Dashie: Twenty Percent Cooler

by Kieva Lynn

Nine

Standard Disclaimer: I do not own MLP, nor am I in any way affiliated with the author of the story this fic is based upon.

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Chapter Nine

Port Timbrey. As Brian walked Miri back to her car, they talked about all that had happened over the last few months. Miri was still stumbling over herself with apologies, which Brian deflected with good grace. “For the last time Miri,” He said, “I meant what I wrote in the letter I left for you! Of course you didn't believe it was true, no one would have!”

“Well, yeah, but...”

“You were worried about me, that's all. And then I didn't handle things very well either, and you responded the way you should have, again, the way anyone would have, and things just piled on from there.”

“I know you're right. But I still feel terrible.” Miri whispered. She glance to Dash flying overhead. “What about you? I know you've gotta still be a little mad at me.”

“Nah, Dad's right. Who would have believed this? Heck, it's really no different than poor Lyra back home, telling ponies that humans exist. Lemme tell you, I found out after my memories came back that every one of my friends had apologized to her after we got back to Equestria.” A pained expression crossed her face. “Oh shoot. I never got around to it myself.”

“Wait, that's true then!?” Miri exclaimed. “The whole 'Lyra and humans' thing?”

“Oh yeah, and like I said nopony buys it. She's mocked by believers in Bighoof.”

“Bighoof?” Brian asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Well, yeah... Kinda like bigfoot only with hooves. Saddlesquatch.”

Brian and Miri both broke into open laughter.

They were still laughing lightly as the rounded the corner of a shelter building and came into sight of Miri's car. As soon as they saw the car, a pink head popped out the passenger-side window and waved, ecstatically shouting “HI DASHIE'S DAD!!!!”

“You brought Pinkie Pie?”

Dash clapped her forehooves together. “'Brought' is a strong word...”

“What?”

“She jumped out of my freakin' glove box!” Miri shouted.

Brian stared at Miri for several moments, then they both said, together, “Pinkie Pie.”

The Pink pony came bounding over to where they stood. “Hi there I'm Pinkie Pie but you already knew that plus we have met before but just that once and it was a sad day and I'm really sorry for it all but everything's okay now so maybe we should all go back to your place and we could throw a 'Happy Reunion' party or a 'Welcome to Earth' party though I guess it would really be a 'Welcome Back to Earth' party since we've both been here before and-” Rainbow slammed a hoof down over Pinkie's mouth.

“They get the idea Pinks. Besides, any parties should probably wait until Twilight gets the gate up and running.”

“Wait, what gate?” Brian asked.

“Long story short,” Rainbow explained, “The Princess has decided that maybe contact between worlds isn't such a bad idea after all. Twi's helping build this gate thing that'll let ponies and humans come and go.”

“Wow... That's gonna change everything.”

“Eventually. They plan to take it slow though.”

“Probably for the best.” Brian started to say, but before he could speak his cell phone began to ring. “Hello?”

“Brian Dashell.” An unfamiliar voice spoke.

“Who is this?”

“No one you know. But someone you're gonna know real well. That is, if you wants your friends 'ta live through the day.”

“What? Who is this? What's this about!?”

“Here.” The voice said, “I'll let them explain it to you.”

There was a sound of movement on the other end of the line, and then a new voice came on, one Brian recognized. “Brian?”

“Solomon? What's going on here?”

“It's the mob Brian. They've got all three of us here tied up. They think that you have something to do with that big rainbow explosion years ago, think it was a bomb or somethin'. We tried telling them you'd never build a bomb, but, well after you come back to town yesterday and there's another one of those blasts today... Man, what's going on?”

Brian didn't get a chance to answer before the original voice came back on. “Here's the deal: You work for us, your friends live. Come to the corner of Park and Valor in one hour. We'll be waiting.” The line went dead.

“Brian...?” Miri asked.

“Pops, what's wrong?” Dash echoed. Both could see the look of concern on his face.

Brian explained the contents of the conversation to them. “I've got to go.” Brian said. He took off running back towards where he had parked. Miri, Dash, and Pinkie followed.

“Hey, wait up!”

“You can't do this alone!”

“I have to do it alone! These are my friends so I can't ignore it, and I'm not putting you two in danger!” Reaching his car, Brian opened the driver's door to get in.

Miri jumped onto the hood of Brian's car. “Oh no, I'm not letting you go alone!”

“Miri please.”

“No!”

“Dashie, help me out here!”

“Sorry Pops, I'm with her on this one.”

Brian fixed them both with a withering stare. “This. Is. The. Mob.” He said. “We've all had it if we all go in.”

“Yeah!” Pinkie said, popping up out from behind Brian, wearing a fedora and grey flannel suit she had procured from who-knows-where. “They'll be all like, “It's curtains for 'ya Mugsie!” and then they'll fill you full of lead and put you in cement shoes and bury you next to Johnny da Snitch!”

