreds of years old, as it was easily as large as two of the bigger Ponyville cottages. Twilight now realized it was more than just a tree, but a treehouse, a magnificent structure and feat of magical shaping. The cheerful music resonated through the windows cut through the bark.

“Wow. Golden Oak, huh? So charmingly unique, this is where they would board the princess!” Twilight was excited to put an end to the confusion, certain that somepony with the answers was waiting just behind the big red front door.
Overeager, Twilight charged up and kicked said door open without knocking.

“Supriiiiii- OoooF!” Someone's jovial welcome was aborted by a door to the face.

The tree was built somewhat like Twilight's old tower, a big open ground floor that filled the width of the oak with two levels of wall to wall bookshelves, and stairs leading up to private rooms. However, this room was packed with more ponies than had ever been invited into Twilight's former home. It was a party indeed.

“Who is the authority figure here?” Twilight demanded from crowd. “Where is you leader?”

The room was deathly silent, as the assembled ponyvillians (there were probably a hundred ponies in the room) eyed the disheveled new unicorn in their midst. From behind Twilight came an excited gasp.

“That'd be me kinda sorta!” The voice was piercingly high and cheerful, like bubblegum in audible form. But with a pinched nose, because as Twilight turned to look at the pink furred pony, she noticed her undisciplined door breaching had cost the pony a broken snout.

“Oh my goodness I am so sorry. I didn't know you were there and I should have been more careful.” Twilight gasped. She pulled the pony back to her hooves.

“Hey, it's ok, I shoulda been standing a teensy bit farther back. You really took it to that door.” The pink pony grinned, blood streaming down her snout.

“Uh yeah I'm really out of it. Sorry. I didn't sleep much and I had a lot of coffee. Well, not that much, but I usually drink tea with less caffeine, but it was enough to give me a headache, and my point is... well... I'm just really really sorry.” Twilight continued to apologize.
But in the back of her mind, hearing herself babble to the grinning pink pony, she felt a little feeling of indignation. How dare the ponyvillians put her through this- Hiding from her, stalking her, no help with hers bags, because instead they were having a party. Now they gawked at her, ignorant of their own trespasses.

“And I said no problemo.” The pink pony promised.
The kerfuffle resolved, the other ponies resumed their partying. The ponies with their instruments struck up the music and the room became noisy with talk and laughter.

“So THIS is where everypony is.” Spike said, arriving to the scene.

“Yes indeedy! I called everybody here, as is my job as premier party pony. This is a welcoming party for Princ-empress Celestia.” Pink pony agreed.

Twilight blinked. "First off, Princ-empress? Either call her princess, her religious title, or empress, her royal title. Second off, though it fills me with regret to inform you..." She sighed. "Celestia isn't coming. It's me, clearly. I'm your guest, on her behalf.”

The pink pony gasped. “You're Princ-empress Celestia? Oh my gosh your highness I had no idea! I'm sooooo sorry I thought you'd be taller.”

Twilight snorted in frustration, her headache returning. “No, listen, I am Viscountess Twilight Sparkle. Pleasure to meet you. I'm here on Princess Celestia's orders.”

“I gotcha princess." The pink one grinned. "Hey I'm just kidding, I totally understood the first time. My name is Pinkie Pie, and I love to explain my jokes!”

Twilight nodded. She sure looked like a Pinkie Pie. Destiny had a way of giving alliterative names to that kind of pony.

“While I am a bit disappointed the princ-empress isn't coming, you being here will more than make up for it! Come on, and party on her behalf!” Pinkie tried pulling Twilight into the near riotous party crowd, but Twilight resisted.

“Uhm, I'd rather sort out all my arrangements and deal with all my deals, if you know what I mean.” Twilight elucidated. “So... Where can I find the mayor, burgermeiseter, or whomever arranged my accommodations.?”

Pinkie shrugged. “The mayor? He left, like, a year ago. I think he said he was moving north.”

Twilight stared at her. "A what?"

"A year ago."

"Uh huh. A year ago." Twilight nodded vacantly. "And you haven't gotten a replacement?”

“Like me personally? Didn't know that was my job, hee hee!" Pinkie Pie giggled. "Things just run on their own around here. We're like, rural anarchists or something, hah!"

Twilight facehooved. “But this is a Free City! How in heaven's name- You know what, never mind the mayor. Do you have any other city executives? Are there any local nobles I can talk to? Heck I'll chat with the guild master if I have to. Not that it hasn't been wonderful chatting with all you peasants, but I need a pony with authority."

Pinkie Pie shrugged.

"Any village elders? I'd even take the local crime lord." Twilight said in a begging tone.

"Uh... no-sir-ee" Pinkie said apologetically. "I mean like, I'm an authority on baking and other things, and other ponies do other stuff, but that's not who your looking for."

"No, it certainly is not." Twilight agreed. "Just... Is anypony in the know around here?"

“A pony in the know?” Pinkie's eyes sparkled with recognition. “Hey! I have the pony you need, maybe probably!”

She grabbed Twilight's hoof and they shoved their way through the party toward the back of the room. Twilight, feeling more disoriented by the second by the second, allow herself to be pulled along.

“A hoy hoy! Hey Rarity! Hey!” Pinkie hailed a unicorn taking a serving from the punch bowl.

Twilight took stock of the mare's details. Her coat was pearl white, with polished purple mane and tail combed into a glorious curl. Her mark was hidden by a silken white dress somewhat resembling Twilight's own, but for a trio of blue diamonds sewn onto the flank. Here was a pony who could stand against any Canterlot damsel.

“Hello, Pinkie Pie. Here to foist another friend on me?” The mare apparently called Rarity acknowledged the pink one flatly. She had a slight Manehattan accent out of place among the Ponyvillians. “Is it not that the empress should have arrived by now? And- Oh goodness Pinkie, what happened to your nose?”

Twilight stepped forward. “Celestia isn't coming. You get ME instead. Hello."

The white unicorn Rarity flicked her eyes, down, then back up, assessing Twilight. "The capitol sent you?"
Rarity moved in a reserved fashion, but not quite the rehearsed grace of a courtier. Rarity had no coach or tutor for those subtle movements.

"Celestia sent me." Twilight said. "Viscountess Twilight Sparkle, the princess's Élève Premier. That means first student, by the way."

Pinkie Pie turned to Twilight. "Visa-what?"

"That was my reaction." Spike nodded.

Rarity stood unmoving for several seconds, a blank expression on her face. However, once she processed Twilight's words, the mare underwent a sudden change. She began exaggerating her movements while trying to retain the grace.
“Oh my stars! A visountess in Ponyville! And the princess's personal agent? Oh yes of course I know what eleve premier means; we are not so ignorant!" Rarity seemed about to hyperventilate, but calmed down before continuing. Her face formed the perfect visage of congenial acknowledgment. “A great pleasure to meet you Twilight Sparkle. I am ever so sorry Mis Pie failed to give you an appropriate greeting, but I assure you Ponyville is an eminently civilized place.”

