Chapter 7
Twilight and Vinyl were running through the streets of Canterlot. They had run into one of the pegasus guards and informed him of the situation with Discord. Twilight concluded that since he was able to fly, he could reach the Princess a lot faster than either herself or Vinyl could, so he was the best choice to carry the message to the Princess. He immediately took off and Twilight and Vinyl turned back to keep an eye on the statue. Twilight grumbled to herself (not for the first time) and cursed the many spells that protected the castle... especially the anti-teleportation enchantment that Starswirl the Bearded cast after an attempted assassination on Princess Celestia. Even if it made perfect sense, it was still very inconvenient when situations like this occurred and Twilight was unable to teleport directly to the Princess and inform her herself.
Which brings them to where they are now... Twilight and Vinyl running as quickly as they could back to the gardens... It will take time for Princess Celestia to gather the Elements of Harmony and their bearers, so somepony has to make sure Discord stayed locked away until then. Unfortunately, there was nopony who is strong enough to solidify the containment spells, so Twilight was hoping that she was strong enough to at least slow down their degradation. If he did break free, she prayed that he would focus all his attention on her until the Princess was ready. Shes the logical target of his anger since she was the one who managed to gather all the Elements and stop his previous attempt at taking over Equestria... But she was scared at whatever chaotic games the Draconequus has planned for her... Needless to say, Twilight hoped that he was still locked away in his prison...
Those hopes were dashed when they heard the first scream rise down the street. Both mares looked at each other and grimaced while quickened their pace. Soon they began passing ponies who were running in the opposite direction, all of them yelling about a monster attacking the city. Twilight charged her magic and prepared a stun spell... if Discord is free, then she will only have one shot to stun him before he would notice her and start his chaotic games.
The streets quickly became empty. Closed windows and locked doors lined the streets, and she watched as a rainbow maned pegasus with pink substance covering one of here wings. She was being chased by a large creature... who was not Discord. Twilight stopped running and surveyed the scene.
One of her best friends was being chased by a large bipedal creature. Said creature estimated to be close to seven feet tall with a slim build. Muscular strength was apparently its main weapon due to not having a horn of any kind, nor any wings. It was very muscular, though how much strength the creature had was unknown and too dangerous to test at the moment. Physical features include a dark gray mane with a dark black strip running through it similar to her pink and purple. No apparent coat was noticeable, so peach/white skin was visible throughout most of it's body except for a few small patches of fur. Creature had four limbs, with five digits at the end of each. The top two limbs had digits similar to those of a dragon, except they had no scales and had five digits instead of four. The bottom limbs has small digits, their purpose unknown. There were tiny claws at the end of each digit, the strength of the claws also an unknown.
As Applejack would say in this situation, "Hand me mah rope, we need ta stop this critter."
Sadly, Twilight didn't have any rope on her, so her magic would have to do. A blinding flash erupted from her horn followed by a beam of pink light. The beam flew across the street and hit the creature... but the creature kept moving as if nothing happened. She fired her stun spell with similar results. Growing irritated, Twilight summoned more magic and attempted to pick up the creature... except once she closed her grip on it, her magic slipped off him. It felt as if she was trying to grab a greasy ball with her hooves.
Twilight stood in shock when she realized that her magic was useless against this creature. Questions roared in her head trying to think of an explanation to this impossibility. Magic was the constant in the world, everything was affected by magic! Pegasus flew because of it, Earth Ponies grew food because of it, Griffons had unnatural strength because of it. Everything had magic, even Discord had magic, and Unicorns learned how to harness and control this universal force... except for this creature.
Twilight's eyes narrowed as she focused on the impossibility. This creature was obviously part of some game Discord stewed up. What better way to hold off the Elements of Harmony than with something that cannot be affected by their magic.
"Get away from me you monster!" Rainbow Dash cried out as she jumped over a few tables by an abandoned cafe.
"Run run as fast as you can, you can't avoid me, I'm the former statue man!" the monster shouted back at the frightened Pegasus as he flipped every table and threw every chair that got in his way. It reached out and grabbed Rainbow Dash's tail, only to be bucked in the chest. It flew back and crashed into one of the piles of tables it overturned. A loud laugh escaped from it and jumped back up to resume the chase.
He might not be affected by magic, but physical attacks seemed to do affect it, if only slightly... A plan formed in Twilight's head. She turned to Vinyl.
"Vinyl, I need you to go get the Guards to come this way. We need to subdue this creature before he can harm anypony, but we need the guards numbers and strength to hold it down." She said.
Vinyl gave Twilight a glance and nodded. She turned and ran back up the street to find another guard. Twilight turned to the creature and her friend and gulped...
"Rainbow! I need you to lead it over here!" She shouted to her friend.
Both Rainbow Dash and the creature looked up and noticed Twilight. Rainbow Dash gave a brief nod and turned to run toward her friend... but the creature stopped running only to stare at the purple unicorn. It's mouth was moving as if it was talking to somepony, but he did not move from his spot.
When Rainbow Dash made it to her friend, she paused to catch her breath and glanced behind her to see the creature was no longer chasing her.
"What is that thing?" she gasped.