Everyone stared at Pinkie. “'Johnny da Snitch?'” three voices asked at once.

Pinkie frowned. “It sounded like a mob name.”

Miri asked “Look, Brian, you've got an hour to be there. How long a drive is it from here?”

“Ten minutes tops.”

“Then we've got forty minutes to come up with a plan.” Dash said. “Heads together...”

XXXXXXX

Fifty minutes later, Brian drove along the streets towards the location he had been given. Miri rode beside him, to his discomfort. “It'll be okay Bri.” She said. “Just stick to the story. I'm you bomb making assistant, you need me to get the most out of the design.”

“I still can't believe I'm driving you into this.”

“Chill. Dash and Pinkie will do their parts and we'll all be out of this soon enough.”

The plan was straightforward: Brian, with Miri posing as his assistant, would go to the Mob and pretend to agree to build the 'rainbow bombs' in exchange for insisting on seeing that his friends were safe with their own eyes. Once the hostages were freed, they would act like they were going to work, stalling for time. Meanwhile, Dash, following them from the air, would sneak into whatever building they were in through the roof. Pinkie, able to go between worlds on her own, would return to Equestria and let Twilight know that the gate needed to be turned on, like, right now. Dash would get to Brian and Miri, and activate the recall necklace Twilight had given her, whisking the three of them back to safety in Canterlot. From there, they would return to Earth and usher Brian's friends away to safety before they could be targeted in retribution.

“I hope so.” Brian said. “There's so many ways this could go wrong. Not the least of them being it's reliance on Pinkie.”

“Just keep praying and hoping.” Miri said. “It'll all work out.”

“I hope so.” Brian repeated. “Because here we are.” He pulled into a parking space and switched off the engine. They both got out, and saw a group of men approaching.

“Five minutes early.” The leader said. “I like punctuality. But who's the dame?”

“My assistant.”

“And I'm supposed t' believe that? She's too young to have been more than a kid when the first bomb went off years back.”

“Which is why I need her.” Brian bluffed. “She knows a few details I don't. Details that can make the boom bigger. You want the bombs? Then you don't just want me, you want us both.”

The enforcer seemed to think that over for a moment. “Alright, fair enough. C'mon you two, let's get moving.”

Both Brian and Miri were grabbed by the mobsters and blindfolded, then led to a waiting van. They were shoved inside and driven away. High above, Rainbow Dash followed as the van drove in a series of complex loops through the city streets. “Throwing off tails?” She wondered, “Or just making it so that they won't know how far they were actually taken?” Her musings tended towards the latter when the van ended up stopping at a warehouse less than two blocks from where the trip started.

As Rainbow watched, her father and Miri were ushered out of the van and into the warehouse. She flew down and peered in through a skylight. Inside, she could see three people, two men and a woman, already tied up in chairs with mob enforcers guarding them. There were two more chairs, and Brian and Miri were forced into them and also tied up. A new man, richly dressed and exuding an air of self-importance stepped into view. Clearly the boss of this little gang. “Mystery villain enter and sign-in please.” Dash thought to herself...

Brian and Miri looked around as the blindfolds were removed. Seeing his friends, Brian immediately began asking if they were okay.

“Other then the lumps on the back of our heads, we're doin' fine.” Solomon answered. “But I'd sure like to know what all this is about. How'd you get mixed up in all this Brian?”

“Yeah! Tell them you don't even know what this 'bomb' business is about!”

A sound of someone clearing his throat caught everyone's attention. Out of the shadows stepped a tall man in a thousand dollar suit. “You'd better hope he does know lady.” The man said. “You'll forgive me for not shaking hands, but, well, you are tied up... Don Calamari at your service.”

“The boss of the whole city!?”

“The same. And if you don't do what I want, well, it's cement shoes for all of you.” The Don pointed at a set of precast concrete blocks with shoes set in them.

Miri stared at the blocks, then with a raised eyebrow asked, incredulously, “Your cement shoes are pre-made?”

“Of course. It saves time. Though... I do admit it lacks the personal touch of years past.”

“Wow...”

“What!? Youse want I should be inefficient just because I'm evil?” The Don shook his head. “Back on topic.” He stared at Brian. “You gonna work for us or no?”

Brian stared right back into the Don's eyes and, to the shock of his three friends, answered “Let my friends go and I'll give you all the bombs you want.”

“Good. But, I want the first bomb before we release them. Gotta make sure you hold up your end.”

Watching and listening from above, Rainbow tensed up. This was bad. The plan had been for Brian's friends to be released, so that only he and Miri who already knew about Equestria would be present for the rescue. Now, with three others present, things would get complicated. “Now what...?” She asked herself...