A Freshly Cut Diamond
Written by Matthais Unidostres
It was beautiful Friday morning in Ponyville. Diamond Tiara woke up as usual, and she cheerfully brushed her mane and put her on her precious namesake. She ate her extravagant breakfast, honeyed oats with fresh cream and berries with a side of perfectly golden brown french toast. She bid her father a good day and pranced out in the sunny day outside.
As she walked through Ponyville on her way to school, the little rich filly broke out into a song:
Not long ago, when my flank was bare
I started doing things with a new flare
Like shooting insults at the nerds and wimps
I'd set up verbal tricks, just like an imp
And exploit weaknesses, get in ponies' heads
And I looked into the mirror and said. . .
"What did you say?" Silver Spoon chimed in as she ran over to Diamond Tiara's side.
I said "DT, you've gotta be,
As ruthless and,
as commanding as you can possibly be!
Cause you're malicious!"
"You're so malicious," Silver Spoon chuckled.
"You have a talent for causing things pain!"
"Pain!" Silver Spoon sang as Diamond Tiara suddenly bucked Dinky Doo in the side as she walked by, knocking her into the fountain with a splash.
"D, you're malicious!"
"D, you're malicious!" Silver echoed.
"Yes, your fate is to verbally maim!"
"Verbally maim!" Silver chimed in as Diamond pulled the game cartridge out of Button Mash's Joy Boy as she walked by him, causing him to scream in horror as his game shut off right in the middle of a boss fight.
"Just imagine if you reached Princesshood!
But perhaps being Mayor would suffice,
D, you're malicious!
You're such a success!"
Diamond Tiara sighed contentedly, as she kept her elated smile as she trotted through Ponyville with her lackey Silver Spoon next to her. Silver took over the song as the pair approached a cafe where Twist was about to enjoy a morning fruit smoothie.
Here she is folks, the brilliant mastermind!
Diamond reached over and grabbed Twist's smoothie, taking a long drink through it's straw, much to Twist's dismay.
Watch her suck up that smoothie, oh my gosh!
Sure she's a bully, but she's just so bad she's good!
But who would punish adorable Diamond Tiara Rich?
Diamond gave an adorable innocent smile.
"Hey, that'th not nithe! I payed for that!" Twist called after Diamond Tiara with a frown.
Diamond turned around a blew a raspberry at Twist, "Ehh, shut up, you piece of trash, your voice is dumb." Diamond then smiled widely, feeling proud with herself, and pranced off as she launched further into her song.
I am malicious!
"Thhe'th malithiouth. . ." Twist said sadly as she hung her head low in, now fully depressed.
And I enjoy the role that I have picked!
"Love it!" Silver chuckled.
I'm malicious!
"That's what you're best at!" Silver Spoon sang as the pair of fillies bumped their Cutie Marked rumps.
And I get off on the pain I inflict!
"Really love it" Silver chimed in as Diamond kicked a rock at the muffin Derpy was holding in her hooves, knocking it to the dirty ground. Tears began to pool under the grey pegasus' eyes.
I thrill when I insult a Blank Flank!
"Blank Flanks!"
It's swell though they tell me that I'm malicious!
"Malicious!" Silver sang as she and Diamond jumped onto the swings and swung on them standing on their hind legs, holding their fore legs wide as they posed.
And though it may cause my daddy distress
"Distress!"
Diamond Tiara jumped off the swing and looked over to see the Cutie Mark Crusaders talking with each other near the entrance to the school. She grinned wickedly as she focused her eyes on Scootaloo's blank flank.
As long, as there, are Blank Flanks and cripples!
I know, I know that their pain will amuse me!
Diamond Tiara reached into her school saddlebag and pulled out a pointy, sharp sewing needle "Oh, amuse me. . ." she said in a tone of pure relish of what she was about to do, staring at the needle with an evil smile and a look that resembled adoration. She then pranced a few feet closer to the unsuspecting pegasus.
'Cause I'm malicious!
And a success!
The pink filly then threw the sewing needle straight at Scootaloo's blank flank. "Say 'oww'. . ." she whispered.
"OWW!" Scootaloo screamed as she jumped a few feet into the air out of pain.
"Say 'oww'. . ." Diamond Tiara softly squealed with delight.
"OWWW!" Scootaloo shouted as she landed back on the ground, right on the needle, pushing it in further.
"Say 'OWW!'" Diamond Tiara said slightly louder with an elated grin on her face.
"OWWWWW!" Scootaloo exclaimed as Applebloom pulled the sewing needle out of her flesh.
"ROYAL GUARD! FREEZE!"
Everypony's heads snapped around to the direction of the loud, gruff voice. There were two tough looking Royal Guards standing there, with Spike and Twilight standing between them.
"Diamond Tiara. Get over here," Twilight said sternly.