"I'm sure, which is why it's Lady Twilight Sparkle if you don't mind." Twilight corrected.

“Yeah, titles are important! It's Lady Sparkle, and I'm sir Spike here to...” Spike turned to Rarity, and his words died in his mouth as he witnessed the pony to whom he was speaking. "...H- Hi!" He gushed.

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Don't jump the gun on your knighthood Spike. You're not even at majority.”

“I'm Spike! Twilight's ward!” Spike eagerly blurted out to Rarity, then immediately cringed. “That is... Sir Spike! Ignore Twilight, err, Lady Twilight. I have connections to the IHG so I can use the title."

Rarity was intrigued. “Oh my. Do all the lords and ladies of Canterlot have a lizard bodyguard?”

"Oh good grief Spike." Twilight pushed him back. "We have to discuss our arrangements, not chit-chat."

Rarity's expression turned blank again. "Your arrangements?" She glanced to Pinkie Pie. "I hope you have not been making promises on my behalf, Pinkie." She asked pointedly

Twilight wondered if she was being given the run-around. "Let's start by establishing where your mayor is."

Rarity pursed her lips. “I heard he died. I have not seen him since last summer.”

“Thats rather morbid.” Spike commented.

“So no mayor since last year." The lack of organization the Ponyvillians was physically painful to Twilight. "So who is in charge? Somepony received the princess's dragonfire letter and informed the rest of you, right? I need a place to sleep!"

"I have a straw mattress in my bakery you can borrow. Pretty comfy!" Pinkie Pie said. "But you said there's a letter? Hey Rarity, when did you hear about the princess coming, Rarity?"

Rarity scowled. "I heard from Fluttershy, who told me she heard it from you."

"Oh yeah." Pinkie laughed. “Well I heard it from Cloud Chaser, who heard it from Daisy, who overheard Applejack telling Pinprick.”

"I am fairly sure Pinprick learned after me." Rarity contradicted.

"Oh yeah?" Pinkie Pie stuck out her tongue.

“Are either of those ponies, Applejack or Pinprick, here?” Twilight asked. That these two strange mare before her, who seemingly had a subtle rivalry or some such, had chosen to be the only villagers to talk to her, was starting to convince Twilight that Celestia had known it would be this miserable in Ponyville.

Rarity cast an eye over the party. “Pin is over by the stair, passed out drunk.”

Pinkie guffawed and Twilight shook her head. “Ok never mind him, where is Applejeck?”

Pinkie Pie was about the answer but Rarity butted in. “Applejack lives out of town. Oh I think it's too late to be endeavoring as far as her farm this late in the day. Your ladyship would hardly want to visit such a dangerous place at this hour.” She said with sudden coldness.

Twilight pointed to one of the windows cut through the tree. “It's mid-day.”

“Surely, you would prefer to discuss things with the town's educated population rather than a bumpkin mare.” Rarity continued, twirling her mane with her hoof.

“Just point me towards her.” Twilight insisted flatly.

Rarity stared for a moment longer. “Generally south. I really to not care to think of that pony, so I am unable to specify further. Good day my lady.” She turned back to the punch bowl.

Twilight was taken aback. Of course she was used to being dismissed, but she thought it wouldn't happen with a noble title. Of course she was insulted, and hurt, but she didn't want to immediately start a feud with a pony she may have to be around for the months until the Summer Sun. "Okay then..."

“Guess I'll tell you then! Applejack's farmstead is just one kilometer west by southwest!” Pinkie cheerfully supplied.

“Thank you. There's really no time to waste so I'll go right away. Come along Sir Spike.” Twilight shoved her way back out of the Golden Oak, dragon in tow.

“Tell AJ I said hi!” Pinkie yelled after them. She turned to Rarity, smiling. “She seems nice.”

"Oh do be quiet. Another meddlesome pony in town." Rarity took a drink of punch, eyeing Pinkie Pie over her cup. "You think you can use her against me. Not before I get her first."

"Hee hee, you have a funny way of making friends then Rarity." Pinkie Pie stuck out her tongue playfully. "Maybe call your ponies off so they don't follow her all the way to Applejack's."

Rarity snorted dismissively, but when she thought Pinkie Pie wasn't looking, she slipped away to do just that.

---

Lyra Heartstrings was already halfway through the grand front entrance of Canterlot Castle, the huge gilded double-door flanked by solid marble, when the knights on guard noticed. "Hey! Hold it there mis!" One of them called out.

Lyra was a unicorn, mint green coat with a lighter mane and tale, streaked with white. Her eyes where a pinkish yellow. As was her custom she wore a black pennycoat.
As ordered, she stopped.

The Imperial Guard knights, clad in their golden armor, stepped forward. "The palace is currently on a restricted entry."

Lyra looked over the knights' swords and spears. It would be awkward if they frisked her and found her own weapons under her pennycoat. "Yes." She agreed. "But I have been summoned."

The knight guards were used to eccentric personalities at the castle, including brooding mysterious types. "Okay. By who. Maybe we have you on the list."

"The Lord Vizier." Lyra said.

The knight checked down the list. "Umm, yes I see Sir Fancy Pants is expecting somepony, but there is no name or description for them. Err, okay, let me check on the procedure." He withdrew back into the castle threshold a few steps. "Sir Armor, how do we confirm if a pony is on the entry list if they don't have a description attached?"

Sir Armor peered out of the guard station adjoining the entry hall. "Haven't you read the handbook? There should be an occupation description in all circumstances."

"Oh, yeah, I didn't see that line. Thank you sir." The first knight scratched his head. He turned back to Lyra. "Okay then Mis, what is your occupation and/or employment."

Lyra paused for a moment, wondering what the Lord Vizier would have put down. "New hire applicant."

"It says 'Seeking employ' but I guess that works." The knight sniffed. "Head on through."

Lyra nodded and passed the threshold into Canterlot Castle's grand entry hall. But she was not clear yet. Sir Armor, standing off to the side, beckoned to her.

"The Lord Vizier is looking to hire you?" Sir Armor asked. The knights at the door turned their heads a bit to eavesdrop.

"We will see." Lyra said.

Sir Armor hummed his dissatisfaction. "Why would Sir Pants be looking for more ponies to manage when there is already so much to occupy him? And why would he decline to give the guard your description?"

Lyra was used to being grilled by law enforcement. However Sir Armor seemed not suspicious of her specifically, but rather the Lord Vizier's intentions. "I could not say, sir. I assure you I would not do any job that went against the IHG, even if ordered to by the vizier."