"I don't know Rainbow... where did you find it?" Twilight inquired. The creature was pacing back and forth but still hadn't moved any closer to them.
"He popped out of Discord's Statue when it cracked open..." Rainbow said.
"What?!" Twilight shouted loud enough to cause both Rainbow Dash and the creature to flinch. "Are you telling me Discord has already broken free?"
"I don't know! His statue broke and this creature came out of it. I didn't get a good look to see if Discord was anywhere because the creature has been trying to grab me." Rainbow shivered. "I don't know what it wants, but it has been yelling about wanting my warmth..."
They both looked at the creature who quit pacing and began a slow walk toward them. Rainbow quickly ran behind her unicorn friend and crouched down. She started to pry the sticky substance off her wing. Twilight held her ground as it got closer. More Detail became apparent the closer it got, the first was the creature was a male. It had a thin gray beard and had a very thin and sparse coat of dark hair. Not enough to cover the skin, but it was there. But what stood out most was it's eyes... they were a golden color that seemed to almost glow. There was something familiar about those eyes.
It... He paused right in front of Twilight and took in a deep breath.
"Twilight," He said in a deep, gravely baritone voice. "You know why I am here."
It clicked. His eyes were the same as Discords. The gray mane was the same color as the upper coat on the Draconequus, and the black stripe was the same as his cropped mane. The claws on his digits were similar to the claws that were on both his lion paw and eagle claw. But... he was symmetrical... both his arms and legs were the same. He no longer had his horns, wings or tail, but the long thin body was similar to his old body, except both sides matched each other. She realized that she was looking up at Discord... only he was no longer chaotic. He was... harmonious...
The Elements of Harmony cured Discord of his chaos.
"Yes... I think I do..." she murmured.
A smile broke out on the former Draconequus' face. "Then this will be easy for both of us then." he said bending down. He brought his face close to Twilight's and gazed into her eyes. "I am sorry, but this isn't working out between us." he announced.
Twilight blinked in surprise... "What?"
"I am sorry... It isn't me, it's you... please don't take this too hard." The former Draconequus continued. "And to show I have no hard feelings, I won't take our daughter away from you." He stood back up. "Take care Twilight."
With that he turned and began to skip away shouting Freedom and occasionally breaking into small dances. Twilight stared at him until he turned a corner. Her mind was a flurry of activity attempting to make sense of what Discord just said...
"Twi?" Rainbow Dash hovered just in front of her friend, the pink mess cleaned out. "What just happened?"
Twilight glanced up at the pegasus. "I think I just got dumped..."
_________________________________
Author's Notes:
Yeah yeah, shorter chapter than I have been trying to do (attempting to 2000 words at least), but I just couldn't continue the story after this scene... I mean come on! It is the perfect cliff-hanger!!!
I will try and have the next update done by next week. Until then, beware of crazy statue men who want your warmth!
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Very last sentence was HILARIOUS except that one word was missing :) I like this story keep it up.
638088 Fixed! The meaning of that sentence was dramatically different without that one word...
If you had "make me laugh" as a personal objective, you've just achieved it. Solid gold, this story is.
Awesome absolutely awesome
I can't wait to hear what happens next
Now go my good sir and infect the world with you're crazy insanity
This story just keeps getting better and better with every installment, go man go!
Yeah, now this guy is interesting.
This could turn out to be one heck of a story.
Ahhhh.... y u no give statue man your warmth rainbow dash?
638140 638157 638255 Glad to see y'all enjoying to story! Hopefully the insanity and fun continue to please the audience!
638403
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638758 That was added in at the last minute. I overheard some children talking about Shriek at work and they joked about how funny the Gingerbread man was. That line popped into my head and I just couldn't leave it out.
Listening to Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch makes this even more fun
Rainbow Dash kicks and does no damage
Does that mean ponies are plushies compared to him?
This story is so delightfully random
. Keep up the good work.
this is Hilarius I WHANT MOAR!!!!
"Run run as fast as you can, you can't avoid me, I'm the former statue man!" Best line ever... of all time.
You need to go through this chapter and pick a tense
744993 Gone threw and fixed! Oh the dark chapters that were posted without an editor... *shiver*
Thanks for letting me know that it was this bad!
Rainbow Dash, WHY YOU NO SHARE YOUR WARMTH?!?!?
Giant and magic proof! You just keep making things better!
And AWESOME last line.
I wonder how long before they realize it isn't Discord though.
Lol duhfuq?
Congratulations! You have Baffled Twilight Sparkle!
Dumped her too. Poor lass.
Side note: couln't help but notice that there were some mixups between present and past tense at the beginning of the chapter:
Other than that, great chapter
LAWL!dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Twilight_Sparkle_lolface.png Twilight is unloved
Twilight glanced up at the pegasus. "I think I just got dumped..."
LMFAO, gotta be one of the best one liners I've ever seen!
That ending sounds so wrong...XD
While "have" would work better it'll still sound awkward.
Pegasi is the plural form of Pegasus.
Crazy, nude, man running around Canterlot. This ought to be good.
Oh, this is hilarious.
It should be couch, not coach.
5789000 Actually, I think coach is the British term for it... I think.