Princess Celestia employs her personal top scientists and engineers to create an apparatus that could teleport whatever she wanted, or whatever existed in the known universe, to her. What follows could be the best discovery in the history of Equestria, since sliced cheese.
Decided to step out of the norm and my comfort zone, and focus my mind on other things. This is my first shot at random comedy, so it might not be the best thing that you've ever seen. However, I do hope that you enjoy this delectable oneshot of mouth-watering proportions!
Celestia vector by red-pear
Chapters (1)
Mmmmmm...
the magic of friendship meets the magic of burritos.
Still not as good as Moes
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Hear, hear!
4190274
Happy to see that you enjoyed it
4190385
If that's a reference to the restaurant in the Simpsons, I'd have to agree... to an extent
Chipotle is delicious.... That last part with Luna cracked me up.;)
I would give you a mustache for a job well done I am on my Idevice, but you deserve one, just so you know.;)
My Little Pony: Burritos Are Magic.
x25
Dude, the lolz are too much.
Overall, a nice little story. I loved that you described the action on the human end; too often stories like this don't. It would have been interesting to have one more section, where the hapless Chipotle employees are explaining to the manager why there's a hole in the ceiling.
Now for a little nitpicking:
First, pay attention to tense. In the beginning paragraphs, especially, you often switch between past and present.
This story (like most) is past tense, so line should have been lined.
Some problems with descriptions:
I get that you're describing them as a matched pair; the way you phrased this makes it seem as if somepony had taken the jewel out of her tiara and put it in her 'gold yoke thingy'. [I've heard it called yoke, torc, petryal, necklace, etc.; pick a term you like and go with it
]
Also:
carpet =/= linoleum.
Luna's speech--I always enjoy seeing archaic English being used for her speech. I would recommend finding someone who understands it well to make sure that you are using the correct words, though.
It should read (IIRC) "Sister . . . we bring thee good news from thy royal engineers. They hath finished their work on thine invention ..."
"Will do! ... MAKE HASTE, OUR ROYAL SUBJECTS! YOU SHALL NOT KEEP THY PRINCESSES..."
(I'm pretty sure that's correct, but not 100%. I'm blessed in having a medieval scholar and a linguist among my pre-readers, who generally correct my mistakes in Ye Olde English.)
I have found this table useful:
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Thanks for spotting the inconsistencies; I've promptly made the necessary changes. Let me know if you find anything else that I, possibly, may have missed
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Hah! Priceless...
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I'll give myself one, in your honor
Love Chipotle, but I only ever get the steak tacos with lettuce and cheese.
One of my fav shows crossovered with one of my fav restraunts...
nuff said!
Well, since they don't normally wear clothes I guess underwear blood isn't a big concern