"Perish the thought of the very possibility of being asked such things by Sir Fancy Pants." Sir Armor shook his head, but he seemed persuaded by her words nonetheless. Maybe there really was tension between the lord Vizier and the guards. "You are cleared so you have no obligation to stop for more questions."

"As you say, sir." Lyra bowed.

Canterlot castle had always made Lyra uncomfortable, from the time she spent in its shadow at Celestia's Unicorn School, to now that she worked odd jobs for Prosser. The castle halls where too tall, the towers too shiny. They stood opposed to the dirty city around them. Lyra always felt as though the castle would rise up and squash her for smudging its purity with her presence. Alicorn grandeur could only be accommodated by mortal purification.

There were not many ponies in the halls. No courtiers, no visitors, just functionaries and guards going about their buisness. Something was up.
The office of the lord vizier was a few floors higher in the main keep, and Lyra arrived a few minutes before her appointment. She habitually retreated into the shadows of a tapestry near the office door, and waited silently. She was restless like most ponies of her occupation, but she felt an illogical fear that pacing around would make the castle angry.

“Enter.” A voice carried out into the hall. Lyra obeyed, entering the office and closing the door behind her.

Fancy Pants sat at a desk, silhouetted by the large window behind him. Bookshelves and armor pieces lined the walls. Most of the decorations were visibly covered in dust, even the books. It seemed Fancy Pants was just interested in the aesthetic.

"Sir." Lyra bowed. She pulled Prosser's letter out of her coat and presented it to the vizier. "Lyra Heatstrings, sir. I have worked for the councilor for approximately one year. I do intelligence and acquisition for him."

“Mademoiselle Heartstrings. Yes, Councilor Prosser's recommendations could not have been stronger.” Fancy Pants waved to the empty seat which Lyra took. He read the letter as he talked. “I will not question your jobs for him. However, he did let slip that you have something of a past to speak of. Was that indiscreet of him?"

"Few ponies do not have a past, sir. If the councilor told the truth, however, that would be uncharacteristic." Lyra gave a small shrug.

"Right. Did you kill any ponies as a guild mare?" Fancy Pants put the letter down.

Lyra remained silent.

"Did you know the Red-Eye Killer during her killing spree across Canterlot?" Fancy Pants continued.

"I was just a child back then, sir." Lyra said.

"So was the killer, or so I have heard. I was just curious." Fancy Pants leaned back in his chair. "Let us see if you are suited for what I need. Do you have a preferred method of infiltrating buildings?"

"Stealth, sir. I am not not very good at social engineering." Lyra said.

"I see." Fancy Pants nodded. "Have you ever been a part of a dangerous heist?"

"Theft is Artisans' Guild work, sir, not Musician's Guild. But I have done some muscle work for heists." Lyra said. "The most dangerous was on account of the cargo, not the security. It was dragonfire, difficult to transport. Huge amounts of private supply of dragonfire has gone missing recently, so there is a battle of theft and counter-theft over the remaining stock."

"Fascinating. We are lucky to have the royal supply under lock, key, and imperial protection." Fancy Pants leaned back in his chair. "So why do imperial work when the criminal work pays better?"

Lyra stayed quiet for a while. "Nopony trusts a former guild mare. There is a stigma. I get accused of betraying the guild mistress."

"Their loss I suppose. I would go longer with the questions, but I can not credibly question Councilor Prosser's recommendation. As much as I hate to admit he knows more than I, he is attuned to the city's seedy side and I am not. Overall I am satisfied with your character." Fancy Pants shrugged. "Let us talk about the work."

"Let's. However I should warn that I made a promise to a young guard officer not to participate in a palace coup." Lyra cracked a smile.

"What? Oh, that was a joke. Ho ho, yes, there are no plans for anything like that at this time." Fancy Pants chuckled. "Rather, my problem is with a private citizen." Fancy Pants sat up and pushed a stack of papers to Lyra's side of the desk. "I need leverage over the Twilight-Bright family, particularly the family matriarch, Twilight Velvet."

Lyra reread the names on the cover paper. "Twilight-Bright. A cadet branch of the Brights of Foal?"

"Close. The connection to the Brights is less important. I want to know more about the Twilight half of the family." Fancy Pants said.

“That sounds like the work of a research assistant, more than a rake.” Lyra mused. "Who are you trying to hide your investigation from?"

"Everypony." Fancy Pants said emphatically. "You will be paid for the trouble so do not get caught up on the 'why'. I want to know everything about the Twilights, their founder, where they came from, all that.”

Lyra didn't think that would be too hard. "If you had asked me last month I wouldn't have had to leave the building. The dynastic chronicles of the Canterlot noble families were stored in Canterlot Castle until recently. As I understand they were moved to the Solar Monastery while a dedicated building is made for them."

"I won't ask how you know that." Fancy Pants grunted. "There are more steps after you get that information. You will need a whole team, perhaps current or former Guild mares."

“Perhaps? Which is it, guildpony or not?” Lyra asked.

Fancy Pants vocalized an indifferent sigh. “I leave that to you. Somepony familiar to you would be best. I do not want to risk agents being bought out by the enemy."

"The enemy? Well, I know a few ponies, sir. Personal friends." Lyra said. "They may take imperial work as long as it is clean."

"No, nothing dirty yet.” Fancy Pants shook his head. "Lastly a word of caution Mis Hearstrings. As I alluded, the presence of counter-agent in Canterlot is likely. If you think there may be a threat, take shelter and alert me immediately."

"Counter-agents from this house Twilight, my Lord?"

"Expect anything. Bon chance." Fancy Pants turned away from her to write something, signaling the end of the conversation.

Lyra rose from her seat and gave a bow, backing out of the room.

It did not seem like it would be a very demanding job. All Lyra would have to do is check the monastery library, and track down her friend at the Musician's Guild.

---

Leaving the Golden Oak and heading south through Ponyville, Twilight felt some of her anxiety go away as she thought things through. At the very worst she could stay at somepony's house until she got her own accommodations. She was not a total stranger to sleeping rough, having spent plenty of nights in library annexes, several camping trips with her family, and one or two awkward floor sleepovers. She could probably do better than a cot in a bakery though.
It was a humiliation to be sure, but not life threatening. But getting the Princess's letter was essential either way.

Twilight and Spike proceeded well past the edge of Ponyville, through an open green pastureland south of the village, but quickly got lost as the path veered into the orchards. It was a whole forest of apple trees that that blanketed the hills for a hundred acres. It was a huge plot of land, and was likely the most valuable farm in Ponyville- It took time and investment to grow so many apple trees.
Twilight assumed the vast orchard provided for all Ponyville's apple need and likely its cider and jams as well. From the chariot she had seen some vegetable gardens and other fields to the North and Northwest of the village, which was where their staple of wheat and hay had to have come from.