"Huh?" the filly replied.
"YES! She did it! She stabbed me! Arrest her! Banish her and throw her in a dungeon in the place she's banished too!" Scootaloo cried out angrily.
"I didn't do anything to you!" Diamond Tiara argued, "The Princess probably wants to give me an award!"
"For what, being a spoiled brat," Applebloom mumbled.
"I heard that!" Silver Spoon called out.
"Enough!" Twilight shouted in frustration, then she looked at Diamond Tiara and said, "I'm not here to punish you, but I'm not here to give you anything either. Now, if you'll just give me you tiara, we can get this over with as quickly as-."
"WHAT!?" Diamond shouted, "You want my tiara!" She gripped her namesake protectively. "NEVER! When I tell my Daddy that you tried to-."
"I have very good reasons this, reasons I'm sure your father will agree with wholeheartedly once I explain it all to him," Twilight said sternly. She then held her hoof out and said, "Now, hand it over."
"NO!" Diamond shouted, and she turned to run. However, she was quickly blocked off by the two Royal Guards, Spike, and even the Cutie Mark Crusaders. She growled and turned to Twilight, "HA! You're think you're so great! You're not even a real Princess! You're just a dumb egg headed bookworm with a horn and wings! I can't believe I wanted to get close to a freak like you! You'll never measure up to Celestia!"
Just then, a bright light flashed in the sky, and Princess Celestia descended from the sky.
Diamond's pupils shrank as she cowered in fear.
Celestia looked down at Diamond Tiara, and focused her gaze on her headpiece.
"Twilight," she said, "Do you have the book?"
Twilight took the book out of her saddlebag and magically handed it off to Celestia. Celestia opened the book up to the page Twilight had book marked, and compared the image in the book to tiara worn by the filly before her.She then used her golden magic to take the tiara off of Diamond's head. She scrutinized it, and touched her horn to it. After a tense few minutes, Celestia nodded gravely and gave the book back to Twilight.
"Let us end this, Twilight," she said.
Twilight nodded as she but the book back into her saddlebag. Celestia then used her magic to levitate the tiara in between them, a distance above the ground.
"Ready?" Celestia said.
"Absolutely," Twilight said.
Celestia and Twilight focused on the tiara.
"Now!" Celestia said, and both Alicorns unleashed their strongest magical energy beam at the tiara. The gold and purple magical energy fused into one bright white light. The onlookers looked on in disbelief, their eyes wide as red energy seeped out of the tiara as it was assaulted by the Alicorn's magic. And then, without warning, the tiara shattered, crumbling into silver dust which was scattered by the wind.
All of the fillies looked on with dropped jaws and wide eyes, with the exception of Scootaloo, who looked as if she was just moment away from bursting into a cheer. However, Diamond Tiara was the first one to break the silence as she ground her teeth and her face grew red. Unable to contain it any longer, she burst out screaming at the top of her lungs.
"YOU MONSTERS! YOU FAT UGLY FREAKS! JUST WAIT UNTIL MY DADDY FINDS OUT ABOUT THIS! HE'S GONNA SUE YOUR ROYAL FLANKS! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! ARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHH!"
Diamond Tiara let out an enraged shriek as red magic surrounded her. The red magic began to slowly dissipate, flowing out of her and into the air, evaporating into nothingness. In a few seconds, the red glow was gone, and Diamond Tiara fell down unconscious.
"Diamond!" Silver Spoon exclaimed fearfully, running towards her fallen friend's side. The Cutie Mark Crusaders could only look in in shock and slight fear.
Twilight teleported to the unconscious filly's side and looked her over a bit. "It's okay. I guess breaking the curse shocked her system, but I'm certain that when she awakens, she'll be good as new. . .actually, make that better than she was."
"Go away!" Silver Spoon shouted, tears gushing forth as she pushed Twilight away, "You did this to her! It's your fault! Your fault. . ." Silver Spoon broke down crying.
Twilight sighed, and she turned to Celestia. "We should probably take everypony with us to Filthy Rich's home. Then we can explain things to everyone at once."
"Of course," Celestia said with a nod. She brought forth a stretcher and placed the unconscious filly onto it. The Royal Guards ran over and lifted it. "Come, my little ponies," Celestia said to the other four fillies, "All will become clear very soon."
This is pretty interesting so far... but please do not do any more song parodies, it's kinda jarring to have it go from dark humor to drama like that... but it IS a redemption story, so I'll fave it and maybe put it on my group?
Oh lordy..please continue.
4185114
Oh don't worry. This is meant to be like an actual episode, and they usual only have one song in them. I suppose the actual show would use the words "malicious" instead of "sociopath," but you get the idea. Only one song in this.
Of course DT is inhumane, she's a pony not human. Hint hint?
