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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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No! We lost Radiant Star. Why would you do that?
OH why do you taunt me with cliffhangers
It's like you are danging a bottle of water in front of me and I'm dying of thirst
crap I dont know why Star ever listened to her dumbest mistake shes ever made I really hope she gets her body. Really looking forwards towards the next
Now, all we need is for Star to posses(s) Violet's body! Then they will be one...
Ok, I'm gonna crash our Verti-Buck straight into Spark's face. Then, I'm gonna give her a taste of Pink Cloud in bullet form.
1010205
Heh. Eventually this was going to happen.
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*dangles bottle of water*
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Thanks for the comment!
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Hah! Amusing sir. Thanks for the comment!
1012755
In the Equestria Wastland there is one thing you need to remember
and that it "everyone has a gun"
*shoots you in the foot and takes the water*
1012755
Was it something I said? *Pinkamena twitch*
Look on the bright side guys, now atleast Lucky can actually hug Star now
1013910
Best. comment. ever.
Riveting
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Riveting tale, gentlecolt.
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Indeed.
I finally actually get around to reading this and the final chapter is a massive clifhanger. Just my luck.
1088876
Right on. Glad you're enjoying it sofar.
To everyone who's recently favorited this, thank you so much! I haven't been able to get around to thanking you all personally because quite frankly, the influx of you all has been c-raaazy! Rest assured, you are all awesome. Thanks for letting me share this with you. It's very much appreciated.
Hey at least you don't have to worry about being shot and you can hang out with the spectral but still cute Lucky!
Just got around to reading Starlight, and I've already caught up and can't wait for more!
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Thanks! I'm working on 16 with Wire now on brushie stage, so soon.
I don't know why, but Spark and Star remind me of Russia. XD
images.sodahead.com/profiles/0/0/1/8/1/7/5/0/5/Hetalia-Russia-Creepy-90869273655.jpeg
BECOME ONE. DA?
Okay, the line I'm about to quote is the farthest in I've read so far:
"“Every so often they find their way down here. We take them in, and we use them for feeding stock,” She said, motioning around the room. I looked up, seeing hundreds of cocoons, each one containing a different pony in them. There were even a few griffons here and there as well.
“Feeding stock?” I said. “What do you mean?”
“Changelings feed on the powerful emotions given off by the various races of the Wasteland. A long time ago, our race fed on love, pure true love. But that was a long time ago...” The Overmare replied. I had been surrounded by this time, the changeling swarm all around me. “We have not tasted such powerful love in a long time.”"
Moments like this are kinda what I meant earlier. I incorrectly made reference to the idea of Show vs Tell at the time. Thinking about how I'd rather have skipped being shown *this course of dialogue* but I think this scenario in particular is where it became clear I was looking at it wrong. This is a case of telling.
Character asks "What is X?" to another character who doesn't respect them much. The character who doesn't respect them much proceeds to exposition dump the answer so that now Character realizes how much trouble they are in.
It seems particularly weird RIGHT NOW because these changelings have no reason to explain their functioning or motives to a prey they have the upper hoof over. But here they are, giving the info, because the prey asked for it. Which will do them no good in increasing the amount of love they'll have.
Earlier, I probably would have suggested just passing over this exchange with a brief description of what happened. But rather, a good showing of this, would be to have either a sacrificial (Relative to the plot the writer is trying to tell. Not necessarily sacrificial in-world) character being fed on visibly by a changeling, or a memory orb where the narrator rides as a Changeling who does the feeding routine. Then even without being told directly to her face what's happening, the general idea and sense of OH NO, A BAD THING!!! would still get across.
So basically, what I mean is I'm sorry to have steered you wrong with my previous comment, but I probably would need to sit down and make more annotations as I read to effectively explain the bits that concern me. Like me stopping mid-read to point out what I just did. :B
That's a good reference to an amazing band.