However there was one curious thing about the orchard- It was very overgrown. The apple trees' canopies were grown together and tangled up, and the further in they went the less maintained the path was. The farm, for as large and undeniably rich as it was, seemed poorly maintained.

"Fitting place to find a pony called Applejack." Twilight plucked an under-ripe apple with her magic and nibbled on it.

“Maybe we should go back to the town get a guide. We might be lost.” Spike suggested, tiring of walking.

Twilight had to admit she was getting tired of walking as well, which in addition to her sleep deprivation was souring her mood again. She felt sorry that Spike was having to deal with her exaggerated mood swings. "I've had it with backtracking. It may be illogical but I'd rather just get more lost than turn back." She said. "Or we could do something crazy. Let's start chopping down these wretched trees so we can tell where we've already been."

"Just an hour ago you were talking about burning down buildings. Are you okay, Twilight?" Spike asked.

Twilight tisked at him."Worry about the poor state of this farm instead of me. I mean really, is this the ideal layout for plantation arboriculture? These trees are so tight together.”

An unexpected voice from the treeline made Twilight and Spike jump in surprise.
“Thats because we done left this field to its own devices. Trees ain't smart enough not to overpopulate themselves.”

Twilight spun around, trying to identify where the voice was coming from, but the interloper still obscured by multiple tree trunks. “Hey! Do you think it's funny to harass ponies just trying to find their way in unfamiliar territory?"

“Far from me to judge a pony, but I ain't the one trespassing.” An earth pony mare weaved her way into Twilight's line of sight. She was orange furred, with a straw yellow mane crowned with a brown cowpony's hat. Her eye's were green and flanked by freckles. Her mark was a trio of red apples. "You gunna pay for that apple?"

Twilight aggressively bore down on the mare. “Just what are you accusing me of? Is that how you greet visitors?"

The mare looked unfazed. “Nope.”

Twilight glared as intensely as she could sustain for several seconds, but a smirk stole over her face. “Ah ha. Okay, fine. I would like to see how you greet visitors then. You wouldn't happen to be Mis Applejack, would you?”

“Yes'm, thats me.” Applejack returned the smile and gave a shallow curtsy. “And y'all would happen to be Twilight Sparkle, would ya?”

“Lady Twilight Sparkle, in the flesh.” Twilight bowed slightly. She cleared her throat. "So, would I be right to presume that you have Princess Celestia's letter since you know who I am.”

That elicited an embarrassed, perhaps even fearful, look from Applejack. “I'm startin' to realize I came off a little strong, seeing how I have to grovel a bit now, ladyship. I feel like I started lotta trouble, but I can't rightly say. I guess I'm just sorry considering, I didn't know it was official business before I read it. It was just layin' there.”

Twilight was a bit surprised at how quick Applejack shifted to apology. "The letter was laying where?"

“On the ground, outside the town hall. I tried to find the mayor ta give it to him, but seems he disappeared.”

Twilight wasn't surprised at this point. “When was the last time you saw the mayor?”

“Well, last Tuesday he came by my market stall to buy some apples.” Applejack answered.

Spike interrupted. “Was he dead? I have it on good authority that he died.”

Applejack looked confused. “Nope, near as I could tell he was still kickin'. Or trot'n at least.”

Twilight had basically accepted that the mayor was a non-entity, and going forward she should act like he didn't exist. She would have to rely on the other ponyvillians. “Nevermind him. Where is the letter now. I need to see it.” She considered adding 'desperately' to the end of the sentence, but it would not do to seem vulnerable to the country ponies.

Applejack pondered for a while. “Thinking back, I left it in the town hall, incase the mayor came back.”

"Aww man. That's where we started." Spike cried out, getting exasperated.

"I probably looked straight at it as I was searching the back office. "Twilight quickly ran through her list of options. “Very well. Take me there if you please, Mis Applejack."

"Umm, ya can't go yourself?" Applejack asked.

"Last time I refused help with directions I ended up lost in this apple forest for an hour, so no." Twilight said. "So lead the way. I insist."

"...Fair enough. It's what I get for being nosy." Applejack started off through the forest. But with little glances back to the unicorn behind her, it was clear Applejack was not done being nosy. "So, ahem, what do ya need the letter for?"

"It's my proof of authority here in Ponyville, signed by the empress herself.” Twilight said matter-of-factly.

“Ain't that something. But, you sure you don't want to leave it be, and establish your authority here based on your own merits and interpersonal skills?” Applejack asked.

“You're a funny mare, Mis Applejeck.” Twilight said, unamused. “Despite your station and line of work, I think we'll make great acquaintances.”

“You gotta problem with farm labor?” Applejack sounded indignant.

“No, I was joking back. Though to be honest and obvious, strenuous physical labor it's not my cup of tea. I'm more of an academic." Twilight, despite herself, felt herself drawn into the conversation. "Well, I'm actually entirely an academic. I've only been a viscountess for like, eleven hours. I have no idea what I'm facing. Who knows, maybe being a viscountess means a lot of farm labor."

“Hence you needing the letter." Applejack observed.

That obvious point bothered Twilight for some reason. "It's from the princess. I wouldn't want to lose it regardless and neither would you." She cleared her throat. "But uh, let's move it along. I'm starting to get tired to the point of nausea."

"Okey doke." Applejack shrugged. "Anyhow, Mis Lady Twilight, See over there’s the road between Ponyville and my house. You didn't need ta go dashin' around abandoned fields. Right this'a way to town.”

---

And Pon-3 was starting to realize that not only was the Musician's Guild fully aware of her presence in Canterlot, they were actively following her.

She had been heading for the first target of Twilight Velvet's list, the portly noblepony Deeper Frie Fellowship, when she realized she was being watched. She had been walking down an Inner City alley when she saw a pony on the rooftops in a puddle reflection. Then she started noticing them everywhere, as shadows on the walls, echoes from behind her, or more reflections. At least six ponies were following her on street and roof level. They must have had an adequate description of her since they saw through her disguise de-jour: She wore blue-ish dye in her fur and had a workpony's frock on.

"Oh bollacks, they're purposefully sloppy, trying to psych me out." Pon-3 hissed under her breath.
If she had any sense of self-preservation she would run or hide, then get out of Canterlot as soon as she could. But Pon-3 only wondered if they would spoil her hit. Could they be looking for revenge for the slip-ups that had earned her exile?

She pretended she didn't notice them, and continued on to her target on the edge of the Old Town. From her research she was fairly sure that Sir Frie Fellowship was going to be at the same tavern she had seen him at earlier. He would likely have another prospective client in tow, and they would talk buisness over food and drinks.
If the Guild ponies stalking her didn't mess it up, Pon-3 intended to poison Sir Frie Fellowship's food. She had the poisons in her pouch, making her tingle every time she thought of them.