So far I am entertained.
Though as someone who kind of likes Silver Spoon, I'm not too thrilled with the prospect of her being the only intentionally and curse-free malicious pony around
4186171 Silver Spoon was never truly bad. She was just copying Diamond Tiara because no one else would be her friend. Besides, it was always Diamond Tiara who thought of cruel things to do.
4185600 Honestly, I think "malicious" in place of "sociopath" would flow better.
4186145 You should be ashamed of yourself. Go to the time-out corner.
I like it so far. Can't wait for more. I may want to
blatantly steallovingly adopt something similar in one of my stories.Intrigued...
Do go on...
4185600 Are you a Redwall fan?
4185600
"'Cause I'm malicious" would work better because you'd end up with a line that not only has the same number of syllables as the original, but has the stressed syllable in the same position, so it would fit the music more closely. "'Cause I'm a sociopath" not only requires you to cram an extra syllable into each line, but in some cases it causes the stress to fall on the wrong beat, so it disrupts the flow.
Hahaha! Woonadafa!
4187067
The answer to that is obvious.
4187658 Okay, you're right. I'll change it now.
4187476 I put the reference in the description.
4186813 Okay. I'll fix it.
4188168 OH. OH, I have a story Idea for you
Sela and Chickenhound in Equestria, I loved Sela in the book.
4186813 What is THAT supposed to mean?
4189028 That joke was corny... granted, I like corny jokes and laughed, but you must be punished regardless.
You had me at Little Shop of Horrors song parody! I will favorite and read this later!
Well, I'm interested.
Wow, I have to say I really like this so far! The plot is interesting and the song parody was awesome! Keep going!
Rather good so far, just one question.
...How come Silver Spoon isn't in the character tags? Sure, she's an utter toady, but she's DT's utter toady. Just seems rather strange to have a DT focused fic without Silver Spoon in it as more than a bit player.
you had me the second you said Little shop of horrors, I haven't read the story yet, but it's on my list.
I like this. Keep it coming.
This is aninteresting story.. so faving!
Interesting, but way too fast.
I LOVE THIS!
I especially love the song! I was just listening to it a few days ago then I stumble upon this, BRILLANT!
Looks promising.
Props for using my favorite song.
As a matter of personal preference, I generally don't like Diamond reformation fics that strip her of the need for accountability. The premise tends to do that. Of course, maybe the story deals with issue of how much she should, especially if CMC and company only ever knew Diamond as she is. They'd be torn, I think.
I'm really not in love with the format either. I realize than for some of its plot points the show can be rather simple...and they would do what you did. As a reader, though, I'd prefer more set up and depth. I feel it moves too fast from point A to point B.
I'm on the fence at the moment, I can think of an interesting story with the idea, depending how long she has worn that. If it's for most of her life then there is a legitimate question of who is she really? Of course, if it's been that long, then what does that make Silver Spoon since she would have no such excuse?
So, I guess it's wait and see.
Looks like you're succeeding in your quest of a fanfiction episode for MLP:FiM.
More Please. This is very good.
You know what would have been a better song template?
Big Gay Al's I'm Super Song
South Park: Bigger Longer And Uncut
Diamond Tiara redemption story?
dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/40553515/normalreactions/gonnabegud.gif
4186145 oh that is just SAD
DT's tiara is a magic artifact that turns it's wearer into a evil, malicious individual, I can go with that
now to read what's here
Great concept, and I'm going to watch the story, but holy fuck this is so rushed. Slow down! Just because it's written like an episode doesn't mean you have to have everything take place at 500 miles per hour to fit it in.
Good, good...
...You have my attention.
You know, I was actually hoping the tiara would get broken completely by accident, and then this big demon comes out and is like: "Curses! My power over this foal is undone! According to the Demon Code, I must now return to the spirit realm!"
And everypony would be like: "...The hay just happened?"
That would have been hilarious.
4198666
It's really more likely she's worn that particular tiara since around the time she got her cutie mark, as it's literally the symbol of her talent. That would mean she's only been possessed since ca Call of the Cutie in season one.
Honestly, at best I see Silver Spoon as a huge sycophant who just goes along with whatever Diamond does.
Twilight suggesting for kids to miss school? BLASPHEMY!
4203817 You're a genius.
4204563
Yeah, I get that a lot.
Mind, Nathaniel does make a good point regarding her personality. If she's only been evil for a relatively short period, I'd still expect her to be kinda spoiled even without the tiara. Just, you know, actually capable of empathy.
4204557 ITS TWILING!
Interesting. I will follow this story. Please continue.
Very nicely done, I am intrigued and wish to see more.
Not bad :D
Want to see what will happen next ;)
It's an interesting idea and, yes, could definitely make an episode of the show.
A little too violent and dark for the show, but close enough. Pretty good.