"If those lugs spoil my kill I'll lose my shit. It's been weeks since I had a good one." Pon-3 brooded, feeling anxious, eager, and angry all at once. Even if she got away with offing Frie Fellowship, it was doubtful the Guild ponies would let her continue down Velvet's list.

It was mid-afternoon, and with the days getting longer there was still a fair amount of time before dark. The workers and apprentices were still in the shops and workshops, but professionals and nobles were starting to trickle into the venues.
The tavern that Deeper Frie Fellowship frequented was on the dingy side, but it was not yet crowded. Pon-3 saw the her target through the tavern window, and he was indeed seated across from a bored looking pegasus in fine garb, probably another merchant.

But the Guild ponies were still following her. Pon-3 saw a pair of cloaked ponies peering from a nearby alley. Shapes moved in her peripheral vision, perhaps a pony on the roof.

"Now or never." Pon-3 muttered, ducking into the tavern and nonchalantly taking a seat a few tables away from Deeper Frie Fellowship.

It was a few minutes before the tavern hostess passed her. "Heya there. No credit."

"That's fine." Pon-3 fished out a few bit coins from her cloak. "I'll have what he's having." She pointed to Frie Fellowship.

"Sure." The hostess scooped up the coins and bustled off.

Pon-3 had sketched out a few plans for how to approach the poisoning. In her estimation, the best way to get access to Frie Fellowship's food was through the hostess. She had come ready to impersonate or bribe the hostess to do it.
But there was the complication of the Guild ponies, again! Through the tavern window, she saw those cloaked ponies staring back at her. They watched and waited.

"I am not really interested in your ideological project. I am just looking for the easiest way to get the robe title." The pegasus across from Sir Frie Fellowship was droning on. "My friends in Manehattan told me to get in touch with Sir Jet Set but he pleaded ignorance and told me to get in touch with you."

"Yes, and I told you this is the normal way of doing things." Deeper Frie Fellowship said, his whole body jiggling as he gestured.

"Then why do I have to go back to Sir Jet Set? He told me he couldn't help me." The pegasus protested.

"He couldn't help you directly. Even though the rules about noble titles have been relaxed lately, Speakers of the Estates can't just ennoble any old pony who buys a title. That privilege is reserved to the princess and she hasn't been open for buisness lately." Sir Frie Fellowship said, taking on a tone that suggested this was a scheme he had explained many times before. "But there are loopholes, where commoner ponies who are recommended by a noble court can be considered for ennoblement by the Estates. The Black Horn Council is technically a noble court since we descend from the principality of Canterlot before the unification."

"So... You recommend me to your chum Sir Jet Set, and he sees to it that the Estates give me a noble title." The pegasus repeated.

"These things aren't entirely free, but you already knew that. You came ready to make an investment in the future with this noble title." Sir Frie Fellowship took some bites out of his meal between words. "The noble title can secure a significant tax exemption for your manufactory and export sevices."

The pegasus shrugged. "You don't have to sell me on the deal. I already know the upside. I have been loosing buisness to competitors who can offer merchandise cheeper with their purchased noble tax exemption. They probably bought their title from you too."

"We are all pawns in the game, so don't begrudge me. I may be noble born but I believe it meritocracy! Anypony who can afford noble status deserves to be able to buy it." Sir Frie Fellowship chortled.

"Goodness I hope not. I hope they crack down on this malarky as soon as I receive my title." The pegasus shook his head.

Pon-3 was weighing her options when another pony entered the tavern. It was a white-coated unicorn stallion in a frilly wig and ostentatious noble garb. The new arrival made a show of looking around the room before settling his gaze on Sir Frie Fellowship
"There you are Deeper!" He exclaimed, trotting over to the table.

Sir Frie Fellowship turned in his chair to the unicorn. "Blueblood..." He glanced towards the pegasus. "It's not a good time."

"I'm going to find that pony on the Black Horns docket, right? You're not selling titles on your own, right?" The unicorn called Bloodblood asked in an accusatory tone. "Because the numbers on the books keep falling but you seem as busy as ever with these meeting. Busy enough..." The unicorn sniffled a bit. "To miss supper with me, Deeper."

A mortified look overcame Sir Frie Fellowship. "Oh heavens was that today? Oh I..." He cleared his throat. "Blueblood my boy I'll surely make it up to you. We'll have a bite at the council hall and we can go over the docket and make sure everything is there, including the payments into the council treasury. We will make a day of it."

While the little drama was playing out, the tavern hostess came out with Pon-3's food.
"Whelp, time to do some acting." Pon-3 waited until the hostess went back behind the bar, before picking up her food and trotting over to Sir Frie Fellowship's table. "Excuse me, sir."

"Eh?" Frie Fellowship spun in his chair, looking between Pon-3 and the plate food she was holding. "Is that for me?"

Pon-3 blinked. "Uh, well I think the orders were mixed up and I-" Without waiting for further permission, Frie Fellowship grabbed the plate and began digging in. "Uh, okay then." Pon-3 retreated back to her table.

"Good heavens Deeper you will give yourself a hernia being so aggressive with your food." Blueblood tisked. "Anyway, I have your word about going over the dockets, right? I'll see you tomorrow then." He backed out of the tavern.

The pegasus was non-plussed by it all. "Sir, should we discuss details about my purchase, or have you become too busy?"

"No no, stay a spell." Frie Fellowship insisted.

Pon-3 was hardly foolish enough to stick around to see the effect of the poisoned meal. She rested at her table for only a few moments more, switching her gaze between Sir Frie Fellowship gorging himself and the Guild ponies looming right outside the tavern window.
"Bet they're corralling me to the back door where they've got an ambush waiting. Too bad I made contingency plans dumbasses."

She got up and trotted towards the tavern kitchen.

"You finished already?" The tavern hostess asked from behind the bar. "Uh, hey, wait a sec, where're you going?"

Pon-3 passed through the kitchen into the walk-in larder. "Produce inspection. Nothing to be alarmed about." She was counting on the assorted ponies only paying attention to the fake color in her coat and mane, instead the color of her eyes.

She clambered up the shelves of the larder into a gap in the roofing, and from there into the attic space. She could hear muffled conversations and movement from below her.
She peered out the attic window. The Guild ponies were indeed waiting near the back door. They looked restless, and though it was hard to tell with them covered by cloaks, a bit apprehensive.

"Suckers." Pon-3 snickered. She gingerly opened the attic window and stepped through onto the tavern roof. With the Guild ponies focussed on the ground level, they would be none the wiser! She slunk along to the roof of one of the adjoining townhouse. She crouched behind the roof ridge, spying on the ponies sent to spy on her. The poison in Deeper Frie Fellowship's food would take a few hours to send him into fatal convulsions, with little way for his death to be tracked down to her (or perhaps more crucially, her employer).
"Hell yeah. Feels good to be back in Canterlot." Pon-3 chuckled. "Is see Phyte is picking up real bums nowadays. With Guild ponies like these, I might as well continue down Velvet's list!"

Then, a voice from behind her! "Bums like me, Vinyl?"

"WHAT!" Pon-3 spun around and flattened herself against the roof ridge.

An earth pony mare loomed over her. She had no weapons visible, but up close hooves were enough. The mare's hair and coat where a dark and light shade of grey respectively. Her mark, a treble note, was half concealed under slim saddlebags. Her lavender eyes betrayed fury, her body showed tense readiness.
"Guess what Vinyl. You're coming in to talk to Mistress Phyte."

Pon-3 felt a rush of emotions seeing the earth pony, but none more than embarrassment. "Not even going to take me to lunch first, Octavia?"

---

Lyra Heartstrings did not particularly enjoy visiting the Musician's Guild.

Even among those not aquatinted with the secrets of the institution, it was widely acknowledged that there was something wrong with the Musician's Guild of Canterlot. Firstly, by the name, for it would suggest not a guild for musicians plural, but belonging to one musician in the singular- Guild ponies would aggressively correct those who got it wrong.

The Guild's hall occupied a prominent position in Canterlot's Old Town, but this was not the bustling high street where the nobles and merchants strolled. Tucked away from the lively thoroughfares in a neglected part of the district were a block of abandoned insulae, the project of a court pet to bring working ponies into the Old Town. The whole project collapsed after an associated corruption scandal, and the unfinished housing and land had been sold on the cheap to the Musician's Guild, making some wonder if it had been the plan from the start. Buffered by the empty buildings, the new Guild Hall had a clean marble facade in contrast to the rest of the street. Everything on the outside of the hall suggested an untarnished legacy of artistic integrity.
Both the aspiring and established musicians of Canterlot visited the Guild to practice and perform, hearing each others praises and critiques. Within, musical history had been born, written, played, and died.
But death was much closer to the heart of the Musician’s Guild than most realized.

It was known only to politicians, nobles, merchants, and those who could afford to, that the Musician's Guild was a cult of mercenaries and assassins! The same mares and stallions that played so beautifully in the salons and courts of Canterlot moonlit with songs of death instead, contract killers for the rich and influential.

It was not clear if the Guild had always been a front, or if the poetic ideals of the musicians had been twisted somehow over the ages. From the outside, the guild ponies seemed to answer to a mysterious Mistress, who was spoken of in alternately adoring and cowed tones. Criminal organizations often bred strong leadership, but the Musician's Guild kept its secrets better than most. Indeed it was rare that any hint got out that there was some assassin guild in Canterlot.

Lyra hesitated at the doorstep of the imposing establishment. A few ponies were sitting around the entrance, practicing their instruments or just chatting. They payed Lyra little attention, she was more than a little distrusted by the Guild ponies.

But she was getting payed to be there, so Lyra pushed away all apprehension and passed into the foyer of the guild hall. The building had a relatively simple layout aboveground. A main corridor led past numerous offices, meeting spaces, and practice rooms. The further in she went, the louder it became, with various instruments, voices, and noises playing out all around her. Eerily, every metronome in the hall seemed to be synched up, ticking lethargically, so that the entire Musician's Guild was practicing to the rhythm of a pumping heart. Deep drums resonated from somewhere below, in the more secret parts of the guild hall.
For a moment Lyra almost longed to have her own instrument at her side, to join in the harmony. But those were bad thoughts.

Finally a Guild pony deigned to speak to her. Lyra recognized the pony but didn't remember her name. Some flutist. "Heartstrings. You wouldn't come here if you didn't need something."

"I have an imperial job." Lyra said. "Does Mis Octavia still do contract work?"

The flutist mulled on that. "That would have to go by Phyte you know."

"That's fine." Lyra nodded.

"Octavia, though... It's a bad time." The flutist shrugged. "She is downstairs in the access hall I believe."

"Thank you mis." Lyra bowed, and continued on towards the stairway. She would be seeing how bad of a time it really was for Mis Octavia.

Descending into the first of the many of the guild's sub-basements, Lyra began to hear voices very contrary to the general dark harmony of the practice going on. In fact, it sounded like ponies trying to kill each other.

"Hmm." Lyra did not have to follow the noise long.
Three Guild ponies were fighting to keep a mare restrained. Octavia was among those trying to keep the unicorn mare on the floor tied up.
"I see it truly is a bad time."

The victim, a white-furred mare with patches of dye in her fur, stopped her vicious struggling for a few seconds. "Hey! Hey! Help me! They're gunna kill me!"

"Probably." Lyra agreed.

Octavia kicked the victim in the back. "Shut it or I really will, Vinyl! You put teeth-marks on my saddlebags! All you have to do is behave like a normal pony, and this will go smoother." Octavia faced Lyra. "Oh, Mis Heartstrings."

"I can come back later." Lyra offered. "It's a just job offer again."

"Where's Pinkie?! Pinkie wouldn't let this happen to an old compatriot!" The mare on the floor, apparently called Vinyl, continued to yell, shrugging off the multiple kicks she had received like it was nothing. "Pinkie! HELP! ME!"

"We can meet over tea and discuss it Lyra. I know you would not waste my time with a frivolous job for low pay." Octavia said, stepping over to Lyra. "Unlike somepony."

"You think you're better than me, Octavia?" The Vinyl demanded. "You think you're above the work these other fine stallions and mares do? The work that I did?!"

Octavia growled. "I think I am better, because when I heard an old friend was in town, I sought them out right away, Vinyl."

Vinyl fell silent. "I... was... going to come see you eventually. I just had to do some work to buy an appropriately sized apology gift."

"You are a base thug, Vinyl. If you had any decency and intelligence you would have stayed away forever." Octavia spat.

"I guess so. They gave me respect in Griffany! I did all my own stunts. I have boxes of teeth and beaks to show for it!" Vinyl shouted back. "The Octavia I knew wouldn't need ten other ponies to bring me down. She would have given me the respect of taking me on alone, like the old days."

"The old days were done the day you got caught, Vinyl." Octavia was getting heated again.

Lyra meanwhile was analyzing Vinyl. The abnormal strength, the red eyes, the exile... Could it be? "I was just asked about you."

"Huh?" Vinyl grunted.

"The Red-Eyed Killer. My latest employer asked if I knew you." Lyra said. "I somewhat regret I could not have said yes."

"At least some ponies still put a little respect on my memory." Vinyl beamed. "I had a whole city cowering at my hooves, begging for salvation."

"Which they received, BECAUSE, YOU, GOT, CAUGHT." Octavia hissed. "Guild ponies are not supposed to have a reputation. We are secret, silent, unknown."

"And I've learned that lesson since then. I've hardly worn my own color since I've been in Canterlot. Nopony knows my name or face. I've been using an alias, 'Pon-3'. If I didn't need the bits, I wouldn't even be taking work." Vinyl said.

"That is bold lie." Octavia snorted. "For what deficiencies you have, a lack of lust for murder is not one of them."

"Oh that's so sweet." Vinyl fluttered her lashes.

Lyra was very confused how the situation had gone from violent to almost flirty. "Yes, anyhow." She cleared her throat. "You should seek me when you have the time, Octavia, but I beg you do not take too long. There is a limited window on this job."

"Hey, looking for agents?" Vinyl asked. "I've got one list but I'm in the market for another."

"Incorrigible mare." Octavia shook her head.

"I'll work for half of what Octavia's rate is. And I'll do a better job." Vinyl insisted.

"She isn't serious. She is just trying to get on my nerves." Octavia sighed.

Vinyl winked. "And you love it."

"Keep that up and I actually will take you to lunch first." Octavia shot back.

Lyra had said what she had come to say, so she backed away from the bizarre scene. "Thank you for your brief attention. I think it better that I come back in a day or so. I am not keen on talking shop with a pony on the floor, so you should sort out that situation before you make offers, Mis Vinyl."

"Yeah I'll see to it mis." Vinyl laughed.

"Lyra Heartstrings." Lyra nodded. "Until next time, Mis Octavia, Mis Vinyl." She quickly turned and went back up the stairs and out of the Guild Hall.
It was probably a bad idea to goad Octavia like that by taking Vinyl's offer seriously. Lord Vizier Fancy Pants needed a reliable, cool-headed agent, and Vinyl seemed anything but. Still Lyra was interested in what would become of the couple by the next day.

---

“I, Celestia CLXXIX, Sun Princess, Empress of Equestria, Princess of Canterlot, Princess of the Everfree, Duchess of the Valley, yatta yatta yatta...”
Spike skipped down to the bottom of the letter.
“I declare that Ponyville shall be made to host a Summer Sun Fair, on the eve of the 1000th Summer Sun. I declare that that l'Élève Premier of Equestria, Twilight Sparkle, daughter of house Twilight-Bright, viscountess of Chateau la Garde, Grand Squire of Equestria, shall have oversight of all preparations in my name, and shall act as my will within Ponyville, in all good faith and rights.”

"Sounds like an important pony. Wonder who that could be." Twilight said. She pretty tired was having a difficult time keeping her eyes open.

Applejack let out an impressed whistle. “I reckon you might's well be Lady Celestia herself seein' as how she just invested ya'll with her authority here.”

“Princess Celestia.” Twilight corrected, trying to rub a sleepy haze from her eyes. She grabbed a corner of the letter. “Spike, does it say where we stay?”

Spike gently pushed Twilight off the letter so it would not tear. "No. Though, you'd find it funny that her signature is smudged a little. She must have sent is right after writing it."

Twilight closed her eyes. "Yes I do find that funny Spike."

Appleajack watched the tired unicorn as she struggled to stay awake. Twilight had all but collapsed on the walk from the orchard to the town hall. “Lady, you could stay just about anywhere, I'd say."

Spike nodded. "We were thinking along the same lines."

"Then do y'all need any more help? I have some spare rooms.” Applejack asked.

Twilight shook her head. “I'm good right here. I have no reason to be picky. Thank you Mis Applejack, you have been very helpful." She grew quieter, sinking to the floor and closing her eyes.

Applejack turned to Spike.
“I don't mean no offense, but you seem a tad more lucid than the lady there.” She whispered. “Where can I lend a hoof?”

Spike glanced over at Twilight, who's face was scrunched in extreme frustration one moment, and then relaxed the next. “Um Twilight seemed to think we were taking that big tree home specifically. It had lots of books in it.”

“Oh! The Golden Oak. Well..." Applejack seemed to be contemplating saying something, but just shook her head. "I personally don't jibe with the Oak, but it should be fine for y'all. Yes'sir it'd be a fitting for smart ponies like yourselves. Yep, it'll be just fine.” She grabbed one of Twilight's bags in her mouth, and slung the limp unicorn over her shoulder effortlessly.
Silently impressed by the display of earth pony strength, Spike with his bag followed close behind.

The great oak still resonated with the tones of a wild party. Applejack stood outside for a while.

"Is something wrong?" Spike asked.

Applejack shrugged, jostling Twilight. "I don't know if I should go in.

"Still doesn't answer if something is wrong." Spike went ahead and pushed the red front door open.

"Oh heya there!" The enthusiastic Pinkie Pie was immediately in his face, greeting him before ushering him inside. "Where's your pony? Did'ya find Applejack?"

"Yeah they found Applejack." Applejack pushed the door fully open. A few of the ponies noticed her arrival but the party was mostly continuing on. "Pinkie, what's the point of this shindig if the princess isn't coming and the real guest of honor was wanderin' around lost as a blue hen?"

"Eh? I guess at that point it's just a party for party's sake!" Pinkie giggled. "Oh, and Rarity's here too. She helped me out!"

"Keepin' an eye on each other I imagine? Well as long as ya know where the others are." Applejack sighed. "I'll say it straight: Party's over Pinkie. This here library is hereby commandeered for the little viscountess yonder."

Pinkie Pie glanced out the door, where Twilight was passed out on the luggage.

“Oh you met Twilight then! Isn't she nice?” Pinkie bounced in place. But she paused for a moment, her expression turning serious. "You did warn her about the Golden Oak, right?"

Before the conversation could go any farther, Rarity pushed her way to Applejack carrying a cup of punch. “Ever-so pleasant an evening to you, Applejack. Did you misplace the noblepony we sent to meet you?” The unicorn asked snidely.

“Hello Rarity. No, the noblepony is placed over there. I think it proper though that she get placed in here. If it suites y'all, the ladyship should use this tree as her seat of power for as long as she's in Ponyville." Applejack said.

Rarity took a sip of punch. "Did you come to that decision by yourself?"

"If anypony asks, no. I'm doing it on her behalf. She well enough has the authority to take over the Oak, maybe the whole town." Applejack said, letting a tone of authority slip into her words. "So, properly, I order ya'll to vacate these premises.”

Rarity noted Spike standing by the door, looking uncertain while the ponies talked without him. "You have to be careful Applejack. You can speak for nobility while they are asleep. It will be a different thing entirely when they are awake."

Applejack snorted. "You've been waitin' five years for an awakening that ain't happened."

Rarity's smug grin sharpened, irritation flashing over her expression. "Come all this way to sling insults, then."

"Hey girls, maybe don't argue right now. Shouldn't we start ushering ponies out?" Pinkie Pie asked.

"Count on Pinkie Pie to END a party." Applejack shook her head.

Rarity drank the rest of her punch and tossed away the cup. "Why are you snippy with Pinky? She always takes YOUR side."

"I'll take your side tonight, Rarity, if you agree to help Applejack set up Mis Lady Twilight in here." Pinkie Pie said, pleading for a deescalation.

"After her insulting words, I am duty-bound to ensure Applejack does not intend to wield the viscountess's power vicariously for unworthy aims." Rarity said. "Good gracious, what did you do to her? The poor girl, knocked unconscious, left in the dust, with a usurpacious ruffian now claiming to speak for her."

"Girl? She's your age! Besides 'usurpacious' ain't no word I've ever heard of." Applejack was getting shouty. “Helping is all I'm doin'.”

"And past evidence has shown how harmful that help could be. Indeed any pony who would resort to your help is ill deserving of any all.” Rarity shot back.

Applejack cocked her head a bit, a warning not to push it further. “She didn't ask for it, and I give my help freely. End. Of. Story.”

“Then she is a fool to accept it. I shudder to think of what the princess would say to see her student stoop so low. I liked it better when you were taking advantage of her.” Rarity shrugged. "Now step aside please, I should like to beat the crowd out."

And then she was punched, across the cheek, by the irate Applejack. Rarity was nearly knocked off her hooves, bumping into a few ponies before sinking to the floor.

"Now who's left in the dust." Applejack barked, but as she cradled her hoof there were already signs she regretted what she'd done.

A few ponies screamed. Some ponies immediately ran for the door. Others grabbed a last drink from the dwindling punch bowl before vacating the room.
But what that left was a mess of torn streamers and dropped plates. And Rarity on the floor.

“Ah! Damn you Rarity! Ya done made me loose my temper again.” Applejack kneeled down next to her inert victim. “Come on now, get up! I didn't intend ta hurt ya.”

Somepony escaping the Golden Oak must have bumped into Twilight Sparkle, as she staggered into the library. "Do you ever have that feeling of having dozed for days when it was probably only an hour?"

"It was like, five minutes, and somehow this happened in that time." Spike chirped.

Twilight stared at the inert Rarity for a moment. "Uh huh."

"The annex is upstairs. It has a made bed everything." Pinkie Pie helpfully supplied.

"Lovely. Yeah, this tree is mine now. I've got the letter to prove it, basically." Twilight mumbled. “Good night everypony.” She unsteadily trotted past Applejack and Rarity, and and up the stairs to the Golden Oak's annex and bedroom.

"Oh buck me. Rarity's breathing, but..." Applejack sat back on her haunches. "She just made me so angry tellin' lies about things she don't know nothin about!" She was tearing up a bit. "Why she always gotta tell those damn lies!"

Pinkie Pie chipper smile had turned into a strained neutral grimace. "I'd throw you a cheering-up party, but, you should leave before Rarity's friends get here. Lucky me, cleaning up after the party is just as exciting as setting it up."

"I'm not too cowardly to own my problems, unlike some ponies." Applejack picked up Rarity much like she had Twilight, balancing her on her back. "I've gotta take her to the clinic. They're probably already waitin' on us. Geeze, I shoulda known better than come to town when clout is on the line."

"I'm not sure that was the singular problem Applejack." Pinkie Pie advised. "Hang in there. I'll see ya tomorrow, probably. There's a lot to talk about." She shrugged. "Try hugging some ponies instead of punching them."

"Okay Pinkie, I'll see ya later. Sorry for ruining the party." Applejack left the library with the pony on her back.

That left Spike and Pinkie Pie standing in silence.
"She's going to be okay, right?" Spike was pretty sure what he had witness edwas not normal even for small provincial hamlets.

"Rarity? Yeah she'll be just super if she doesn't have a concussion or something. Yes, Applejack is going to take to the clinic, not the riverside." Pinkie Pie said, snort-laughing at the inappropriate joke. "Dragon-whose-name-I-dont-remember, I'd really like to help with your bags and cleaning up and stuff but I have to go tell my birdcage something. I'll be back in, like, an hour and I'll help you then. If some ponies come looking for Rarity tell them she's at the clinic."
Pinkie bounced out of the library.

"But- Hey! Am I supposed to sit on my claws for a hour? I don't know where the cleaning supplies are!" Spike shouted after her.
He followed her a few paces out the door.
In the evening light, the Ponyville village took on a wholly different aura than it had in the midday malaise. With the party over, everypony was back in their homes. The cottages glowed, wisps of smoke curling from the rows of chimneys. A chorus of insects had begin to play their afternoon melodies. To the north, an orange glow of the sunset twilight silhouetted the mighty Mountain.

Spike looked behind him and up, to the upper window of the Golden Oak. Twilight was watching too. She looked ready to collapse again, but she could not help but pause to admire the tranquility of the land.
She noticed Spike and opened the window. "I think I get it, kinda. Maybe I'm delirious, but I think I get it."

"You're probably delirious. Go to sleep Twilight, or you'll be useless tomorrow too." Spike deadpanned.

"Ouch." Twilight winced. She retreated from the window and latched it closed again.

With no other alternative than sitting on his claws like he'd said, Spike started shoving the luggage into the Golden Oak and familiarizing himself with the basic layout. "Doesn't it always come down to the help to clean up the mess, even in a pretty place like Ponyville." He grumbled.

The Moon began to rise over Ponyville. The Moon began to rise over Canterlot. The Earth and its Dreams drew closer together.
Unholy powers began to stir in the darkened corners of the waking world. That night passed uneventfully for most of mortalkind, but how unfortunate that before she lay her head down on the bed in the annex to sleep, that Twilight glimpsed the moon through the window and received a dreadful feeling of being WATCHED again.

Comments

[Jirodyne]

I may desire to make a certain declaration for the youngest in this audience of readers: Pon-3 and Octavia did not have sex. They went home to cuddle and braid each others hair.

Lies. All Lies.

[Viper5012]

Why is everypony assholes in this story?

[SpiritDutch]

8123789
8486338

It's a big question to answer in the context of the story. There's a lot of assholes with many different reasons that they are assholes, and I think they do a decent job of answering that for themselves. Is there a higher asshole-per-capita here, or are we just seeing the assholes because assholes are willing to do anything to achieve things and thus earn a place in a story? The best non-spoiler answer I could give, is that it's all product of the setting.

But why is anyone an asshole? Some people are just selfish and distasteful people by nature. Some are so invested in a belief or ideology that they downplay the value of kindness to others. Otherization, ostracization, zealotry, or ambition, are all things that may push someone to view someone as an enemy.

[Rosewell8]

Twilight seemed alright for a noble in this story. I never thought she would call people peasants or think she's better, but it may just be the sleep deprivation.